Elladan/Elrohir VS Merry/Pippin
Act I: Peg Purgatory
A/N: Watch out, I'm listening to Aqua and Tripod. This can't be good. 32 reviews and still climbing! Yay! *is happy* Am v. happy. Wish I'd thought of the Very Secret Diaries first . . . also, am high on salt and vinegar - not good, I think. The statue thing is something I just had while I was typing a number of chapters at once. You'll find it mentioned in two other of my stories if you read 'em. *winkwinknudgenudge*
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Merry and Pippin could be found hiding.
Which I know is probably not really a surprise for our readers as they have found the two of the lovable hobbits hiding from some livid man/thing/elf that is turning the household of Rivendell upside down in their search for justice.
At the moment it was, again, the twin sons of Elrond himself.
Merry and Pippin were on the roofs of Rivendell, their hands busy with the machinations that would eventually carry out their ultimate prank.
"The prank of all pranks is at hand!" cried Merry, lifting the contraption aloft.
Pippin's eyes filled with wonder as he beheld the most promising object he had ever thought to see.
"But will it work?" he asked his friend.
Merry shook his head at Pippin.
"You must have faith, friend. It will work," Merry grinned and the setting sun's rays glinted in his eyes and teeth, "It will work very well. Now all we need are a few finishing touches . . ."
A sun also caught the brilliance shining from their carefully wrought piece of mischief. It seemed to smile merrily at them and encourage them that this must be the best plan the two of them had ever hatched.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
The twins were just then, complaining to their father.
"But father, they . . ."
"No more of this!" commanded Elrond, he had soon become exasperated with his sons' antics and the pranks of the two hobbits.
"You will ignore them, you will not endeavour to find a way to venge yourself."
"But . . . our hair!" cried Elladan forlornly.
"No buts! I am sick and tired of the four of you turning my house into some sort of a crazy, untamed . . ." their father struggled for words in his fury.
His face had slowly turned beet red, noted Elrohir, but he tacitly decided not to mention this fact, or let his joy of seeing it be revealed on his face.
"Father, you surely cannot demand that we do nothing while they run amok in your household," Elrohir reasoned amiably.
"I don't care anymore! I will deal with them momentarily. You have no reason to take these matters into your own hands. Do you know what they did to Arwen this morning?"
The twins looked at each other and then back to their father, shaking their heads.
"They led her to believe that a blemish had appeared upon her nose, it took all of my and Aragorn's assurances to convince her that it was but a trick of those halflings and keep her away from the murderous feelings she beheld for the two."
Elrhir couln't help it, and snorted.
Elladan stupidly took his brother's lead.
"Bet Aragorn helped a lot." He nudged his brother suggestingly.
Elrond threw up his hands despairingly.
"Here I am, trying to talk some sense into you and you throw it back into my face! Get out! Both of you! And don't let me hear of any more disturbances!"
The brothers walked out and as soon as they were out of hearing they collapsed into helpless laughter.
"I was still thinking Aragorn when he said 'disturbances," eruptedElrohir between a fit of giggles.
Elladan nodded breathlessly.
"Come on, I'm not going to look like this before the Prince."
"Good heavens, no! We'd better get going, I'd hate to have him see us like this. We'd never hear the end of it from the prissy mouth of his."
The twins took off, heading downstairs, unaware of the mischief-makers sitting above them on the roof.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Merry finished off the finishing touches on the contraption.
"How are we going to get them close enough for it, but?" asked Pippin, gazing wonderingly at the object in question.
Merry thought for a moment.
"When they're asleep?"
"They still lock us in our rooms after dark. I checked last night. Plus, how would we know if they're asleep or not?"
"What do you mean, Pip?"
"Well, elves sleep with their eyes open."
"Do they? Where'd you learn that, then?"
"I noticed a bit of drool coming out of Elrond's mouth when we were trying to explain to him that we'd meant to go fishing but the twins had upset our plans and that . . ."
"Yes, yes, I remember. He was asleep?"
"I'd know that blank look anywhere - Gandalf uses it when the Sackville- Bagginses are lecturing him, and I'm sure I've seen Bilbo doing it a fair bit too."
"Hmmm." Merry mulled over this new piece of information.
"Do you think Gandalf would do it?" he asked his cousin.
Pippin gave him a fair imitation of Elrond's eyebrows.
"Ok then, scrap that plan."
