[b]Chapter 23[/b]
"Wake up, Hannah." Liz stood over Hannah.
"No." She pulled the pillow over her head.
"It's time for kindergarten." Liz tried.
"No!" Hannah rolled over. Of all times to be a lazy riser, Liz rolled her eyes.
"Come on, Hannah bean."
"Fine." She threw off the covers with exaggerated movements.
"You know you're excited." Liz tickled her cheek.
"Yes." She nodded her head. "You take me?"
"Of course, my love." Liz hugged her daughter. "Now get up so that we can get ready."
"Ok." She smiled. "You're going to pick me up?"
"Yes." She wanted to tell her that Max was going to pick her up as well but she wanted it to be a surprise.
"How do you want your hair?" Liz asked when Hannah settled down enough in front of her so she could actually comb it.
"Princess style." She said automatically.
"Alright.
"Can we go see Kailyn today?"
"Maybe." Liz smiled when she thought of the baby.
"Grandma Amy says she'll be there for a few months."
"She probably will, so you'll get to know her well enough." Liz felt the baby soft hair on Hannah's head.
Her baby was going to kindergarten.
And her baby's father knew nothing about her.
"Hi, Serena!" Hannah smiled at her.
"Morning, Cutie Pie." She smiled at her. "Ready for your first day of kindergarten?"
"Yes." She was becoming more excited by the moment. "Is it time?"
"Not yet, Hannah."
"Oh, hurry, Mommy." She stomped her foot.
"If we leave now you'll be too early."
"Please." Hannah drawled and put on a pout.
"Aww, Liz, how can you resist that? Just take the girl to school." Serena sided.
"Fine, fine, two against one, you win Hannah."
"Yes!" She grabbed her purple lunch pale and went for the door.
"Slow down, Hannah." Liz picked up her keys and purse.
"I'll see you later, Serena." Liz met her eyes. "If he calls." She emphasized he. "Tell him I'll be back in a half hour."
"Which he?" Serena asked, she stared at the floor, it was easy talking with Hannah there as an unknowing mediator.
Liz's gaze slid toward Hannah and Serena got the meaning. "Will do."
****
Liz surveyed the teacher as they neared the classroom. This is woman she would trust her daughter to for four hours a day.
She was older, maybe early fifties, which pleased Liz because she had experience. She had already met her once before at "kindergarten round- up". Mrs. Howell.
Hannah's grip tightened, "It's alright, Hannah bean, you met Mrs. Howell."
"Good morning, Hannah." The old woman's eyes sparkled. "Are you ready for kindergarten?"
Hannah shook her head and turned into Liz leg. "Mommy."
"Now, Hannah, we'll have a fun time, here, and in just a few hours Mommy's going to come pick you up."
"No." Liz hadn't been expecting a refusal.
"Hannah bean." Liz bent down to hold her child in her arms. "It's just like day care."
"No." The thought of her mother leaving her here, where she didn't know anybody was terrifying. "Don't go." She whispered as she tightened her grip around her neck.
"It's alright." Liz pulled her aside to so the other terrified four and five year olds could enter. "Hannah, it'll be fine, and imagine what you could tell Kyle, and...and...Max." She whispered in French. "You'd want to tell them what a brave little girl you'd been right?"
She nodded comforted. "I'll be good."
"Alright, are you going to go in there like the big girl I know you are?"
"Yes, Mommy." She hugged Liz one more time before she straightened and wiped her eyes.
"Come on." Liz stood once more as well, her heart breaking as she watched her little girl enter and sit where the teacher had marked at the small tables.
"Was french her first or second language, Ms. Parker?"
"Her first word was Mama so I don't exactly know. She speaks both equally." Liz shrugged. It wasn't abnormal for a child in Southern California to know Spanish, but French was a little different.
"Where did she learn it?" She asked curious.
"Her grandparents." She said automatically. Amy and Jim were her grandparents, much more so than her own parent could ever be.
"Interesting." Mrs. Howell explained. "Now, about Hannah's heart."
"She usually knows her limits and she knows to tell you if she doesn't feel well." Liz said quickly.
"I know, I'm sure she does." She reassured the young mother. "But there's nothing special you want me to look out for?"
"Not in particular." Liz racked her brain for anything. "And she'll be home for her afternoon meds so you don't have to worry about that."
