Title: "Out of the Darkness"

Author: Jackie W.

Email: jackiesfica...

Rating: PG-13

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She knew something was up and it didn't take a rocket scientist to figure out what it was.

'Good thing,' she thought, 'because I think my days as a rocket scientist are over'.

She tried to pay attention to Jack's words, and she knew that there was some good news about still being a consultant buried in there somewhere, but all that kept echoing through her mind were the words 'medical discharge'. She suddenly realized that he had stopped talking.

"I'm sorry, Sir. Where are my manners? Can I get you something to drink?" she asked already moving into the kitchen. "Is it too early for a beer?"

"Not for me it isn't," Jack replied following her every move with concerned eyes.

When he saw her falter as she reached for the fridge he was immediately at her side, and as she took great stuttering breaths trying to maintain her control he drew her into his arms.

"Let it out," he ordered.

And as if she had just been waiting for permission her entire body shuddered as she did just that. Eventually he moved them into the living room where he sat down on the couch and gathered her in even closer, pressing kisses to the top of her head and promising her it would be ok.

As he rocked her he could only hope that it really would be.

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Meanwhile, Daniel and Teal'c were trying to keep Pete away from the house after telling him what was going on. He was adamant that Sam would need him to comfort him.

"Pete, don't take this wrong, but I think in this case Jack is the best person to console her. He understands better than anyone just what losing her commission this way means to her," Daniel told him.

Pete looked doubtful, but agreed to give them some space. Still it was a scant hour later that they returned to Sam's house. They heard quiet murmuring from the living room and Pete made a beeline for the voices, only to stop short when he saw his fiancee curled up practically in Jack O'Neill's lap in a very intimate pose. Her head was on his shoulder, their hands were intertwined and she was talking in a low serious voice. If either of them had heard the three enter they gave no indication. Even more to his surprise, when Jack finally did indicate to her that they were back she made no move to get up.

"Hey," she sniffled in their general direction. "So I suppose you all know the news," she sighed.

Pete's mouth opened and closed, but for the life of him he couldn't make any coherent sound. Luckily Dr. Jackson came to his rescue.

"We are so sorry Sam," Daniel said moving to stand behind the couch and placing a hand on her shoulder in support. "You look like you could use some tea," he suggested and when she nodded with another sniffle, Pete snapped out of his stupor.

"I'll make some. Do the rest of you want anything?" he asked and then set about being the perfect host.

It was only when they all sat down that Sam moved out of Jack O'Neill's arms and Pete could see that the man's shirt was soaked and streaked from Sam's tears. Somehow that made him feel better.

They sat around and he listened while her friends chatted about her possible career moves now. He tried not to feel jealous of how Sam seemed to lean on the other three men instinctively, but he couldn't help but wonder if she would even notice if he wasn't there.

"You're still needed at the SGC Sam," Daniel was assuring her.

"Thanks, Daniel and I know I will still consult. I doubt I'll be there full time though. Realistically I can't do too much research without my sight," she said sadly.

"No, but we sure could use you to do consulting and training, and I know that Kerrigan would jump at the chance to have you teach at the Academy," Jack offered.

Sam perked up at the thought. She always enjoyed lecturing at the Academy.

"Well, there is no hurry for her to decide," Pete contributed. "She can use the downtime to plan our wedding."

There was total silence.

Daniel and Teal'c avoided looking at anyone by both staring at the ground in front of them. The two of them had already had a very interesting conversation about what they thought would happen now that Sam was no longer under Jack's command. And Jack's thoughts had been running along those lines as well.

Sam didn't know what to say. Her life had been turned upside down and getting married was the farthest thing from her mind at this point.
She just smiled, and let the subject drop. However, later when she and Pete were alone he brought up the topic again.

"We should think about setting a date soon so that you can put all of this free time to good use," he suggested.

Sam didn't want to hurt his feelings, but there was no way she was up to planning a wedding at this point. She couldn't admit to him though that the thought of trying to pick out a wedding dress that she would never see, not to mention flowers and all of the other details, left her feeling desperately depressed. Really all she wanted was a simple backyard wedding. She could easily limit her list of people to be invited to twelve. When she suggested this however, Pete quickly vetoed that idea. He had a large family and wanted everyone in attendance.

After a couple of tense discussions on the subject over the next several days Pete astutely backed off. There was no hurry and if Sam needed more time to come around to the idea of a big wedding he was willing to wait. Instead he launched into plans to go buy a bigger house for the two of them. This time Sam was adamant. She was not moving anytime in the near future.

"I don't even know where I'll be working, Pete. It's just not practical to be looking at houses at this point," she told trying to appeal with logic.

