Title: "Out of the Darkness"
Author: Jackie W.
Email: jackiesfica...
Rating: PG-13
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Sam was disappointed the next morning to find that the comfortable closeness of the evening before had vanished. Overnight Jack had put back up a wall between them and without her sight to look into his eyes she didn't have a prayer of figuring out why. So she did the only thing she could and pulled back into her own shell to protect herself.
Jack noticed that she was quieter than normal while the Asgard checked her progress after breakfast, but didn't think too much of it. Gwn reported that as suspected the delicate tissue was healing, but that it would be beneficial for Sam to spend more time in the medical pod.
"No sense in you hanging around," she suggested to Jack. "Go watch a movie or something and come back to get me in time for lunch."
Feeling dismissed, he did just that. Later he would kick himself for leaving her alone, sure that if he'd been keeping watch he would have noticed that something was wrong long before the Asgard did.
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They didn't put Sam completely under this time, just sedated her so that she floated in a soft haze. Several times she hovered on the border of consciousness, and it was during these times that her mind became confused. She couldn't quite remember where she was, so her logical brain tried to kick in. Each time she got a little bit further in solving the puzzle.
It was dark. And quiet. She wasn't in any pain, quite the opposite, she couldn't really feel any of her body. The situation seemed so familiar. If she could just stay awake long enough……
And then the fog lifted slightly. And she knew what this was. The absence of any senses, the floating feeling, the total isolation. She was back in the mainframe that the entity had built, stuck there in that awful limbo until either someone figured it out, or destroyed the machinery that was acting as her life support. Frantically she began searching for a way to communicate. There should be an interface she remembered, but she couldn't find it. Her mind screamed out for help not knowing that she was vocalizing the scream. The simple words became a mantra.
I'm Here, I'M HERE, IMHERE, IMHEREIMHEREIMHEREIMHEREIMEHEREIMHERE
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Gwn had become concerned when his charge's heart rate had begun to increase. The healing cycle was complete and they were slowly bringing her back to consciousness when several of the monitors began to flash warnings. Within moments Samantha was exhibiting unusual behavior, and General O'Neill was instantly sent for.
Jack walked into a room that was total chaos. Several Asgard scientists were running around checking controls. The lid of the pod that Sam was in was opened, and inside Sam was laying chanting something.
"Would someone like to tell me what the heck is going on?" he bellowed causing all movement and sound including Sam's rant to cease.
The silence lasted only a moment as Sam once again called out, more urgently this time. For just a second she thought she'd heard the Colonel's voice. Maybe he could hear her too.
"I'M HERE COLONEL!" she screamed, shocking and confusing the General further.
"I know Sam, it's ok," he told her walking over to where she still lay in the pod.
Sam's mind was starting to clear and at the sound of Jack's voice she realized that there were other noises now audible around her. Some machine was beeping and in the background she could hear the quiet murmur of voices speaking a foreign language. Asgard?
"Where am I?" she asked and reached out as she realized she could now move her arms. When her hand collided with Jack she latched on, grabbing a handful of his t-shirt in a death grip.
"You are on an Asgard ship. Not one of the cool ones named for one of us. You had an accident three months ago that caused you to lose your vision. The Tok'ra got part of it back and some of Thor's buddies are trying to fix the rest," he explained, now really concerned.
But Sam was nodding. "I was having a nightmare. I was back in that damn mainframe the entity had built," she told him, tightening her grip on his shirt.
Jack felt her tremble and looked over to Gwn. "Can we get her out of this thing?" he demanded.
The request sent the Asgard into a flurry of activity and barely more than a minute later he was helping Sam to sit up and get out of the medical pod. Once she was upright he could feel her start to relax, although she squeezed his hand when he made as if he was going to let go. Tactile human contact was obviously still needed.
Gwn and one of the other Asgard were hovering obviously concerned at Sam's reaction. They tried to reassure Jack. "This has never happened before, General O'Neill. We do not understand what caused it but we will check the pod over carefully," Gwn told him.
