A/N: Okay so hey everyone. I know I promised I would be faster and technically I was faster then last time. Just not super fast. Okay well here is the next chapter. Chapter 19. ENJOY!

Distribution: Go ahead and spread it around if you think it's good. Just tell me where my baby's going first.

Disclaimer: I don't own the characters.

Spoilers: None

Chapter 19:

Spike didn't know what he was doing. He didn't know why he agreed to have dinner with Dru. The only thing that he could think was that he had a total relapse in judgment and was temporarily insane. He said yes!

He said yes and then proceeded to discuss dinner reservations with someone his family had deemed the 'skanky ho bitch from hell'. Of course he couldn't disagree with them. She wasn't the best person for him and he learned that the hard way, but yet here he was glutton for more punishment.

Dru suggested they go to some place in LA that he'd never heard of before. When he said he'd never heard of the restaurant she laughed, smiled that wicked grin that had made Spike fall for her in the first place and proceeded to write the directions on one of his papers concerning the case. She waved bye to him and told him to meet her at the restaurant at seven.

Spike, like the biggest retard in the world, decided that it would be a good idea to have a friendly dinner with his ex-girlfriend that cheated on him for three solid months. He lit another cigarette. He'd been smoking like a chimney since he got back to his apartment. He hadn't been much better on the car ride to the big fancy restaurant and he certainly wasn't getting any better as he waited outside the place hoping that it was all just a bad dream.

Well I best just get moving. It won't be that bad. I mean it's not like she' going to spray me with paralyzing liquid or anything like that. Just get out of the car, walk calmly inside and wait for her to show up. If she hasn't already that is. Spike thought to himself as he stepped out of his car and snuffed out his cigarette. It was going to be a long evening.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"Wow that's harsh. Is Dawn okay?" Oz asked.

Buffy, Willow, Andrew and Warren had just gotten done telling him what had happened in the courtroom earlier. All four of them looked beyond a little drained and Oz could understand why.

"She's better. We went out for some ice cream and she calmed down a bit. God, it was so hard to listen to her up there and know that I just had to sit and wait for something to happen." Buffy said.

"Yeah, but everything is good now. Spike won the case and Riley's going to jail pending what the judge says." Andrew said.

"Yeah, but scars like that don't just go away, Andy. I mean Dawn and Buffy have to live with that pain for the rest of there lives." Willow said.

"Oh way to be support-o gal." Buffy said sarcastically.

"Sorry, Buff, but sometimes no matter how much you want the pain to go away it'll still be there. It's gonna heal with time, trust me on that one. Dawn just needs a little time to realize what happened today was of the good." Willow said.

"Yeah, poor thing she was so worn out from crying she fell asleep right away. I sure hope she'll be okay soon." Warren said.

"I'm sure she will be. We just have to act positive. We just have to be positive." Andrew said.

"I can do positive. I can be positive." Buffy said.

"Of course you can be positive. Riley's gone and now you have your life back. You can do anything you want now." Willow said.

"Yeah anything I want right now includes talking to my friends and eating a lot of ice cream." Buffy said.

"Well, we're all here, where's the ice cream." Oz asked.

"Oh, I thought we'd keep the ice cream for later. You know after we've actually eaten dinner." Buffy said.

"The Chinese food should be here any minute. I swear they said ten minutes and that was like five minutes ago." Andrew said.

"Okay then while we're waiting Oz and I have an announcement to make." Willow said standing up and facing her friends. Oz was immediately at her side and gave her hand a gentle squeeze.

"Really, what is it Wills?" Buffy asked.

"Well, we were waiting for the right time to tell all of you and I figured tonight was as good a time as any. I think we could all use some happy news." Willow said.

"Okay Willow, get on with it." Andrew said impatiently.

"Alright. Geez, respect the narrative flow much. Okay as I was saying I thought tonight would be the right time. Okay we'll there's no way to beat around the bush with this so I guess here it goes… I'm pregnant." Willow said.

"Oh my God! That's great. I'm so happy for you!" Buffy said as she stood up to walk over to her best friend. Buffy hugged her tightly. The guys stood up and shook hands offering congratulations to Oz.

Andrew hugged Willow after Buffy walked over to Oz to hug him. Oz was a bit surprised when Buffy hugged him, but got over the shock quickly. After the hug fest was over, Buffy pulled Willow over to sit next to her and took Willow's hand.

