Through the Linen Closet

Spike was swearing, loudly and at length. "Whoever put a bloody portal inside somebody's house?" he fumed. He looked at Lindsey. "Rightful owner alive and well, I presume?"

"Last that I saw," Lindsey replied. To be honest, he hadn't really thought of it either. But it was now obvious that there needed to be a change of plan. As things stood, neither Spike nor Angel could enter, and Lindsey was pretty sure they were going to need them to deal with Santa. "What now?"

"Now." Spike turned to look Lindsey in the eye. "You are going to think of some way to either get that bloody, wife-stealing sod to invite me in, or you're going to kill him so I don't need the invite."

Lindsey scrutinized Spike carefully, the gears almost audibly turning. "There might be another way," he said slowly. "The old man has mentioned you by name a few times. You don't suppose..,"

"What?" Spike now looked at Lindsey as if he were an utter moron. "Oh, come right in and get your wife, Spike. Sorry about nabbing the kids and trying to sacrifice her to a demon and all that. Are you sure you wouldn't like a cup of tea while you're tearing the place apart?" His expression became almost pitying. "He did have my kids. He does have my wife. Did you think we were going to have civilized negotiations on the subject?" He cuffed the back of Lindsey's head, albeit fairly gently. It only felt to Lindsey like his eyeballs were about to pop out. "We're the bloody monsters, mate. We don't work like that."

"You're not a thing like Angel, are you?" Lindsey asked, rubbing the back of his head.

Spike laughed with genuine good humor. "You keep talking like that, lawyer boy, and I many have to let you get out of this mess alive."

&&&&&&&

Santa was ostensibly busy, his nose buried in a spell book. This left Richard and Rose, for the most part, on their own.

Rose never thought she'd actually miss the nasty, old pestilence demon's presence, but she was suddenly finding that there was something good that could be said for it.

That something would be, to Rose's mind, being a chaperone.

"I've been ever so patient with you, Lily," Richard murmured, closing the bit of distance that Rose had taken care to put between them. "But a man has his needs."

"Richard, if you think I'm going to have sex with you in front of your father, you're out of your mind," Rose answered, a bit shakily, edging away from him again. Of course, it was her considered opinion that Richard was already out of his mind. But then, he didn't know that.

"I didn't plan to ravish you right here, hon," Richard replied slowly. Something about her speech didn't ring true for him, and he finally put his finger on it. Shouldn't she have said 'make love,' rather than 'have sex?'

"Richard," Rose began in as calming a tone as she could manage. "Maybe if we went back home..," She let the sentence trail off suggestively. She had no intention whatsoever of letting Richard do anything with, or to, her. But it might be worth letting him think that she would if it could persuade him to take her back through that portal. Then, she'd see just what kind of a challenge he was for the skills that Angel had been teaching her for the past year and then some.

But she wasn't about to tackle Santa on her own.

Richard shrugged. "Dad wants us here right now," he said. "So, we'll stay. But that doesn't mean we couldn't have a little cuddle. And maybe some low-key making out."

"I'm not in the mood," Rose murmured, reflecting that that at least was the unvarnished truth. "Really, Richard, it's been a rather stressful day."

Richard's light brown eyes seemed to darken, and eerie lights drifted through them. "I suppose you're going to tell me that you have a headache now," he snarled. Rose wasn't entirely sure, but she could almost swear that his teeth were becoming sharper, or maybe, she hoped, it was just an illusion brought on by nerves. Richard was seriously creeping her out.

Rose fidgeted, wondering what she could do to placate this madman without actually acceding to his requests. As she moved, she heard a faint crinkly sound, a muted rattle, and immediately identified it. She had come here fully expecting that this was to be her last night on earth, and she had wanted some reminder of why she was doing it all when she went. Blushing furiously, for Richard never took his crazed stare from her, Rose extracted the photograph from its hiding place. It might not be the best or safest method of jarring Richard's memory, but right now, it was all she had. And she had to back him off. She soothed her conscience with the thought that he'd freely embraced evil to further his own ambitions, and no one would blame her if what she did drove him even further into madness.

