Title: Matchmaking
Author: ness
Disclaimer: I don't own them.
Category: other
Rating: PG-13
Thanks: in chronological order, to ELISHEVA for reading this pre-beta, and to EV for beta-ing. Errors mine.
The halls at Rawley were quieter than usual this Saturday lunchtime. Most of the students were probably outside, making the most of the indian summer.
Jake strolled down the hall with a book in her hand, then saw Bella lurking in the corridor. Jake quietly crept up behind her and leaning over her shoulder, spoke in her left ear. "Hey. The thing about furtive is, it Draws Attention. If you stop whipping your head around one hundred and eighty degrees, you might achieve sneaky."
"Jake!" Bella jumped, her hand over her mouth. "Townies aren't supposed to be here" she hissed.
"That is so painfully obvious." Jake hugged Bella. "Let me guess .. looking for Scout?"
Bella nodded, self conscious at being so obvious.
"How did Wednesday go?" Jake wanted to hear all the details of Scout and Bella's first official date.
Bella lit up, blushing. "Our first big date.."
"I know. Scout lives here" Jake teased gently.
"I wonder if he was as nervous as I was."
"Scout? Nah, rock solid, Bell, really" Jake smiled as she thought about the three days before the date. Scout had been so stressed out that Hamilton, Jake and Will had purposely avoided him as much as they could. Will had gone and buried himself in the library the minute classes ended, in the hopes of not having to be consulted on possible topics of conversation again. Scout had then hauled Hamilton and Jake into his dorm to collaborate about his wardrobe. As he held countless hangers in front of them he would ask their opinion on which shirt made him look hottest. Their comments ranged from "That's nice, that'll do" to "That works for me, that looks great" and finally, "Just pick one!!"
Jake ducked her head to hide a smile. She'd thought it was pretty sweet, the way Scout acted, but supposed he would want to maintain some suave quotient. It would be cruel to tell Bella all the sordid details. "Uh, Scout was pretty psyched."
"Come with me. Almost everyone's in the quad. Or Hamilton might have seen him. I'm meeting Ham outside." They headed off.
A minute later, Bella leaned against a tree and welcomed Hamilton with a grin as he jogged up to them. "No," she was telling Jake. "I'm not meeting Scout for a date today. We're taking Will down to Friendly's to cheer him up."
"Will get dumped by Caroline yet?" Hamilton asked.
"Yest- what? God. How'd you know?"
"Have you any idea how much boys gossip?" Jake demanded. "It's a stereotype crushed, I can tell you. But, no. Ham and I kind of thought she would. Based on her personality."
"Or lack of it" Hamilton drawled.
Jake burst out laughing. "Hamilton has so few illusions about rich girls."
Bella eyed her. "Which wouldn't include you."
Jake's voice became cold. "I'm new money sweetie. Those chicks hate me too."
Bella glanced at Hamilton, uncomfortable. She raised her eyebrows at him to say something. His response was "About the illusions; I grew up here remember?"
"They are such bitches-"
"Um, Jake-" Bella frowned at her.
Jake smiled faintly. "I'm not getting into my own issues here. Look over toward the lake. Check out the body language."
Bella realised Jake was reacting to a group of fashionably dressed girls a hundred yards away. "They're picking on the bottle redhead."
"Nothing new there" Hamilton said. "They always treat Lena like she's dirt. Any time I see her she looks -" he broke off and glanced at Jake; Jake was looking guilty, and that was a shame, but he knew how Lena felt. He could teach graduate courses on how to mope round Rawley campus feeling isolated. Poppy and some of the other Rawley girls had been making a big deal out of Lena's lack of a boyfriend for weeks, just as an excuse to have somebody to pick on.
"Uh, Bella, I think we should go and rescue Lena and bring her to Friendly's too" Jake said thoughtfully.
"Oh, so now you're joining the Will suicide watch."
"You know you'll thank us for it girl. If it's just you and Scout he'll wallow in self pity till you want to slap him, but his manly pride will kick in for Ham and me. He'll have to fake cheerfulness."
"I don't want to put him under extra strain."
