Disclaimer: The Naruto concept is owned by Kishimoto. This specific story, and any original characters contained within, are mine.
The Last Step: I'll show you clown!
***
Previously on The Last Step: Naruto discovered, quite on accident, that he's somehow become the Jounin leader of a rookie team of Genin. How did that happen? And how soon can he fix it?
***
Naruto gaped at the sign on the door. This had to be a mistake. It had to. Naruto couldn't see how it could be anything /but/ a mistake. No way. This just couldn't be happening.
How in the world did Konohamaru expect Naruto, of all people, to find three Genin and somehow, miraculously, forge them into a strong, bonded, team? You needed somebody like Kakashi, or Iruka for that. Hinata could do it. Lee could do it. Hell, Naruto acknowledged. Even that bastard Sasuke would be able to identify the strong and weak points of a team, and know how to fix them.
Naruto couldn't do any of that. He just saw a problem, and somehow, he always managed to fix it. His solution wasn't always the cleanest, or the most elegant. But it tended to work out. How could a team work with that? How could that simple ability lend itself to creating a team out of four ninjas, who probably aren't even any good?
Come to that…/were/ the ninjas on his (shudder) team any good? Naruto read the names again, trying to connect faces.
Nara Shikashi. "Not bad…", Naruto muttered to himself. "He's probably just as lazy as his father, but if he's even half as intelligent, he could be a useful guy to have around. Maybe he'll teach me that neato Kagemane no Jutsu Shikamara knows." Naruto smiled slightly, and shook his head. No way anybody was letting that technique out of the Nara clan, any more than Naruto would teach some random ninja off the street how to do Rasengan. That technique taught to him by the Pervert-Sennin was as close to a Blood technique as anything Naruto had. He'd no more give it up than Sasuke or Hana give up their Sharingan, and he didn't blame them.
The next name also struck a chord of familiarity. Inuzuka Kimiko. Naruto remembered her, too. Quiet girl, he recalled. What was her dog's name? Midomaru, that was is. "If she can use weapons as well as her mother and track as well as her father, she'll be pretty useful, too. I just hope she's not as obnoxious as Kiba is, though". Naruto shuddered slightly. Kiba, while good intentioned, could often be a complete jerk because he just failed to pick up on subtle hints. Just yesterday, Naruto had been /trying/ to have a conversation with Hinata, and Kiba felt the need to inform them that there was a flower. In the woods. "Thank you, Kiba", snickered Naruto, thinking back. "A flower in the woods. Who'da thunk?"
Still. Despite his faults, Kiba was a strong ninja, and any child of his was bound to be useful, somewhere.
The third name, now. "A…bu…ra… Kutsu?" Naruto scratched his head. "Who the hell is that?"
A surly voice answered. "It's me, clown-boy. Nice face paint you got there". Naruto looked at the now open door, and at the Genin leaning against the frame.
"It's not facepaint, /Genin/". The emphasis on the word was obvious. Naruto was pulling his rank, and the privileges it entitled him to. Most notably, respect from Genins. Naruto wasn't about to take any crap from any old kid, not even in his teens, who thought Naruto's fashion choices were ill made. "It's a tattoo. It helps me concentrate. And it freaks out my opponent. And I /like/ it. I got it from a friend of mine. So if it bugs you, then you can beat me in a fight. Then, and only then, will you get to make fun of me".
Naruto leaned close, his voice dripping with sugar. "Until then…" he whispered, "You can keep your lousy opinions to yourself".
The Genin narrowed his eyes, obviously unimpressed. "Fine", he muttered. "Don't see how I'm supposed to learn anything from a clown, though." Naruto smacked him in the head for that one. Other than that, he didn't bother to respond. Naruto felt no need to try and explain exactly why he had red ink outlining his lips, and arrowing around his eyes.
"Um…are you our teacher?" Kimiko asked, quietly. Naruto looked at her for a moment before hopping up on the table in the middle of the room.
"I am, for now, your Jounin instructor. I do no~" He was interrupted by Kutsu again.
"What do you mean, /for now/? Are you ditching us to some other Jounin?" Naruto smiled icily at the boy, waiting for a full ten seconds before responding. Just to spite him; the elder Ninja could see the signs of impatience and boredom in the Genin's eyes. The longer Naruto dragged this out, the more it would bother the annoying child.
