"Cue song and Incest"

by Jeanne Kathleen Reuel

Disclaimer: The McKinleys and the song lullaby belong to Richard O'Brien. The personality of Eve and the title are courtesy of my friend Erin. (she introduced me to Shock Treatment as well, something I'm sure she now regrets doing, especially since I still haven't given her the video back yet...) but the plot and Kate belong to me.

"I feel the heat from your skin and the stubble on your chin, you're no good
You're no good
You've got dirt on your hands And everybody understands You're no good
You're no good
Oh what a joke
What a joke
You feel like choking You play for broke
You play for broke
He'll leave you smoking
Oh, romance is not a children's game
But you keep going back. Its driving you insane"

I came from one of those families that is always together. All five of us made it a priority to eat dinner together every evening. It was kind of cute, really, my mother, my father, my older brother Cosmo, me—I'm Nation—and our little sister Kate. Even when my brother started medical school, he lived at our house.

Aside from my sister Kate, I had very few friends. The one girl I probably talked to the most was Eve. She was a sweet girl, with a bubbly personality and curly hair. My parents monitored my friends very closely, but they approved of her because her mom knew my mom.

As far as boys went, my parents were very strict. I hardly knew nay boys, never mind hanging out with any. But by the time I was 17, I really wanted a boyfriend, so like all kids with strict parents, I had to find a boyfriend. I found a very creative way around the rules.

I dated my brother.

I know that sound like it would be really gross, but it wasn't. He is a sweet, sweet guy. And when dating your family, it is so nice, there is such a bond there, because it is more than just one level of love. It is like being so deeply connected to someone on so many levels, it is beautiful.

We had to keep it quiet, of course, this was England, not Arkansas. Having an incestuous relationship with a minor would have gotten my lovely brother thrown in jail. Cosmo was a quiet person to begin with; he'd have no problem not telling anyone about us. I, on the other hand, liked to talk.

I slipped up to Eve once. We were in health class, talking about pregnancy. Not really a concern of hers, as she was a very clean cut girl.

"It would be absolutely horrid if I got pregnant now," I said, filling out answers on our worksheet.

Eve laughed. "Yeah, your parents never let you leave the house. Who would impregnate you, your brother?" she asked jokingly.

Oh Shit. I blanched and became utterly speechless. Eve saw the look on my face and screwed hp her own in disgust, trying not to let her brain process the possibility that I'd be doing something ever so vile.

"Ew," she said almost in a whiney tone. "You are not sleeping with Cosmo. He's creepy. Tell me you are not sleeping with him"

I turned about five shades of red. "Of- of course not" I tried to laugh it off, but it came out as a weak giggle.

Eve could tell I was lying. She pretended to believe me, but I could tell from the way she buried her face in her hands and mumbled something about how gross the images she had in her head now were that she didn't trust my lie at all.

"You brought it up," I shifted uncomfortably. "Its your own fault if you are disturbed." I got really nervous, really flustered, and I turned back to my own desk and worked on the sheet. Truth be told, there was very little chance that I would become pregnant. We were not stupid kids, we didn't actually have lots of sex. Yes, we did fool around a lot, but we didn't want an inbred child. That would be bad. He respected me more than to do that to me. He loved me.

It happened again, the whole 'another person finding out' thing. This was bout 6 months later, and it was ever so much worse. Mom and Dad were gone for the weekend, and Kate, now 14, was over at a friend's house. Cosmo was 21, I was 17, we were home alone, and I'll leave the rest of the scene up to interpretation. Neither of us had much by way of clothing on. I still had a bra on and (partly) my jeans, and Cosmo still had pants on. The front door opened, but neither of us noticed. Kate ambled into the living room. Her mouth dropped opened and she screamed.

"Kate, Kate, shh, shh" I said, scrambling to my feet and clamping a hand on her mouth. I zipped my pants back up and turned her toward me, away from Cosmo, trying to distract her from the scene. "I thought you were staying over Melissa's house ....having sex?" she asked, unable to form complete sentences.

"Well..."I began, trying to be delicate. "You can't tell mom and dad, honey, please!" I begged. This was ridiculous.

"You were, weren't you?" she collapsed onto the couch and began dry heaving. "And you wanted to? I can see if he was making you do it...but this...this is so gross!" She buried her face in her hands.

Cosmo was pulling his belt back on, lurking in a corner, leaving me to deal with our baby sister, who was so disgusted by us that she could not even look at me. I stroked her hair gingerly, and her head snapped up, her flaming eyes boring holes through me.

"You know, Nation, I expected you to have a boy over. I really did, I know our parents our strict. But I never thought..." she trailed off, glancing at Cosmo, still trying to wrap her mind around the situation. She stood. "I am going to go think of what to do about this. I'll see you in the morning," she walked upstairs.

Cosmo picked his shirt up off the ground, but didn't put it on. He sat in a chair across from me and we just looked at each other for several minutes.

"Get on the phone. We're going to have Kate committed"

Cosmo told the people from the hospital that Kate had come home, shouting accusations at us. Saying that she caught us having sex when we were just watching TV. I felt bad about having Kate shipped off for a month, but she probably was traumatized anyway. She never did tell out parents. Maybe she actually did think she was crazy.

I went on to graduate and I was accepted to the same medical school Cosmo was attending. Cosmo and I moved out, into our own place. Our parents were thrilled with the tight family bonds they had created, that was exhibited in our decision to stick together. But Kate, right before Cosmo and I left confessed that she knew exactly what had been and was going on with Cosmo and I.

"I kept your secret for two years" she hissed at me. "But now, I never want to see you again." She then turned and went into her house, and kept her promise not to see me again. She lived a long healthy life, but I never did see her again.

I got kicked out of medical school in my third year. I wasn't "upholding our school's prestigious standards". In layman's terms, I flunked out. So Cosmo and I used our knowledge on a television show, under the guidance of the German born Burt Schnick. Burt was a nice, suave guy and I grew to like him. A lot.

Cosmo didn't like that one bit. He was very possessive of me and got sort of mad when he thought I might be interested in Bert. And I guess I did like Bert. He was sweet to me, and I didn't have to hide my affection for him, like I had to with Cosmo. It was nice to have something that I didn't have to hide, didn't have to keep to myself.

And Bert trusted me. I was one of the few people who knew that he was not blind; he just pretended to be for the press. Knowing that made me feel sort of special, like I was in on something. Bert always made me feel really special inside. It was not hard for him to convince me to move to the United Stated with him, to start a new show in an up-and-coming town called Denton. Cosmo went too, and my brother and I starred in a show called Dentonvale. We played doctors at a mental hospital, and I finally got to use some of the knowledge I gained in the medical school I failed out of. It was fun; I got to administer a lot of pills.

Cosmo and I still had really hot sex a lot. Even after all of the tribulation in our lives, we never lost sight of the fact that family is important.