"It wasn't the pod's fault, Gwn. Sam just had a bad reaction to being deprived of all of her senses at once. Maybe you should think about adding a sound system so you can pipe in some music," Jack suggested. When the Asgard still looked confused he added, "I'll explain later.
For now I think Carter would like to get out of here and maybe get something to drink, what do you say Sam?" he offered.
"Yes, please," Sam nodded in relief.
He led her down to their little rec room and sat her down. Remembering how she had been after the Entity, needing light and noise and touching everything in sight, he put some soft music on the CD player while he went and made her some tea. By the time she had finished it he could tell she had calmed considerably.
"I'm sorry for the meltdown," she apologized.
"Don't be. I've been in those sensory depravation chambers before and even knowing where I was it took all of my willpower not to freak out. I can't imagine just waking up not knowing where you were, especially having been through it for real once before. I'm surprised you didn't tear the pod to pieces," he assured her.
She didn't admit that if he hadn't been there to bring her out of it she might have done just that.
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The rest of the day passed quietly. Jack made sure that Sam wasn't left alone for too long and that there was noise and activity around as much as possible. After lunch Thor stopped by to check on her. Having shared in the experience of having his consciousness trapped in a computer he was sympathetic and told her that if she needed to use the pod again there would indeed be a sound system and a communication device so people could talk to her while she was being treated.
Jack saw Sam visibly relax at that. He hadn't thought about the fact that she night need to go back in the pod the next day and that she'd be dreading it, so he thanked Thor for letting them know. Unfortunately, several hours later, the other thing he hadn't considered was about to bite him in the ass. It was getting very late, and even though he could tell Sam was tired she was insisting that they play another couple of hands of cards. It didn't take him long to realize she didn't want to go to her quarters and be alone.
After debating the issue silently for several minutes he finally made a decision. As dangerous as it would be to spend the night together he just couldn't abandon her to face the night alone. Now he just needed to figure out how to bring up the subject.
For her part Sam was trying to suck it up and face the thought of going to her quarters. She doubted Jack would want to sit up all night with her, and he certainly hadn't given her any indication over the past few days that he wanted to sleep with her (in any sense of the word). So she was knocked speechless when he looked up from his hand of cards and cleared his throat a bit nervously.
"Listen Sam, I'm getting tired, and there is no way I'm letting you go to your quarters alone tonight. So how about I take you back and you get changed for bed and let me know when you are decent and I'll come and sleep in with you. If you're not comfortable sharing a bed with me we'll have Thor's buddies move my bed into your room for the night," he suggested.
She was quiet for a moment and then nodded. "Alright," she agreed.
He breathed a sigh of relief. That hadn't been so bad. Then he realized something. "Aright I should have Thor move my bed?" he tried to clarify.
"No, I think we can manage in one bed. We've shared worse before," she commented.
So that was what they did. And as Jack slid into the bed that was barely big enough for the two of them he thought that he really should have had Thor move his bed in here for the night, because as true as it was that they had shared tighter more uncomfortable quarters before, he had always been her commanding officer at the time. Now with no regs between them he wondered if he could keep from embarrassing himself.
He took a deep breath to calm his nerves and was assaulted with the scent of Sam's shampoo.
Yeah, this night was going to be pure hell.
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By the time he woke up the next morning he had revised his opinion. After a restless beginning to the night where neither of them had been able to get comfortable, Jack had finally fallen into a deep dreamless sleep. Now upon waking from the best rest he'd had in months he found that the reason was wrapped securely in his arms, spooned with her back to him. Her breathing was even and shallow so he didn't dare to move from the intimate position for fear of waking her. Finally he surrendered and allowed himself to relax and enjoy the few minutes he would have to hold her before she too awoke.