"I mean for now, because you still need to pass a test in order to truly become Genin. If the three of you can pass the test, then I'll accept you as my team and I'll train you. If not…" Naruto trailed off and allowed the twelve-year olds to supply what came next. He grinned even wider, now. "That's right. Back to the academy for another year, all three of you."
Kutsu glared defiantly at him. 'That jerk', he thought. "I'll pass your test", he stated coldly. "I'll pass any test you want me to. I have to."
Inwardly, Naruto smiled. Somehow, this kid's determination reminded the Jounin of himself at the same age. Ready to do something, /anything/ to get people to recognize him. He didn't know what this kid's beef with life was, but it must be something pretty important.
"Um…I'll help you", whispered Kimiko. "I don't quite understand what's going on, but Kutsu and I are a team, right? We didn't really talk much in the academy, but….Didn't Hokage-sama say that we should always help out our team members?" She glanced at Shikashi. He was sleeping, it looked like.
Kutsu walked over and pulled the desk out from underneath him. "Wake up, bozo!", he shouted into Shikashi's ear. Slowly, an eye opened.
"You seem pretty annoying, but like the quiet girl said. You're my teammate. It's going to be troublesome, but it's my duty to back you up in something like this." Shikashi closed his eye again, perfectly content in his contorted position on the floor.
Naruto laughed. "Well, at least you've got that part down." Now, he sobered up. "I'll meet the three of you tomorrow at twelve sharp, at the bridge across the river".
Two heads nodded. One head just snored.
Now, Naruto had something a bit more pressing to do.
***
"I swear, Naruto! You were the only-erk!"
Konohamaru didn't have many things he wanted. A nice home. A nice wife. The title of Hokage.
Right now, all he wanted was for his feet to be back on the ground.
Simple pleasures….Until something's gone missing, you always take it for granted. Internally, Konohamaru swore he would never take the absence of Naruto's hands around his neck for granted ever again.
Promise.
"Please let go of me now?" Konohamaru pleaded. Naruto growled into his face. "I'll take that as a 'no', then", Konohamaru muttered.
"You assigned me as a teacher. A Jounin teacher. For a team of /genin/." Naruto just couldn't get over that fact. "How could you do that to me? That'll take up /years/ of my time." Seeing the terror on Konohamaru's face, Naruto relented a bit. "Well, not really. I get to test them one last time before they become Genins. I'll just fail them, and you can put them together with a /different/ teacher next year. How's that?" Naruto smiled at Konohamaru, letting him know this wasn't a big issue.
"Naruto…" Konohamaru looked at the ground, unsure of how to phrase this. "I want you to give them a chance. Seriously. They're all good ninjas, in their own right. I mean, it's the son of Shikamaru. The guy's a freaking genius, his son has to be at least passable." Naruto nodded, he had made the same observation. "And Kimiko is pretty quiet, but if you push her enough, she's incredible. She's got some amazing talent, she just doesn't want to use it. And Kutsu…He reminds me of you, in a way. Not always the best, right now. But he tried the hardest. To be honest…"
Konohamaru leaned close, getting ready to whisper something in Naruto's ear.
"I'm a little worried about the kid. He's either the clumsiest ninja I've ever seen, or there's something funny going on at his house. He comes in every couple of days with a new bruise. I asked him about it once, and he made it pretty clear that it was none of my business. I mean, I'm only his academy teacher. He's got parents, so there's not much I can do. I'd rather respect his wishes. But if you could just keep an eye on him? For me"
Konohamaru looked Naruto squarely now. "If you do…I'll buy you a bowl of Ramen. Anything. Just give them a chance, okay?"
Naruto shook his head and sighed.
"Okay, fine. Only for you. And only a chance."
The teacher smiled, knowing the fish had eaten the bait. "That's all I'm asking."
***
"This sucks. Where is he? He said meet at twelve sharp, right?"
"May…maybe he's just running a little late?"
"A little? It's been two hours. That's two hours I could have spent in bed. I skipped my breakfast to get here on time, and now he's late."
Kutsu glared at the lazy boy. "Then get up a little earlier, bum. And stop complaining."
Shikashi swiveled his head to look at Kutsu. "Stop complaining?", he muttered. "Why? I've been waiting here for two hours. I think that gives me the right to bellyache a bit."