"It'll be good for him. If you fake happiness awhile sometimes it turns into the real thing."
"Jake's big on tough love" Hamilton sighed.
Jake stared at him; he waggled his eyebrows and she giggled, looking around quickly to see if anyone heard. "I'm not supposed to giggle in public" she hissed.
"Jake!" said Bella. "Was that a furtive look or a hundred and eighty degree head whip?" Bella got to giggle openly. So she did.
"Funny" Jake replied. "Come with me while I rescue Lena and Ham can find Scout and Will. We'll all meet at Friendly's."
"Right." Jake and Bella walked to the lake shore, watching Lena's fight with the other girls. "Hey Lena" Jake called. "Can you do me a huge favor?"
"Collecting fag hags Jacob?" asked Poppy, one of the girls. Jake had had run-ins with her before.
Jake stopped in her tracks. "Actually. No. I'm asking a friend out. Someone I want to talk to. Which would eliminate you you skanky bitch with your pathetic bunch of mini mes, because you haven't the vocabulary to hold a conversation or the personality to make your opinions interesting." Jake grabbed Lena's hand and the three of them got out of there before Poppy and her friends exploded.
It was a minute or two before any of them spoke. "Okay. I lost my temper there."
"You think?" said Lena. She sounded annoyed, not grateful.
"Oh. Sorry. Poppy knows how to push my buttons. She's like, uh, a conglomeration of much hated chicks from my last six schools." Jake saw the totally unmollified look in Lena's eye and groaned.
"Hi. I'm Bella." Bella rolled her eyes at Lena. "And you're Lena. And Jake is acting like a guy."
"Well, yes" said Lena, confused. Lena was asking herself did this Bella person think all gays were effeminate? Of course Jake was acting like a guy, he was one.
"Acting like a guy is a coded insult" Jake explained. "Bella despises aggression. But Poppy so deserved it. You tell her how much she deserved it."
Lena turned to Bella. "She deserved it. But, she deserved it from me."
Jake blushed. "Ouch." Then, very meekly: "I'm sorry."
Oh, wow Lena, I'm impressed, thought Bella. She said "We came over to ask you to join us at Friendly's. The guys keep telling me how much school food blows."
"I hacked into the school budget." Jake recovered. "You would not believe how little they allocate for lunch. The Dean should know better. In his own home, he has Hamilton, going through platefuls like-"
"Hamilton's appetite for food is a freak of nature" said Bella. "We know this to be true."
"Would you like to come?" Jake asked. "Will and Scout are friends; they're cool."
"I'm dating Scout."
"Way to smoothly work that into the conversation Bell." Turning to Lena, Jake added in a less teasing voice: "It's new."
"- and Will, I was gonna say," Bella made a face at Jake "he's my best friend. We grew up next to each other. He's on scholarship."
"Yes" said Jake thoughtfully. "He's really smart. Sensitive, writes poetry."
"Sounds like a paragon. Good looking?"
Jake gave Lena a long stare. "Totally. You'll like him."
Part 2
Jake was still doing introductions while they headed for a table with their lunches "and you know Will from English. Sometimes he's, like, the only student Finn calls upon all through class." Jake noticed Hamilton had eaten most of her fries while she was talking about Will like she was campaigning for his presidency.
"That's 'cause he's smarter than the rest of you" Bella protested, tearing her attention away from Scout for a second.
"That, or Finn has impure thoughts about him." Sadly, Hamilton watched the fries start disappearing into Jake's mouth.
"Ham, man, don't go there. You and Jake freak me out enough as it is." Scout hadn't thought he would ever get used to the weirdness of those two. Even now that he knew Jake was a girl in disguise, he was still making a big thing of it.
"In the interest of not freaking Scout out, tell us about yourself Lena." At least, Will thought, his depression had one good effect. Despite Jake's teasing (and the extreme Will-boosting she was lavishing on him since she and Lena hooked up with him just now was beyond weird and profoundly unJake. Maybe it was a pity thing, postCaroline) - he didn't feel particularly shy with this unknown friend of Jake's. Jake's friend, definitely. Lena looked at and talked to Jake ahead of everyone else at the table. Hamilton was polite to Lena, but not enthusiastic. He also kept giving his girlfriend weird looks for gushing on about how great Will was.
