Chapter Six: Anguished Cries

"What are you doing here?" Kyousuke Jin asked in annoyance, his eyes narrowing drastically that his visitors noticed the change despite the pair of eyeglasses he was wearing. He rose from his seat, putting away a large piece of paper that contained a sketch of the new Gear he was designing, and faced the newcomers with a scowl. "If you've come to ask if the rumors are true, I tell you that they are. The whole story at the GFA's website is true as well. Satisfied? Now go, get out and leave me alone; I'm busy here." He then added under his breath, "I swear I'm going to seal that door with a password… I can't work with people just barging in without permission whenever they please!"

"But they can't be true! Kuroudo can't be deaf! You're lying, Kyousuke! You're lying, just like everyone else! Just like the author of that stupid story!" Kazuya Shichigawa, the Gear Master's former teammate, insisted, his hands clamped into fists on his sides. He couldn't and didn't want to believe that their friend, who risked so much for them and their team, Team Griffon, was suffering from a cruel disease that cost him practically his life --- his life in the Gear Fighting world. "And how could he have resigned from the Tobita Club? That's impossible! You wouldn't let him! You wouldn't let him…" His voice quivered, making his next question sound like a desperate plea. "You wouldn't let him, would you, Kyousuke?"

Mitsuke Ohmori only looked on in silence.

The other's initial reply was a faint whisper, tears brimming at the corners of his eyes. "I couldn't stop him," he told them sadly, before he whirled around to expose his anguish-filled face. "I couldn't stop him, do you hear me?! I tried, I tried very hard, but all I could say was for them to give him time! Yes, time --- time to sulk in his depression and mourn over his loss! I wasn't able to do anything, not a thing to make a difference, and I didn't even notice that something was wrong in the first place! And I'm supposed to be his best friend! His best friend!"

And he began to cry, losing control of his emotions as he fell on his knees, weakened not only in body but also in spirit. Kazuya wasn't able to take it anymore either, and without a word he turned around and sprinted off, leaving his companion in the dark working area of the Tobita Club's Gear Master. At that, Mitsuke took a step forward, taking a deep breath to stabilize himself. He was just as devastated as his two friends, yes, but he couldn't let his sensitivity get the best of him. Not when he could do something better than cry for Kuroudo. "Don't be so hard on yourself, Kyousuke," he advised in a soft, barely audible voice. "It's not your fault that it happened. Best friend or not, it's not your fault. It's nobody's fault. It was meant to happen to Kuroudo, and as much as we dislike it---"

"We have to cope with it?" Kyousuke retorted in a bitter tone, his eyes still downcast. Then his head suddenly snapped up, his gaze landing on the Gear Fighter's figure that was a silhouette against the light that shone through the half-open door. "You don't understand, Mitsuke! You don't, you can't, and you'll never understand! Nobody understands me, nobody does! Why, did you understand my purpose of putting that microchip inside the Shooting Mirage? Did you? You didn't! Even Kuroudo, my best friend, didn't! You, all of you, thought of me as a scheming cheat who wanted nothing but victory, who hungered nothing but success! You didn't understand me then; how could I expect you to understand me now?!"

The Gear Fighter couldn't say anything --- because the Gear Master was right.

The dagger of pain drove itself deeper into Armelle's heart as she watched her son go through another cycle of heart-wrenching tears and anguished cries from the slightly open door of his bedroom. Kuroudo was resting his head against the arm he had fixed on his study table --- muttering something to himself that he couldn't even hear --- his other hand clamped over one of picture frames that lost its ground, only its black backside visible. It was, the older Marume soon realized, the ornament that contained the photograph of him and his friends during the Asian Cup, and in it, all of them were grinning widely as if they had won the tournament themselves.

And Kuroudo didn't want to look at it anymore.

"Why?! Why me?! What have done deserve this?! What I do?!" the flaxen-haired young man asked in a loud yet muffled voice, and it pained Armelle even more. Hearing-impaired individuals, she was told, knew nothing of volume --- and the fact that her son was straining his voice that much and was speaking in incomplete sentences served as a reminder of his unfortunate condition. And it was something she hated to be reminded about. "Kouya… Jirou… Kaoru… Lilika… Kyousuke…" A longer pause. "You most especially, Kyousuke. I'm sorry. I only bring defeat. How can I win a battle without hearing? Sorry. I can't go back… can't go on."

Armelle had seen enough, had heard enough. Tears springing from her eyes abundantly like a fountain, she turned and walked away with a heavy heart, almost unable to contain the pain she was feeling inside. There was nothing she could do about the situation, just as there was nothing she could do to change her son's fate. She didn't have the power to turn back time. She didn't have the power to change things by just snapping her fingers. She didn't have the power to make him well again by just waving her hand.

Is this it? The price for the mistake I committed in the past? The price my son has to pay? But why him? Why not I? It was my mistake, not his! she thought angrily, stopping in her tracks and leaning against the cold concrete wall to support herself. She squeezed her eyes shut, hoping that somehow, the pain would go away, even if she knew that she was asking for the impossible. However, she found herself saying instead, "This is all your fault, Mamoru. This is entirely your fault."

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Author's Notes: I apologize for the delay, everyone; I've had so much homework to do and exams to study for. To make matters worse, we have pre-midterm exams next week. Anyway, I'd like to thank everyone who reviewed! You're really inspiring! I'd also like to take this opportunity to thank my friend Hareta for letting me know the names of the two other Griffon members, my sister Raine aka Fire Princess for her suggestions with regards to the Takeshi/Lilika situation (even if there was none in this chapter), and my best friend Lous for the French translations I will be using in the later chapters.

I would like to apologize, however, for any OOC-ness that you might have spotted --- as I mentioned before, I'm a newbie at writing Crush Gear Turbo fanfiction, so I might have a lot of mistakes. Please understand my situation. As for deaf people not being able to say sentences correctly (missing out words here and there), I got that through experience, as I have a former schoolmate who's deaf. She doesn't talk much, but she screams really loud. After all, she doesn't have to worry about hurting her ears. *grins* Anyway, please review and keep the suggestions coming!