Kutsu shook his head. "No. This might be the test. To see how long we can wait without complaining. If it is, I don't want to fail because you got up too late to eat your breakfast."
"…it's been two hours, man. The test would have been over by now." Shikashi's voice contained obvious disbelief that somebody could be so…weird. A test? Waiting? What sort of lousy test was that?
Just as Kimiko was about to
interject with her comments, a loud voice interrupted the exchange.
"Sorry I'm late, guys. I was walking down the road, and I saw a little old lady
trying to cross the street. How could I, a Konoha Jounin, let her go unaided? It's my civic duty to~" Naruto paused, surprised at the lack of response.
"First of all, there are no little old ladies like that in Konoha. Second of all, the streets aren't that dangerous. And third, it doesn't take two hours to help somebody across a road. If nothing else, you could just pick her up and carry her." Shikashi ticked off points on his fingers, a bored and irritated look on his face.
"Yeah, sure. So maybe I exaggerated a little bit. My only justification is that /somebody/ has to do the navel contemplation around here." Naruto sniffed, obviously put out. Not even Sakura had bothered refuting Kakashi's excuses as solidly as that. She normally just shouted "Liar" at him, and left it at them.
Kutsu shot a glare at both Shikashi and Naruto. "Can we just get on with the test? I've got things I need to do today, so let's hurry up and finally become real ninjas."
Naruto looked at him curiously. "Confident, aren't we? How about I explain the test before you assume that you've passed." He jumped onto a tall pole. "Follow me to the testing grounds, and I'll tell you what's up."
He disappeared.
Kutsu looked around for a moment, then kicked the post in anger. "Great," he shouted. "How are we supposed to follow him if we can't see him when he moves?"
"Um…he went that way." Kimiko pointed. Both Skikashi and Kutsu looked at her.
"How can you tell?", asked Shikashi.
Kimiko gave a small grin, the first either of the boys had ever seen. "Midomaru can smell him." She said, indicating the dog perched on her shoulder.
Kutsu gaped. "You talk to that dog?" he questioned. Kimiko tilted her head at him.
"Doesn't everybody?"
***
"Took you guys long enough to get here." Muttered Naruto. Kutsu ignored the dig at their speed. He had more important things to worry about.
"Well, we're here now. So what's the test?" he panted. Going that fast was exhausting, even if only for a little bit.
Naruto indicated around the area. "You three will go inside that fort over there. Maps are inside. In the middle room, there's a scroll. Your goal is to protect the scroll at all costs. You'll have a half hour to plan and set traps, then I'm coming in after you. Keep the scroll out of my hands for one hour after I come in, and you pass. If I get the scroll, then you fail. Simple, no?"
Kimiko tentatively raised her hand. "Um, Naruto-sensei? Are there any rules on what jutsus we can or can't use?"
Naruto laughed. "Nah.." he said. "Use whatever you want to. I will."
Kimiko shivered, aware of how many jutsus a Jounin knew. She may never have seen Naruto fight, but she'd heard stories from her dad. She knew that Naruto-sensei had some sort of special Bunshin jutsu, but her father had mentioned that his biggest strength was his complete determination.
***
"Naruto's got plenty of strong jutsus, there's no doubt about that. His chakra level is sky high, as far as I can tell. And he's pretty smart, for all that he failed the academy three times."
Kiba bonked his daughter on the forehead, calling her attention to his words, not brushing her puppy.
"But remember this, Kimiko. The thing which makes Naruto so completely strong is the fact that he never gives up. He could have any sort of handicap or injury you could possibly imagine, and he'd still get up and fight any opponent. Not a moment's hesitation. If you could ever have even half of that determination, then you'd be unstoppable.
That's the key to strength, Kimiko. Never give up your goal."
***
Wordlessly, the three almost-Genin turned and entered the fort.
With deliberate intensity, they collected their maps and began discussing strategy, Shikashi pointing key areas to defend, Kimiko elaborating on what little she knew about Naruto-sensei, and Kutsu giving suggestions on whatever he could.
The clock kept on ticking.
***
Naruto had his eyes closed. Listening, listening…now.
Turning, he pulled a kunai out of its holster and hurled it at a tree. He smiled at the result.
