Took me long enough, I had trouble writing to a point…and it's so short….how depressing. Ah well, better than nothing, right? It's an ending at least, lol. Remember this is in Bakura's PoV. Please enjoy. See you all again sometime, I thank those who have lately been pestering me to update things -- this is for you all.
Ahh…and…I do not own the song "First Day of My Life" by The Rasmus. -smirk-
"Feel like I'm stoned
wanna be alone, just for a while, unknown
Weeks on the road a long way from home
just shut off the phone
And you say I'll heal you,
I'll always be yours
and you say I'll kill you if I do something wrong
yeah, yeah, yeah ,yeah, yeah, yeah
Still feels like the first time
to stand here by your side
together regardless
we'll walk through the darkness
Still feels like the first day of my life
Remember the times
together we swore, never give up this life
still hanging on, still going strong
here I belong."
Epilogue
I used to believe that the will to live was stupid. There was nothing in the world that could keep me connected to it; I lost that too long ago, there had been a small fire in me, giving me a flicker of hope. That flicker died quickly, my fire-of-so-called-hope was gone. And when I couldn't take it anymore, I killed myself.
What a stupid idiot I was.
But how was I supposed to know how much he cared? He wasn't exactly helpful. Yet then he tried to kill himself and I was finally able to confront him. There was no way I would let him share my fate. …Even if it was probably kind of creepy having a ghost confront you. Then again, if I had a ghost confront me, I'd most likely shrug it off and tell it to fuck off.
Unless he were to confront me.
Which is unlikely.
…Dammit.
"You're still upset, aren't you?"
"…What do you think?"
"I think he wouldn't want you moping around. Don't you? I mean…he did kind of…well, sacrifice himself for you, didn't he?"
"Hn," I turned away, arms crossed. What does he know?
"Fine, be like that," my other mutters, but I can still feel his presence near. "Just…don't leave again, ok?" I faced him again, brow raised. His tone was like that of a scared little child. "Don't kill yourself again…you left me alone…I don't want to go through that feeling again…"
Aww…my other half missed me.
I placed a hand on his head and he stopped babbling, blinking up at me. "I may be upset, Ryou, but I'm not going anywhere again. Not after all that. Just relax already." He brightened up at my words and nodded, saying a quick 'feel better' before leaving the room.
But I don't know if I even wanted to feel better. If I did…would that mean he'd be gone forever? I know he's gone now, but we're all still thinking of him…still hoping. But nothing is happening. Nothing is helping. You're still gone and that's that.
Makes me want to…
…Hell, I don't know. I can't say 'kill myself' because I promised Ryou. And I can't do that because it would just be a waste…I don't think he'd be happy to see me dead…again.
I really should stop doing these evening strolls around the park…they make me think too much.
"Is something upsetting you, little boy?"
I glanced towards a woman with dark hair. Dark jeans, dark shirt, dark eyes; is it just me or does she seem like the morbid type? Especially with that smile…creepy. Hey wait, I'm no little boy! How dare she -- "Oh I apologize, that was rather forward of me…It's just that you looked so unhappy…"
"My friend died, happy?" I scoffed and started to walk by her, hearing her voice whisper out smugly as I passed.
"Of course."
I blinked and turned, eyes wide as I stared around. What the hell…? She's bloody gone! Fucking hell…right, right…. definitely no more evening strolls…
"You can't keep this up!"
Some little punk keeps following me on my 'dawn stroll.'
"Will you at least look at me?!"
No, because that will show that I've acknowledged that I'm being followed.
"If you never look at me, then you'll never be able to see him again, you stubborn spirit!" he yelled and I stopped, eyes darkening. What the fuck is he… Who does he think he is…
I turned slowly, eyes flashing with anger. This kid is going to pay for bringing up… "It's you."
The boy smirked. I'm going to kill him. I'm going to kill that punk! "What the fuck are you doing here?! Haven't you messed with my life enough Fu…Fu…"
"Fukusuke Assi," the boy hummed, rocking on the balls of his feet. "Don't tell me you didn't miss me? I couldn't help to not see you for so long…although it hasn't been that long after the ending of the tests…"
"Speaking of which…" I growled, keeping fists at my sides. Can't kill him yet. Can't… "Why the hell am I alive? We failed. We're both supposed to die if we fail…"
"Yes, that's true."
Fukusuke Assi. He was the director…I guess you could say. The one who put Yami and myself through three tests. If we failed any of them, we were both to die. But…only Yami died…and that left me alone without him. Sick and twisted change of events…I was the dead one, now he's the dead one. Only this time…he's not a ghost.
"Then why --"
"Dear Bakura, you're accusing me as if I've screwed something up…" he paused and turned his gaze to the sky. "Has he always been this impatient? …Ah, yes, I see…" I glared at him until he returned his gaze onto me. "Look, you really should relax, it's unhealthy to be this stressful."
