Disclaimer: I do not own Suikoden, and I never will. All Bow down to Konami.

AN: It's been a long time since I Wrote anything... so forgive me if this is crap, and help me to try and improve in a nice manor...

Surreal Dreams

Prologue

I am the Silver Maiden of Zexen, I am Zexen's pride, within me lies the hope of allot of people, I am an ideal, a hero; both an ideal and a hero I never wanted to be. Even my own knights treat me like a fragile china doll, that could be easily shattered if the wrong thing was said or done. But I am no more than a human being, I live, breathe, cry and bleed like anyone else, so why must I be treated differently? Why must it be I who burns in the spotlight of fame and heroism?

After his death, I began to wonder about Luc, whether his evil plan really was so evil after all. I didn't understand what he meant then when he said we were trapped, but now, within the grasp of this True Rune, I do, now, when it's too late. I took his life away not knowing that he suffered too, and since the ruins collapsed on his body I've felt a regret. The same regret that swallowed me when I took the boy's life back in the Karayan village. I try to convince myself It's stupid, and that he and his followers were all wrong, but I guess that's naive...

When I look in the mirror, I see a troubled look reflected back to me, I feel so alone, and afraid, but what of? The war is over, and peace has swept over this land, yet I continue to feel sorrow and troubled as if the fire of hatred was still looming over me. I have never been truly happy, each smile my mouth curves into is fake. How much longer can I live the lie of a happy person? Does anyone else feel this pain? What do my Knights feel? My head is just a mass of questions...

Chris Lightfellow's thoughts were interrupted by the door creaking open as a gust of wind blew though the open window she was staring out of. She sighed uneasily before pulling the window closed and walking out the door and down the stairs. The house was dark, the butler was probably asleep. Chris still wore her armour, unable to sit at peace, she hadn't bothered to change. Carefully she opened the door and stepped out into the chilly air of the night, she closed the door softly behind her before walking though the garden blooming with flowers of all kinds, but the night prevented her eyes from seeing their vibrant colours.

Only when the darkness crept in and the sky was illuminated by the bright moon could Chris be alone. When everyone else slept peacefully, or retired to the tavern for a drink could she walk freely though the streets. Though sometimes she never wanted to be so alone. Her footsteps echoed though the silence, the rhythmic clink of her armour followed each one. She walked briskly to the port, the livelihood of Viney del Zexay. She could hear the clatter of tankards, laughter and shouts from a nearby tavern. She walked over to the window and peered inside, she could see Borus, Percival and Leo all drinking and laughing happily; how she longed to join them, how she longed to be able to smile like that from the bottom of her heart. She felt so different, and distant from the people there, if she walked in she knew all gazes would avert to her, and she'd be treated like a hero she was not.

Chris heaved a heavy sigh and walked do the harbour's edge, where she could see the moonlight shimmer off the never still water, the wind ruffling her hair gently. She let out another sigh and looked down, she was fed up feeling this way, why couldn't she be as happy as the others in the town? No sooner than she begun to think were her thoughts interrupted by the sound of footsteps. The movement of some drooling fan, no doubt. Chris whirled around to face whoever was approaching.

Upon placing her eyes on the person behind her, she gasped. He was small, he had brown hair, an almost boyish look, but there was no doubting it, the eyes placed on her were those of Luc. They had the same empty, sorrowful gaze, he had the same build, hair, face, everything. Chris shook her head, as if he would just go away like a bad dream. She had seen him die, how could anyone possibly survive a building collapsing on them!? She took a step forward and opened her mouth to speak when he darted off into the shadows. She followed the agile boy though the darkness of the alleyways, almost tripping on her own feet and a few other objects as she done so. Before long she lost the boy in the shadows, how could she have caught up to him being so clumsy anyway. She kicked an empty crate in frustration before heading back out of the dark alleyway, her mind now even more tangled with the unanswerable.

Looking down to the cobblestone she walked on, and away with her thoughts she never heard the tavern door open nor notice the man who stepped out. She collided with his chest and fell backwards, landing flat on her backside. She let out a groan of complaint before a familiar voice rang out, "Oh! I'm terribly sorry!" Chris looked up to who she has just collided with to find it was none other than Borus.

"Lady Chris!" Borus's surprised tone said rather loudly, he held out a hand and helped Chris to her feet, "What are you doing out at this hour milady? Shouldn't you be resting?" he released her hand from his and watched her rub her nose.

Chris blinked a few times and let her hand drop back to her side, "Oh.... I was just taking a walk... things are rather stuffy back at home..."

"I understand, I know how it feels to have burdens, why don't you come inside for a while? Some company may do you good." Borus gestured towards the tavern door.

Chris stood back "N...No, I can't." She shook her head. "I can't stand the kind of publicity I get... "

Borus sighed "Don't worry milady, if you don't want anyone to bother you, just say so, come on in and have a good time instead of standing out here in the cold worrying."

Before she could protest Borus had opened the door to the tavern and led her in. He took her over to the table where he, Leo and Percival were sitting. "Lady Chris has come to join us, mind you manners!" he said to the other two knights before going off and getting a drink for Chris.

"So, why you in here milady, isn't it a bit earthy for your likes?" Percival asked, rather baffled by her appearance.

Chris shook her head, "Not at all, I don't mind it... I was getting lonely at home and walking by myself anyway."

"I know someone here would could solve that for you milady!" Leo gave Percival a playful nudge, Percival's face went slightly red as he punched Leo in the arm. Chris giggled lightly at them, maybe coming into the tavern wasn't so bad after all, and everyone seemed to drunk to be bothered noticing her sitting in the corner with the other knights.

Borus returned soon with some wine for her, and soon she was occupied with laughing at Leo's drunken rants, Percival's witty comments and Borus telling stories about the most idiotic things they'd ever done. After a few short hours of drinking and laughing, Borus walked her home. She stopped at the gates and turned to him, "Thank you... it's been a long time since I had a good time anywhere..."

Borus took her armoured hand and kissed it softly, "It's always a pleasure being in your company milady, there is no need to be thankful." He let go of her hand. Chris smiled lightly at him before turning and going inside. "Sleep well my lady" Borus said before he turned and left, not hearing Chris reply with the word "Goodnight".

Chris went to her room and changed into night clothes immediately and lay down, tired, but happy. She had completely forgotten about the event with the boy by the port, and for now was blissfully unaware of what his appearance meant.