"Hey Jake -" a voice interrupted as Lena drew breath.
"Marcus. What's up?"
"I think my laptop's fried. Can you take a look at it?"
Jake grinned. "Always with the technical language. Lemme see." She left the others, Hamilton trailing absentmindedly after her.
"So." Scout turned to Lena as Jake and Hamilton left. "How'd you know Jake?"
Lena decided on bravado. "I propositioned him when I started at Rawley."
Will, Scout, and Bella choked visibly. "You hit on Jake?" Scout's mouth hung open.
"Well." Lena was red in the face. "He's incredibly cute. I mean, that smile ..right?" she appealed to Bella.
"I never .. really saw Jake that way. You know."
"Because Bella saw rightaway Jake liked boys" Will cut in smoothly.
"I guess I should have, too."
"The Jake/Ham thing was under our noses for weeks and we were clueless" said Will, feeling very mature and tactful. After all, he thought charitably, he and Scout had been partially clueless, so it was kinda true. They'd worked out out the relationship without working out the gender. With the help of what Will thought of as the ever reliable grapevine, they'd deduced Jake and Ham as being an item pretty soon. He remembered them as being very aware very fast. But then again, they had to have the girl thing explained to them. It looked like Lena was still in the dark about that, he realised.
"So - propositioning Jake." Scout leered. "Details?"
"Scout" Bella snapped.
Will punched him. "Ignore him Lena. He's a pig."
"Jake was a perfect gentleman." Lena was still depressed about that.
Scout let out a scream of laughter and the other two buried their faces in their hands for a minute. "Scout's laughing at Jake not you" said Bella in a choked voice.
"Gentlemanly isn't how we see Jake. Annoying. Criminal record waiting to happen. For sure." Will looked satisfied he'd summed it up.
"On the other hand, JAKE describes YOU as a friend." Lena snapped. God, Jake had only said good things about Will on the way into town. Rawley was so full of backbiters.
Nicely pointed, thought Will. "If I wasn't a friend, I wouldn't know all this" he said calmly. "When Jake doesn't want to know guys he fends them off with this - his gaze drifted across the street thinking of the right words - "implacable neutral thing. They only get the mask. Now, Hamilton -" At this point, he shut up, seeing Jake.
"As Finn would say, very insightful Krudsky." I want the focus off of me, Jake thought irritably.
Will gave Jake a nervous stare. He hadn't seen her arrive.
"What?" Hamilton came up with a fresh burger.
Jake looked at Scout and he abruptly stopped laughing. "Scout has been making Lena feel uncomfortable. Which is rude."
Hamilton dumped his food on the table wondering fleetingly how Scout had managed that. Lena had made Ham angry and miserable enough in her time but he'd never seen her lose her cool. Actually, to judge from her expression, she was upset now. And Jake was certainly annoyed. "You don't want to listen to the stuff coming out of Scout's mouth. He's just Captain Tactless." He glanced warily at Jake.
"It's my fault. I just, I was trying to get through an uncomfortable memory on bravado, and it didn't work. Can we just leave it, please?"
Jake stared at Lena unsmiling for a minute then nodded slightly and sat back in her seat. Hamilton dropped one hand on his girlfriend's leg and started tracing spirals on her thigh. "Isn't this kind of a weird place to relax for you guys?" he asked Will and Scout. "You do shifts here most evenings."
"Name me the other Rawley nightspots" Bella demanded.
"Good point."
"I just enjoy watching other people work. Which reminds me - Bella, honey, stop obsessing about Grace across the road. You've got today off." Scout hugged her with one arm.
