Disclaimer: Ed Edd n Eddy no belong to moi. O-o
By the way, if I ever mention the boys' eye or hair colors in the story, I'm basing them off of how my friend draws them. On to the story!
It was a cold, December night in the culdesac. I was on my bed watching TV while Ed read comics over in the corner, and Double-D was working on some kind of journal or something.
I stared blankly at the dull TV as rerun after rerun played on it. "I hate reruns. They piss me off." Yep. They sure do. Pretty soon it got late into the night, some time after midnight. Double-D was now asleep over at my desk, and Ed was playing with his stupid little action figures.
"I'm gonna go get a drink." I slipped off my bed and left the room, turning off the TV as I went, leaving those two in total darkness. Ed didn't seem to notice. I traveled down the hall to the kitchen, swaying a little with drowsiness. Through the front window I could see the full moon, high up in the sky. Snow lay over the ground like a deep white blanket, sparkling in the light. I only stared at it a second before I poured some lemonade from the pitcher.
As I was about to put it back, red light flooded in through the windows like fire. The pitcher shattered as I was thrown against the fridge by some unknown force. The house shook terribly and there was a deafening crash in the back yard.
When it was over, I groaned and rubbed my head. "Oww..." I heard a loud "WOAH" from Ed. I stood up and scrambled to my bedroom and out the back door.
I could hardly believe what I saw. It was like something out of Ed's comic books. It was a white space pod, about the size of a recliner, and it was embedded deep into my back yard. All of the snow around it was completely melted. "What the..." Double-D, Ed, and I stared wide-eyed at this unbelievable thing. my yard..." I said slowly, trying to pull myself back together.
"This is SO COOL, YOU GUYS!" screamed Ed.
"It's AMAZING!" agreed the sockhead.
The steaming pod's hatch opened. "All right, aliens!!" screamed Ed. Double-D pulled out his notepad and started scribbling some words. A coughing noise was heard coming from the pod. The being crawled out, and tumbled into the grass in front of us. It looked like...
"A girl?!"
She had long purple hair and what looked like yellow eyes. She was wearing a knee-length gray and black shirt, and white and blue socks on her feet. Not to mention she was very short.
As she sat pathetic on the ground, looking sick, Double-D went on one of his rants as Ed was trying to climb into the girl's pod. "She's not an extra-terrestrial? Well, then surely she must have built this ingenious craft and a glitch caused her to crash in Eddy's yard!" He went over to her. I plopped on the ground, a disbelieving look plastered on my face.
"Excuse me, miss." he addressed her. She squinted at him like she couldn't focus. "My name is Edward, but you may call me Double-D as everyone does." he laughed to himself. "This is an excellent craft you have here. Did you make it yourself? And whatever for did you land in this backyard?" After making a face at him for a moment, she turned over and emptied her stomach. "Um...are you sick?" She wiped her mouth and turned back over.
"Never travel to a planet like this with such a crappy brand of space pods." She told him with a weak smile. Double-D gasped.
"So...you aren't from this planet?" The girl shook her head and laughed.
"I'm from the planet Tarfia and I'm lookin' for a mister Ed, Edd, and Eddy. Did I set my coordinates right?" At this point I walked over to them. Every now and then you could hear an occasional "cool" or "awesome" from inside the pod.
Sockhead laughed again. "Why, yes you did. Like I said before, I'm Double-D, and this is Eddy," he pointed to me and I waved, still not completely realizing there was an alien in my back yard. "And over there is...wait, where is Ed?"
"I'm in here Double-D!" said the pod. Double-D put on a scornful look. "ED!! You get out of there, this second! That doesn't belong to you!" Whining, he tumbled down it, just like the girl did. "I'm terribly sorry about that, Ed just loves things like that." The girl smiled at us.
"It's all right. The thing put me through heck for two and a half days, so at the moment I don't care what happens to it. Besides, It's already broken. It's going to need some time to be fixed. But I don't know how to, I'm going to have to send a call to my planet and ask them about it." Sockhead grinned very broadly.
"There's no need to do that! I'm an expert at mechanics! I could examine your pod tonight and have it fixed ASAP!" The girl let loose a sigh of relief.
"Hey, squirt, you said that you wanted to see us." I reminded her.
"Oh, yes! - Hey, I'm as tall as you are!" she said with a grumpy look as she stood up to her full height.
"Huh." was all I could say.
"My name is Loli," she said, looking somewhat happy again. "I'm here because my planet is under attack by some powerful force. I was created for the sole purpose of bringing the Chosen One back to Tarfia so he can be trained to save our planet and return it back to harmony."
"So, who's the Chosen One?" I said, raising an eyebrow. Loli clasped her hands together and extended them towards me.
"That would be you, Eddy-ta." I took a step back.
"M-me? Hey, listen girlie, I don't do the whole 'alien' thing. That's Ed's department." She looked sad.
"But you must! The fate of my planet is at stake! And only the Chosen One can use the special mecha!"
I shook my head firmly, and was shaken roughly at the shoulders from behind. "EDDY! SHE'S GOT MEEEECHHHAAA!!" wailed Ed.
"W-w-w-w-what the hell is m-m-m-m-mecha?!!" I cried, trying to break free from Ed.
"Giant fighting robots, to be precise." said Double-D, who seemed very excited about the whole thing.
I was still unsure. "I...dunno..."
"You will be known as heroes and will be heavily rewarded." she gave her last shot. This, however, struck my interest.
"Did you say, 'heavily rewarded'?" I grinned slyly. The other three relaxed. Loli nodded.
"Hoo-ray! I cannot wait to go fight the evil aliens, no I cannot!"
"I think she meant only Eddy can go, Ed." said Double-D a bit sadly.
"Yay!" he didn't seem to be getting it. Loli shook her head.
"Nope. You two hafta come too. There's a special mecha for each of you. They're not quite as strong as Eddy-ta's, but we still need you." Double-D threw his fists into the air.
"Yes! Finally, a chance to study alien life!!"
"So, when are we leaving?" I asked, getting more and more into the idea of becoming rich and famous.
"Whenever my pod's fixed. Whelp, I'm going to bed now." She walked into my room and slammed the door behind her.
"Think you can fix this thing, Double-D?" He was circling it, and making little notes.
"I'll stay up with Ed for a while and look at it. You should get some sleep, space hero. Do you mind if we use some of the tools and parts in your garage?" I shook my head, took one last look at the moon, and looked back at Double-D.
"You guys should put on your jackets. The cold's coming back and it's starting to snow again."
"Thank you Eddy." I saluted him and went back through the door.
That girl, Loli, was curled up on top of my bed. "Oh no you don't!!" I shouted, pushing her to the floor, my face red with anger.
"Ouch!!" she whined. "How can you be so mean??" she yelled back, tears in her eyes. She was an awful crybaby. How old was she, anyway?
"That's MY bed, and I'm not givin' it up to a girl like you!" I glared at her.
"B-but, where am I supposed to sleep?" she sniffled. I stomped over to the closet and yanked the sliding door. I stood on a stool to reach the top shelf and grabbed one of those scratchy blankets and a flat pillow. Stepping back down from the stool, I kicked it away, and laid out the blanket in the bottom of my closet.
"You sleep here. And I'd better not hear a thing from you all night." A few tears rolled down her pathetic face as she crawled into the closet. I pulled the door shut. I could see her timid eyes staring at me through the spaces in-between the pieces of wood. She needs to grow up, I thought bitterly, the whole universe isn't peaches and cream.
I spotted Ed and Double-D in the moonlight through my window, snowflakes falling heavily around them, those two talking and full of the energy I was lacking. I lay down underneath my covers and tried to sleep.