A Failure's Tale - Chapter Fourteen

Sometimes I really despair

I sat on the side of my bunk, relaxing. I hadn't had much chance to relax as the events of the past few days unfolded. Naturally, I still didn't trust Maria but I suppose for now that she would keep to her word. Besides, I figure if she was going to kill me that she'd do it now or after we've met Parda the Hutt but something told me Maria didn't completely intend to kill me. Something told me that maybe me and Maria could end up as partners on the long term, or so I hoped we would. I needed something to do, some aim in my life. Even if I end up as a mercenary or smuggler at least I'd have some purpose other than "waiting" for Revan.

I scratched my head when I realised what I had thought. I was "waiting" for Revan? I tried not to boggle at myself, if that was even possible. I'd stopped denying that mysterious dream I had of Morgana the other night and began to look beyond it. It was now my only string of hope, the only thing I had to hold onto and I didn't even know why I did so. I can only assume that it was more than just a dream, I really don't want to reiterate this but the dream seemed so real. I felt Morgana, her every touch, her every word. I searched my mind for her face, for once in my life I could remember her face. I let out a relieved sigh, I was at peace.

I stood up and paced about the sleeping quarters. This was Rivu's ship and it was obvious that Rivu and Maria knew each other. Were Maria and Rivu partners? If they were, it would definitely increase my chances although knowing smugglers and knowing Rivu I would probably be referred to as a decrease in profit and too much weight to carry around on the ship. I could just imagine Rivu saying something like "Dump Jaro out the airlock! He's too bloody weighty and we must smuggle more.. We must!" I chuckled softly to myself and imagined myself flying out the airlock only to be greeted with my cigarra packet flying towards me in Rivu's temper. Not that I'd live to see it. But I came to the realisation that if I could laugh about *that* then things were definitely looking up.

I silently rested the weight of my arms on my hips and looked up at the ceiling. I sighed and started to shake my head. I realised that ever since the dream I had of Morgana that I'd started to be more of my ordinary self, started to let myself go a little more. I heard the happy whistling of Rivu outside the quarters and turned my head to look at her. "Hi sis'" I said to her, watching as her eyebrow raised at my greeting.

"Not sister today, Jaro?" She asked me. I smiled at her, letting out a soft chuckle and shaking my head.

"Nah. Not today kiddo." I told her, she began to laugh at my comments.

"Kiddo? 'Kay.. 'Kay brother" Rivu replied to me, laughing all the time. I shifted around a bit and turned to face her completely.

"Where's Maria?" I asked.

"Oh.. She's in the cockpit, she isn't a bad pilot, y'know." Rivu replied to me as she started to walk into the sleeping quarters.

"I gathered that. We haven't crash landed and I'm still alive." I told Rivu, she just gasped at my comments.

"If Maria heard you say that.." I watched as Rivu trailed off and started to shake her head back and forth, her head tails gesturing at me. "You and Maria don't really-"

"Get on? No sister." I interjected her statement with. Rivu nodded at me. "So.. Can I ask you how Dustil is? Have you seen him, Rivu?" I asked her seriously. Again, Rivu nodded in my direction.

"I saw him. He's doing fine.. Their's no need to worry.." Rivu looked around her nervously to make sure Maria wasn't there and then whispered. "Carth." I nodded in her direction and winced slightly at her using my real name, I didn't mind all that much, especially since it was privately.

"I worry about him because he is my son, sister." I told her, she smiled.

"I understand that, brother." She replied to me. I winced at her.

"Damn you woman! Must you always try and beat me with the sister, brother thing?" I said, my brow furrowing in frustration. Rivu nodded mischievously in my direction before sweetly and daintily leaving the sleeping quarters.

What a cute kid.

***

"We'll be entering hyperspace soon." Maria was saying to Rivu as I walked into the cockpit and strapped myself in for the ride. Maria turned and gave me a sharp glare, looking me up and down. I returned the favour, in the exact same manner.

Me and Maria almost hated each other to death.

I watched as Rivu shifted around uncomfortably, embarassed by our exchange in glances. "Should I figure out all the navigation thingyums?" She asked Maria. Maria nodded.

"I can never work those bloody things out." Maria said to Rivu. I stayed silent, watching as Rivu went up to the navigation panel and started to work out the co-ordinates for our next destination. I watched as Rivu flawlessly typed in the correct co-ordinates for Tatooine.

"No welcome, Maria?" I asked her. I watched as she concentrated on the flight and completely ignored me. "Hmmm?" I enquired.

"Leave it out, Jaro." She replied to me, annoyed by my statements. Rivu sat down in the co-pilots seat and I placed a cigarra in my mouth, lighting it. "Give me one." She demanded, I shrugged at her. "I said.. Give me one!" Maria demanded again, I shook my head at her.

"Greet me first." I stated to her, taking a puff on the cigarra. Maria turned to glare at me, her eyes were like daggers and I think she wanted to stab me.. Hard.

"Hello." Maria responded through her teeth, it was good enough for me however. I threw a cigarra in her direction and she caught it perfectly.

"Light up kiddo." I told Maria, leaning back in the chair as she shoved Rivu's ship into hyperspace. I watched as she burst out laughing.

"Kiddo?" She asked me, as she looked at me. I nodded at her and she carried on laughing. I left her in her hysterical state and turned to Rivu.

"Rivu, what is this ship called by the way?" I asked her.

"Er.." Rivu said as she drifted off chomping on some snacks that she left lying about. "Freedom's Fate." She told me, I nodded in her direction. Maria had barely stopped laughing.

"I am older than you imagine, Jaro." She responded.

"But are you wise?" I asked, nodding in her direction triumphantly and taking another puff on my cigarra.

