Disclaimer: I don't own 'Yu-Gi-Oh!' and all lyrics belong to Seether and Amy Lee.
K, this is a surprise. I wasn't planning on doing a fourth part to the fic, but when I saw this song, I realized that this was the only way to do it, so here it is: part four and the real conclusion.
I wanted you to know I love the way you laugh
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain away
I had the nightmare again last night. It still hasn't gone away, no matter what the doctor says. He told me to relax, and to stop thinking about the past. He has no idea how hard it is to forget. I know that I promised you I'd live your life for you, but I'm not sure I can anymore. No matter what I do, I just think about the fact that I'm living the life you had wanted. It's like I'm a thief.
I can almost see you shaking your head and reassuring me that I'm not a thief; that I'm doing something for you, but it changes nothing. Me and my stupidity stole your life away. It was my entire fault, no matter how many people tell me that it isn't. I just want to see you again.
I keep your photograph and I know it serves me well
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain
I wish that you had arrived a couple seconds too late, when I was already dead. But then again, that isn't fair to you either. You'd be me right now, living a life surrounded by pain. I guess it was just a lose-lose situation for both of us. Every day I am full of guilt; every time I pass the graveyard I haven't visited in over a year; every time I walk by our old apartment...always. Your presence haunts me.
I hope you'll forgive me when I see you again. I hope you'll pull me into your arms and understand why I had to do this. I only wish I could be lifted up and showered with your love again, rather than having to go through this. But I must; it is my gift to you. My sacrifice to see you again.
'Cause I'm broken when I'm lonesome
And I don't feel right when you're gone away
I started crying yesterday, while I was walking to the store to get some food. I don't know why, but emotion just suddenly overcame me. As I saw people watching me on the street, I knew that I had to get away from it all. Away from these people; away from this pain; away from this life I hate.
As I stand here, looking down on the black waters below me, I'm scared for the first time in my life. I always tried to have no fear, and here I am, scared to death. I wonder if you were scared when you knew that you were going to die. I like to think not, that you were calm as the blade fell. I pray you were.
The worst is over now and we can breathe again
I wanna hold you high, you steal my pain away
I miss you so much that I want to scream in torment, but I've managed to keep it inside so far. Everyone knows I'm grieving still, but they think I've been getting better. If they were as close as you and I were, they would know better than to think that.
I've never gotten close with anybody else before you or after you. I always remained completely and entirely devoted to you. I didn't leave a note, and I wonder now if anybody would even notice that I wasn't around anymore. If anyone would even come looking for me. I doubt it, I was never their friend. I was just a charity case.
There's so much left to learn, and no one left to fight
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain
I wonder what I'll say when I see you again. If I see you again. I'm worried that when I die I'll be sent somewhere away from you, as a punishment for all of my wrongdoings. I wish I hadn't been so terrible in my lifetime. I had plenty of opportunities to forget everything and start a new life, so why didn't I?
It's dark out now, so no one will see me fall. No one can save me, what's done is done. This is my declaration of love, just like in those old books you used to read. I thought they were stupid, and I never got through a full one, but I know their stories well. It's a lot like ours.
You've gone away
You don't feel me here anymore
With a deep breath, I let myself go and feel the wind blowing through my hair as I approach the raging waters below me. For a second, I doubt what I see, for the reflection in the water is not my own face which I have come to know so well, but yours. Then, I feel my soul leaving my body, and being taken up. To my angel.