Pinned perfectly through the veins were six leaves. Evidence of his previous attempts littered the other trees, kunai with five, four, three, and so on leaves underneath them.
Naruto closed his eyes again, ready to try for seven.
Listening, listening….now.
Again, he turned and pulled the kunai from its holster. Just as he began to hurl it, a shrill electronic beeping distracted him.
::BEEPBEEPBEEPBEEP::
Cursing, Naruto fumbled at the watch. He finally threw the kunai into a tree after he almost cut off his hand. Only then did he finally find the elusive "stop" button.
He swore those things moved around.
Well, mostly he just swore. But he did think they moved.
Now that the watch was turned off, he remembered what the alarm was for in the first place.
Smiling viciously, he began walking towards the entrance.
***
Kutsu shivered with anticipation. Naruto was coming, he knew it. And when he got here, Kutsu would show him! There was no way he could fail this test. Not after leaving his house. Unless he was an official ninja, he'd be sent back into his father's custody for another year.
It wasn't a fate Kutsu wanted to think about. And nor did he need to. Because today, Kutsu would defeat anything this clown threw at him!
A tapping sound brought Kutsu out of his internal reverie. He glanced down from where he was supporting himself above the jamb for the door, and saw a pebble. He waited.
A head poked itself in. It was covered in a shaggy mess of blonde hair. Kutsu reached down and light as a feather, brushed the very tips of the hair.
Yep. It was a real body, not just a bunshin. Kutsu waited just a moment longer, then attacked. Like a hawk, he jumped on the back of the clown-ninja. Quickly, he wrapped his legs around the Jounin's torso, and grabbed at the sleeves, intending to tie them shut. As soon as he hit the clown-ninja, he remembered what Kimiko had told him. 'Oh yeah. Can't he make solid clones or something?'
The elder ninja disappeared with a /pop/, and Kutsu fell to the ground.
"Obviously you've never seen my Kage Bunshin no Jutsu. It's useful in situations like this. Wheras the Bunshin no Jutsu simply creates a chakra illusion of a body, the Kage Bunshin actually creates a real, living body. Since it actually exists, it can make blows- and take them. So it helped me out, here."
God, Kutsu hated that irritating drawl. He sprang up from the floor into a ready position, cursing himself for falling for such an obvious trap.
Rather, he flopped a bit on the ground, and Naruto chuckled. "You didn't notice me tying you up, either. Don't worry, though. That's not a special jutsu; that's just you being inattentive."
Naruto crouched, looking Kutsu straight in the eye, still with a stupid clown-smile on his face. "Now…I hope you don't mind if I borrow your face for a bit?"
Kutsu would have replied but for the gag which had somehow gotten in his mouth. 'Jeez. This guy is fast', came a strangely detached thought. Of course, there wasn't much else to do. None of the basic escapes he had been taught at the academy had prepared him for a knot like this. He couldn't even see it. All he could do was watch Naruto perform Henge no Jutsu, turning into a stunning likeliness of himself.
Naruto stood up, checking himself over to make sure the Henge no Jutsu had worked correctly. Satisfied, he trotted off down the hall.
***
Shikashi looked around the room, making sure everything was in place. No matter how often Kutsu insisted that Naruto wouldn't get past him, Shikashi knew better. It didn't matter how good of a Genin Kutsu was. Naruto was a Jounin. No Genin could possibly have a hope of beating a Jounin, the difference in skill level was simply too great.
Shikashi didn't think that the team could keep Naruto away from the scroll for even half an hour. But it was important to Kutsu that the team pass this test, for whatever reason. Shikashi intended to help him get there.
His eyes shifted to the right, meeting those of Kimiko. Despite her quiet attitude, he noticed that she knew quite a bit about general ninjutsu, and had the ability to pull off more jutsu that many of the other Genin in her class. She knew, in fact, more jutsu than Shikashi did. 'If she could figure out how to apply them, she'd be a shoo-in for Chuunin, even though she's a rookie', mused Shikashi.
Again, his eyes roamed over the array of traps set up around the pedestal with the scroll on it. He knew he was being paranoid, but he was going up against a Jounin. The only one of his abilities they knew about was his Kage Bunshin no Jutsu. Naruto would probably send one of those solid 'shadow' clones into the room ahead of him, as he had most likely done when he entered the building. Shikashi hoped that Kutsu had remembered that.
