Hi there! Thanks for the reviews and for hanging in for so long to read the next part. This is the first of probably three sections. As always, your comments are appreciated. Diane beta'd this one too - though, as always, I've tweaked it since she last saw it, so any typos or poorly done edits are totally my fault!

Fallen 1
by: Mariel

Samantha watched Jack walk through the office area. Something was wrong. Both his walk and his stoney expression screamed that whatever had been discussed in his meeting with Van Doren had thrown him off balance, surprised him in some personal way. Sifting through the papers on her desk, she found something to use as an excuse to go to his door and picked it up.

Standing in his doorway, she said breezily, "I've got the info on the credit card activity, if you're interested."

Jack looked up. Gesturing with his hand, he said, "Come in." When he added, "You'd better close the door," she paused. So she'd been right. Moving the door stop with her foot, she allowed the door to swing closed and then walked over to the chair set in front of his desk. Sitting down in it, she asked in a low voice, "What's wrong?"

His reply tumbled out with no preamble. "Van Doren made a comment about us. About our relationship. She knows."

Her heart stopped. "And you said?"

"There was no point in denying it - she wouldn't have said anything if she wasn't sure of her facts. She warned me off. Reminded me of the consequences of having an affair with someone in my direct line of supervision. Then, when I was ready to leave, she told me to be careful."

Samantha released some of the tension his first words had created. "Then she's not going to do anything about it."

He lifted a hand and rested his back against his chair. "Not yet, anyways. She knows it's not affecting our work. But if she's noticed, others likely have as well."

"So we have to be more careful."

Jack nodded.

Both felt the bitter cool breeze of reality slip into the warm cocoon they had wrapped around their relationship - but it never occurred to them to call it quits.

- - -

"I'm heading home now. Don't stay too late."

Samantha looked up at Jack, surprised by his words. They'd finished early, the girls had their music lessons tonight, and so she'd assumed they'd go to her place for a while.

Not this time.

"Oh," was all she came up with in response.

Jack looked uneasy. "It's been a while since I went straight home, and..." he paused, and she knew what was going through his mind. They had to cool it for a while, spend less time together. Be careful not to expose themselves.

She braved a smile. "I'll see you tomorrow, then."

She watched as he nodded and headed for the elevator. Fighting her disappointment, she turned back to her work.

Five minutes later, she started in surprise when a voice directly behind her asked, "Do you feel like a coffee?"

She relaxed as a warm flood of happiness coursed through her. Jack. She turned to look at him.

"Why don't you meet me at Timothy's?" he asked in a quiet voice. "There's no point in going home early - there's no one there. I have another couple of hours before the girls get back."

When Samantha nodded, Jack turned and left. Ten minutes later, she collected her things and followed.

She must have walked more quickly than he, for he was just sitting down at a table set against a back wall when she entered the coffee shop.

"Hey," she said as she drew up to the table.

"Hey," he replied. "I ordered your coffee on the way through. It'll be here in a minute."

"Thanks." She settled into her seat, not sure of what to say next.

"I'm sorry for being so abrupt tonight," he said, breaking the silence.

Her eyes showed him some of her hurt. "I was surprised, that's all."

"I know, and that's my fault. I should be discussing with you what we should do, instead of reacting to things alone." Ruefully, he continued, "We've done a lot of skulking around, but it wasn't until Van Doren had her little talk with me that I started to feel as though we were skulking around." He paused. "Now that she's found out, I'm a bit paranoid. We need to figure out how we're going to handle this. We've got to be more careful. "

She nodded, understanding.

It had been easy to become complacent. Easy to forget that this was an affair. Easy to forget that there were rules and regulations, as well as moral codes and marrage vows that they were breaking. It was, after all, a wonderful thing they were experiencing. Deep down, they had always felt that discretion should have been all that was expected of them. Now they knew differently.

Jack sat looking at her, knowing he didn't want to lose what he had found with her, but newly aware of how wrong what they were doing was. He wondered how long they would have continued on if Van Doren had not spoken to him, wondered if they would have continued happily for years, living lies so that they could share their own truth. Now, he saw that an end was possible, and he shied from the thought.

Samantha leaned back slightly as a waiter left a cup of coffee in front of each of them. When he had left and they were alone again, she looked at the brown liquid and said, "It's never felt like an affair, you know that? At least not the way I imagined an affair would feel." Lifting her gaze, her eyes met his. "It's been so easy-"

Jack reached out warm hands and lightly stroked the fingers that encircled her coffee mug. "Yeah," he said quietly.

Into the gentle silence between them, she continued, "It shouldn't be. Easy, I mean. Affairs are an unnatural thing, aren't they? A spouse breaking vows, someone willing to help them...but I've never felt uncomfortable with what we're doing."

And it was true. Their affair had quickly become an integral, routine part of both their daily lives. An integral part that they needed, enjoyed, and valued. It had felt normal, right...inevitable, and out of their hands. If an affair was the only way they could express their feelings for one another, then an affair was what had to be.

Jack looked at her, his eyes dark. They'd grown so accustomed to planning, plotting, and arranging their times together that it had fallen seamlessly into a regular part of their daily lives. It was like dating, only clandestine.

And God knew clandestine was something they had no trouble with.

"Perhaps this isn't difficult for us because we're so used to keeping secrets."

Samantha looked at him. Recognising the dark, knowing look, she felt startled at first, then relaxed. Of course he would know there were things he didn't know. Just as she knew there were things he did not discuss. She had little time to consider this before he continued, "We've talked about how happy we've been. That hasn't changed. I can't regret us. At least not in the way people would expect me to."

In truth, the selfish part of him could only regret that they had been caught. Having Van Doren confront him had made his reluctantly view what he was doing the way others would, and he hadn't liked what he'd seen. Still, he was selfish enough to want to continue.

So was Samantha.

- - -

Months, weeks... There were times she couldn't remember how long they had been lovers, only that nothing else seemed so important.

Waking early, she lay quietly, not wanting to move for fear of waking him and ruining the moment. Together. They were together. And had been for the past twenty-four hours. Totally. She felt warm, alive, privileged.

When his breathing altered slightly, she turned her head slowly. In the gloom of pre-dawn, she saw his eyes glitter.

"Hey," she said softly, thinking she didn't give a flying fuck about his wife, because Jack was hers and was here where he should be and to hell with what people thought.

"Hey," he replied.

She wanted to slide her body closer against his, wanted to soak up the warmth of his presence. This would end too soon, and would not happen again for who knew how long. Maria would be back with the girls, and he would go back to his routine with them. In turn, she would go back to her routine with Jack. She felt a sadness at that thought she didn't like to examine too closely.

Lifting an arm, Jack said in a low voice, "Come here."

Willingly, she moved closer, welcoming the comfort of his arms.

End

Fallen 1