"How far along are you?" Buffy asked.

"Only a few months." Willow answered.

"That's so great. God, I'm so happy for the two of you. You're going to go and start your own family. Know that I'm always here to baby-sit." Buffy said.

"Well since this is good news time. I guess me and Warren have some news of our own."

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"Um… I'm looking for Drusilla Collins. Is she here yet?" Spike asked the hostess. The blonde looked up at him, gave him a small smile and looked back down at the papers in front of her.

"Yes, Miss Collins is here. Would you like me to show you to your seat?" The hostess asked.

"Sure." Spike said and followed as the girl took him to a very secluded part of the restaurant.

He saw Dru sitting there with her long brown hair down and wavy. She was sitting there drinking water and looking very professional in one of her power suits. Spike sat down in the chair across from her.

"Hello Dru." He said in a tone he hoped wasn't dry.

She put up her finger signaling she wasn't ready to say anything and finished taking a sip of her water. She put the cup down gulped down her water and cleared her throat.

"Evening Spike. How have you been?" Dru asked in a tone that Spike thought could be sarcastic, but he couldn't really tell. It was a loaded question. How had Spike been?

"Got a life time?" Spike asked in a somewhat joking matter.

"That bad, huh? Well I'm here to listen." Dru said.

"Yeah you're here to listen. That's a load of shit." Spike said wondering if the waitress would be there soon. He could really use a drink.

"Oh, low blow. Okay so I'm not the best person to be helping you with your problems." Dru said. Spike snorted and began to chug his water wishing it were something else.

"Maybe because I most likely caused some of them, but I guess I just thought we could be… I don't know… friends." Dru said staring at Spike with those darn hopeful blue eyes.

"We can never be friends Dru. I don't trust you." Spike said.

"Understandable. I cheated on you and made your life miserable for those last three months. And yeah, I'm not any different now, but I am sorry that it happened that way." Dru said.

Spike studied her expression. She had a nervous twitchy look that wasn't exactly common on her face. She was always the cool causal powerful attorney. This was a new look on her.

"Why are we really here Dru?" Spike asked.

"Other then to celebrate your outstanding win and my horrible defeat… I don't really know. I'm here to say I'm sorry I guess. Sorry that I caused you so much pain and sorry that I made you go against your family's wishes. I know you care about them more then anything. I'm just… sorry." Dru finished.

"Okay I'll buy that for now. I still think there's another reason." Spike said.

"So what do you want to eat? It's on me." Dru said in a friendly tone.

"I don't know. Haven't looked at the menu yet." Spike said picking up the menu and taking a look at it. There were only fancy food items and Spike didn't know what to choose.

"Sorry that it's all fancy. Only places I know here are fancy. Schmoozing with the clients." Dru explained.

"It's okay. I'll have the chicken Parmesan." Spike said.

"Sounds good. I already know what I want." Dru said.

"Okay, now answer me this question, Dru."

"What is it?"

"Why were you Riley's lawyer?"

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"What's the news, Andrew? The suspense is killing me." Willow said.

"Yes we're all on the edge of our seats." Buffy said. Oz nodded his head vigorously at the girl's statements.

"Andy, I'm not exactly sure we should tell them right now. I mean it isn't written in stone or anything." Warren said.

"Yeah, but most likely right. Besides everyone has such good news and I want to be involved." Andrew said.

"Okay, okay. I'll let you tell them only because you look like a keyed up puppy right now." Warren said. Andrew squeaked and hugged Warren close.

Warren held him close to him and even though the set in his jaw said annoyed, his eyes said 'I can't believe I love this dork, but I do.'

"Okay enough with the hugs. Tell us already or I will be forced to use… force." Willow said wishing she had a better ending then that.

"Okay well after much deliberation and arguing and consideration, Warren and I have decided to move here to Sunnydale." Andrew said in that giddy tone that just screamed happy.

"Oh… wow… that's great, but what about your fear of small towns?" Buffy asked to Warren.

"I don't know. I guess I'm putting it on the back shelf. I mean we both kind of need a break from big city living. I know that it's pretty hard to relax there and Andy seems to really like it here so why the heck not." Warren said.

