Daisaigai turned to her audience. "Konnichi wa, everyone. Hope you like this chapter." She then resumed staring at large gray block sitting on computer desk.
"What are you doing?" Bakura asked, peering over her shoulder.
"Trying to vanquish this writer's block with my DEADLY DEATH GLARE of...DOOM."
The block rolled its eyes. "Oh please."
Bakura just shook his head.
Yami Marik also looked over the mad authoress's other shoulder. "Why doesn't she just kick it over that cliff next to her?" He motioned to the left.
Bakura shrugged.
697,832 hours later, Yami Marik: had grown very bored. "JUST BURN THE STUPID THING!!!!!!"
"It's CEMENT, you idiot," Bakura snapped.
"Must...not...blink..." Daisaigai muttered, still glaring at the block.
Yami Marik lost it. With a loud "ARGHH!!", he threw block off of the conveniently located cliff.
"SPLOOSH!!!" yelled the ocean below.
Daisaigai stared.
"There," Bakura said calmly. "Now can we do something? I'm very bored, and I think Psycho is too."
Yami Marik was trying to fish block out of the Ocean Below so he could burn it.
"Sure...just give this to Psycho so he can get rid of that writer's block once and for all," Daisaigai said, handing Bakura a fishing rod and a pack of water-proof matches.
"Fine..." Bakura walked over to Yami Marik.
Daisaigai wagged her tail. "Excellent. No more eeeeeeviiiiiiiilllll writer's block. Now I can start the chapter."
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Bakura and Yami Marik unsteadily got to their feet. Hamsters had swarmed the mall.
"Disgusting," Bakura snapped, kicking at a hamster that was trying to bite his leg. Yami Marik was similarly trying to avoid the vicious creatures. Both watched as the hamsters chased all the people in the mall. The mortals were too lazy to run away, and too stupid to realize that if the sustained too many bites, they would die from blood loss.
Daisaigai, Wind, Johnny and Kage Akumu were tearing at the mass of rodents. Their fangs made short work of the creatures, while Johnny's chainsaw also helped. For theirs and the safety of the mortals/characters around them, they made Johnny take out her retainer. They were fighting through the accumulation of hamsters to get to the characters that were needed to continue this fic.
Unfortunately for them, Yami Marik and Bakura spotted them. Mistaking their intentions, they frantically tried to get away, but the horde of hamsters hindered both theirs' and the mad authoresses progress. There were too many of the fuzzy creatures to move efficiently.
Kage Akumu suddenly got an idea. She leapt into the middle of the mass, and swung her neck from side to side. An earsplitting crack filled the air.
The hamsters froze for a split second. Then, a squeal rose up like a siren. The freaky rats-um, I mean, the hamsters- went absolutely mad and sped out of the open doors and out into civilization.
The mall was now devoid of hamsters. However, now the world was in grave danger.
-o-o-o-
Atem was trying desperately trying to reach the door. He knocked an elderly woman out of the way, ran over Billy and his mother, and tripped over a carpet that had been thrown in the middle of the floor during the chaos.
A siren's cry rose up. Atem watched as the hamsters went insane, and fled out the door. Bakura and Yami Marik were left standing in the middle of the mall, eyes wide and mouths agape. The mad authoresses had hid inside Hot Topic, for they would not melt on the dark carpet that resided there.
Atem began to run towards the madmen, taking out 2 pairs of handcuffs as he went. At last, he had an excuse to send them both to the psycho ward. He had almost reached the two yamis, when both Ryou and Marik jumped in front of him.
"Get out of my way," Atem snarled as he tried to push past them.
"Sorry, Pharaoh, but Isis just realized we can get discounts on tickets for Kennywood if we have 4 people in our 'family'", Marik said, stretching out his arms and blocking Atem's path.
Atem lunged at the tomb keeper, but Ryou knocked the king to the ground first. "That's quite enough of that," he said calmly, brushing himself off.
Marik stared. "You just kicked his butt politely," he said, unsure of what to think.
Ryou shrugged.
Bakura and Yami Marik glanced at each other. If they could sneak away now, their hikaris wouldn't notice, and Yami Marik, who had caused all this trouble, could order his followers to protect him from Marik's (and probably Isis's) wrath. They both began to inch away.
However, Yami Marik's cape was dragging on the ground. He stepped back too far, and tripped. A resounding thwack alerted Ryou, Marik, and Atem of the yamis' attempted escape. Bakura slapped his forehead as Yami Marik tried to get up, slipped again, and fell to the ground once more.
Atem got up, and started towards Bakura and Yami Marik again, but Ryou and Marik both stood in front of him.
"If Draculita realizes Bakura is in jail and isn't coming back, she'll go on a mad, bloody rampage until he returns," Ryou said sternly.
Atem opened his mouth to protest, but Marik cut him off. "Yami Marik would eventually chew his way out of his cell, and hunt you down," he warned.
Atem went to speak again, but was stopped by a sudden mental image of this happening.
"We'll pay you!" the hikaris said quickly. Atem gave in.
"Fine. But they'll both have to go to a psychiatrist for treatment."
Marik and Ryou both obliged, and handed the former pharaoh 20 dollars each. Atem took the money, and wrote down something twice on a piece of paper. He tore it in half, and handed it to them.
"Um...I can't read hieroglyphics..." Ryou said hesitantly. Marik smacked his forehead.
"Oh...sorry..." Atem said. He took the paper, and read it. "My handwriting isn't that messy..."
"He means he can't read that language, Pharaoh," Marik said irritably, snatching the paper out of Atem's hands and read it. "Is that a vulture or a deformed basket?" he snickered.
"Give me that!!!!" Atem yelled, grabbing the slip back. Ryou chuckled. Politely, of course.
Marik translated the Pharaoh's terrible handwriting for Ryou, and they both dragged their yamis out of the mall.
-o-o-o-
The Ishtars were crammed into their car, and driving back to their house at top speed. To prevent Isis from screaming herself hoarse at Yami Marik for causing all this trouble, Marik had given her the hamster he had picked up off the floor. Isis was delighted, and spent the rest of the car ride cuddling the hamster instead of depriving them all of their sense of hearing.
-o-o-o-
Yami Marik's band of followers were in despair. They had seen their leader defeat a great enemy (sort of), and "mysteriously" disappear. The ugliest Goth spoke up.
"WE SHALL FIND OUR LEADER, AND CONQUER THE SURROUNDING SUBURBAN AREA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
The other followers heartily agreed, and set off to find their chief.
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I know that was short, but what I'm planning is going to take up a lot of space chapterwise, so I want to split it up. This way new chapters come out faster.
One more thing: Credit for Marik's line, "You just kicked his butt politely" goes to Fast-Talking Johnny. Beautiful line.
This fic has 40 reviews!!!!!!! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHA!!! I'm so happy!!! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!!!!!! I write as I listen to both classic rock (Led Zepplin, ACDC, Rush, The Cars, Aerosmith) and the Naruto soundtrack Hyrouin Kage gave to me. That's why this fic is so weird.
Review please! I promise to update as soon as possible!!!
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