"May I show you something, Richard?" Quietly, even tentatively. Rose was more terrified now than when she had been dead certain that she was going to be eaten by a demon. Her inner reserves were wearing fine, and all Rose wanted to do was to go home and cuddle with Spike and the children.

"What exactly were you hiding there, Lily?" Richard leered at her, but didn't look entirely pleased, as though he suspected that she was up to something. Something that he wouldn't like.

"It's a picture," Rose answered softly. "It's of me, and my husband, Spike, and our children, Alaric and Ariel. My real family, Richard. I'm not your wife and I never was."

"You lie!" Richard roared, batting the photo out of her hand without even looking at it. "Why are you lying to me, Lily? Are you trying to make me angry with you?" The lights in his eyes glowed malevolently, and off in his corner, Santa nodded in satisfaction. It looked like the demon blood ran true after all.

"My name is Rose," Rose said desperately, tears of fear running down her cheeks as she tried to keep some solid object, table, chair, whatever, between them. "Please believe me, Richard. I'm not trying to hurt you. But I'm not lying."

From across the room, the old man spoke up. "Would you like me to cast a spell on her to make her a good, dutiful wife, my boy? It wouldn't be any trouble."

"No, thank you, sir," Richard answered distractedly. He swatted the table that separated him from Rose aside as though it were made of toothpicks. "I believe in keeping these things between a husband and his wife." He frowned. "Lily, I believe that I spoke to you about crying. You're ruining your make-up again."

&&&&&&

The helicopter landed with blatant disregard for whatever laws there might be, in the middle of the street in front of Richard's house.

Angel was the first one to alight. "Please tell me that the house doesn't belong to..,"

"Richard McDaniels," Gunn supplied as he stepped out of the aircraft. "And the portal's there?" He turned to Corinna.

Corinna nodded. "In the hall closet," she affirmed. She looked at Angel and realized why everyone was frowning. "Does it have to be the actual owner, or can it be anyone who resides there?"

Angel, catching her drift, started to smile. "Why don't we find out?" he suggested, holding out his hand to her. "Oz? You want to find Spike and tell him that we may have a way in? He's probably prowling around the house trying to come up with a plan."

"Will do," Oz agreed. His nose twitched, and he nodded at Angel and melted into the shadows.

"Do you think Lindsey is still hanging around?" Fred asked, eyes flicking back and forth, as though she was looking for him, and perhaps she was.

"I'm still not sure what he's up to," Gunn mused. "It wouldn't be the first time he's switched sides, but the thing is, you never know when he's going to jump back to the other side again."

"I'm not jumping anywhere at the moment." Lindsey's voice came faintly from somewhere nearby.

Angels' ears identified the source of the sound. He strode over to the parked car and unceremoniously forced the trunk lid open to reveal Lindsey, curled up in a ball.

"You know," Lindsey remarked, slowly uncurling himself from his cramped quarters, with difficulty. "A week ago, I would have said that you couldn't put an adult human being in the trunk of a sports car. I guess that shows what I know."

"Or maybe that you're neither an adult nor a human being," Fred muttered in a not completely muffled aside.

Impatient with Lindsey's slow movements, and, because he just didn't like him, Angel grabbed Lindsey's arm and hauled him to his feet, then marched him over to join the rest of the group.

"I see that Spike doesn't trust you either," Gunn observed. "Imagine that."

"Yeah, imagine that." Lindsey rubbed the back of his neck, stiff from his sojourn in the trunk. Association with Spike was proving to be a physical trial to him. "And I was even behaving myself."

Corinna started to open her mouth to say something when they heard the sounds of arguing.

"It would have worked," Spike insisted. "The portal would still be there even if the house was gone, then I wouldn't need an invite." He made a half-hearted grab for something that Oz held.

"And we would have had to wait until the fire was finished burning," Oz pointed out. "Not to mention that we've attracted enough attention with the helicopter. I don't think we need to draw any more notice to ourselves. Like the fire department and the police." He tossed something up in the air and caught it again. Something that had a metallic glint to it.

"It's not my fault you gits did everything but hire a brass band," Spike grumbled, deliberately missing the point, and making a good job of it too. The next time Oz tossed his lighter in the air, he snatched it away, but all he did with it was put it safely away in his pocket.