"Wiser than you can imagine." She replied, never daring to turn back and look me in the eye. I began to chuckle softly at her. "Hey.. You're living because I said so, just don't push your luck." Maria added. Rivu just looked nervously back and forth at me and Maria.

"I'm livin' because I got brains, sister." I answered her, having another puff on my cigarra and promptly putting it out.

"Just leave me unsupervised with a weapon that's just casually lying around and we'll see how long you have those brains for." Maria said angrily.

"Oh. I see, we're touchy today. It's.. Uh.." I said, grinning and then blushing at what I was about to say "It's not that time of the MONTH is it?" I asked, blushing away. Maria glared at me and started to walk past me.

"If I didn't agree to spare you, you'd be dead." Maria whispered in my ear, promptly leaving the cockpit.

"Well, that was logically obvious..." I muttered to myself. I watched as Rivu got up from the co-pilots seat and moved to the pilot's seat that Maria had just previously occupied. I got up and moved into the co-pilots seat. I mused to myself, at least I was getting a day off from flying and that never really occured often.

Rivu stared at me and started to giggle softly suddenly. "What now?" I asked, looking in her direction as I thumbed for another cigarra. This time, Rivu reached out and stole it from me, breaking it in half. "HEY! That was my last one, sister!" I exclaimed to her, annoyed that she dare take my cigarra away from me.

"They're bad for you. You can wait for Tatooine can't ya? Oh deary me.. heehee." Rivu replied to me, chuckling away at something.

"Spit it out, sister." I demanded of her, my brow furrowing at her for destroying my last cigarra.

"You and Maria.. You have the hots for her, brother." Rivu said to me in a serious fashion. I glared at her and I let out a soft growl from my voice in anger.

"Don't you dare..." I muttered to her, Rivu started to laugh.

"Or what, Jaro?" Rivu asked winking at me, she began to chuckle again. "I mean.. It can't be that bad, I suppose she's kind of attractive to a male." She added.

I let out a groan and another growl. "Don't even go there, sister." I placed my foot up on one of the plain panels and rubbed my hand through my short hair several times.

"So you don't like her?" Rivu asked me, raising her eyebrow.

"Of COURSE I don't! Listen. Are you.." I took a deep breath, composing myself "Are you crazy, sister?! If she was the last woman in the galaxy I wouldn't even CONSIDER relations of that nature.. With that... That.. bloodthirsty, RAMPANT *RANCOR!*" I yelled at her. I immediately blushed however, realising that I may have caught Maria's attention but fortunately I didn't. Rivu sat there giggling at me mercilessly. "I can't believe you even thought of that!" I added.

"Keep your hair on, brother." Rivu replied. Suddenly their was silence and then Rivu began laughing all over again. "She'd probably break you in half with what you're thinking of doing with her" She said, teasing me again. Suddenly, I wanted to quip at how that would be incredibly hard to do to a man like me, considering my past and all but I decided that Rivu may take this the wrong way. She was half my age after all and I certainly didn't want to sound like I was hitting on her, because it wasn't that way at all. I just held my head in my hands temporarily and grumbled.

"Women..."

"Hey! What's that supposed to mean?" Rivu asked me. I completely ignored her question.

"Sometimes, I really *do* despair."

***

Parda the Hutt examined the Parysidian carefully, a small grin erupted across his face. "Heh heh. You have done well Miss Mortis." He said to Maria, I watched carefully as the Hutt seemed absolutely fascinated with the object. I raised an eyebrow as Maria bowed before the Hutt. "Oh, of course. Your payment." Parda handed Maria the payment of credits and she handed them to me to keep hold of.

"Thankyou, Parda. Is there anything else you wish of me to do?" Maria asked the Hutt. The Hutt looked me up and down, chuckling to himself.

"Who is the human male? He looks sharp." Parda said to Maria. I just looked at the Hutt and stood motionlessly as Maria turned around.

"That's someone that decided to tag along... Unfortunately." Maria replied to Parda. Parda just carried on laughing.

"Well, on your next mission take the human male with you. He looks useful." Parda told Maria. I heard her groan.

"No. I'm not going to take Jaro with me, anywhere. Period." She replied to Parda. I smiled as Parda began to laugh at Maria cruelly.

"You will do as you're told. This mission is simple enough. I want you to collect some overdue payments..." Parda the Hutt muttered to Maria "From Manaan." He added, again, Maria groaned.

"But-" She was interrupted.

"I'm aware of the Selkath and their laws, but you can handle it can't you Miss Mortis? I'm sure the male will help you." Parda told Maria. I chuckled to myself, it was ample opportunity to annoy Maria but it was also going to give me something to do and well, it was also going to ensure that I lived just a *little* bit longer.

I hoped Revan would turn up soon and perhaps slaughter Maria for daring to say she'll kill me.

She would turn up, right?

I hoped..

"Fine.. I'll do it.. But I swear Parda! This is the *only* mission that *he* gets to join on." Maria told the Hutt as she pointed in my direction, angrily. I grinned when Maria turned around, victorious. She didn't like it one bit, she *was* Maria Mortis after all. Parda chuckled happily at the idea of it all. "Bye Parda." Maria said in a mere whisper as she left his grand room in Anchorhead.

On the way out I handed Maria the credits I was looking after. Maria was storming around, completely annoyed by what Parda had told her. "Come on.. It's not that bad Maria." I told her, trying to convince her that I could be beneficial to her.

"You're kidding, right? I swear.. I swear Jaro.. One word to me and I'll kill you." She told me, jogging back to Freedom's Fate in a stroppy fashion.

"Oh yes.." I muttered to myself.

"I *really* DO despair!"

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Sorry about the lack of updates! :).

Vivid Scripts: I'll get around to reading the rest of your story, k?