FALLEN
CHAPTER 3 – BRING ME TO LIFE
Anime the Fallen Angel
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"I'm Omi. What's your name?
"...Aya"
Aya.... That's a nice name...
"Well...er.... Tanaka isn't here anymore..."
"Not him. Your friend. She died yesterday, didn't she."
How did you know? You said you heard rumours.... but.... How?
"You're simply lying to yourself. You're hiding."
Was I that transparent? Was I really and truly? How could you tell?
"An apology? For what? For showing you the truth? Can't you take it?"
No... I couldn't take the truth. But why did you concern yourself with it? Why? Why? Why? Who are you....
Omi stared at his ceiling from his bed, his mind whirring. He tried grasping for answers, but he might as well try and grab steam with his bare hands. Omi curled up, staring at the clothes that were scattered all over the room from when he came home. Now, only in his night clothes, Omi found no refuge in his little sanctuary. He felt cold. Nothingness in his core from the past four days.
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How can you see through my eyes like open doors?
Leading you down into my core
Where I've become so numb without a soul
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Restlessly, Omi tried turning over and forced himself to rest.
******
"And if we add the first generation DNA into the nitrogen fourteen environment and obtain a second generation that produces equal volumes of light and medium genetic material, what can we determine from this experiment?"
The teacher glanced over her class momentarily, seeing no one offering to answer the question. She decided to ask one of her reliable students who could be guaranteed to answer correctly.
"Tsukiyono. What kind of replication can we find in this experiment?"
Omi squinted a little at the blackboard, trying to make sense of the chalky writing and diagrams. He glanced down at his book, his own handwriting swimming before his eyes.
"Er....."
"Omi?"
Omi looked up and was face to face with his teacher. She looked concerned and placed her hand on his forehead.
"You don't look very well, Omi. Is everything alright?"
"Mariko-san! Omi had to speak to the police yesterday about Oaka."
"Oh... that's right..."
Omi cringed a little, feeling almost the entire classroom staring at him with pity. He hated it. It wasn't warm, or caring. Later, Mariko-san decided that Omi wasn't fit to remain in school and sent him home.
"Due to shock." was Mariko-san's reasoning.
This was how he was now sitting in Yohji's car, being driven back to their shared apartment/ flowershop.
"I told you Omi. Myself and Ken; you should've listened. You need your rest. Finding and having a wounded woman die in your arms is nothing to take lightly. You can't assume everything will be alright..."
Thank you for being so tactful, Yohji-kun... "I know. And for the tenth and final time, I'm sorry, Yohji-kun..." Omi replied quietly, staring out of the window.
Yohji extinguished his cigarette and glanced apologetically at the younger. "I'm not helping, am I? Gomen ne."
Immediately upon returning in the Koneko, Ken bustled the quiet boy up into his room with a mug of hot chocolate, ordering Omi to rest. Omi simply sat on his bed when Ken left, staring at the floor. Omi found his mind wandering to a certain red head...
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My spirit sleeping somewhere cold
Until you found it there and lead it back home
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******
Omi frowned and lifted his legs, lying flat out on his bed. Aya... Look what you've done to me. How do you do it? Make me see what I don't want to? And make me feels so empty, but so fulfilled? What is it about you? Turning over, Omi now stared outside his window, trying to file his mind into order. Omi quietly thought about Aya. His dark red hair... His violet eyes that can burn or freeze. The way his throat moved when he swallowed. The way he walked; so much like a predator, strutting sexily and broody...
What am I thinking!? How can I!? I loved Oaka, and now I'm thinking about Aya? Possibly the man who hurt her! It makes no sense at all. Why should I think of him at all, let alone develop a crush on him... Omi bolted up, shocked. He couldn't believe he let his mind delude him so much.
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Wake me up inside
Wake me up inside
Call my name and save me from the dark
Bid my blood to run before I come undone
Save me from the nothing I've become
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Fancy him!? How could I fancy him!? I'm not... not gay, am I? How can I be? I had a crush... loved, Oaka. How can that be? 'sides, he made it perfectly clear that he doesn't like me. I'm weak, he's strong. He's beautiful, I'm worthless. I'm not worthy, and he's admirable... Wha... How?
Confused, Omi sub-consciously grabbed his work apron and ventured down in his school shirt and pants. The minute he walked into the Koneko, Ken stopped Omi.
"Omi, what are you doing down with your apron on? You should be resting."
Erm.... "I couldn't just lie there, Ken-kun. I need to do something before I go mad..." Literally...
"Omi..."
"Please, Ken? Just for two or three hours? Until the rush is over."
"One and a half." Ken resigned, sighing. "but promise me you would go straight up, okay?"
"Hai. Thanks, Ken."
Yohji sent Ken a questioning look when he finally spotted Omi watering some of the flower displays. Ken shook his head before suddenly being surrounded by a crowd of girls. The rush hour began...
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Now that I know what I'm without
You can't just leave me
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An hour and three quarters of another later, Ken managed to break free of the school girls and herded Omi back upstairs. Omi collapsed onto his bed, gasping from the hard work he had just done. The girls didn't hoard him as much as they used to though, thankfully. Omi pulled out of his pocket a delicate little flower he managed to sneak up. An iris. Taking a deep breath, Omi smelt its scent. He wasn't sure, but he thought Aya's name meant Iris. Taking in the smell, Omi let his mind wander freely.
This is stupid. Here I am, smelling an iris, thinking about him. Am I really asking for trouble? What was I thinking!? I'm so stupid. I want to get over him; think of Oaka. Oaka... Why did she have to die? Wonder when's the funeral... Should I go? Do I have the right to? I bet her parents don't think so. One look at me, and they probably would send me away. I'm useless... A florist, hardly able to support himself, currently struggling through school, thinking about the one who...
