Halfway through the night she woke up from a dream of memories from her engagement. When her eyes adjusted she could see Sesshomaru standing over her. She also noticed that he was only wearing a pair of shorts. She blushed at seeing his well sculpted muscles and thanked God that it was too dark for him to see the blush coloring her cheeks. "Thank you for waking me up."

"Will you be fine?"

"Yes, I think so...I didn't realize I was being so loud."

"You weren't. I am sleeping on the floor tonight."

"Why?" She then noticed that she was in his room and there were blankets and a pillow on the floor.

"Father came here an hour after you went to bed to talk about what we are going to do since we told Naraku to take his business elsewhere."

"You are ruining your business over me?" She sat up in bed and stared at him.

"Father won't do business with anyone who is a threat to the happiness of his family. Besides, the loss of Naraku's business won't hurt us much."

Rin sat there in quiet contemplation before asking, "Why am I in your room then?"

"He was too exhausted to go back home. While he was on the phone with Izayoi I carried you into my room."

"How did you explain all my things in that room?"

"You wanted your own space."

She nodded her head and offered, "You can sleep in the bed with me. We are married after all."

He looked at the other side of the bed and then at her. "I don't think that would be wise."

"What could go wrong?" She gave him one of her signature smiles. After what seemed like a long period of debate occurring in his head, he climbed into bed next to her.

Rin woke up early in the morning to the warm and content feeling of being held in strong arms. She turned over still in his grip to watch him as he slept. He seemed so peaceful. Slowly his eyes opened. "Good morning," she whispered. He started to remove his arms, but Rin protested, "No, I needed this last night."

He tightened his grip on her and inquired, "Did Naraku ever hold you like this?"

"No, I am practicing abstinence. Although I guess that now I'm married and cho..." She looked deep into the amber pools of his eyes. She knew exactly why she felt so comfortable with him at that moment. His eyes were reflecting the same want that comes between a husband and wife, and here they were, husband and wife sharing a bed and holding each other closely. This was why he thought it wouldn't be a wise decision to sleep in the bed with her, but right now she didn't care too much about these thoughts.

Before she knew it, she was kissing him with all the passion she held for him. When her mind came back to her she broke their kisses and wiggled out of his arms and the bed. "I'm sorry, I can't. It'll only make things difficult emotionally."

"It's too late for that."

"I'm sorry," she wailed before leaving the room in a hurry and going into the bathroom. She stared at herself in the mirror for several minutes as she touched her fingers to her lips and thought about how good it felt for her to be in his arms and to kiss him. 'We've been married for awhile, so it's been awhile since he's been with a woman. Then I practically throw myself at him. No wonder he was ready to go through the act. But I can't believe I was ready to just hand him my heart. I can't believe I want him like that. When I first met him I couldn't stand him, and now I...I love him. No, I can't love him. Love is more than just wanting the physical relationship. I know that I do care for him deeply, but love is too strong of a word...of an emotion. He could never love me. I'm just the stupid girl he conned into his fake marriage.'

She left the bathroom and went to make tea. She could hear Sesshomaru go from his room to the bathroom groaning the whole way. Toga came out to the kitchen fully dressed shortly after the shower started. "Good morning, Rin."

"Good morning. Would you like some tea?"

"Actually I was about to ask you if you would like to come to church with me."

"I don't know. I haven't gone to church since my parents died."

"Give it a chance. If you don't enjoy it after a couple of weeks, then I'll never ask again. Besides, it sounds like you and Sesshomaru need to both cool down."

"You heard us?"

"It's nothing to be embarrassed about in front of your father-in-law. Every couple has their share of arguments." Rin breathed a silent sigh of relief. "So, will you come?"

"I guess I will."

"Good. Get your clothes and anything you need. You can get ready at my house."

Rin went into her room and changed into a pair of jeans and a t-shirt. She picked out a dress and pulled out a bag and started packing her things in the bag. Afterward she went into the bathroom. Sesshomaru was still in the shower. She gathered her things and announced, "I am going with your family to church." She left the bathroom and joined Toga while still trying to hide her blush.

When they got to the mansion Izayoi gave her towels and ushered her into the guest bathroom. While Rin was the in the shower Izayoi did her hair at the sink and talked. "Are you feeling okay?"

"Yeah. I just...just realized that I hadn't dealt with the past."

"It's a good thing you are coming with us today then. Now, if only we could get Sesshomaru to come."

"Good luck."

"I heard from Toga that you got into a fight."

