Disclaimer: I don't own Red Dwarf or any of it's characters. (There we go. Short and sweet!)

Author's note: The two Rimmer scenes were easy to write. The Lister/Nicole scene...not so much. That's why it may seem a bit....bitty. Anyway. Please R&R!

He would have had to have killed himself for Rimmer to have taken the news worse. And it wasn't that he was in love with her - of course he wasn't - it was just that it was Lister. Lister was the last man alive. He was popular with Kryten, Holly and the Cat. He had a proper body. Rimmer had none of those things. In fact he more than had none of these things. He wasn't the last man alive; he wasn't alive at all. He wasn't popular with Kryten, Holly and the Cat; he was despised by them. He didn't have a proper body; he was a hologram. Now Lister had Nicole, and he didn't; that was the hardest pill to swallow. And to pour salt into the wound, he had voices all around him saying, "Did you hear? Lister and Nicole are an item. Isn't it wonderful?" "It most certainly is. I always thought I saw a spark between them!"
But he was strong. He convinced himself that seeing them together wouldn't be so bad. After all, it made them both happy, and despite Kryten's numerous remarks, he most certainly was not in love with her.
After a couple of days spent alone away from the rest of the crew, he re-emerged. He walked steadily down to his quarters, concentrating on every step. It would be fine. If he saw them he would just smile, nod and try to see the good side. He repeated this over in his head countless times before he was able to put it into practice as he turned a corner and saw them. Even now he could describe every detail; how she was wearing her hair; how his jacket was on his left shoulder, slipping off his right; how she was holding his hand; how he had his arm wrapped tightly around her body; how happy they seemed. Rimmer took a deep shuddering breath and blinked back the tears. He didn't smile, nod and try to see the good side. Instead he turned and ran.

"These are for you," Lister said to Nicole producing a bouquet of flowers.
"Oh, they're gorgeous, Dave! Thank you!" She tried to take them from him but her hand went straight through them, sending a weird electronic buzz up her arm.
"Erm," Lister began anxiously, "They're actually hologrammatic flowers. You can only hold them right at the bottom."
"Ah, I see."
"Anyway, are you ready?" he went on, pressing a button so the bothersome flowers disappeared.
"Yeah," she said taking his hand.
Once it got going, she couldn't deny the fourth date went quite well. Dave was really sweet and kind and considerate, although she sort of wished he could learn to chew with his mouth closed. And speak with his mouth empty.
"Nikki? You OK?" he asked her at dinner, spraying bits of mutton vindaloo over her.
"Yeah," she said distractedly, wiping the curry off her skirt with her napkin.
"Are you sure? You seem a bit..."
Nicole looked up at him, "A bit what?"
Lister shrugged and broke off a piece of poppadom, "Sidetracked."
Nicole rested her head on her left hand and tapped her knife on the table with her right, "I'm just...do you think...would it be OK..."
"Do these sentences actually have endings?"
Nicole smiled, "Yeah, I'm just feeling a little...perplexed."
"How come?" Lister asked delicately. Nicole hesitated. Could she really tell him?
"Is it me?" he asked with an excruciatingly anxious puppy-dog face.
"No," she said firmly and truthfully. Although none of this was his fault, she really hadn't been in the mood for a night out with Dave. She had seen Rimmer earlier and she couldn't help but notice the strange look he was giving her. She had only had that look twice before, once from her mother after a night drinking; once from her ex-boyfriend on their second date. That meant that either Rimmer hated her...or loved her. Her confusion was three-fold: she couldn't work out which it was; if it was hate, why did he hate her; and if it was love...well, it made her throat close up to think about it.
"You don't want to know. Really," she said dismissively, "Let's talk about something else."
"No, come on, tell me."
"Oh, Dave, please let it go!"
"Just tell me!"
"I don't--"
"What can be so bad? Tell me!"
Nicole remembered the last time she had heard so many "tell me's"-- it had been her saying them just before Lister had kissed her. This thought danced around her mind for a long time whilst Dave started his sixth curry. He had told her his feelings back then, why shouldn't she return the favour?
"Nikki, look, I've seen a number of things. Space monsters, emotion-sucking leeches, Kryten as a human. Think you can tell me something that'll shock me? Try me."
"I think Rimmer's in love with me."

Needless to say, Lister was shocked.

Rimmer woke with a start from his terrifying dream.
He had been walking along Red Dwarf's corridors when he found Lister and Nicole making love. He had turned and ran accompanied by heckles from Lister: "That's right, run! Turn and run away! Don't face up to what you know is true! Run away! Story of your life, mate!" The room went dark and more voices echoed, repeating Lister's words. He recognized them. It was his mother. And his father. And two of his brothers. Their faces materialized as if smeared on the walls. "No one likes you! No one likes you! You're a disgrace to the name 'Rimmer!' Turn off your hologram, make this universe a better place! No one likes you!" More voices joined in. Kryten. And the Cat. And Holly. Rimmer shut his eyes tight to block out the hideousness, but only found that the scary image was imprinted on his brain like a photograph. He opened them again and suddenly, John, his eldest brother, appeared from nowhere and placed a comforting hand on his shoulder. "It's OK, Arnold. It's OK. Everything will be fine." Fire soared up behind him and hovered in the air. John's gentle touch became more like a death grip. Rimmer found himself thrown to the ground and John joined the chanting: "No one likes you. No one likes you. No one likes you. No one likes you." There was a blinding stream of light and a familiar voice said, "I like you." Nicole stepped out of the light and everything disappeared. The fire, the voices, the faces, the intense fear. Everything bad went away. She stepped over to him and put her arms around his shoulders. She kissed his arms and his shoulders; his neck; his cheek; and finally his lips. When they broke apart she whispered, "I'm here," before vanishing.
Rimmer woke with a start from his terrifying dream.
He breathed heavily. Not that he hadn't had that dream several times before - it had just never ended like that. Oh no, he thought, wiping the computer simulated sweat from his brow, Oh smegging hell, no! He couldn't bring himself to believe it but he knew it was true. Kryten was right. He loved her.

A/n: Intrigued? I bet you are. Next chapter should come within the next couple of days. Bit snowed under with coursework at the mo (so much so I've been having a few "Chapter 9's") But the half term's coming up (YAY!) so I have a lot of free time on my hands. I may even finish the story....I may even start the next.....

Watch this space........