"Oh, that's so sweet." Willow said.

"Yeah, I know. He wasn't up for the idea at first, but eventually after seeing how much I liked it here, he decided it was a good idea. All because I wanted to." Andrew said gazing lovingly at Warren.

"So what are you going to do with the practice? I mean it's such a great little place to just throw away." Buffy said.

"Great, but stressful. I mean I could be a doctor at a practice like mine, but running it is a whole different story. I'm not good with numbers and stuff like that and I always hire someone to do the books. It takes away from the reason I became a doctor." Andrew said.

"Well I hope you guys will be very happy living down here. It's a great little place." Oz said.

"He speaks in full sentences with nouns and verbs and even a few adjectives. I feel honored." Warren joked good-naturedly as he sat down on one of the chairs pulling Andrew onto his lap.

"I do that occasionally. It's very rare." Oz said.

"Well everyone just has great news. I get rid of Riley. Willow's pregnant and my stepbrother is moving to Sunnydale. Life couldn't be better." Buffy said.

"Well I'm sure there are a few things that could be better. Like say a certain blond attorney could be sitting here with us." Andrew probed.

"Andrew don't…" Buffy was interrupted by the sound of the doorbell.

"Food's here." Oz said.

"Thanks for stating the obvious. I'll get the food." Buffy said standing up to avoid further questioning. At least for the few minutes it would take her to pay the deliveryman and the stalling that would be involved before entering the living room.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"Oh… that's a story." Dru said after the waitress had taken their orders. She was stalling and Spike could tell, but he really wanted to get down to the reason for this dinner.

"Well we've got all night. The Dru I knew would never set near a family court case. Was it that money?" Spike asked.

"Oddly enough, no it wasn't the money. I… I got fired from my other job." Dru rushed out.

"Really? That's weird usually lawyers talk to each other when things like that happen." Spike said.

"Yeah well I managed to keep it quiet. I pretended I was moving to my dad's law firm because he wanted me to take over. The partners at my old law firm agreed to keep it that way." Dru said.

"Oh well if that's how you went about it. Why'd you get fired?" Spike asked.

"Well, you're just full of questions."

"Just answer them."

"Okay no need to get testy. I was on drugs."

"What?!"

"You can put your eyes back in your sockets. I was on them for awhile. Even before we were together. I just thought I was in control back then." Dru said looking down at her breadsticks.

"How? How could I have lived with you for three months and not have known. I mean… drugs. Was that why you were always so loony?" Spike asked realizing how insensitive that sounded.

He just couldn't wrap his mind around the idea that cool confident Dru had been on drugs and it had been before they were together.

"Those last months yeah. I was a little out of control. I tried to gain back my composure, but it was hard you know. The drugs made it easier for me to be wild and less conservative. At first it started like a once in a blue moon thing. Then it escalated into this huge thing I couldn't control." Dru said.

"So even before we were dating you were on drugs and you never told me? You knew that I was a recovering alcoholic and you just did drugs and didn't even care." Spike said accusingly.

"Okay yeah our relationship was mostly based on lies…"

"Mostly?! Try it was all based on lies. You would sit there and watch as I drank and you didn't care because hey if you were high then why not let Spike get pissed." Spike said a little too heatedly.

"Yes, I know I was terrible and I should have never tried to be your girlfriend knowing that you had problems of your own. I just didn't care you know. It was easier to know that there was someone just as screwed up as me out there and that's what you were. I never expected to be with you longer then a month or two." Dru said.

"Oh that makes me feel much better."

"Honesty is the best policy."

"So what is this? Some sort of twelve step program. Say your sorry to all the people you done wrong under the influence? I know all that steps, remember I took them."

"Yes I guess you can say it's something like that."

"God… I need a drink."

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"So, Buff, spill. Are you going to go after Spike or what?" Andrew said not really caring that he was being so blunt.

"No, okay, I'm not going to. It's not that time in my life. I… just look I'm not ready to date yet." Buffy said.

"But Spike really is a great catch and I can tell he likes you." Andrew said.

"God, Andy stop trying to run my life."

"I'm not trying to run your life. I'm just trying to show you the great guy standing in front of you."

"I know okay. I have eyes. I can see the great guy in front of me. I'm not stupid. It's… just… I sort of fucked things up." Buffy said letting out a defeated sigh.