In reality Sam had been awake for several minutes already and was faking being asleep so that she could stay just where she was for a few more minutes. She was desperately trying to memorize every detail of this moment, unsure if she would ever get an opportunity like this again. She knew the instant he woke up, but she remained quiet. When he finally was unable to stay still any longer, and he eased himself out of the bed from behind her she almost cried out at the loss.
Breakfast was a quiet affair and Sam had never wished for her eyesight more fervently since losing it. Without being able to see him she had no clue what he was thinking. Had waking up with her in his arms affected him at all? Her only consolation was that he couldn't see her eyes either. She was sure they would be a dead give-away for her love and desire for him, and if he no longer felt the same it would be extremely embarrassing.
Jack took her silence for nerves, and hoped that she didn't have to spend any more time shut in that damn pod today. When they reached the medical bay, Gwn began his tests and Jack pulled Thor aside, "Listen, if she needs to be shut in that thing today we will be able to communicate with her, right?" he demanded.
"It has already been taken care of O'Neill," Thor assured him.
"Thanks," Jack replied and then wandered over to see how the patient was doing.
He could tell by her smile that the news was good. Gwn reported the corneas were healing nicely and that in another day or two they would be able to remove the bandages and let her eyes start to adjust to light again. She wouldn't need any further time in the pod.
"Colonel Carter has amazing healing powers," he commented to Jack as they observed while one of the other Asgards marked down all of Sam's vitals and made notes on her progress.
"What do you mean?" Jack frowned.
"The protein marker left behind by the Tok'ra aids in the healing. It's not as good as having a symbiote but it is certainly an improvement over normal Tauri anatomy," Gwn explained.
"Does Carter know this?" Jack asked astounded by the news.
"She said that she and Dr. Fraiser had suspected as much but had never been able to prove it," Gwn told him. "It would never have been enough for her to recover from a life threatening injury on her own, but once she has medical help, her body should be able to assist as well." Gwn paused here, and then decided that he might as well tell the Tauri General the rest. "Colonel Carter also said that they were unable to determine the effect the marker and the naquada in her system would have on her abilities to conceive and bear children. I have assured her that there should be no problems."
He hadn't known it was ever an issue but then it would have fallen into the area of topics she discussed with Janet, not her team. As much as Sam was one of the guys there were certain things that the three men never mentioned. Like the extra chocolate that appeared in Sam's pack once a month or the times she disappeared from the campsite off-world for longer than normal. Or just exactly how all of the events of the last eight years had affected her body. He wondered how many times she had dealt with the aftermath of injuries alone in silence and was glad that at least now she had one less thing to worry about.
With all of the good news they both cast off the retrospective mood of the morning and decided to celebrate. Jack went through their supplies and planned a festive dinner. Sam went through the CD's (which Daniel had thoughtfully labeled in Braille for her when she originally went blind) and picked out some cheery music. Afterward they played cards making ridiculous bets. In the end Sam theoretically owned the cabin in Minnesota, Jack's entire collection of Simpson tapes and his next three paychecks.
"Don't worry, Jack. I'll let you win them back later," Sam grinned as they put the cards away.
"Let me win?" Jack demanded. "I was just having an off night Sam. By the end of the week I'll have won back all of that and a promise from you to come to Minnesota with me."
He almost kicked himself as he said the last part. Damn he hadn't meant to let on he still wanted to take her to the cabin, especially since he was pretty sure she knew he didn't have fishing on his mind when he asked her.
Sam could tell from the sudden silence that he was regretting bring up the cabin, but her heart did a little flip anyway. Maybe there was still hope.
"You mean you'll invite yourself to my cabin," she joked to break the tension.
"Don't get cocky, Sam" Jack warned, then paused as he finished up putting everything away for the night.
She knew instantly what he was worried about even without seeing him. "I think I'll be ok alone tonight, Jack. Thanks," she commented, while desperately wanting to lie and tell him that she was still feeling shaky and needed him to sleep with her again.
Although it wouldn't really be a lie. She did need it. Almost as much as she needed the air to breathe.
tbc
Author: Jackie W.