Angel just shook his head, trying to suppress a grin. Some things never changed. But first things first, and what was first on the agenda was rescuing Rose. He realized he was still holding Corinna's hand. He turned to look at her. "Shall we give it a try?"

She gave him a warmer smile than she might have done if anyone was looking. "Why don't we?"

&&&&&&

Neither Lorne, nor Wes, nor the Q'xlzr demon, which had decided to hang around until it was sure that Rose was okay, could come up with anything to distract the twins attention from the situation at hand. Of course their mass case of fidgets probably weren't helping matters either.

"Would you like to..," Lorne began.

"No, thank you," Ariel interrupted as politely as she could.

"Well how about..," Wes started, then cut himself off as he found himself on the receiving end of a pair of looks that were an admixture of disdain and pity.

"Don't think so," Alaric mumbled. What with one thing and another, the twins hadn't had much leisure to take note of little details. "I smell blood." All right, for a vampire, it was a pretty big detail, but the stress and adrenalin had been running high.

"Where?" Wesley demanded immediately. Since none of them were injured that he knew of, then it could mean all sorts of things, none of them good.

"Her." The little boy indicated his sister. "But it's not her blood."

"You're sure?" Lorne asked, then mentally kicked himself. The twins were normal enough kids to have acquired the standard cuts and scrapes that any kid got. Of course Alaric knew what his sister's blood smelled like.

Ariel turned around, and across the back of her shirt was a drying stain.

"Well, if that's not Ariel's blood," Wesley remarked. "It must be Corinna's. She must have sustained some damage when she was fighting Hramaas."

"Big spider blood?" the Q'xlzr asked anxiously. It scrutinized Ariel's back carefully. "Not being hurt?"

"I'm not hurt," Ariel assured the little demon. Of all the adults that surrounded them, the blue gray demon was easily the most protective, which considering how protective everyone was of them was saying something.

"Will you do me a favor, my dear?" Wesley asked his goddaughter. "Please go change, and save that shirt for Fred to analyze."

"Okay." Wes looked askance at her as she headed for the kitchen rather than her bedroom.

"What are you doing, Ariel?" the Watcher inquired.

"I'm getting a plastic bag, Uncle Wes," she explained patiently. "You know, so it won't get contaminated."

Alaric shrugged. "It probably is already," he commented. "But I'm sure Aunt Fred will still be interested in it."

Wesley was trying to make himself look smaller for missing the blatantly obvious. All right, so it wasn't his field, but having seven year olds get the better of him like that..,

"Get over it, Wes," Lorne advised. "It's not like you're a special case or anything. They do it to everyone." He ruffled his godson's hair and frowned when Alaric didn't protest. "They weren't trying to give you attitude or anything. They're just that smart."

On an intellectual level, Wesley knew this. But every once in a while, human nature would come to the fore and make the twin's mental acuity a bitter pill for him to swallow.

He wondered if Ariel had been reading his mind and picking up on his mood when she emerged from her room wearing something very little girlish and immediately climbed into his lap.

"Everyone makes mistakes, Uncle Wes, it's okay." She snuggled into him, feeling a need for comfort herself. "Aunt Fred will love you no matter what. So will I."

Wesley cuddled her back, and once more the thought niggled in the back of his head as to whether or not he and Fred ought to reconsider the subject of children. He hoped that everyone would be back soon. With Rose. "I love you too, Ariel."

&&&&&&

Corinna walked up to the front door and tried it. Not only did it open easily, unlocked, but no alarms sounded to herald their approach.

"That's weird," Angel muttered. In this day in age, in a city the size of L.A. and in a neighborhood like this, locked doors and burglar alarms were almost mandatory. "Go on in, Corinna. You don't need to go farther than just over the threshold. Then try it. Don't go in any further alone."

"All right," Corinna murmured nervously. Now that she was so close, fear was beginning to be the prevalent emotion. "Come in, Angel."

Angel set a tentative foot next to the doorway and cautiously slid it forward, and met with no resistance. So far, so good. "Hurry," he said urgently. "Invite Spike in too. While our luck still holds."