"Colorado Springs is not that big Sam. We should pick the house based on the neighborhood and schools," he countered.

Sam figured she owed him some honesty. "I can't handle moving Pete. The thought of having to relearn every step and where every item in the house is all over again is more than I can cope with right now," she admitted.

If Jack noticed Sam's stress levels building during their daily calls he didn't say anything. They talked about other things, Cassie's latest news from school, Sam's appointment with General Kerrigan over at the Academy, and the new Captain on SG12 who had developed quite a crush on Daniel. Then one day she called obviously upset, and despite his promise to himself to keep out of her personal life he found his mouth was ahead of his brain as usual.

"What the matter, Carter?" he asked, cringing even as the words left his mouth.

She paused. She too had made a vow to not bring up anything related to Pete to him. But she was feeling especially down and was too tired to worry about whether it was appropriate or not to tell him her problems.

"Pete and I had a huge fight. His department is having a barbecue, a family thing, and he wants to go. I really don't," she told him, knowing she wouldn't have to go into the reasons with him.

"Doesn't sound fun to me either," he sympathized. "Tell Pete to go without you this time, and you will work on meeting the people he works with in smaller groups. That way it won't be so overwhelming," he suggested, instinctively knowing that was what was bothering her.

"I did, and he understood in the end, but I hate having to keep explaining to him that I just can't cope, and I hate not being able to cope. I used to be able to cope with anything," she confessed.

"You're just off your game, Carter. You'll get back in the swing. You're already astounding all of the therapists so stop pushing yourself so hard," he ordered. "When is this party?"

"Sunday," she sighed.

"Well, I have Sunday off, so what say while Pete goes and does the party circuit you and I have a little outing of our own," he offered. "Just the two of us, I promise. No place crowded or noisy."

"What did you have in mind?" she asked, her interest peaked.

"It's a surprise, Carter," he chuckled.

"I hate surprises almost as much as you do, Sir," she reminded him.

"I promise you'll thank me later," he teased, and she gave up. There was no way he would tell her a thing when he was in that mood.

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Sunday dawned bright and clear, and Pete tried once more to convince her to come to the barbecue. She admitted to him that she was going to spend a quiet day with General O'Neill, not wanting to keep anything from him.

"What are you going to do?" he asked with a raised eyebrow, which he was glad she couldn't see. He didn't want to act like the jealous boyfriend but something about Jack O'Neill caused warning bells to go off every time he saw him around Sam.

"I'm not sure, he said he had a surprise for me," Sam admitted. "But he promised no crowds," she added and Pete could see her forehead crease as she tried to puzzle out what the General could possible have planned.

"Well, I won't stay late. I'm just going to make an appearance and then come back," Pete told her.

"Relax and have fun, Pete. You deserve a day out and I'm sure you are anxious to get to know everyone better," she told him, giving him a kiss goodbye that was too short for his liking.

Twenty minutes later Jack arrived, and five minutes after that she was in his truck still with no clue as to where they were headed. Her previous inquiries on what to wear had been answered with a mysterious "Doesn't matter," so all she could do now was sit back and trust the man. With a small smile she acknowledged that she still did trust him with her life, even though he was no longer her CO.

Huh.

No. Longer. Her. CO.

It wasn't like she was just realizing that now, so why was the thought so disquieting?

Before she could analyze it, a noise from outside the truck drew her attention. She'd recognize that sound anywhere. Plane engines. A moment later they stopped and she realized they were at a security checkpoint.

Peterson. They were at Peterson. She straightened in her seat and turned to Jack in excitement.

"Sir?" she whispered.

"Care to go for a spin, Carter?" he asked watching her face light up,
glad he had followed his instincts in setting this up. He needed a few hours flight time to keep his certification up, and he was sure that Sam would be up for it. The woman was an adrenaline junkie.

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They returned to Sam's house six hours later to find Pete pacing anxiously.

"Sam where the hell have you been. I've been so worried!" he exclaimed even as he noticed that that his fiancee was glowing.

"I'm sorry, Pete. We didn't mean to be so long, but we had the chance to take an F-16 out and it was so fantastic we spent more time than we meant to," Sam babbled excitedly.

It had been a stroke of luck really. The normal fleet at Peterson was comprised of C-21A support planes, but there were always a few trainers around for pilots to take out for certification runs. Jack had called over to Peterson the week before planning on reserving one of them only to learn that there were going to be three F-16D's at the base over the week-end. For the first time since his promotion Jack used his rank to pull strings, and by the end of the call the two of them had the use of one of the fighters for several hours.