"Yes." She smiled. "Now, if you don't mind I have a class of nervous kindergartners, I have to get to it, Hannah will be fine."
"Thank you." Liz took one more look in the classroom and found Hannah. Hannah gave her a little wave letting her know she was ok. Her throat clogged up as she turned. There were a dozen other mothers standing there as well, a few fathers interspersed.
"Don't worry, I can tell she's your first?" A woman with a two-year-old in her arms, and another clearly on the way, asked her as they walked to the parking lot.
"Yes." Liz said embarrassed, she didn't want to be labeled the overprotective mother.
"I've done this four times before, and it never gets any easier." Liz's mind was boggled at the thought of so many children. But the thought was comforting; here was a seasoned mother she could talk to.
"My little girl, Natalie, was the one your daughter was with, Hannah, wasn't it?"
"Yes." Her Hannah.
"Well, how would you like to follow me over to my place for a while and we can wallow over our lost babies together?" Liz looked down at her watch, she could afford it, she had time to kill and the less she thought about Max the faster the day would go.
"Why not?" Liz shrugged.
****
"I have four other children beside Natalie and Conner." Melissa, as she had learned her name was, pointed to the two-year-old.
"So many." Liz whispered before she could stop herself.
"Yeah, that's a common reaction." She smiled and patted her belly. "I swore this one would be the last. My husband and I enjoy having young ones around."
"I can understand that." She missed Hannah's constantly sticky hands and her childish laughter. Dear God, she was making it sound like she was going off to college, it was only kindergarten! She tried to tell herself.
"Hannah's your only?"
"Yeah, for now." Liz smiled wondering if Max was going to want more children.
The thought brought a frown to her face. She couldn't think like that. She could not think in terms of when, she had to keep out and think if, only if.
"Something wrong, dear?"
"No." Liz shook her head. "Tell me about your children."
"Well, my oldest is in eighth, Ethan, then Jennifer, sixth, Autumn, fourth, Ben, second, Natalie, Conner and the new baby."
"Wow." Liz still could quite imagine a houseful of so many children. It would be wonderful.
"You're planning to have more, you said?"
"Yeah, I would like to."
"What does Hannah's father think?"
"He doesn't."
"Oh, I'm sorry, Liz." She realized her fault, not everyone had a happy marriage these days. Or were married at all.
"It isn't really something we've discussed. I was so young when I had Hannah."
Melissa realized the use of I. "It's alright, you don't have to talk about it, I always have a tendency to stick my nose where it doesn't belong."
"It's alright." Liz looked down at her watch. It was ten thirty. "I really have to be going."
"Oh, all right." She said flustered. "You will call though?"
"Yes, yes." Liz nodded.
"We'll probably be getting to know each other very well over the coming years. Ethan met his current best friend in kindergarten, on the first day. So did all my other children." She smiled.
Liz laughed, that's when her and Isabel had become best friends. "Yeah, I met my best friend in kindergarten too."
"Alright then, I'll see you at noon."
"Yes, you will." Liz left the house feeling happier that Hannah seemed to already found a friend and she had gotten to spend the morning talking about her daughter's first day of school with someone who understood.
****
"Mr. Evans your mother called and wanted to speak with you." The young secretary was flustered. God he was gorgeous, and he was only a few years older than she was.
"Was it urgent?" He paused in the doorway, he'd be late if he had to call her back right now.
"With your mother it's always urgent but no, it wasn't work related."
"Alright, I'll be back in two hours."
"Where shall I say you will be?" She asked.
"Lunch meeting, with..." my daughter, he had been about to say. It was about to just flow right off his tongue. "some very important clients." He amended.
"Alright." She watched him leave. Yeah, he was gorgeous.
****
Liz ran the brush through her hair one last time.
The doorbell rang. This would be it.
"Hello, Max." She opened the door without looking. "Kyle."
"Good morning to you too, Liz, expecting someone?" He leaned against the doorpost.
"Yes, I do believe she was." Max stepped behind him. His gaze scanning the man in the doorway.
They eyed each other, each fighting for control. Neither was willing to back down.
"Alright you two, stop it." Liz stepped between them. "Kyle I really wished you had called, I had planned to go out with Max, before picking up Hannah."
"I've never had to call before, sweetheart." Liz winced at the pet name.