Email: jackiesfica...
Rating: PG-13
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Sam was disappointed the next morning to find that the comfortable closeness of the evening before had vanished. Overnight Jack had put back up a wall between them and without her sight to look into his eyes she didn't have a prayer of figuring out why. So she did the only thing she could and pulled back into her own shell to protect herself.
Jack noticed that she was quieter than normal while the Asgard checked her progress after breakfast, but didn't think too much of it. Gwn reported that as suspected the delicate tissue was healing, but that it would be beneficial for Sam to spend more time in the medical pod.
"No sense in you hanging around," she suggested to Jack. "Go watch a movie or something and come back to get me in time for lunch."
Feeling dismissed, he did just that. Later he would kick himself for leaving her alone, sure that if he'd been keeping watch he would have noticed that something was wrong long before the Asgard did.
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They didn't put Sam completely under this time, just sedated her so that she floated in a soft haze. Several times she hovered on the border of consciousness, and it was during these times that her mind became confused. She couldn't quite remember where she was, so her logical brain tried to kick in. Each time she got a little bit further in solving the puzzle.
It was dark. And quiet. She wasn't in any pain, quite the opposite, she couldn't really feel any of her body. The situation seemed so familiar. If she could just stay awake long enough……
And then the fog lifted slightly. And she knew what this was. The absence of any senses, the floating feeling, the total isolation. She was back in the mainframe that the entity had built, stuck there in that awful limbo until either someone figured it out, or destroyed the machinery that was acting as her life support. Frantically she began searching for a way to communicate. There should be an interface she remembered, but she couldn't find it. Her mind screamed out for help not knowing that she was vocalizing the scream. The simple words became a mantra.
I'm Here, I'M HERE, IMHERE, IMHEREIMHEREIMHEREIMHEREIMEHEREIMHERE
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Gwn had become concerned when his charge's heart rate had begun to increase. The healing cycle was complete and they were slowly bringing her back to consciousness when several of the monitors began to flash warnings. Within moments Samantha was exhibiting unusual behavior, and General O'Neill was instantly sent for.
Jack walked into a room that was total chaos. Several Asgard scientists were running around checking controls. The lid of the pod that Sam was in was opened, and inside Sam was laying chanting something.
"Would someone like to tell me what the heck is going on?" he bellowed causing all movement and sound including Sam's rant to cease.
The silence lasted only a moment as Sam once again called out, more urgently this time. For just a second she thought she'd heard the Colonel's voice. Maybe he could hear her too.
"I'M HERE COLONEL!" she screamed, shocking and confusing the General further.
"I know Sam, it's ok," he told her walking over to where she still lay in the pod.
Sam's mind was starting to clear and at the sound of Jack's voice she realized that there were other noises now audible around her. Some machine was beeping and in the background she could hear the quiet murmur of voices speaking a foreign language. Asgard?
"Where am I?" she asked and reached out as she realized she could now move her arms. When her hand collided with Jack she latched on, grabbing a handful of his t-shirt in a death grip.
"You are on an Asgard ship. Not one of the cool ones named for one of us. You had an accident three months ago that caused you to lose your vision. The Tok'ra got part of it back and some of Thor's buddies are trying to fix the rest," he explained, now really concerned.
But Sam was nodding. "I was having a nightmare. I was back in that damn mainframe the entity had built," she told him, tightening her grip on his shirt.
Jack felt her tremble and looked over to Gwn. "Can we get her out of this thing?" he demanded.
The request sent the Asgard into a flurry of activity and barely more than a minute later he was helping Sam to sit up and get out of the medical pod. Once she was upright he could feel her start to relax, although she squeezed his hand when he made as if he was going to let go. Tactile human contact was obviously still needed.
Gwn and one of the other Asgard were hovering obviously concerned at Sam's reaction. They tried to reassure Jack. "This has never happened before, General O'Neill. We do not understand what caused it but we will check the pod over carefully," Gwn told him.