"Word seems to travel fast in this family."

"Sometimes. It's not often when we hear about something Sesshomaru has done. He's always been such a loner. With you around he's been more...accessible. You're slowly changing him into a better man."

'She obviously didn't see how much anger was in his eyes when I saw him right before I left.' "I think you're mistaken. We must not be talking about the same Sesshomaru." She turned the shower off and asked, "Izayoi, can you leave for a couple of minutes so that I can get dressed?"

"Bashful?"

"Nope, modest." Izayoi stepped out closing the door behind her. Rin opened the curtain and stared at herself in the mirror. 'He's never going to forgive me for leading him on and then leaving to...' She shook the thought out of her mind and got dressed quickly into a flower patterned long, flowing skirt and a matching shirt with a cardigan over it.

Rin opened the door to allow Izayoi in. Her mother-in-law stared at her for a minute in shock. This made Rin feel uncomfortable, so she turned her attention away and started brushing her hair. "It's amazing how many physical features you have identical to Sesshomaru's mother."

"Really? I've never seen a picture of her."

"I'll find one for you later. I'm surprised that he hasn't shown you a picture of her yet."

"He doesn't like to talk about her. It is obvious that he's been deeply affected by his mother's death, even if he wasn't old enough to remember it."

"He has. He had always let me know that she could not be replaced. I didn't want to replace her; I just wanted to be a mother."

"He wouldn't allow it though..." Rin could see Izayoi nod in the mirror. "He has always told me that he felt like he was the unwanted family member."

"We always treated him like family, but he never wanted to accept us as his family." They continued what they were doing in silence. Once she had finished she went downstairs to put her bag in her car. When she got in she started washing the dishes, despite the fact that they had servants who did that. Toga and Izayoi found her and told her they were ready to leave. "We'll meet Inuyasha and Kagome there," Toga announced.

"Oh, okay." She dried her hands and picked up her rings from the counter.

Toga looked intently at the rings as she put them on. "May I see them?"

"Sure." She took them off again and handed them to him.

He examined them well before saying, "These belonged to Sesshomaru's mother. He was given them to keep when he was eighteen. I'm surprised that he gave them to you because he wasn't very happy to receive them. Anything that remains of his mother he has always tried to keep locked away."

"For never having known her, he took it hard."

"That he did. That's why I am surprised he married someone who looked so much like her, and he gave you her rings. You've helped him in dealing with the pain. I always knew you would be able to since you are just like her. She used to make everyone feel happy and loved, not unlike my wonderful Izayoi." He wrapped his arms around his wife and kissed her sweetly on the cheek. Rin just watched them, her emotions craving someone to do that to her.

On the way there Rin thought about when she had turned her back on God. After her parents' death she had so many questions, but all people could tell her was 'It was their time' and 'Sometimes God's plans don't make sense to us'. She didn't doubt that they were in a happier place, but why did they have to have their lives end so soon and so violently. Then almost all of her friends left, but when she looked back she could understand that she was pushing most of them away. Eri was strong enough to stay with her, and she encouraged her through everything.

However, Eri was not the greatest influence on her, and no matter how much Eri encouraged her in her Sota walk, Naraku's bidding her to leave the church had more of an effect. He had told her that God could not exist since the world was full of evil, and she had believed him.

"What are you thinking about?" Izayoi asked bringing Rin out of her thoughts.

"Why I left the church."

"Why is that?"

"Naraku told me that there couldn't be a loving God that allowed bad things to happen."

"Many people believe that when something bad happens to them. I know that I have several times."

"Why does he allow horrible things to happen?"

"You're in luck. Today the sermon is exactly about that topic." She smiled at Rin. When she was younger, she remembered how interesting it was that the sermon would often apply to something that she was struggling with, and today would be no exception.

Rin listened intently to the sermon as the minister explained how bad things happen because evil exists in the world. He contended that it was for that reason that people made wrong choices, and those choices would have consequences, both for them and for others. However, this does not make God unreasonable since He punishes us for our own good, to teach us the difference between right and wrong. The sermon also explained that God will care for our needs, but He does not always do it in the way we expect Him to.

The service ended, and Rin went with Eri to her Bible class since Kagome and Inuyasha went to the class for young couples, while Toga and Izayoi went to the class for those in their age group. The topic for the class was forgiveness, and Rin listened intently while the memory of the morning ran through her mind. Her heart pounded as she realized that she had been the one in the wrong by tempting him when he had put up an objection.