They waited in silence together. Silence, apart from Pippin doing a 'tick- tock' noise on the roof of his mouth. He was about to accompany with a feet drumming the roof in a drum roll when Merry yelled at him to shut up.
So then, they waited in silence together.
Pippin started whistling the twilight music.
"Hey, Pip?"
Pippin broke off in his whistling.
"Yeah, what?"
"You've given me an idea."
"Aliens are too far fetched. They wouldn't believe some LGM's telling them to . . ."
"No, no! We've got keep them dazzled, spiff 'em up with the deer in headlights look somehow . . ."
"How?" Pippin questioned carefully.
"Their hair . . . they would . . . hmmm . . ."
Merry went into a thoughtful silence as Pippin fidgeted. His cousin would think of something and he was sure he was getting a glimmer of what he was planning soon enough.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Elladan and Elrohir were, at that moment directly below them albeit, a few floors down and several rooms to the right.
"My hair! However shall I get it back to what it once was?" moaned Elladan.
Elrohir meanwhile picked up one of the many magazines the salon provided and flicked through it lazily.
"I say, Arwen's not top notch anymore. Legolas seems to have bypassed her to the "sexiest elf" in Middle Earth. She'll be impossible after this, I'm afraid."
"Forget Arwen!" whined Elladan, "My hair! What about my hair?"
Elrohir grinned at his twin.
"Would you stop blathering on, it'll grow back."
"It took me three centuries to get it like this!"
"Then wait a few more centuries and it'll be as good as new," retorted Elrohir, "Now, I was thinking that these little halflings really need to be taught a lesson. We can't let them going around with all these pranks in mind terrorising half of Rivendell while the other half are laughing so hard their locks fall out."
"Will you stop it about the hair? It's bad enough as it is!" moaned Elladan.
"Oh, quit it. Who cares about your hair? It looks fine."
"I care about my hair!"
"There's your problem. Stop caring and it'll get better more quickly."
"Will it?" a faint hope gleamed in Elladan's eyes.
"Trust me. But, as I was saying, we must get these halflings to repent for there sins."
"The one they did with Arwen was funny, but."
"I suppose, how they did it with her mirror was ingenious, I admit. But our own pranks on our sweet little sister were much more . . ."
"Ingenious?"
"Exactly! And what's more, they seem to be stealing our mantel of people to avoid at all costs."
"You know, I think your right about that. That princeling from the east actually tried to hide behind me the other day. I wish it had been him who'd lost the hair. I want my hair back!"
Elrohir groaned. He'd thought he'd almost got through to his brother, evidently not.
"How about we do something to them that'll make them squeal with horror as much as you did when you lost your hair?" Elladan was so busy trying to think about what they could do, he missed the jab about his non- masculinity.
"We must get though to them through something they hold dear to their hearts . . ."
"Food! They love food, we'll starve them!"
"Elladan, this is a prank, not torture."
"Oh."
"What we need is something that will hold them from doing anything to us ever again."
"But what about other people?"
"We can do with a laugh or two every now and then."
Elladan grinned.
The twins settled back and started tossing up ideas between them, trying to think up, what Merry and Pippin would hate to lose. Something they would hate to have defiled in anyway . . .
Elrohir looked to Elladan.
Elladan glanced at Elrohir.
And each saw in the other's eyes a plan was beginning to form . . .
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Merry and Pippin watched their quarry lean back into a hair rinsing bowl, their heads being massaged cautiously by a female attendant.
Merry and Pippin grinned at each other as the attendant left the two elves to soak their head in the carefully perfumed water.
The twins' faces were covered with facial masks, their eyes were closed, relaxingly.
Merry and Pippin took a deep breath and went forward.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
A/N: I'll leave it till the next chappy, eh? I have an optometrist appointment now, and if I don't update now, it'll be another week before I get round to it. Hope you enjoyed it, alls!
Oh yes, one thing . . .
*falls on knees hands raises pleadingly to the sky*
Reviews! Please! It is the food of fanfiction! The energy, the inspiration, I call for reviews! Pleasing or otherwise! Please! I bed of you . . .
*crawls into foetal position*
THERE THERE
Thank you, Shaitan.
IT'LL BE OK
I don't know . . . *clings*
*GLARES AT READERS* SEE WHAT IT HAS DONE TO HER? SHE SUFFERS REVIEW WITHDRAWAL SYMPTOMS
*looks up to Shaitan* It's not fair, no one likes me anymore . . .