"It wasn't the pod's fault, Gwn. Sam just had a bad reaction to being deprived of all of her senses at once. Maybe you should think about adding a sound system so you can pipe in some music," Jack suggested. When the Asgard still looked confused he added, "I'll explain later.
For now I think Carter would like to get out of here and maybe get something to drink, what do you say Sam?" he offered.
"Yes, please," Sam nodded in relief.
He led her down to their little rec room and sat her down. Remembering how she had been after the Entity, needing light and noise and touching everything in sight, he put some soft music on the CD player while he went and made her some tea. By the time she had finished it he could tell she had calmed considerably.
"I'm sorry for the meltdown," she apologized.
"Don't be. I've been in those sensory depravation chambers before and even knowing where I was it took all of my willpower not to freak out. I can't imagine just waking up not knowing where you were, especially having been through it for real once before. I'm surprised you didn't tear the pod to pieces," he assured her.
She didn't admit that if he hadn't been there to bring her out of it she might have done just that.
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The rest of the day passed quietly. Jack made sure that Sam wasn't left alone for too long and that there was noise and activity around as much as possible. After lunch Thor stopped by to check on her. Having shared in the experience of having his consciousness trapped in a computer he was sympathetic and told her that if she needed to use the pod again there would indeed be a sound system and a communication device so people could talk to her while she was being treated.
Jack saw Sam visibly relax at that. He hadn't thought about the fact that she night need to go back in the pod the next day and that she'd be dreading it, so he thanked Thor for letting them know. Unfortunately, several hours later, the other thing he hadn't considered was about to bite him in the ass. It was getting very late, and even though he could tell Sam was tired she was insisting that they play another couple of hands of cards. It didn't take him long to realize she didn't want to go to her quarters and be alone.
After debating the issue silently for several minutes he finally made a decision. As dangerous as it would be to spend the night together he just couldn't abandon her to face the night alone. Now he just needed to figure out how to bring up the subject.
For her part Sam was trying to suck it up and face the thought of going to her quarters. She doubted Jack would want to sit up all night with her, and he certainly hadn't given her any indication over the past few days that he wanted to sleep with her (in any sense of the word). So she was knocked speechless when he looked up from his hand of cards and cleared his throat a bit nervously.
"Listen Sam, I'm getting tired, and there is no way I'm letting you go to your quarters alone tonight. So how about I take you back and you get changed for bed and let me know when you are decent and I'll come and sleep in with you. If you're not comfortable sharing a bed with me we'll have Thor's buddies move my bed into your room for the night," he suggested.
She was quiet for a moment and then nodded. "Alright," she agreed.
He breathed a sigh of relief. That hadn't been so bad. Then he realized something. "Aright I should have Thor move my bed?" he tried to clarify.
"No, I think we can manage in one bed. We've shared worse before," she commented.
So that was what they did. And as Jack slid into the bed that was barely big enough for the two of them he thought that he really should have had Thor move his bed in here for the night, because as true as it was that they had shared tighter more uncomfortable quarters before, he had always been her commanding officer at the time. Now with no regs between them he wondered if he could keep from embarrassing himself.
He took a deep breath to calm his nerves and was assaulted with the scent of Sam's shampoo.
Yeah, this night was going to be pure hell.
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By the time he woke up the next morning he had revised his opinion. After a restless beginning to the night where neither of them had been able to get comfortable, Jack had finally fallen into a deep dreamless sleep. Now upon waking from the best rest he'd had in months he found that the reason was wrapped securely in his arms, spooned with her back to him. Her breathing was even and shallow so he didn't dare to move from the intimate position for fear of waking her. Finally he surrendered and allowed himself to relax and enjoy the few minutes he would have to hold her before she too awoke.