"I know, but I'd appreciate it if you did."
"Fine." He looked between them, if he wasn't careful Max was going to spring.
Kyle slid a protective hand around her waist and propelled her into the apartment, "Excuse us a moment, would you?" He shut the door.
Max glared, he knew Liz hated when she was directed somewhere especially in that way, if you wanted her to go somewhere, you asked her.
"Kyle what are you doing?" Liz exploded into rapid French.
"Trying to talk some sense into you." He said right back, just as angrily.
"He's going to hear you!"
"He can't understand anyway, what in the hell are you doing Liz? You hadn't told me you were planning on seeing him today."
"Kyle you've got skeletons in your closet, I've got mine." She stated in a calm voice, controlling herself.
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"Just guess Kyle, just guess." She didn't realize how angry she was at him for not telling her about Serena. "Now, before you get mad at me for not telling you something after two days, think about the plank in your eye before you take the splinter out of mine." She walked to the door and closed it softly behind her.
"We haven't gotten over each other Kyle, what makes you think she'll get over her daughter's father?" Serena stood in the doorway from her room, though she hadn't understood a word that had been said.
He glared at her before turning to walk back out the door.
"Sit, Kyle, we really need to talk." Serena pointed towards the couch.
"Alright." He knew it had been coming, he had asked her himself, hadn't he?
****
Max's eyes were still flaming when Liz walked out.
Alright, she knew how to deal with him once, how much could have changed?
She walked past him without saying anything knowing he would follow. She could feel his temper seething and his eyes burning into the back of her neck.
"I wasn't expecting him."
"Obviously." He tried to get a hold on his temper. He didn't need to be mad. He needed to think straight so he could talk rationally with Liz. "I'm sorry, Liz, I have no right to be angry with you."
That threw her off for a moment. She hadn't been expecting such an easy agreement. "Oh, well..." She didn't know what to say.
"Where'd you learn to speak French?"
"Kyle." She said smoothing down her pant leg. "I was thinking we could walk to pick her up, it's only down the street a little ways. Unless you had something else planned."
"No, I was just wanting to talk with you." He told her.
"Oh, well then." She didn't want to just start in on Hannah, but it looked like there really was no choice. "Well, nothing in particular?"
"No...well...us?"
"What about us?" She asked stunned.
"My relationship with Hannah." With you, he wanted to say.
"What about it?" Liz wondered. She knew he would never try to take Hannah away from her.
"Will you let one grow between us?" Would she allow it, even if his relationship with Liz was unable to be maintained.
"Of course." Hannah deserved to know her father. "If you promise not to hurt her." He knew he wouldn't not intentionally.
"I was thinking, that maybe one weekend, maybe, she could spend a weekend with me. Not anytime soon yet. She still doesn't know me well, but just once, if she didn't like it then never again."
Liz was stunned. No, not too fast. "We'll see." Same answer she gave to Hannah when the answer was no.
"Liz, don't do the 'we'll see' routine." He shook his head wondering if all mothers did that. "I hated when my mom gave me that answer."
"Sorry." She really wasn't. What better way to give herself longer to come up with an excuse? "Well, Hannah." Hannah has a heart condition that's going to be operated on in three weeks and then we'll see if she makes it out of surgery and then we'll see if she can go to your house. That wasn't going to work.
"Hannah's a little skittish around people she doesn't know. And she still likes to sleep in my bed, and she's never been away from me for longer than one night. And when she was, she was with Grandma Amy and Grandpa Jim." She rushed.
They walked into the schoolyard, but hung back a bit from the other parents so they can talk without the other mommy's hearing. "Who's Grandma Amy and Grandpa Jim?" He asked.
"Kyle's parents." She realized how that sounded and regretted it the second she said it. "That didn't..."
"I understand he's been around, so have they."
"No, it's not like that, Max. They've been around since Hannah's birth." Liz tried to defend herself. "When TOP workers came, and I was scared." She stopped. Dear God, she had gone too far.
"The who and why?" He asked turning her towards him.
Liz stared into his eyes then down to where her hand was holding her facing him. His grip was firm but gentle. She couldn't have moved if her life depended on it, yet she felt nothing except fire spreading throughout her body.
She was saved when she heard a familiar voice. "Liz, hello!"
