THE ISSUE

Disclaimer: the people, institutions and more generally anything else you recognise likely do not belong to me.

Summery: Albus has issues, or at least an issue.

It was beginning to get to him. There was only so much that any man could take. It wasn't as if it was something he'd ever had an issue with before, after all he had an attractive younger wife and he'd always been rather…well virile. Faithful but virile. Unfortunately over the last few days he had not been… well he'd not been on his best form. To be honest he'd not been on any form at all. He stirred his tea listlessly, waiting for the sugar to dissolve. He'd managed to hide this slight problem from Minerva thus far but they shared a healthy relationship and if the problem persisted he suspected it wouldn't be long before she realised there was something up – or rather not up. The Headmaster looked up as the door to the staff-room opened and the distinctive shuffle-thunk of his old friend's walk could be heard approaching.

"Why thank you for coming Alistor." He said drawing himself out of his misery. "I wanted to put these into your hands myself." The former auror grunted in reply as he took the sheaf of papers and sat himself down.

"Well, now that you've got the charade over – what is it that you really want." The gruff Scot said leaning back and pulling out his infamous flask.

"I'm sure I have no idea what you mean." Albus said trying not to shift around in his seat.

"Ok – so does that mean I have to guess? I haven't got all day after all."

"Well… really there's nothing… I mean it's not…"

"Well it's obviously something to do with you and Min, or you and another girl cause otherwise you'd just have had it out with your esteemed Deputy." Albus tried not to show his discomfort at how quickly his friend cut through to the quick.

"It's more a case of seeking some advice from a male friend." He elaborated hesitantly.

"In that case – I suggest that you stop fretting and the likelihood is everything will turn out alright in the end." The other man said lightly.

"Is that your professional opinion?" He snapped back uncharacteristically.

"If you'd wanted a professional opinion, you'd have gone to Poppy." Alistor replied pointedly and Albus struggled to contain his blush. "But in all honesty Albus, there probably isn't anything to worry about. You've been busy and stressed, it's hardly surprising that…" He nodded fervently indicating that the other man need not continue. The sat in silence from a moment and Albus drank his tea.

"Have you…" He began after a few minutes. "Have you ever…" Alistor looked awkward but eventually shook his head 'no'. They slipped back into silence once more.

"Look Albus – if you're genuinely worried go see someone, it doesn't have to be Poppy, but in my humble opinion I suspect it'll sort it's self out."

"But what about Min?" He asked his genuine fear raising the question before he could sensor it.

"Oh – I shouldn't think she'll have a problem understanding. In any case, you could always take the opportunity to treat her." And with that his long time friend stood up, collected the maps and plans he'd come here on the pretences of collecting, and left.

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"Albus, really – don't make such a big deal out of it." She pleaded as she pulled on a fitted, ankle length housecoat and swept out of the bedroom into the lounge. "It happens to all men every once in a while." She continued, closing to where he stood glaring out of the window, dressed only in the trousers he'd pulled on upon exiting their newly abandoned bed. He was such a picture there, framed in the moonlight in the dusky lilac pants, zipped but not buttoned. Coming up behind him she tried to wrap her arms around his chest from behind but he pushed her away.

"Please Minerva." He said sounding like a three year old in a tantrum. "Don't patronise me. Don't feel you have to pander to an 'old coot'." He used her own endearment in such a biting, derogatory fashion that it cut her to the quick.

"It isn't the end of the world Albus." She tried again.

"Do you have any idea how BIG a deal it is?"

"It is not. And heaven knows MY opinion should be the one that matters."

"I do not need your sympathy Minerva!"

"And I wasn't offering you any!" This caught his attention and he turned to face her. "You are behaving like a child! Like a spoilt child who's been told he can't have what he wants." Albus said nothing but Minerva was on a role, already fuming. "Damn you and your infernal 'god' complex. I don't want you to be perfect, I don't want you to ALWAYS to be up to doing what everyone expects and I certainly don't NEED you to."

"But…" He tried to interrupt.

"Don't you 'but' me! All I want is for you to be my husband my, oh so very human, husband! I don't CARE if you can't always perform! So don't you tell me how 'big' a deal it is – it means nothing!" And with that she turned on her heel and fled, her infamous temper having over-ridden what she had intended to be a loving and reassuring talk. It was a few minutes later when she was standing looking out of their bedroom window that a creaking floorboard alerted her to someone's approach.

"You," Albus began in a husky, seductive tone as he, in a mirror of her earlier actions, slipped his arms underneath her own. "do wonders for a man's self-esteem." He continued pressing up behind her and making it quite obvious that the problem from earlier was no longer a problem. Her mood lightened considerably at his words and even more so at the touches of his wandering hands. "That, my dear, was quit simply put the most arousing speech I've ever heard."

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Albus had arrived back in their chamber that evening to find his wife sprawled on the sofa in front of the fire, reading some tomb or other. Her hair was coming loose and the glow leant to her pale skin by the fire, left him in awe of her ethereal beauty. When she had greeted him warmly, tenderly and most of all passionately, he had been convinced that he couldn't possibly have any problem in rising to the occasion, so to speak. Twenty minutes later however, it became more than obvious to both of them that that wasn't going to happen, he had lost his courage and bolted. The famously brave Albus Dumbledore had lost his courage. He had grabbed the nearest piece of clothing he could find and left his own bedroom as fast as he could possibly go. When she followed him, he had tried to make her understand that it wasn't the triviality she was making it out to be. That totally uncharacteristically he hadn't felt any response to her nearness in some days but he knew from experience that once Minerva was on a roll there was nothing he could do to interrupt it. What he hadn't been expecting was the reaction that her impassioned arguments and her heart rendering speech would have upon him though. In fact, by the time she had finished her rant and turned to leave there was a distinct tightness about his hastily donned trousers that brought a relief of the familiar crashing back down upon him. It seemed that everything had indeed righted it's self and any lack of willingness from his body in the past few days, was being made up for ten fold in his new found eagerness. The depression of earlier in the day was long gone and in the new light of elation Albus Dumbledore suspected that tonight was going to be a very interesting night. A night where he had every intention of lavishing his overwhelming gratitude solely upon his outstanding wife.

A/N: As with many of my fics, I really have no idea where the idea for this came from. Hope I haven't offended anyone…

In any case – do let me know either way

xLx