A/N: REALLY, really sorry that I haven't posted in a super long while. I made this chapter longer than my usual post so you guys are sustained until I get the chance to write more. School's been keeping me busy and then I have other stuff to do so I haven't had much free time. Stay tuned for more!

Chapter 4- Call me Linda

Hermione entered the room sopping wet. The walk in the rain had cleared her mind and she had decided to talk to Neville. It wasn't fair to lead him on like this. No matter how confused she was, she needed to make sure that he understood that she wasn't ready for any kind of relationship right now. She sighed as she started stripping of her wet clothes.

"You know you shouldn't do that when other people are present in the room. You might blind them," Ron commented, casually sprawled on the couch in front of the fireplace.

Hermione screamed and threw the sopping wet cloak at him. With a loud THWACK, Ron was effectively silenced. "Bloody hell Ron! What are you doing here?! I thought you guys had left!"

"Correction: Neville took Fred, George, and Harry to a pub. I stayed here because I want some answers."

"Answers?! Answers to what, Ron?" Hermione asked, pulling out some clean clothes from her bureau. "Well, ask away and make it fast, I have to take a shower. I've been out in the cold rain, you know."

"I can see that Hermione. Could you do me a favor and cut me some rough diamonds I happen to have? "

Hermione threw a pillow at his head. "Piss off! It's not like you haven't seen 'em before," she said as she crossed her arms in front of her.

"Yeah, that show you put on earlier was really great. Funny how, on the way up here, Fred and George were complaining that you were boring."

Hermione sighed. "Listen Ron, do you have a question or are you just going to talk my ear off?" She rummaged around in her bureau stand looking for some bubble bath to make her bath more relaxing.

"So how long have you been shagging Neville?" Ron questioned nonchalantly, examining his fingernails on the couch.

"EXCUSE ME? I have NOT, or ever will be shagging Neville!" Hermione stared at Ron, horrified. "He's like one of you guys! Or my brother! Sorry Ron, but I'm not into proverbial incest," Hermione exclaimed. Good lord what had brought that on? You get caught on top of a guy by all your friends and all of a sudden you've been shagging him since kingdom come?!

"Well, it's just my opinion, but friends don't usually get that close, if you know what I mean. So if you aren't shagging him, then what are you doing in the same room with only one bed?" At this Ron winked suggestively which earned him another pillow thrown at his face. This time he was ready and dodged it, but didn't avoid the second one which smacked him full on the face.

"Ron! Egads, you're such a perv! That's it! I'm going to take my bath. You can do what you want." Hermione stalked to the bathroom and slammed the door shut.

"Fine, don't answer my questions! But I 'll find out sooner or later 'Mione! I always do!" Ron threatened from behind the closed door.

Well what did she expect from a guy?Being best friends with guys had it's advantages and then it had it's disadvantages. Sometimes she couldn't believe what they talked about. Like that time they were talking about what kind of porno they would do if they could. Cowboys! Who were they kidding!! HA!

Hermione caught her reflection in the mirror. Her normally wavy hair had gone back to her early Hogwarts years style. She looked like an electrocuted chinchilla! She sighed and stripped off her clothes. Luckily for her, she had brought her wand with, so she transfigured the shower into a luxurious Jacuzzi with lots of jets. She decided that she needed some pampering after having such a horrible day, so she lit some candles around the tub and soft music suddenly came out of nowhere.

Ahh, this is the life. Too bad I don't have someone to share this tub with.

With that thought, a gremlin image popped into her mind and she saw a rippling torso covered with droplets of water, slowly sliding down, only to be halted by white terry cloth at the waist.

Whoa! Where did that come from? I really shouldn't think of Neville that way, he's just a friend, nothing more.

Or is he? came a voice.

Hermione fought with her thoughts as she lathered up. Well, yes, Neville is very attractive now.

Admit it, you know he's a super fox. a voice said. The soap in her hands slipped out and she sat there, her lips in a round 'O' of surprise. Where had that come from?!

From me, you dumb-ass! I've been watching you with Neville and I think you need my help. Call me Linda. Great! Just great! Now I'm hearing voices in my head. Maybe all of this was brought on by all the stress I've been feeling lately.