Max dropped his arm and wanted to glare at the other woman with the two- year-old on her hip.
"Hi, Melissa." Liz turned quickly to the woman. "Conner."
"Hi!" Conner waved.
"Max, this is Melissa, and her son Conner. Mel, this is Max."
"Hello." Melissa eyed him and spotted the similarities to Hannah and connected the dots. "You must be Hannah's father."
Max caught Liz's eye on what to do. She gave a shrug and looked at the ground.
"Technically, yes." He answered.
"Oh." Melissa cursed herself again and shifted Conner on her hip.
"Mommy!" They were all saved from the awkward situation. There were about twenty-five of the same shouts but Max watched in fascination as Liz quickly picked out the one belonging to Hannah and turned towards her.
"Hello, Hannah bean." Liz scooped her up and squeezed her to her.
"Hi." Hannah said shyly when she saw Max. Her eyes lit up. "What are you doing here?"
"Your mother thought it would be nice if I came along, if you don't mind."
"No!" Then she turned back to Liz. "Can Nat come over to the apartment?"
"Not today, we're going to stay with Max and then you have a doctor's appointment." Liz explained.
"Oh." She didn't like the thought of the doctor's office, and laid her head on her mother's shoulder, suddenly becoming sad.
"I'm sorry, maybe another day."
"Yeah, maybe another day. Come on, Natalie." Melissa turned away with Natalie in tow, as she waved bye to Hannah.
"See you tomorrow."
"Bye, Nat." Hannah called. Darn doctors. "No, doctor's, Mommy, I breathe fine." She took a deep breath to prove it.
She coughed after that and Liz frowned. So did Max.
Was Hannah sick? He wondered to himself. If she was, why hadn't Liz told him? But Hannah's knowing of the doctor, and easy acceptance made him doubtful that this was not a temporary thing.
"Someone going to fill me in?"
Liz knew she should have told him, before he found out. Now, he was going to be angry, which he had every right to be.
"My heart's sick." Hannah said helpfully.
Liz groaned inwardly.
Max raised an eyebrow and folded his arms over his chest much as Hannah did when she wanted to know something.
"Come back to the apartment, and I'll tell you." Liz said.
Max nodded and began walking back.
"Wake up, Hannah." Liz stood over Hannah.
"No." She pulled the pillow over her head.
"It's time for kindergarten." Liz tried.
"No!" Hannah rolled over. Of all times to be a lazy riser, Liz rolled her eyes.
"Come on, Hannah bean."
"Fine." She threw off the covers with exaggerated movements.
"You know you're excited." Liz tickled her cheek.
"Yes." She nodded her head. "You take me?"
"Of course, my love." Liz hugged her daughter. "Now get up so that we can get ready."
"Ok." She smiled. "You're going to pick me up?"
"Yes." She wanted to tell her that Max was going to pick her up as well but she wanted it to be a surprise.
"How do you want your hair?" Liz asked when Hannah settled down enough in front of her so she could actually comb it.
"Princess style." She said automatically.
"Alright.
"Can we go see Kailyn today?"
"Maybe." Liz smiled when she thought of the baby.
"Grandma Amy says she'll be there for a few months."
"She probably will, so you'll get to know her well enough." Liz felt the baby soft hair on Hannah's head.
Her baby was going to kindergarten.
And her baby's father knew nothing about her.
"Hi, Serena!" Hannah smiled at her.
"Morning, Cutie Pie." She smiled at her. "Ready for your first day of kindergarten?"
"Yes." She was becoming more excited by the moment. "Is it time?"
"Not yet, Hannah."
"Oh, hurry, Mommy." She stomped her foot.
"If we leave now you'll be too early."
"Please." Hannah drawled and put on a pout.
"Aww, Liz, how can you resist that? Just take the girl to school." Serena sided.
"Fine, fine, two against one, you win Hannah."
"Yes!" She grabbed her purple lunch pale and went for the door.
"Slow down, Hannah." Liz picked up her keys and purse.
"I'll see you later, Serena." Liz met her eyes. "If he calls." She emphasized he. "Tell him I'll be back in a half hour."
"Which he?" Serena asked, she stared at the floor, it was easy talking with Hannah there as an unknowing mediator.
Liz's gaze slid toward Hannah and Serena got the meaning. "Will do."