Needless to say they had spent every minute in the air that they could and he'd let Sam take the controls for a stretch. He'd seen her pilot the F-302's and knew she was a good enough pilot to fly by feel. Besides once they were up high enough there wasn't too much danger. He'd been right. Even sightless she'd flown rings around most pilots he knew. And there had been such a freedom and joy to her maneuvers once she'd gotten past her initial nervousness.

Still, they would have been back hours ago if it hadn't been for the conversation they overheard once back at the hanger. One of the pilots of the C-21A's was describing to a mechanic an odd noise he was hearing in one of the plane's engines. Soon Sam was in the pilot's seat with the engine rumbling. The young Captain and the tech sergeant had both looked skeptical when she'd climbed down and diagnosed the problem, but an hour later they were shaking their heads and offering her a job. Seems they had been trying to find the problem for a week.

"Don't feel bad," Jack had advised them. "There isn't anything with a power source she can't figure out."

Sam had overheard and blushed. That might have been true at one point, but not now, she thought. Still, it had felt good to be digging into a problem and coming up with the solution again.

So it was a much happier Sam Carter that was saying goodbye to Jack now. As he made to leave she stopped him with a hand on his arm.

"Sir," she started.

"You know you really don't have to call me that anymore, Carter," he complained.

She nodded. "I just wanted to say thank you, Jack," she continued emphasizing his name.

"You're more than welcome, Sam," he replied. She didn't need to see him to know he was grinning.

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That was just the beginning of what turned out to be a very good week for Sam. On Monday she met with General Kerrigan, and he immediately offered her a post at the Academy, telling her she could lecture part time or full time, whichever she preferred. She accepted a part time position to begin with. On Tuesday, she was called into the SGC to deal with a dialing glitch. Slightly nervous about how much help she would be at first, and sure everyone was staring at her, it only took her a few minutes in the control room to feel like she was back in the groove. Siler and Davis were both there to answer her questions and get her the results of diagnostics and both treated her so normally she forgot her earlier concerns. She even stopped correcting them when they addressed her as 'Colonel'.

Then on Thursday she was called into the SGC again. This time to meet with a visitor that had come through the gate. As soon as she entered the boardroom she recognized the voice. Unable to read any facial expressions she was immediately concerned.

"Malek," she greeted. "I hope you are not bringing us bad news."

"No, Samantha," he responded. "I worked with several of the rebel Jaffa on my last mission and they told us you had been injured. I was zig-zagging my way through the various gates to bring my report to the Council and thought I would stop here to see if I could be of assistance. I regret to tell you I have no news of your father and Selmak. I have not seen or heard from them in many months. We are quite scattered at this point," he explained.

"I appreciate your offer of help, Malek. I'm not sure if there is anything you can do, but as you can tell I have lost my sight. The injury was due to a shot from an Asgard defense weapon. We have a healing device here. If you are willing, I would be most grateful if you could use it to see if you can correct any of the damage done," she told him.

"Of course, I would be honored to be of assistance," he told them.

They moved on down into the infirmary and Teal'c went to Sam's lab to retrieve the healing device. Sam couldn't believe how nervous she was and somewhere along the line she grabbed Jack's hand and now had it in a death grip. Jack had been surprised at first, but one look at Sam's face had told him all he needed to know. He sat by her side and murmured a few words of comfort. Luckily Sam couldn't see the look Daniel threw to Teal'c when he noticed their clasped hands, nor the Jaffa's raised eyebrow in return. Jack saw however and was going to chew them out when he realized it would just upset Sam. He vowed to talk to both of his friends later.

Malek worked on each of her eyes for about ten minutes. When he was done he sat back with a sigh telling Sam to keep her eyes closed for another five minutes.

"I think I have been able to fix most of the damage to the right eye,
except for some scarring on the clear front part, I believe you call the cornea. The left eye was more severely damaged, and I'm not sure if my efforts have made any significant improvement. In a few minutes Samantha may open her eyes, although I recommend we keep the lighting levels low and increase them slowly to give her eyes time to adjust,"
the Tok'ra explained.

It was an hour later before the doctor's would give an assessment, but the entire group present already knew from Sam's face that the news was good.

"She can see out of her right eye, although the scarring is causing some blind spots. The left eye is now recognizing light patterns, but beyond shadows it is still not functional," Dr. Brightman reported. "We are going to put her on the list for a corneal transplant in her right eye. With that we think we can restore full vision on that side."

It was a cheery, grateful group that saw Malek off through the gate. He promised Sam that he would pass along word of her current condition to the Council in hopes that when Jacob checked in they would be able to give him the updated news.

It was only after he had left and Dr. Brightman had cleared Sam to leave with strict instructions to wear sunglasses as she would be light sensitive for a bit that a thought struck Sam.

How exactly did she explain this sudden improvement to Pete?

tbc