"I'm going to guess this is a big mistake because Buffy just cursed." Oz said.

"It is. It's a very big mistake." Willow said. Buffy looked up at her with an accusing glare.

"You know?" She asked in a voice barely above a whisper.

"He told me. I'm not supposed to be telling you this but he told me. He really sounded defeated. He's not going to go after you anymore." Willow said.

"See I told you I messed things up. God, I'm such an idiot. See what happens when Buffy gets assertive." Buffy said.

"No I don't see. All I know is that somehow you messed up and yeah okay understandable and forgivable, but you haven't gotten assertive. You've just gotten defeated." Andrew said.

"Oh trust me I got assertive. I got so damn assertive that I slept with him." Buffy said. Everyone except Willow looked at her with shock.

"Yeah see, Buffy gets assertive and sleeps with a guy and fucks things up royally. How's that for karma." Buffy was raising her voice, but it was nowhere near yelling. She was too afraid of waking up Dawn.

"So you slept with him. Big deal. You two were practically dating as it was." Andrew said.

"The big deal is that as a defense mechanism Buffy told Spike that it was a mistake and that it didn't mean anything." Willow said. Andrew let out a shocked gasp, Warren looked slightly uncomfortable and Oz looked pensive.

"No, Buffy you didn't. How could you do that?" Andrew asked.

"Hey aren't you on my side?" Buffy asked.

"Buffy we are, but you've got to realize that you and Spike are like the same when it comes to relationships. Neither of you have had a really good lasting one. He's in a fragile state as are you and I think he really likes you and you just crushed him. He's perfect for you." Willow said.

"Yeah, maybe a little too perfect. What if say we get together and he you know realizes that he doesn't want someone with so much baggage. Or even worse what if he just wants me because he'd get an already made family and wouldn't have to work on it." Buffy said.

"God you sound like you just don't want to take risks. Life is about risks and I don't think Spike is the type of guy that would do either of those things. You just have to try. I mean you're at the beginning, how much damage can it do if you take that jump. You'll just end up at the beginning again." Andrew said.

"Yeah, but worse off. I can't put myself through that again. I can't do it. I can try, but I can't. I don't have anymore fight left in me." Buffy said.

"Then I hope you're prepared to let him go for good." Willow said.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Buffy said lifting her head from her hands.

Willow sighed. She really shouldn't be telling Buffy this because of the confidentiality codes it broke, but these were two people she really cared about. She couldn't just see them throw their lives away because they were both two stubborn to deal with the budding love they had for each other.

"Okay now know that I really shouldn't be telling you this, but you leave me no choice. Spike's taking that job in San Francisco." Willow said.

Buffy looked… broken. Like she just found out her puppy had died.

"Buffy you have to do something. You have to go to him and tell him not to leave." Andrew said.

"I can't. What does Sunnydale have to offer him? He'd be making a mistake if he were to not take the job. I can't offer him any guarantees. At least this job can offer him stability." Buffy said.

"But that's what life is all about. They're no guarantees in life. You just have to go with the flow of things." Andrew said.

"Yeah, Buffy don't let me have told you this information for nothing. Please, you know you want to do this. Don't let him get away just because you're afraid." Willow said.

Buffy looked around at her friends who were engrossed in eating their Chinese food. Buffy was half way done with her food. She gave one last look at her friends and then she got up and ran out of her front door.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Spike was dizzy. He hadn't drunk that much since he was … a teenager. Everything was blurry and Dru looked as though she was worried. He wasn't listening to her. She was going on and on about how wrong it was for Spike to down the drinks like he was. Spike just didn't care. He didn't give her enough to time to argue with his drinking.

At this point he was drinking straight out of the bottle and seeing red. He was seeing dark red and he couldn't believe he was giving up years of sobriety just because of her. It was because of her again and yet it wasn't exactly Dru this time.

What had he expected? He knew their relationship was built on lies. He knew exactly what had happened during his relationship with Dru. No this was the work of another her.

"You know s'not so much the fact that you lied 'bout your drug problem as is that fact that… that fact that you… you know… lied." Spike's slurred out and his brows furrowed in confusion.

"Spike, you're drinking entirely too much. You have to stop." Dru said.