****
Liz surveyed the teacher as they neared the classroom. This is woman she would trust her daughter to for four hours a day.
She was older, maybe early fifties, which pleased Liz because she had experience. She had already met her once before at "kindergarten round- up". Mrs. Howell.
Hannah's grip tightened, "It's alright, Hannah bean, you met Mrs. Howell."
"Good morning, Hannah." The old woman's eyes sparkled. "Are you ready for kindergarten?"
Hannah shook her head and turned into Liz leg. "Mommy."
"Now, Hannah, we'll have a fun time, here, and in just a few hours Mommy's going to come pick you up."
"No." Liz hadn't been expecting a refusal.
"Hannah bean." Liz bent down to hold her child in her arms. "It's just like day care."
"No." The thought of her mother leaving her here, where she didn't know anybody was terrifying. "Don't go." She whispered as she tightened her grip around her neck.
"It's alright." Liz pulled her aside to so the other terrified four and five year olds could enter. "Hannah, it'll be fine, and imagine what you could tell Kyle, and...and...Max." She whispered in French. "You'd want to tell them what a brave little girl you'd been right?"
She nodded comforted. "I'll be good."
"Alright, are you going to go in there like the big girl I know you are?"
"Yes, Mommy." She hugged Liz one more time before she straightened and wiped her eyes.
"Come on." Liz stood once more as well, her heart breaking as she watched her little girl enter and sit where the teacher had marked at the small tables.
"Was french her first or second language, Ms. Parker?"
"Her first word was Mama so I don't exactly know. She speaks both equally." Liz shrugged. It wasn't abnormal for a child in Southern California to know Spanish, but French was a little different.
"Where did she learn it?" She asked curious.
"Her grandparents." She said automatically. Amy and Jim were her grandparents, much more so than her own parent could ever be.
"Interesting." Mrs. Howell explained. "Now, about Hannah's heart."
"She usually knows her limits and she knows to tell you if she doesn't feel well." Liz said quickly.
"I know, I'm sure she does." She reassured the young mother. "But there's nothing special you want me to look out for?"
"Not in particular." Liz racked her brain for anything. "And she'll be home for her afternoon meds so you don't have to worry about that."
"Yes." She smiled. "Now, if you don't mind I have a class of nervous kindergartners, I have to get to it, Hannah will be fine."
"Thank you." Liz took one more look in the classroom and found Hannah. Hannah gave her a little wave letting her know she was ok. Her throat clogged up as she turned. There were a dozen other mothers standing there as well, a few fathers interspersed.
"Don't worry, I can tell she's your first?" A woman with a two-year-old in her arms, and another clearly on the way, asked her as they walked to the parking lot.
"Yes." Liz said embarrassed, she didn't want to be labeled the overprotective mother.
"I've done this four times before, and it never gets any easier." Liz's mind was boggled at the thought of so many children. But the thought was comforting; here was a seasoned mother she could talk to.
"My little girl, Natalie, was the one your daughter was with, Hannah, wasn't it?"
"Yes." Her Hannah.
"Well, how would you like to follow me over to my place for a while and we can wallow over our lost babies together?" Liz looked down at her watch, she could afford it, she had time to kill and the less she thought about Max the faster the day would go.
"Why not?" Liz shrugged.
****
"I have four other children beside Natalie and Conner." Melissa, as she had learned her name was, pointed to the two-year-old.
"So many." Liz whispered before she could stop herself.
"Yeah, that's a common reaction." She smiled and patted her belly. "I swore this one would be the last. My husband and I enjoy having young ones around."
"I can understand that." She missed Hannah's constantly sticky hands and her childish laughter. Dear God, she was making it sound like she was going off to college, it was only kindergarten! She tried to tell herself.
"Hannah's your only?"
"Yeah, for now." Liz smiled wondering if Max was going to want more children.
The thought brought a frown to her face. She couldn't think like that. She could not think in terms of when, she had to keep out and think if, only if.
"Something wrong, dear?"
"No." Liz shook her head. "Tell me about your children."
"Well, my oldest is in eighth, Ethan, then Jennifer, sixth, Autumn, fourth, Ben, second, Natalie, Conner and the new baby."
"Wow." Liz still could quite imagine a houseful of so many children. It would be wonderful.
"You're planning to have more, you said?"
"Yeah, I would like to."