In reality Sam had been awake for several minutes already and was faking being asleep so that she could stay just where she was for a few more minutes. She was desperately trying to memorize every detail of this moment, unsure if she would ever get an opportunity like this again. She knew the instant he woke up, but she remained quiet. When he finally was unable to stay still any longer, and he eased himself out of the bed from behind her she almost cried out at the loss.
Breakfast was a quiet affair and Sam had never wished for her eyesight more fervently since losing it. Without being able to see him she had no clue what he was thinking. Had waking up with her in his arms affected him at all? Her only consolation was that he couldn't see her eyes either. She was sure they would be a dead give-away for her love and desire for him, and if he no longer felt the same it would be extremely embarrassing.
Jack took her silence for nerves, and hoped that she didn't have to spend any more time shut in that damn pod today. When they reached the medical bay, Gwn began his tests and Jack pulled Thor aside, "Listen, if she needs to be shut in that thing today we will be able to communicate with her, right?" he demanded.
"It has already been taken care of O'Neill," Thor assured him.
"Thanks," Jack replied and then wandered over to see how the patient was doing.
He could tell by her smile that the news was good. Gwn reported the corneas were healing nicely and that in another day or two they would be able to remove the bandages and let her eyes start to adjust to light again. She wouldn't need any further time in the pod.
"Colonel Carter has amazing healing powers," he commented to Jack as they observed while one of the other Asgards marked down all of Sam's vitals and made notes on her progress.
"What do you mean?" Jack frowned.
"The protein marker left behind by the Tok'ra aids in the healing. It's not as good as having a symbiote but it is certainly an improvement over normal Tauri anatomy," Gwn explained.
"Does Carter know this?" Jack asked astounded by the news.
"She said that she and Dr. Fraiser had suspected as much but had never been able to prove it," Gwn told him. "It would never have been enough for her to recover from a life threatening injury on her own, but once she has medical help, her body should be able to assist as well." Gwn paused here, and then decided that he might as well tell the Tauri General the rest. "Colonel Carter also said that they were unable to determine the effect the marker and the naquada in her system would have on her abilities to conceive and bear children. I have assured her that there should be no problems."
He hadn't known it was ever an issue but then it would have fallen into the area of topics she discussed with Janet, not her team. As much as Sam was one of the guys there were certain things that the three men never mentioned. Like the extra chocolate that appeared in Sam's pack once a month or the times she disappeared from the campsite off-world for longer than normal. Or just exactly how all of the events of the last eight years had affected her body. He wondered how many times she had dealt with the aftermath of injuries alone in silence and was glad that at least now she had one less thing to worry about.
With all of the good news they both cast off the retrospective mood of the morning and decided to celebrate. Jack went through their supplies and planned a festive dinner. Sam went through the CD's (which Daniel had thoughtfully labeled in Braille for her when she originally went blind) and picked out some cheery music. Afterward they played cards making ridiculous bets. In the end Sam theoretically owned the cabin in Minnesota, Jack's entire collection of Simpson tapes and his next three paychecks.
"Don't worry, Jack. I'll let you win them back later," Sam grinned as they put the cards away.
"Let me win?" Jack demanded. "I was just having an off night Sam. By the end of the week I'll have won back all of that and a promise from you to come to Minnesota with me."
He almost kicked himself as he said the last part. Damn he hadn't meant to let on he still wanted to take her to the cabin, especially since he was pretty sure she knew he didn't have fishing on his mind when he asked her.
Sam could tell from the sudden silence that he was regretting bring up the cabin, but her heart did a little flip anyway. Maybe there was still hope.
"You mean you'll invite yourself to my cabin," she joked to break the tension.
"Don't get cocky, Sam" Jack warned, then paused as he finished up putting everything away for the night.
She knew instantly what he was worried about even without seeing him. "I think I'll be ok alone tonight, Jack. Thanks," she commented, while desperately wanting to lie and tell him that she was still feeling shaky and needed him to sleep with her again.
Although it wouldn't really be a lie. She did need it. Almost as much as she needed the air to breathe.
tbc