I'm not a voice in your head. I'm a ghost.

"What are you doing here? Why are you bugging me?"

I'm here to help you out. I know what you need: SEX!

"Excuse me?! No, that's the last thing I need right now! I have too much on my plate."

Like what? Don't tell me you didn't like it when you were making out with Neville! Puh-leeze! You were all over him like a fat kid on cake!

"What! No I wasn't! And besides, it's not about Neville. It's something else."

Like?

"Kevin. When he left me, I didn't know what to do. I mean, I thought I loved him but I guess he didn't love me. I tried to get in touch with him but he wouldn't talk to me. I saw him one day in Diagon Alley. He didn't know I was there. I saw him waiting and just as I was going to call out to him, a women came by and she kissed him. It was only a week later and he had already found someone else. And then I saw him again at the OotP council meeting. I said "Hi" And he just looked at me and walked away. Nothing. All those months spent together and that was all I got."

Hermione stared ahead, waiting for a response. She realized that she was actually waiting for Linda to talk back.

I must be going crazy. Or something.

Hermione got out of her bath and changed into her pajamas. She decided to wait up for the guys. Lighting a fire in the fireplace, Hermione adjusted herself on the couch with a blanket and a book to make time go by, all the while waiting for the door to open. An hour went by and her head was slowly but surely falling against the back of the couch. She finally fell asleep, couch and all, and that's where Neville found her.

Being slightly inebriated, he stumbled a bit in the room but he still managed not to fall on his face. He stopped suddenly as he noticed that Hermione was asleep on his couch. He stood there just looking at her.

"You're so beautiful. I wish that you could hear me but you can't. I love the way your hair falls. I love it when you read a book and I can tell what's going on because of your facial expressions. I love how you're so loyal and yet you have no trouble telling the people you love that they are wrong. I wish that you loved me more than a friend but I know that won't happen. But most of all I wish that you loved me as much as I love you." Neville placed a kiss on Hermione's forehead. She stirred in her sleep but she didn't wake up. He stood looking at her for one more moment, drinking in her facial features and the way her body curved on the couch. He stroked her cheek and then he picked her up from the couch. Hermione snuggled closer to Neville in his arms. She sighed in the crook of his neck and Neville closed his eyes to savor it. He took in the feeling of her in his arms, her body close to his, but not as close as he wanted it to be. Gently he placed her on the bed. With one last look, he stroked the top of her head and then he walked away. He had some sobering up and some thinking to do.

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Hermione woke up feeling particularly satisfied. She didn't know why but she felt content and languid. She had a great dream where she was being carried in the arms of someone. She remembered feeling totally safe and loved and she was just about to wake up when she turned in bed and the covers were put around her. She sat up and stretched, when suddenly:

Hi again!

Hermione screamed and tumbled off the bed. Linda was right in front of her, halfway in the mattress.

"Dammit Linda! Don't do that! And what do you want?!"

I know something you don't know!

"And that is?" Hermione sighed in frustration. This was worse than when she was baby-sitting some of her cousin's children from America.

It's about you and Neville. Linda snickered. Oh yeah this is going to be good!

"Well, out with it!" Hermione yelled at the ghost. Damn, she's worse than Peeves!

That's not nice! Don't compare me with that fiend! And besides, I think you'll like my news.

"WHAT IS IT!" Hermione screamed.

You and Neville are going on a mission. To-geh-ther! All alone, wink wink!

Hermione sat there, not knowing how to react. Part of her was really glad, the other was confused. Missions could be as long as a month or a year. Hermione didn't know if she could take all that time with him and not get hurt again.

Oh please! Stop being such a wuss!

"I AM NOT A WUSS! DAMMIT WHY DON'T YOU LEAVE ME ALONE!"

Neville stood in the doorway utterly confused.

"Umm, if that's what you want Hermione, alright" he closed the door and walked downstairs. Must be that time of the month.

"AAAARRRGGGHHH! I can see this is going to be another one of those days."

You bet! Linda chimed and laughed. You have no idea.

ZZZzZzZzZzzzzzzzZzZzZzZZ

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