Chapter 2
She sat on the park bench, watching Ruckus running around, chasing the birds, marveling at them. How they flew off, just as Ruckus was about to pounce. If only life were that simple, she thought to herself, if only I could fly off whenever I wanted, and not have to worry about the mess I would leave behind. She often thought of leaving Vince, he just wasn't the same man anymore, and hadn't been ever since the early ninety's when the steroid trial had taken place.
She had tried hundreds of times to lift him out of the depression he had been in, but to no avail. It was as if he had cut himself off from everyone, the people and the places he loved, and just surrounded himself with his work. Even the children had noticed it, they had tried too but not even they could do anything. From the outside looking in, it was though Vince and Linda were the perfect couple, always smiling, always teasing in the way that married couples do. No one would have known that behind the scenes they barely spoke to one another, they hadn't touched each other in years. Vince was a workaholic who lived for his work and Linda was despairing, wondering if she could live in a sham of a marriage for the rest of her days.
But what other choice did she have? Where would she go? It wasn't as if Vince was cruel to her – he provided her with everything she needed, well, all the material things anyway – cars, clothes, jewelry, someone who did all the housework for her – Linda didn't have to lift a finger. But on the inside Linda was aching – aching for someone to hold her, to want her, to love her for whom she was. She realized with a deep pang that it would never happen while she was still with Vince, he couldn't love her anymore, and he had distanced himself from her for too long now. She wondered if he would ever find it in himself to love anyone again, the way he used to love her.
In the days before the steroid trial, he had loved her fiercely, protected her and wanted her with a passion that was so intense, it sometimes scared her. He used to say he would die without her, that he could never be with anyone else, and that passion frightened her. Now she would have done anything for him to have that same intensity again. But her gut feeling told her he never would, not for anybody.
She sat on the park bench, watching Ruckus running around, chasing the birds, marveling at them. How they flew off, just as Ruckus was about to pounce. If only life were that simple, she thought to herself, if only I could fly off whenever I wanted, and not have to worry about the mess I would leave behind. She often thought of leaving Vince, he just wasn't the same man anymore, and hadn't been ever since the early ninety's when the steroid trial had taken place.
She had tried hundreds of times to lift him out of the depression he had been in, but to no avail. It was as if he had cut himself off from everyone, the people and the places he loved, and just surrounded himself with his work. Even the children had noticed it, they had tried too but not even they could do anything. From the outside looking in, it was though Vince and Linda were the perfect couple, always smiling, always teasing in the way that married couples do. No one would have known that behind the scenes they barely spoke to one another, they hadn't touched each other in years. Vince was a workaholic who lived for his work and Linda was despairing, wondering if she could live in a sham of a marriage for the rest of her days.
But what other choice did she have? Where would she go? It wasn't as if Vince was cruel to her – he provided her with everything she needed, well, all the material things anyway – cars, clothes, jewelry, someone who did all the housework for her – Linda didn't have to lift a finger. But on the inside Linda was aching – aching for someone to hold her, to want her, to love her for whom she was. She realized with a deep pang that it would never happen while she was still with Vince, he couldn't love her anymore, and he had distanced himself from her for too long now. She wondered if he would ever find it in himself to love anyone again, the way he used to love her.
In the days before the steroid trial, he had loved her fiercely, protected her and wanted her with a passion that was so intense, it sometimes scared her. He used to say he would die without her, that he could never be with anyone else, and that passion frightened her. Now she would have done anything for him to have that same intensity again. But her gut feeling told her he never would, not for anybody.