***
Kutsu was dining on fruits and meats with beautiful ladies serving him.
Well, okay. There weren't any meats. And to be honest, the fruit hadn't ripened in time.
Okay, fine. The serving ladies weren't all that beautiful. In fact, they were rather homely.
If you wanted to get technical, they weren't actually anything at all.
Kutsu lay on the ground, fiercely imagining fruits, meats, and beautiful ladies.
"C'mon" he muttered, having spit out the gag. "All I want is a single slice of pork. Okay, how about an apple? An apple slice? A grape? A grape /slice/?"
Kutsu's imagination was entirely too miserly, he decided.
God, he wished he had remembered that technique.
***
Kutsu-Naruto stuck his head in the door. "Hey, guys!" he called. "I thought of a great idea!" Shikashi approached him cautiously. It could be just Kutsu being stupid, he thought. Then again, it's more likely that it's Naruto using Henge. Shikashi thought hard. Could the Kage Bunshin use Chakra coils? He didn't know, but he thought it would be safer to assume so.
"Why aren't you at the door?" he asked guardedly. Kutsu shrugged in apology.
"He got past me. You were right, I wasn't strong enough. But anyway, I thought of a great idea to keep the scroll away from him." Shikashi raised a brow in a questioning look.
"Care to explain?" he asked. Out of the corner of his eye, he noticed the stone pattern on the wall shifting and rippling. 'Odd' he noted. Still keeping his eyes on the Bunshin, a part of his mind detached itself to think about the wall.
'It's rippling. That would indicate somebody's there. It's not Kimiko, she's waiting outside the eastern door for my signal. So what…' the part of his mind struck on the solution.
"-I'll take the scroll, and replace it with something else. Do you have a blank one?"
With half a brain, Shikashi listened to the proposed plan. At the same time, he was forming one of his own. The Bunshin frowned. "Hey. Are you listening?"
Shikashi didn't even bother to respond. As quick as he could, he whipped a throwing kunai into the Bunshin's head. It disappeared, much like he suspected. As he franticly made the hand seals for Kagemane no Jutsu, he noted with detachment that the Kage Bunshin could indeed use chakra, for at least a simple Jutsu like Henge.
As he stretched his shadow out to the rippling section of the wall, he shouted for Kimiko, "NOW!
The two shadows connected, and the real Naruto blurred into vision. Shikashi relaxed slightly. His chakra would hold out for around forty seconds, more than enough time for Kimiko to finish tying the Jounin up. Despite the fact that he was in a bad position, Naruto smiled.
"So you saw through my Kagehensou no Jutsu [1]? Better than I expected." Shikashi moved his hands to make them easier to tie, and a small orb fell to the ground. Naruto's smile grew shark-like. "However, your Kagemane no Jutsu depends on shadows."
Shikamaru put two and two together, and screwed his eyes shut while calling for Kimiko to do the same. Before he could complete the thought, the flashbang went off, and the shadows went away.
Kimiko didn't react fast enough, so she would be light-blind for at least a minute or two. Shikashi franticly backpedaled, grabbing the scroll. Intellectually, he knew it was hopeless. The instant the flashbang lit, the Genin had lost. In his mind, he knew that.
But he'd be damned if he was going to give up just like that. Quickly, he dropped a smoke bomb to cover his escape.
***
Naruto streaked down the halls, looking for Shikashi. "The kid couldn't have gotten that far away yet. I should be seeing him in just a moment…" Naruto wheeled around a corner and ran straight into his target. A small part of his brain saw that Kutsu was lying on the floor, still tied up. The rest of his mind was occupied with pilfering the scroll out of Shikashi's pocket.
The Nara stuck a quick blow at Naruto's face, but it never connected. Naruto shifted his weight to one leg, stuck the other in between Shikashi's, and gave a quick twist. The Genin fell to the floor in a heap, and Naruto wasted no time in tying him up. The kid had proven himself to be smart, the Jounin didn't want any more last minute surprises. Now that the threat had been neutralized, Naruto looked triumphantly at the scroll in his hand.
"Well", he said, "I guess that wraps it up. I win, you lo-" A look of suspicion flitted across Naruto's face.