Growling, Omi sat up and frowned, angry with himself. He leaned forward, staring at the flower in his hand as if it suddenly sprouted another flower head in front of him. Sadly, Omi smelt the flower again. I think I know why I like Aya... He makes me feel alive...
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Breathe into me and make me real
Bring me to life
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******
Stupid stupid stupid! Yohji-kun and Ken-kun would've realised I'm gone by now!
Omi fidgeted from foot to foot, arguing with himself. The nightclub he was sure he would find Aya in was in front of him. Omi looked down at his clothes. A black cotton shirt with red lining, black pants and shoes. No spikes or collar. Just a simple silver chain and stud. I'm not looking to impress. I don't want to impress. I shouldn't impress...
Reciting his mantra to himself, Omi walked through the threshold. Blaring music, bright lights and heat hit him instantaneously, making Omi nearly lose grip on what he was thinking. Find Aya, get over him, leave. Got that, Tsukiyono!? Find, erase, leave.
"You're back."
Omi whirled around and was face to face with Aya. The red head held a cool glare against Omi's wide eyed stare.
"You were looking for me."
Omi nodded slowly. He'd come to accept that he couldn't hide much from Aya. Omi was relieved to find though, that his voice hadn't abandoned him. "We need to talk."
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Frozen inside without your touch without your love
Darling only you are the life among the dead
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******
Omi insisted on buying the drinks this time, even though he knew he should be saving. A bottle of beer each later, Omi found them a table in a corner where they could talk without trouble. Aya sat indifferently, looking at Omi through slits for eyes, waiting for him to say his piece. Omi gulped down a mouthful of beer. Nothing like a bit of Dutch courage... Taking a deep breath, Omi launched straight into his speech.
"I want to know more about you. Why you come to this club, how long and what for. I want to know why you saved me from Tanaka, how you really knew about Oaka and why you were so concerned last night. I need to know. I want to know. I have to know..."
"So you can get over me?"
Damn my transparentness... "That obvious?" Omi asked, shocked.
"Just a bit. Your desperation gave it away."
Desperate!? Omi blushed and turned his face away, taking another swig from his bottle. Aya did the same, more slowly. Omi centred himself and faced Aya again.
"Well?"
Aya waited for a while before making his cool eyes meet Omi. Aya leaned on the tabletop, moving closer to Omi. Omi leaned back a little, trying to keep his mind on breaking his fascination with the man in front of him.
"You want to get over me? Then let me give you reason to. I killed him. I hated Tanaka and so I killed him. You were merely in the way. You saw how I killed him?"
Omi nodded slowly, nervous. "H...hai... You cut his neck open."
"Not quite, but close enough. As for your girlfriend; I don't know and I don't care. For all I care, she could have been messing in things she shouldn't have."
Omi couldn't help but keep his eye contact with Aya, watching as Aya's eyes began to smoulder with each syllable.
"I'm a very dangerous man, kid. More dangerous than you could ever imagine. I could kill you, right here, right now, and still walk out without people stopping me. I could do to you what I did to Tanaka, and no one would know. I'm a murderer, kid, and if you want to live, you'd stay well away."
Aya sat back, and took a swig of beer, observing Omi for a reaction. Omi looked down at his own bottle of beer, only half empty right now. His heart beat faster as he realised something during Aya's talk. The stare Aya gave Omi.... It felt exactly the same way as the stares he felt for the past few nights whenever he came into the club.
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All this time I can't believe I couldn't see
Kept in the dark but you were there in front of me
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"You've been watching me, haven't you?"
"Why do you say that?"
"I felt your stare. Don't deny it. Please."
Aya frowned. The kid wasn't trying very hard to try and get over him.
"Not going the right way for getting over me kid..."
"I know..."
"Why?"
"I...I don't know. I find you.... fascinating, and I don't know why."
"I told you that I can easily kill..."
"But only if you have a good reason, right? You killed Tanaka because he was assaulting me."
"And I could kill you for annoying me."
"Not a good enough reason for you, though."
"Don't talk about me like you know me kid, because..."
"Because I don't? Okay, so I don't know you. Now you know how it feels to have someone talk about you like that. But part of me wants to.... know."
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I've been sleeping a thousand years it seems
Got to open my eyes to everything
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Aya stood up suddenly, frowning. Omi could see from his whole body that Aya was not happy, and for a moment, truly thought Aya was going to kill him.
"Forget about me, kid. Forget about me. You're not worth my time."
"A...Aya..."
"Forget it, kid."
Aya turned away from Omi and started walking. Omi stared at his still half empty bottle, depressed. Rather than cure his obsession, he made it stronger. Now, he felt he couldn't get Aya out of his mind. Drinking down the rest of his beer, Omi stood and left the club. Unexpectedly, he found Aya leaning against a wall outside. Taking this final chance, Omi walked up to Aya, head held high.
"You care, don't you?"
"Care?"
"You care. You care that I'm getting close. You care that I was hurt yesterday. You cared that Tanaka was going to hurt me and you took me home. If you didn't care, you wouldn't talk to me, or save me; right?"
Aya just stared at Omi with a cool and bored look. He snorted quietly before folding his arms.
"I was bored. You were pathetic. I thought that by saving you that night, you could've learnt something. I was wrong. There's nothing more for you in me."
With that, Aya pushed away from the wall and walked away, leaving a broken Omi standing alone. There's gotta be more than this... Aya.... Please.
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Without a thought without a voice without a soul
Don't let me die here there must be something more
Bring me to life
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