THERE THERE *PATS COMFORTINGLY*
*sob*
Act I: Peg Purgatory
A/N: Watch out, I'm listening to Aqua and Tripod. This can't be good. 32 reviews and still climbing! Yay! *is happy* Am v. happy. Wish I'd thought of the Very Secret Diaries first . . . also, am high on salt and vinegar - not good, I think. The statue thing is something I just had while I was typing a number of chapters at once. You'll find it mentioned in two other of my stories if you read 'em. *winkwinknudgenudge*
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Merry and Pippin could be found hiding.
Which I know is probably not really a surprise for our readers as they have found the two of the lovable hobbits hiding from some livid man/thing/elf that is turning the household of Rivendell upside down in their search for justice.
At the moment it was, again, the twin sons of Elrond himself.
Merry and Pippin were on the roofs of Rivendell, their hands busy with the machinations that would eventually carry out their ultimate prank.
"The prank of all pranks is at hand!" cried Merry, lifting the contraption aloft.
Pippin's eyes filled with wonder as he beheld the most promising object he had ever thought to see.
"But will it work?" he asked his friend.
Merry shook his head at Pippin.
"You must have faith, friend. It will work," Merry grinned and the setting sun's rays glinted in his eyes and teeth, "It will work very well. Now all we need are a few finishing touches . . ."
A sun also caught the brilliance shining from their carefully wrought piece of mischief. It seemed to smile merrily at them and encourage them that this must be the best plan the two of them had ever hatched.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
The twins were just then, complaining to their father.
"But father, they . . ."
"No more of this!" commanded Elrond, he had soon become exasperated with his sons' antics and the pranks of the two hobbits.
"You will ignore them, you will not endeavour to find a way to venge yourself."
"But . . . our hair!" cried Elladan forlornly.
"No buts! I am sick and tired of the four of you turning my house into some sort of a crazy, untamed . . ." their father struggled for words in his fury.
His face had slowly turned beet red, noted Elrohir, but he tacitly decided not to mention this fact, or let his joy of seeing it be revealed on his face.
"Father, you surely cannot demand that we do nothing while they run amok in your household," Elrohir reasoned amiably.
"I don't care anymore! I will deal with them momentarily. You have no reason to take these matters into your own hands. Do you know what they did to Arwen this morning?"
The twins looked at each other and then back to their father, shaking their heads.
"They led her to believe that a blemish had appeared upon her nose, it took all of my and Aragorn's assurances to convince her that it was but a trick of those halflings and keep her away from the murderous feelings she beheld for the two."
Elrhir couln't help it, and snorted.
Elladan stupidly took his brother's lead.
"Bet Aragorn helped a lot." He nudged his brother suggestingly.
Elrond threw up his hands despairingly.
"Here I am, trying to talk some sense into you and you throw it back into my face! Get out! Both of you! And don't let me hear of any more disturbances!"
The brothers walked out and as soon as they were out of hearing they collapsed into helpless laughter.
"I was still thinking Aragorn when he said 'disturbances," eruptedElrohir between a fit of giggles.
Elladan nodded breathlessly.
"Come on, I'm not going to look like this before the Prince."
"Good heavens, no! We'd better get going, I'd hate to have him see us like this. We'd never hear the end of it from the prissy mouth of his."
The twins took off, heading downstairs, unaware of the mischief-makers sitting above them on the roof.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Merry finished off the finishing touches on the contraption.
"How are we going to get them close enough for it, but?" asked Pippin, gazing wonderingly at the object in question.
Merry thought for a moment.
"When they're asleep?"
"They still lock us in our rooms after dark. I checked last night. Plus, how would we know if they're asleep or not?"
"What do you mean, Pip?"
"Well, elves sleep with their eyes open."
"Do they? Where'd you learn that, then?"
"I noticed a bit of drool coming out of Elrond's mouth when we were trying to explain to him that we'd meant to go fishing but the twins had upset our plans and that . . ."
"Yes, yes, I remember. He was asleep?"
"I'd know that blank look anywhere - Gandalf uses it when the Sackville- Bagginses are lecturing him, and I'm sure I've seen Bilbo doing it a fair bit too."
"Hmmm." Merry mulled over this new piece of information.
"Do you think Gandalf would do it?" he asked his cousin.
Pippin gave him a fair imitation of Elrond's eyebrows.
"Ok then, scrap that plan."