Slowly, he unwrapped the scroll, inspecting the inside. It wasn't the technique scroll he had put there that morning.
"I guess you already thought of the plan I suggested", Naruto mentioned idly. "Care to tell me where you hid it?" Shikashi looked at Naruto with defiance in his eyes. Kutsu did the same thing, except with bewilderment.
Naruto closed his eyes and ran his hands along Shikashi's body. The gesture was deliberate, and everybody understood the significance. Naruto was frisking the genin for any more scrolls. Satisfied that Shikashi didn't have it, Naruto moved to the next closest ninja. Kutsu began thrashing, attempting to keep Naruto away. That smile, that damn smile, came back.
A hand darted into Kutsu's pocket, and came out not nearly as empty as it had come in. Naruto unrolled this scroll as well, and his face glowed. There was the technique, just like he wrote it. The scroll closed with a snap, and Naruto surveyed the two genin in front of him.
"I'm happy to say", he announced, "That all three of you fail."
***
Coming up: "You will not lay a hand on this boy". His voice was cold and unemotional. "Oh yeah? Who the hell are you?" The response was filled with acid. "His teacher."
***
[1]: Kagehensou no Jutsu: Shadow Disguise Technique. The user channels their chakra to blend in with their surroundings. While using this technique, it's impossible to be seen straight on; only out of the corners of their eye will skilled Ninja notice a rippling effect. Variation on the Henge no Jutsu.
The facepaint-tattoo thing that Kutsu keeps on mentioning isn't something I made up. In one of the books about Naruto, there's a foldout picture of Naruto, Sakura, and Sasuke as adults. Naruto has red lines outlining his lips, and three lines connect in an arrow pattern at the inside corner of his eyes, then the lines arch up his forehead. Looks kinda weird, but there you go. I don't know what the point of the tattoo is, but it doesn't appear to be all that uncommon for ninja to have tattoos on their face. Kankuro, Gaara, the entire Akimichi clan, the entire Inuzuka clan, Jiraiya, and Orochimaru all have marks on their face of some sort. My guess is it's either a personal statement (in the case of Gaara) or perhaps it helps them channel their chakra, or perform some special technique. I honestly don't know. For now, I'll say that the tattoo helps Naruto do something cool, although I haven't quite decided what, though. I do have some ideas, so maybe I'll use it in a future chapter.
Okay. Now, I want to thank everybody for the incredible response I got to the first chapter. I think it's somewhere around 27 or 28 reviews?
Wow. Seriously, guys. That really does mean a lot to me. Even if you just said something simple like "Great story, keep it up", it really made my day. That's part of why I worked hard to get this chapter out quickly. There were a couple questions people asked in their reviews, all of which I'll get to later.
So how do you like this chapter? One person mentioned that I used one or two sentence paragraphs pretty often in the first one, so I tried to work on that a bit during this chapter. Does it flow well? Overall, I'd say that I liked the first chapter a bit better, but that might just be me. Did you guys notice a difference? Was it better or worse? I'm honestly looking for input, here. This will affect how I write the rest of the story.
Okay. I know I didn't make it quite clear in the last chapter, so here's a list of who's with who and so on. Naruto, Shino, Hinata, Konohamaru, and Lee are all single. Sakura and Sasuke are married, with one boy, Uchiwa Hana, 16. Blame his mother for the name. Shikamaru and Ino are married, with one girl, Inoka, 16, and one boy, Shikashi, 12. Kiba and Tenten are married with one girl, Kimiko, 12, and one boy, Shogo, 8. Nobody else has really made huge appearances yet. If they do, I'll update you as to their marital status.
Okay. Yes, Kiba and Tenten are together. Yes, I know it's weird. I don't know if I'll write a fic about it. A couple people have mentioned it, so there's obviously interest. I'll keep the idea bouncing around in my brain. If anything comes up, I'll write it down and post it for you guys.
And for the stuff about the ages: Rather than make a long explanation here, I just went and edited the first chapter a bit to explain it. In a nutshell: Naruto is mid-thirties, Tsunade is pushing 70. It's all explained in the chapter. If it really bugs you, you can go back and read it. Anybody know how long the fourth was in office?
Okay, I guess that wraps it up. I'll see you guys again when I finish the next chapter, I guess.