Chapter four

Suddenly there was a sharp knock at the bathroom door. Artemis jumped up, but slipped on a towel that had been lying on the floor and fell face first onto the hard bathroom tiles.

"Artemis? Artemis are you in there?" asked Butler. He almost sounded nervous. Artemis quickly got up to check his reflection in the mirror. His nose was bleeding and his cheek was starting to bruise.

"Yes Butler." He said.

"Oh good," the man servant sighed. "Stand back, I'm going to break down the door."

"What!?!" Luckily Artemis did move as the door came crashing down, but gave the Body gaurd a skeptical look. "Butler? Was that nessacary? You do have a set of keys for every room in this house you know."

Butler stood dumbfounded. "OH MY GOD! Artemis! What did that elf do to you?!?"

"Oh, nothing Butler I-"

"I can't believe that I trusted her with you! Come on, I'm going to show her what happens to people who mess with the Butlers!"

"No, Butler you don't understand. Holly didn't-"

"What do you think I should do to her?" asked Butler enthusiastically. "Hurt her pride, hurt her phisically or both? I'm opting for pride-"

"Butler! Be quiet and listen to me!" and then added "This Christmas is having the oddest effect on everybody..."

"Oh, sorry." Said Butler, straightening up, and staring at Artemis Fowl.

"Okay, here's what happened. Holly locked me in the bathroom, and when you knocked I...well...this happened." He pointed to his face. He wasn't about to admit that he'd slipped on a stupid towel and landed face first on the floor.

"How-?" began the body guard,

"It doesn't matter. Now where did you put Holly? I trust that you didn't let her get passed?" He said to change the subject.

Butler's gaze fell to the floor, guiltily.

Holly frowned. She was in a box staring at...nothing. In fact none of these boxes contained anything at all! Not even goblins. The puppy watched with fascination as Holly tore another decorative bow to shreds out of frustration. What was worse was that Foaly now refused to speak with her, and Mulch Diggums, her "Trust worthy" partner, had disappeared.

"D'arvit!" she muttered, as she carefully stepped out of the box. She then slid down the enormous pile of "Stuff" and sat with the puppy to think a while.

"Where could those goblins be?" she asked Cuddles. His tongue plopped out of his mouth and he gave her something that looked suspiciously like a shrug. Holly wasn't sure if it was normal for puppies to shrug, so she took a step back...just in case. "Well, I suppose not, but then you probably have a good nose. Do you know what a goblin smells like?" she asked in a cutsy voice.

D'arvit! She thought, First Butler and now me! Oh well, he is cute." She then scratched the dog behind what she suspected were it's ears, and gave it a ribbon to play with.

"I cannot believe you! Of all the things to do Butler, really. Now we get nothing and SHE has the goblins!" Artemis was fuming as he held a towel to his nose, something that was very unusual for him to do.

"Sorry sir." Said Butler obediently. He suspected that calling Artemis "Sir" was probably a smart idea for now. They were climbing up the stairs (The elevator seemed to be out of order) and were approaching the attic. "Just up these stairs sir."

Artemis sighed. "More stairs?" Butler nodded.

"She's in the attic sir."

"I know that Butler. This had better be worth my time." Butler resisted the urge to gulp. Artemis seemed very angry. They climbed the rest of the stairs silently and reached the door. Butler opened it and found Holly peering over the side of a box and...and...

"Damn! She's already got the goblins, Butler, seize her!"

"No," said Butler. "I think that she's...uh...singing to the puppy sir."

Sure enough, Holly was singing something that sounded remarkably like "Rock-a-bye baby". She had not noticed the door open at all.

"Rock-a-bye puppy, la la la la, you are sooo cute, and uh...la la la la. I think that you're the cutest puppy alive-"

"Captain Short!" Artemis said, disgusted by what he was seeing.

"D'arvit!!!" she exclaimed as she turned to see Artemis and Butler staring at her. "Um...I, It's not what it looks like...I mean, Bad puppy! I hate you, you furry little, no good...bad puppy!... I mean dog! I mean thing!" She finished, pointing an accusing finger at Cuddles. Artemis was at a loss for words. He'd written a number of witty come backs for nearly every situation, but he had never expected to be seeing Holly Short, singing lullabies to a puppy!

Butler also seemed to be having the same dilemma, because he kept on opening his mouth and then shutting it again.

Well, at least Foaly didn't hear me. Thought Holly, until...

"Guffaw, guffaw, guffaw!" came a noise from her helmet which was lying in a box. It was Foaly. "Who'd have thought," he sang "Captain Holly Short, LEPrecon officer, member of the infamous gang that brought down the B'wa kell, able to escape from the most dangerous mudboy on earth, helper in bringing down Jon Spiro and-"

"FOALY!" Interrupted Holly, turning red. "Stop it!!!" There was more laughing.

"And why would I do that? This is very funny. So funny in fact that I think that the guys would probably love to hear it."

"Fine!" shouted Holly "Ten presents if you keep this quiet!" But Foaly wasn't done yet.

