Chapter 4
Ok.. Monday meant school again. The day was almost over and Kyo couldn't wait. Kyo walked as one condemned. As though the world of bright colors had suddenly fallen gray. It was. So many tears had passed before his eyes that they had washed the color out of his sight. He knew if something was blue, yes, but why would he care? It didn't matter what color things were. If it's a blue pencil or a black one. They'll both write in gray. Gray...
His eyes hardly left the floor and it had been weeks since he'd tried to hit Yuki. He passed Arisa, Hana, and Tohru in the hall, with his bag over his shoulder and his other hand in his pocket, looking at the floor. Arisa (Uo) had a hand on Tohru's back, trying to make her brighten up. As Kyo passed, she noticed how his mood had been down for a while.
"Carrot Top seems down too. I wonder what bugging him. Have you two caught a cold?" Tohru shook her head slightly. "Come on Tohru. What's wrong? We don't wanna be left out like before." Uo begged. "True." Hana added. Tohru looked up, as though she just caught what her friend had said and she walked faster than she had in a while, to catch up with Kyo.
"Kyo..." she asked shyly as she came up to him. "Hmm..." Kyo avoided her eyes and she tried to make contact. "Kyo... I'm sorry." He stopped walking and for the first time in a month, made eye contact with Tohru Honda. "I've been crying a lot. And thinking a lot." She said, now she was the one avoiding his gaze. "If you think it's your fault, it's not." Kyo said, returning his gaze to the floor.
"But it is.. isn't it.." Tohru continued. "It's because of me that you were crying. Because of me that your in pain." She said as the final bell rang and students left. "And my fault for yours." Kyo reminded her. "Kyo.. I..." Kyo cut her off. Other students were in such a hurry to leave that the halls were already starting to empty. "It's old news. Don't bring it up. Any of it." Kyo's voice had been full of anger.
Tohru flinched. "Why?" She asked. Again making eye contact. "Why Kyo? Why have you been avoiding me and never looking me straight in the eyes, and never being around?" She asked a little more sternly than she probably intended. Kyo was take aback by her sudden outburst.
'Because I love you.' He wanted to say. But he remained quiet. He could see the hurt building in her eyes. 'She wants to say it. Not here. Even if I got over it... This is.. school. It isn't right.' He looked around. 'But.. I don't know if I'm ready to hear those words... I don't...' He closed his eyes. "I don't... Know.." Kyo finally said. And with that he ran off. This time he went to the roof of Shigure's house. She could find him there. He just hoped she wasn't too broken to try. He could tell her here. He could... He was ready... He hoped so anyway.