"It takes awhile for things to be processed, you must cut us some slack." The woman I ran into last night was back. Right besides the kid…they almost looked like twins…except she was older, of course… My head is really starting to hurt…
Fukusuke stepped forward and I took one back, but he kept walking ahead anyway. He sighed softly, "You're alive. If you failed, you would be dead. Has that sunk into your brain?"
"Yeah, but --"
"Has that sunk into your brain?"
"Yes," I muttered. I planned on saying more, but he put a finger to my lips and shushed me. He turned his head and nodded to the woman, who chose to step away to leave one other figure standing there. "What…? It…can't…"
"You never failed, idiot," Fukusuke slapped my head as he stepped to my side. "Your 'beloved' figured out my little puzzle when he 'died.' Of course, he never really did die…as you can see…"
I shook my head and took a step back, eyes probably the size of golf balls now. "You -- but I -- watched you --"
Yami's gaze stared back at me softly and he walked past Fukusuke, I stood there frozen. He placed a hand on my shoulder; it was solid, not ghastly in any way. "Yami?" I whispered a bit brokenly. Fukusuke and the woman were moving away. I turned away quickly from Yami and towards them. "This isn't some sort of joke, right? You don't just go around messing with peoples' heads, right?"
"…Bakura, I'm right here," Yami tried to insist, but rolled his eyes and crossed his arms as the other followed the two.
"Will you please answer me?" I was begging, who gives a damn. "If this is a dream, or if you don't really exist. Hell, maybe I've just been dead this whole time!"
Fukusuke stopped and turned to me, watching carefully. But he said nothing. Why won't the brat answer me…?
"Oh, don't you remember?" It was the woman who spoke. She walked to me and lifted my head with a hand. Bloody hell, her hands are freezing! She examined me carefully, yet surprising to myself, I didn't move. "You were never dreaming. You were dead as a doornail when I found your soul wandering the borderlines of life and death, wishing that you hadn't done anything so stupid." Thanks for rubbing it in. "Mind you, I was wearing all black at the time and my nutcase of a brother wasn't around, but I allowed your spirit to pass into the living world. …How can you not remember?" she placed her free hand to my cheek and I jerked away, stumbling back. Yami came to my side in silence.
"What the fuck are you trying to do to me?!" I yelled, kneeling down and holding my head.
"Can I help you?"
"Leave me alone," the figure whined. "I already helped myself enough today. Or yesterday. Or…whenever it was…" he seemed confused now. His head ached more.
"Really? Seems you just screwed things up for yourself instead of making things better. Let me help you. I hate seeing lost souls in my domain…" the woman seemed to be a morbid type by the way she looked. Her clothes weren't helping her image either. Pale skin only added to the creepiness.
"Your domain?" he blinked and glanced around.
"Do you even know where you are?"
"…Not…really…"
"Get out of my head," I cried and felt Yami put his arms around me as I began to tremble. "I don't want to remember; stay out of my mind!"
She shook her head and stepped out before him, waving a hand to the ground. The dull coloring rippled and pulled apart to reveal a mirror. He glanced down curiously and blinked, startled at seeing images of houses and people he used to know.
"That is the living world."
"So I'm in the world of the dead. Surprise, surprise, Bakura," he told himself bitterly.
"Wrong," she chuckled. "You're in neither. Silly spirit, you wedged yourself in between both!"
He cringed, annoyed. "That's not possible --"
"Oh, yes it is! Come on, let's get you out of here."
"No, I don't want to go anywhere," he stepped away from her quickly. But his eyes caught sight of the mirror again and his eyes widened in shock. "Yami."
"Don't get in too much trouble," she smiled and pushed him towards the mirror and he felt his body slip.
The pain in my head stopped. I drew in a few breaths and stared up, but only Fukusuke was still around. The woman was gone.
"My sister likes to help people sometimes. But it doesn't always work. Sometimes if she allows the dead to wander the living world, things go wrong, or spirits just get lost and experience more pain. But you weren't so stupid…congratulations, you both came back from the dead." He was gone too.
I rubbed my head, almost forgetting about the arms around me.
"Hey, Bakura," Yami finally whispered and I turned in his arms, embracing him tightly.
"I missed you…"
"We aren't going anywhere for awhile again."
"And maybe I'm crazy
but I just can't slow down
And maybe I'm crazy
but at least I'm still around
yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Still feels like the first time
to stand here by your side
together regardless
we'll walk through the darkness
Still feels like the first day of my life
Feels like the first day of my life,
(feels like the first day)
Still feels like the first day of my life
Still feels like the first time
to stand here by your side
together regardless
we'll walk through the darkness
Still feels like the first day of my
still feels like the first day of my
still feels like the first day of my life."
And there be the ending and long, long last XD I finally got a musing the day I posted this…so I wrote it as best I could. Now to go carve pumpkins. -smiles-