"Hmm, well it's tempting Holly, but the look on Beetroot's face would be priceless..."

"TWENTY!" begged Holly.

"I don't know, I mean the way you treated me earlier was kind of mean..."

"Mean?!?" gasped Holly, "You do it to me all of the time- oh! Fine twenty five!"

She could hear Foaly munching on a carrot as he thought this through.

"Well?" she asked. The munching stopped,

"Well, I also want one present directly from you." He said "And wrapped as well, with plenty of ribbons and bows and stuff."

Holly gritted her teeth. "Okay...do we have a deal?" more munching.

"FOALY! Do we have a deal or not!?!"

"All right Holly, it's a deal. But just remember that I could've asked for all of your presents, but I didn't, meaning that from this day forth you must buy me a gift every Christmas." He said smugly. Holly bit her lip. "Fine Foaly." She sighed.

Artemis and Butler were still just standing there. Fowl was deep in thought. Holly knew that he was trying to work this to his advantage. Butler was so shocked that he didn't even notice the puppy nibbling at his shoes. Holly decided that it would be best to simply ignore them, and went on searching for the goblins. It would've been easier had she just used her helmet, but she decided to turn it off instead. Foaly had caused enough trouble as it was. After fifteen minutes or so, Artemis gave a cough signaling that he wanted to say something.

"What?!?" asked Holly irritably, kicking another box out of her way. Artemis wished that she'd pay attention.

"So, Holly. Have you found the goblins yet?" He asked hopefully. She turned her fiery gaze towards him.

"Does it look like I've found the goblins Fowl?" She asked, through gritted teeth.

"Oh, well in that case Butler and I shall be going to bed...and I'll just take the puppy for now, so he doesn't get in the way."

Holly put her hands on her hips. "Okay, what are you up to?" she asked. "Since when do you go to bed when there are faeries searching through your house, and your parents might find out?"

"Its my parents, Holly," Artemis replied in a bored tone, "If you want them getting suspicious by all means, lets stay up, but if not, then I'm afraid that I will simply have to go to bed. I trust you enough to take care of everything, and remember, no mind wiping while I'm asleep or I won't remember to get your presents."

Holly nearly slapped herself as Artemis left. Of course she'd been meaning to mind wipe him when this was through, but what was she going to do now!?! She quickly retrieved the helmet.

"Foaly!" she said urgently. "Foaly we have a situ- Foaly? Are you there?"

No he wasn't there, and Holly had a suspicious feeling that he was announcing everything to the LEP.

"Darv'it!" she exclaimed. This was going to haunt her for the rest of her life, she just knew it! Oh well, there was no time to lose. She quickly adjusted the helmet and tried to activate the tracking device. After several minutes she was still trying.

"Stupid paranoid donkey." She mumbled, and then threw the helmet to the floor. This had to be the most unprofessional mission she'd ever been on! This also meant that she'd have to search for those damn goblins the old fashion way, by tricking the little beasts. Of course, tricking a goblin isn't the hardest thing to do, but tricking a few, that you can't find, in a big house...She sighed. Maybe Mulch could help her, but where was he? In fact, now that she thought about it, she hadn't seen him since they'd found the presents!

Holly decided that she could track the goblins down without her assistant's help and ran out of the door and to the stairs. She looked at the stairs doubtfully. It would take her ages to get down them. By that time it could already be morning before she caught them.

"Artemis, remind me why we're going to sleep when there are goblins running around the house?" said Butler. Artemis gave a discouraged sigh. "Butler! We have the goblins! They're right here!" he snapped, holding up the puppy, whose eyes were bulging because of how tight Artemis was holding it.

"But Holly said-"Began Butler, looking flustered. "Well, Holly said that she'd found the goblins earlier, you know, when she had her present craze. And we were holding the puppy at the time. I mean, I know I'm not the evil- I mean, criminal mastermind here, but I don't think that the goblins are hiding in the puppy." He finished. Artemis looked at his wits end.

"Butler! Holly was crazed at the time! She didn't see anything! And, we aren't going to sleep for your information. We're going to watch the surveilance cameras! Who knows what Holly could do to the house?!? And, did you just call me evil?" He asked, glaring at the manservant. Butler shrugged, not because he didn't know, but because he wanted to avoid the question.

"Lets get down to the surviellance room then." Said Artemis. They stepped into the elevator and Butler pressed the "Down" button. The elevator ride was silent. And finally they heard the "Ding" sound that announced there arrival at the first floor. Cautiously they crept into the survielance room and searched for holly's whereabouts. Artemis gaped as he saw Holly throw the helmet to the floor and stomp out of the attic.

"Butler!" he said, in what would've been a frantic voice had Artemis been able to show that kind of emotion. "She's not shielded! Why the hell isn't she shielded?!? If my parents find her..."

"Shhh." Said Butler putting a finger to his lips. Artemis returned his attention to the screen, and watched Holly stare down at the long flight of stairs. Then she-

"NOOOO!" cried Artemis, staring in disbelief at the screen.