The rest of the group had made its way up the front walk to the house and had almost reached them when Angel stepped fully inside. When Spike saw that, he shoved his way to the front of the pack and was at the door almost before Corinna had time to issue her invitation.

There were a few moments of milling around in Richard's living room, making sure that everyone had some kind of weapon, and determining their order of entry.

They lined up in front of the closet door. Corinna opened it to reveal the shimmering distortion of the portal.

They were ready.

&&&&&&&

Rose stopped backing away from Richard. Not because he stopped advancing on her, but because she was back up against a wall. There was nowhere else for her to go.

"Why are you running away from me, Lily?" Richard asked calmly enough. Only those lights in his eyes were there to proclaim that something was terribly wrong.

"I'm not running anywhere, Richard," Rose replied shakily. Which was, of course, the absolute truth. She hadn't been running, merely evading.

Richard frowned while he worked it out as best he could. He didn't stop moving though. Soon, he had Rose pinned against the wall.

"That's better," he murmured. "I don't know why you insist on playing these games, Lily. Is it because you like to be chased?"

"Why don't we go out tonight, Richard?" Rose asked brightly, seized by a sudden inspiration. Anything, well, almost anything, to get him to take her back through that portal. "We could go dancing, maybe."

"You'd like that, hmm?" Richard pulled her into his arms as if he were going to start dancing with her right there. Then, an image flashed through his mind, seeing her dancing with someone else. Her lovely face lit up with a smile as seen past a bleached blond head and leather-clad shoulders. "Oh no you don't, Lily. Do you think I'm going to let you dance with someone else and leave me again?" He held her so tightly that Rose gave an involuntary squeak of protest. "You're mine, Lily. No one else can have you."

Rose decided that enough was enough. She was going to have to try to fight her way out of this one. She looked up into Richard's mad, mad eyes, smile up at him and drove her knee up sharply into his groin.

Richard's reaction was gratifying to one who had never been involved in a physical confrontation before. With a strangled sound, he crumpled to the floor, holding the injured area, face contorted in pain.

Unfortunately, and Rose knew this, Richard was actually the least of her worries. There was still the matter of Santa to be dealt with, and Rose didn't think he'd be anywhere near as gullible, or as vulnerable as Richard. She turned to survey her surroundings and get her bearings, and found herself eye to eye with Santa.

"Going somewhere, my dear?" the old man inquired, smiling genially at her. The lights were dancing in his eyes too.

&&&&&&

"Good for you, mummy," Ariel said suddenly. She and her twin had been taking turns keeping tabs on their mother.

Alaric immediately joined in the mental rapport. But instead of the unstinting admiration that characterized his sister's features, his expression held overtones of horror.

"What happened?" Lorne was on the sofa with Alaric beside him, while Ariel still nestled in Wesley's lap. They had given up on trying to entertain the children after it had been made plain that they didn't wish to be entertained. Or distracted.

"That had to hurt," Alaric muttered. He still wasn't entirely there, but not completely with Rose either. More sort of straddling either side of the metaphysical abyss.

"That's what daddy told me you're supposed to do when someone gets fresh," Ariel announced. "I can see why, too. It really works."

Both Lorne and Wesley started to open their mouths to ask what was going on when the truth hit home. They both winced. No wonder Alaric had reacted differently than his sister had.

"Er, very good," Wesley said as approvingly as he could. It was a difficult concept for a guy to deal with. "Does that mean that Rose is going to be able to get away?"

Alaric shook his head. "Not by herself. That was just Richard, and he's half human."

"And she doesn't think that she can hurt Santa that way," Ariel added. Her little forehead wrinkled a moment. "Why wouldn't it? Daddy said that there isn't much of anything that can stand up to a knee in the balls."

Wesley winced again, not just at the concept, but at how crudely it was put. It sounded particularly incongruous coming from a seven year old girl in frills and ruffles and currently clutching a rather dilapidated pink teddy bear.

Alaric snickered, then immediately sobered up. "They're there," he said excitedly. "They're finally going to rescue her."

Ariel double-checked his information. "They'd better hurry and get through the portal," she said worriedly.

"Because you want your mom back home?" Lorne asked sympathetically.

Alaric shook his head. "Because Santa's getting mad," he answered.