"Why you were on drugs. Why can't I get a little drunk?" Spike asked closing his eyes slightly. The bright lights were hurting his eyes.

"A little drunk. You've had ten glasses of wine." Dru said.

"So what. Look I can do whatever I want. I'm a bloody adult aren't I?"

"Okay that's it we're getting you home."

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Buffy walked over to Spike's apartment complex. She had been thinking about everything that Willow and Andrew had said. It was true life was about taking risks and a small part of her wanted too badly. She wanted to be able to say she lived a little before she died.

She won't to be able to say that she hadn't said no to love. She wanted to be one of those lucky people that meets the love of his or her life and lives happily ever after. She wanted that so bad it hurt and Spike seemed like that person.

Another part of her knew that she was scared and was scared for that very reason. She didn't want to lose again. She had lost so many times before and she just didn't want to mess this up. Spike was a great guy and she'd be lucky if he was just her friend. She'd feel honored. He had done so much for her already.

Buffy rounded the corner of the hall that led to Spike's town house apartment and she saw them. Spike leaning heavily on Drusilla who was trying to open Spike's front door. From the looks of it they were trying their hardest to get inside the apartment and were even fumbling with the keys.

Buffy heard Dru let out a relieved sigh and watched as Dru and Spike disappeared inside Spike's apartment. The door shut with a small clicking noise, but the sound rang loudly in Buffy's ears. She felt devastated. Spike had obviously moved on passed their little thing and was back with Drusilla. Buffy wiped the lone tear that was threatening to fall down her face and stormed out of the apartment complex and into the dark night.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"Spot get off the bed." Dru said quietly to the dog that was taking up most of the space on Spike's bed.

The dog growled at her before it moved slightly. Dru sighed and gently placed Spike down on the bed. She took of his jacket and his shoes and was about to leave when she heard Spike's voice.

"Hey… thanks… for driving me home. Are you gonna be okay getting back?" he asked her.

"I took my car. Should I call Angel to go get your car?" Dru said.

She heard the small sniffle at the mention of Angel's name.

"Look I won't tell him. I'll send someone else to get the car if you want. He doesn't have to get it." Dru said.

"Wouldn't matter if I gave a rat's ass about him knowing or not. He couldn't get it even if he wanted to. He's in the hospital." Spike replied his voice heavy with emotion.

"What happened?"

"You don't have to pretend you care."

"I want to so humor me."

"Kidney failure or some rot like that. Result of him not taking his insulin on time."

"Oh, I'm sorry."

"Don't be. You don't really care. Look why don't you just go."

"Well if you're going to be snide about it." Dru said trying to make her way out of Spike's apartment.

"I'm sorry, Dru. There's just a lot going on. Angel, my family, I'm still angry at my dad, I'm moving and I have to tell them, other things." Spike finished.

"You're moving?"

"Yeah in about two weeks its bye, bye Sunnydale, hello San Francisco. Giles offered to make me a partner at one of his law firms." Spike said.

"Well that's great for you. Really it is. It's a nice opportunity." Dru said.

"Yeah I know. That's why I'm taking the job. I'm just dreading telling everyone. Xander and Angel already know. I had to tell Xander. He's the boss. Had to give my two weeks notice and I told Angel because he deserves to know. I'm going to tell them soon." Spike said.

"I'm sure they'll be happy for you. I'm happy for you." Dru said.

"Yeah thanks. You take care of yourself Dru." Spike said realizing that this was a moment. A moment in which he was letting Dru go for good and there would finally be closure with this part of his life. It looked like Dru needed it to.

"Goodbye, William. Hope you're life turns out to be everything you wanted it to be." Dru said with a small smile on her face. Spike smiled back.

"Yeah, bye Dru. Hope you do everything you set out to do." Spike said.

Dru stood there for a moment. This was what closure felt like and it was oddly empty and reassuring at the same time. Dru spared one last glance at Spike before leaving. Spike watched as she left. Spot seemed to be happier because of it and Spike couldn't be happier. He had closure. He was free to start his new life.

And for some reason his new life didn't seem that promising either.

A/N: Okay the turned out to be longer then I originally had planned. Sorry about the whole no Spuffy thing and the fact that Spike had the little bonding type thing with Dru, but it fit and yeah okay just go with it please. Okay so now PLEASE review. I just LOVE reviews.