"What does Hannah's father think?"
"He doesn't."
"Oh, I'm sorry, Liz." She realized her fault, not everyone had a happy marriage these days. Or were married at all.
"It isn't really something we've discussed. I was so young when I had Hannah."
Melissa realized the use of I. "It's alright, you don't have to talk about it, I always have a tendency to stick my nose where it doesn't belong."
"It's alright." Liz looked down at her watch. It was ten thirty. "I really have to be going."
"Oh, all right." She said flustered. "You will call though?"
"Yes, yes." Liz nodded.
"We'll probably be getting to know each other very well over the coming years. Ethan met his current best friend in kindergarten, on the first day. So did all my other children." She smiled.
Liz laughed, that's when her and Isabel had become best friends. "Yeah, I met my best friend in kindergarten too."
"Alright then, I'll see you at noon."
"Yes, you will." Liz left the house feeling happier that Hannah seemed to already found a friend and she had gotten to spend the morning talking about her daughter's first day of school with someone who understood.
****
"Mr. Evans your mother called and wanted to speak with you." The young secretary was flustered. God he was gorgeous, and he was only a few years older than she was.
"Was it urgent?" He paused in the doorway, he'd be late if he had to call her back right now.
"With your mother it's always urgent but no, it wasn't work related."
"Alright, I'll be back in two hours."
"Where shall I say you will be?" She asked.
"Lunch meeting, with..." my daughter, he had been about to say. It was about to just flow right off his tongue. "some very important clients." He amended.
"Alright." She watched him leave. Yeah, he was gorgeous.
****
Liz ran the brush through her hair one last time.
The doorbell rang. This would be it.
"Hello, Max." She opened the door without looking. "Kyle."
"Good morning to you too, Liz, expecting someone?" He leaned against the doorpost.
"Yes, I do believe she was." Max stepped behind him. His gaze scanning the man in the doorway.
They eyed each other, each fighting for control. Neither was willing to back down.
"Alright you two, stop it." Liz stepped between them. "Kyle I really wished you had called, I had planned to go out with Max, before picking up Hannah."
"I've never had to call before, sweetheart." Liz winced at the pet name.
"I know, but I'd appreciate it if you did."
"Fine." He looked between them, if he wasn't careful Max was going to spring.
Kyle slid a protective hand around her waist and propelled her into the apartment, "Excuse us a moment, would you?" He shut the door.
Max glared, he knew Liz hated when she was directed somewhere especially in that way, if you wanted her to go somewhere, you asked her.
"Kyle what are you doing?" Liz exploded into rapid French.
"Trying to talk some sense into you." He said right back, just as angrily.
"He's going to hear you!"
"He can't understand anyway, what in the hell are you doing Liz? You hadn't told me you were planning on seeing him today."
"Kyle you've got skeletons in your closet, I've got mine." She stated in a calm voice, controlling herself.
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"Just guess Kyle, just guess." She didn't realize how angry she was at him for not telling her about Serena. "Now, before you get mad at me for not telling you something after two days, think about the plank in your eye before you take the splinter out of mine." She walked to the door and closed it softly behind her.
"We haven't gotten over each other Kyle, what makes you think she'll get over her daughter's father?" Serena stood in the doorway from her room, though she hadn't understood a word that had been said.
He glared at her before turning to walk back out the door.
"Sit, Kyle, we really need to talk." Serena pointed towards the couch.
"Alright." He knew it had been coming, he had asked her himself, hadn't he?
****
Max's eyes were still flaming when Liz walked out.
Alright, she knew how to deal with him once, how much could have changed?
She walked past him without saying anything knowing he would follow. She could feel his temper seething and his eyes burning into the back of her neck.
"I wasn't expecting him."
"Obviously." He tried to get a hold on his temper. He didn't need to be mad. He needed to think straight so he could talk rationally with Liz. "I'm sorry, Liz, I have no right to be angry with you."
That threw her off for a moment. She hadn't been expecting such an easy agreement. "Oh, well..." She didn't know what to say.
"Where'd you learn to speak French?"
"Kyle." She said smoothing down her pant leg. "I was thinking we could walk to pick her up, it's only down the street a little ways. Unless you had something else planned."
"No, I was just wanting to talk with you." He told her.
