No One Really Knows Me

No one really knows me.

Not even my closest friend.

I don't where to go,

But it doesn't matter in the end.

It's true they don't know me. No one does. I don't know why I stay here. Then again, I don't where to go, so it's not like it really matters anyway. The end result will always be the same.

I'm always alone,

So I can go where I please.

Anywhere I can hide

From the people who tease.

My so-called friends are constantly with me, but at the same time, I'm alone. They don't know what I'm feeling. Even with you I'm alone. This loneliness, this detachment I feel from the world, allows me to go anywhere. I really don't care about whether or not I break the rules anymore. I find the most convenient places to hide from all the people who torment me.

So I continually ask myself:

What matters anymore?

And what do I care?

No one really knows me,

And nothing is really there.

It's very true. Nothing matters to me anymore, nothing at all. No, not even you. I really don't care, all because nothing matters to me. But if someone knew me then maybe I could care. Why I should care though, is beyond me. Everything we perceive to be real is usually a lie, a falsehood to lead us into a breakable sense of security.

Why am I trying so hard?

What do I think I'll achieve?

My efforts are pointless,

The praise I want I'll never receive.

They all tell me to try my hardest; they don't expect me to give more then that. But why? Why should I try my hardest if I can't get the things I want? All of my efforts won't bring people back. They always find something wrong with the way I handle things anyway.

Can't I forget everything?

No longer care?

Just stop trying?

I never get anywhere.

Tell me why I bother.

Give me a reason to fight.

There's nothing for me

In the darkest hour of the night.

Why don't you answer?

Why don't you look at me?

Your grey eyes slid away from my green ones. It doesn't really surprise me that you are being so evasive. You never answer my questions, no matter what the topic. Even if you did answer me, it'd probably be a lie, wouldn't it? So you try to push away my troublesome thoughts by touching your lips to mine. It's worked for you before, but not this time. This time, I'm going to get answers, no matter what the cost. Then I realize why you don't answer me.

You thought I knew,

But now you see.

I'm as confused as everyone else.

And I don't know what to do.

I have lost myself in this mess.

You'd've gotten lost too.

Anyone who's involved with me gets lost eventually, but they usually go back to the way they were before. I bet you'll go back to your ways after this is over. But if you were me, then you would realize that it's nearly impossible for me to go back. This will haunt me for the rest of my life.

When will this be over?

It has to end.

When it's finished,

My soul can mend.

Then I will be

Who I was before.

And I will not

Need you anymore.

I won't go back to the way I was, no, but things will get better. The only way I can say that with confidence is because I know things can't get any worse. And I can pretend to be the careless boy I used to be, until the time has taken away this burden I'm forced to shoulder. And when that time comes, I'll forget you. I won't need you, or your love. I'll live a normal life, leaving you to pick up the broken pieces.

So Draco, listen well and answer me, or you'll regret it.

What I need to know

Before this is done.

Tell me the answer

Before you run.

Can't I forget everything?

No longer care?

Just stop trying

And finally get somewhere?