14th June, Monday: I shall be attacked by Flobberworms.

"Flobberworms, Ron? I would love to see that!"

"Honestly Ron! That is utterly ludicrous. After all, the most Flobberworms can-"

"Thank you Hermione."

15th June, Tuesday: I shall get stung by a poisonous butterfly, which will lead me to stay in the hospital wing for the rest of the day.

"Harry, are there poisonous butterflies?"

"Yeah I think so... Monac or something-"

"Monarch, Harry. Or in scientific terms-"

"Thanks Hermione."

"But Ron! The Monarch butterflies don't-"

"Thank you Hermione."

16th June, Wednesday: The Giant Squid shall pull me into lake and keep me under for a good twenty minutes.

"You'll be dead by then Ron. The most should be around 3."

"At least make the lies believable! Like-"

"Thank you Hermione."

16th June, Wednesday: The Giant Squid shall pull me into the lake and keep me under for 3minutes.

17th June, Thursday: A book shall bite off all my fingers.

"Haven't you used that before?"

"Nope. The other was that the books will rip out my throat."

"Books don't do that! That's absolutely ghastly! They're the-"

"Thank you Hermione."

18th June, Friday: A large frog will sit on me, breaking all my bones.

"A large frog?"

"Yes! A large frog."

"That's nonsensical! Giant frogs indeed!"

"Thank you ever so much for your opinion Hermione."

19th June, Saturday: A bludger will knock me in the head.

"Not much damage will be done though."

"What do you mean?"

"Why Ronald, your incredibly thick head-"

"You're becoming very mean nowadays, Hermione."

"Just stating the facts Ron."

20th June, Sunday: Fire shall scorch me fiercely.

"What're you going to do? Put your head in the fireplace?"

"Shut up!"

"She has a point Ron. It is-"

"Shut up!"

21st June, Monday: Owls will peck me during breakfast.

"I'm sure they rather peck the food, Ron."

"Stop criticizing me!"

22h June, Tuesday: A werewolf will bite me in the middle of the night.

"That's not nice Ron! Have you forgotten Remus is a werewolf?"

"I'm sure he won't mind Harry. After all, this is my homework we're talking about."

"Your fake-work more like it."

"You're hanging around too much with Malfoy!"

"Am not, besides, don't you think that the werewolf would have better things to do than visit you at night?"

"Who in their sense of mind wouldn't want to visit me? Stop snickering you two!"

23rd June, Wednesday: A mysterious stalker shall strangle me.

"Stalker? I wasn't aware you had a stalker."

"I'm amazed someone would want to stalk you."

"Luna would I bet."

"That girl would stalk anyone!"

"Can you two stop making fun?!"

24th June, Thursday: I shall choke on my food which will leave me with a damaged throat for days.

"You've choked many times, Ron. Yet your throat has never been damaged."

"I have not choked many times! Just once or twice."

"Or four or five..."

"Malfoy's infecting you Hermione!"

25th June, Wednesday: A portrait will fall on me.

"Aren't the portraits secured to the walls?"

"Yes they are. I read in Hogwarts; A History, that a spell-"

"Thank you Hermione."

26th June, Saturday: I will fall from my broom during the Quidditch match and break my back.

"Isn't it Ravenclaw against Slytherin?"

"Yes, the winner gets into the finals. I hope Ravenclaw wins."

"They have no chance. Slytherin will win."

"Only because Slytherin cheats."

"They do not! They're just a bit... rough."

"...Right."

27th June, Sunday: I shall fall down the stairs and break my arms.

"There seems to be a lot falling in that particular week."

"What can I say, it's an unlucky week."

"For an unlucky klutz."

28th June, Monday: Lightning shall strike me.

"There hasn't been any rain for the past week Ron. And neither will it rain on Monday."

"And you know because...?"

"Because I read the weather report on the Daily Prophet."

"I never knew they had a weather report."

"It's right at the back Harry."

29th June, Tuesday: A fat orange cat will claw my eyes out.

"Ron Weasley! How dare you insult my cat like that! Crookshanks does not claw people's eyes out! How can you do something like this to a poor defenseless creature?"

"The poor defenseless creature as you put it tried to bite my leg that evening!"

"Only because you kicked it!"

"Because it's pestered me!"

"Actually Ron, it just brushed past you."

"Oh. Sorry Hermione."

"And...?"

"And...?"

"Crookshanks of course."

"That mangy, old, orange- Sorry Crookshanks."

29th June, Tuesday: A fat orange cat will claw my eyes out unintentionally.

"Ron!"

30th June, Wednesday: A white, old owl will pull my hair off.

"Ron! Hedwig does not pull people's hair off! And she is not old!"

"Harry, Harry, it's not true, you know it, I know it, Hermione knows it."

"I don't care, just change it."

"Fine."

"Really Ron, you should stop writing about people's pets."

30th June, Wednesday: A white, not-so-old owl will pull my hair off by accident.