"Oh, well then." She didn't want to just start in on Hannah, but it looked like there really was no choice. "Well, nothing in particular?"
"No...well...us?"
"What about us?" She asked stunned.
"My relationship with Hannah." With you, he wanted to say.
"What about it?" Liz wondered. She knew he would never try to take Hannah away from her.
"Will you let one grow between us?" Would she allow it, even if his relationship with Liz was unable to be maintained.
"Of course." Hannah deserved to know her father. "If you promise not to hurt her." He knew he wouldn't not intentionally.
"I was thinking, that maybe one weekend, maybe, she could spend a weekend with me. Not anytime soon yet. She still doesn't know me well, but just once, if she didn't like it then never again."
Liz was stunned. No, not too fast. "We'll see." Same answer she gave to Hannah when the answer was no.
"Liz, don't do the 'we'll see' routine." He shook his head wondering if all mothers did that. "I hated when my mom gave me that answer."
"Sorry." She really wasn't. What better way to give herself longer to come up with an excuse? "Well, Hannah." Hannah has a heart condition that's going to be operated on in three weeks and then we'll see if she makes it out of surgery and then we'll see if she can go to your house. That wasn't going to work.
"Hannah's a little skittish around people she doesn't know. And she still likes to sleep in my bed, and she's never been away from me for longer than one night. And when she was, she was with Grandma Amy and Grandpa Jim." She rushed.
They walked into the schoolyard, but hung back a bit from the other parents so they can talk without the other mommy's hearing. "Who's Grandma Amy and Grandpa Jim?" He asked.
"Kyle's parents." She realized how that sounded and regretted it the second she said it. "That didn't..."
"I understand he's been around, so have they."
"No, it's not like that, Max. They've been around since Hannah's birth." Liz tried to defend herself. "When TOP workers came, and I was scared." She stopped. Dear God, she had gone too far.
"The who and why?" He asked turning her towards him.
Liz stared into his eyes then down to where her hand was holding her facing him. His grip was firm but gentle. She couldn't have moved if her life depended on it, yet she felt nothing except fire spreading throughout her body.
She was saved when she heard a familiar voice. "Liz, hello!"
Max dropped his arm and wanted to glare at the other woman with the two- year-old on her hip.
"Hi, Melissa." Liz turned quickly to the woman. "Conner."
"Hi!" Conner waved.
"Max, this is Melissa, and her son Conner. Mel, this is Max."
"Hello." Melissa eyed him and spotted the similarities to Hannah and connected the dots. "You must be Hannah's father."
Max caught Liz's eye on what to do. She gave a shrug and looked at the ground.
"Technically, yes." He answered.
"Oh." Melissa cursed herself again and shifted Conner on her hip.
"Mommy!" They were all saved from the awkward situation. There were about twenty-five of the same shouts but Max watched in fascination as Liz quickly picked out the one belonging to Hannah and turned towards her.
"Hello, Hannah bean." Liz scooped her up and squeezed her to her.
"Hi." Hannah said shyly when she saw Max. Her eyes lit up. "What are you doing here?"
"Your mother thought it would be nice if I came along, if you don't mind."
"No!" Then she turned back to Liz. "Can Nat come over to the apartment?"
"Not today, we're going to stay with Max and then you have a doctor's appointment." Liz explained.
"Oh." She didn't like the thought of the doctor's office, and laid her head on her mother's shoulder, suddenly becoming sad.
"I'm sorry, maybe another day."
"Yeah, maybe another day. Come on, Natalie." Melissa turned away with Natalie in tow, as she waved bye to Hannah.
"See you tomorrow."
"Bye, Nat." Hannah called. Darn doctors. "No, doctor's, Mommy, I breathe fine." She took a deep breath to prove it.
She coughed after that and Liz frowned. So did Max.
Was Hannah sick? He wondered to himself. If she was, why hadn't Liz told him? But Hannah's knowing of the doctor, and easy acceptance made him doubtful that this was not a temporary thing.
"Someone going to fill me in?"
Liz knew she should have told him, before he found out. Now, he was going to be angry, which he had every right to be.
"My heart's sick." Hannah said helpfully.
Liz groaned inwardly.
Max raised an eyebrow and folded his arms over his chest much as Hannah did when she wanted to know something.
"Come back to the apartment, and I'll tell you." Liz said.
Max nodded and began walking back.