They waited in silence together. Silence, apart from Pippin doing a 'tick- tock' noise on the roof of his mouth. He was about to accompany with a feet drumming the roof in a drum roll when Merry yelled at him to shut up.
So then, they waited in silence together.
Pippin started whistling the twilight music.
"Hey, Pip?"
Pippin broke off in his whistling.
"Yeah, what?"
"You've given me an idea."
"Aliens are too far fetched. They wouldn't believe some LGM's telling them to . . ."
"No, no! We've got keep them dazzled, spiff 'em up with the deer in headlights look somehow . . ."
"How?" Pippin questioned carefully.
"Their hair . . . they would . . . hmmm . . ."
Merry went into a thoughtful silence as Pippin fidgeted. His cousin would think of something and he was sure he was getting a glimmer of what he was planning soon enough.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Elladan and Elrohir were, at that moment directly below them albeit, a few floors down and several rooms to the right.
"My hair! However shall I get it back to what it once was?" moaned Elladan.
Elrohir meanwhile picked up one of the many magazines the salon provided and flicked through it lazily.
"I say, Arwen's not top notch anymore. Legolas seems to have bypassed her to the "sexiest elf" in Middle Earth. She'll be impossible after this, I'm afraid."
"Forget Arwen!" whined Elladan, "My hair! What about my hair?"
Elrohir grinned at his twin.
"Would you stop blathering on, it'll grow back."
"It took me three centuries to get it like this!"
"Then wait a few more centuries and it'll be as good as new," retorted Elrohir, "Now, I was thinking that these little halflings really need to be taught a lesson. We can't let them going around with all these pranks in mind terrorising half of Rivendell while the other half are laughing so hard their locks fall out."
"Will you stop it about the hair? It's bad enough as it is!" moaned Elladan.
"Oh, quit it. Who cares about your hair? It looks fine."
"I care about my hair!"
"There's your problem. Stop caring and it'll get better more quickly."
"Will it?" a faint hope gleamed in Elladan's eyes.
"Trust me. But, as I was saying, we must get these halflings to repent for there sins."
"The one they did with Arwen was funny, but."
"I suppose, how they did it with her mirror was ingenious, I admit. But our own pranks on our sweet little sister were much more . . ."
"Ingenious?"
"Exactly! And what's more, they seem to be stealing our mantel of people to avoid at all costs."
"You know, I think your right about that. That princeling from the east actually tried to hide behind me the other day. I wish it had been him who'd lost the hair. I want my hair back!"
Elrohir groaned. He'd thought he'd almost got through to his brother, evidently not.
"How about we do something to them that'll make them squeal with horror as much as you did when you lost your hair?" Elladan was so busy trying to think about what they could do, he missed the jab about his non- masculinity.
"We must get though to them through something they hold dear to their hearts . . ."
"Food! They love food, we'll starve them!"
"Elladan, this is a prank, not torture."
"Oh."
"What we need is something that will hold them from doing anything to us ever again."
"But what about other people?"
"We can do with a laugh or two every now and then."
Elladan grinned.
The twins settled back and started tossing up ideas between them, trying to think up, what Merry and Pippin would hate to lose. Something they would hate to have defiled in anyway . . .
Elrohir looked to Elladan.
Elladan glanced at Elrohir.
And each saw in the other's eyes a plan was beginning to form . . .
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Merry and Pippin watched their quarry lean back into a hair rinsing bowl, their heads being massaged cautiously by a female attendant.
Merry and Pippin grinned at each other as the attendant left the two elves to soak their head in the carefully perfumed water.
The twins' faces were covered with facial masks, their eyes were closed, relaxingly.
Merry and Pippin took a deep breath and went forward.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
A/N: I'll leave it till the next chappy, eh? I have an optometrist appointment now, and if I don't update now, it'll be another week before I get round to it. Hope you enjoyed it, alls!
Oh yes, one thing . . .
*falls on knees hands raises pleadingly to the sky*
Reviews! Please! It is the food of fanfiction! The energy, the inspiration, I call for reviews! Pleasing or otherwise! Please! I bed of you . . .
*crawls into foetal position*
THERE THERE
Thank you, Shaitan.
IT'LL BE OK
I don't know . . . *clings*
*GLARES AT READERS* SEE WHAT IT HAS DONE TO HER? SHE SUFFERS REVIEW WITHDRAWAL SYMPTOMS
*looks up to Shaitan* It's not fair, no one likes me anymore . . .
THERE THERE *PATS COMFORTINGLY*
*sob*