Will tried not to be mean and petty. The couples weren't cuddling to get under his skin. They were just enjoying being together. The whole salt in wound thing was him projecting. It wasn't as if he found Bella or Jake attractive. Bella had beautiful hair, a beautiful smile. Her eyes looked directly and honestly at any person, any situation. But you put the package together and it was, well, Bella. His earliest memory was of them competing over who had the biggest knee scabs. Feminine mystique, not. And as for Jake .. he'd garrotte himself on dental floss sooner than date her. He considered her, with the baggage that came with her, far too high maintenence. He pitied Ham. He smiled at the last thought, catching Lena's eye. She looked as uncomfortable as he felt. He took a breath and started to talk to her.
Part3
Lena really enjoyed the meal despite not being too crazy about greasy burgers. Thank god, Bella told her about Will and Scout working here before she got round to insulting the food. Bella seemed nice, a very warm personality with a nicely cynical take on Rawley. She was, Lena thought, brighter than her boyfriend, but Scout was very cute. He was flatteringly open about being smitten, too. Lena could see the attraction.
With Bella and Scout being preoccupied with each other and Jake and Hamilton occasionally exchanging in-jokes which lost the rest of the table, Lena was left talking to Will. But she liked all of them, not least because it was clear that neither Bella, Scout nor Will had heard the rumors Poppy had started about how Lena was such an idiot she was still pining for Jake even though she hadn't a chance with him. Unrequited love, painful, thought Lena. Public unrequited love, humiliating. But to have the publicity long after getting over the crush, now that was infuriating.
Most of the lunch crowd left to watch a townie basketball game but Jake and Lena were having an insanely technical film discussion. Lena was holding forth on "the golden age of Cary Grant and Jimmy Stewart" and Jake was being non laconic about "the way the Coen brothers have used the Capra legacy."
Will was mystified.
"None of my friends will watch videos with me anymore" confessed Lena. "I yell FORESHADOWING at the screen and point. It isn't pretty."
I can believe you, Hamilton thought grimly.
"I grew up listening to Mom and her friends - every last one of whom is a show business contact - analysing the lighting, the performances, cinematography, pricing what the lead's wearing ..I'm now unable to watch and go, ooh, cute story."
"Sadly, even when it's Steven Seagal." Hamilton said.
Neither Bella nor Scout reacted. They were trapped at the back of the booth exchanging heartfelt God-get-me-out-of-here looks.
Will said disbelievingly "You deconstruct movies?"
"Of course," Lena said. "It's a family thing, like Jake said."
"Wow. I thought that level of criticism was for books."
"Hey. Scout deconstructs wrestling." Hamilton interrupted.
"And congressional votes, Ham" said Bella, tired of the way Scout was always set up to be the comedy moron. She'd done it to him herself more often than she liked to remember.
"What?" Lena was startled. "Votes? What?"
"His dad-" Bella explained.
"Works in Washington." Scout finished without missing a beat.
Bella smiled. "Finishing each other's sentences, how scary is that?"
"Not scary. I'm cool with it." Scout looked adoring. At some point in romancing Bella, he had totally ditched the playing it cool thing. Will would say it had been an early point. OK. There was lack of dignity, and there was making his girlfriend insecure. He'd made his choice.
"Oh. And you, Will, do you deconstruct books to be more like your dad?" Lena was surprised when Will snorted.
"No." He laughed bitterly. Noone picked up the conversational ball, and he added after a minute "Uh, I guess I kind of do it for myself."
"A man who thinks for himself-" Lena shifted toward him. "So. What kind of books occupy your mind?"
Hamilton muttered to Jake: "Is this some kind of come-on. 'Cause it's doing nothing for me."
Jake responded at the same volume "Don't think it's aimed at either you or me baby."
As he was right next to her neck for the private communication, he took a moment to inhale the warmth rising from Jake's skin. "Halleluljah." he muttered.
Will was praising Hemingway.
"Hemingway" Lena repeated witheringly. "He's so buried in performing male stereotypes. There's no directness, no honest emotion there."
Huh. You fell for Jake, Will thought. "So" he challenged, "who do you suggest?"
Hamilton watched them go into a one on one. Go Will, he thought. That girl loved to give her opinions. He pulled Jake closer and prayed that Will and Lena would make a connection. Then Jake could stop feeling responsible for Lena's unhappiness. It wasn't Jake's fault Lena had a crush on her.