Journal of love
Summary: (beginning of season 8) Scully is finds Mulder journal.
Mulder has been gone for 2 months now. It's been hard with out him. I guess you don't realize how much you love someone until that person gone. The worst part is that if he doesn't come back he won't meet his unborn child and our child won't have a father. I know that he would make a great father. I WILL find him. I need to tell him that I love him. That his an father and this baby needs a father even more than he needs a mother.
I'm at Mulder to feed his fish. If I didn't that Agent Doggett would have a reason to come to Mulder's apartment. I go into Mulder's desk draw to get the fish food. I find the fish food and also find a book. Maybe a journal. I never thought that Mulder would have a journal. I open it. I hope he doesn't mind. If he does find out I will just say that my pregnancy was driving me crazy to do it. I go to the last entrée. The last time he wrote.
It's me. I'm in a hotel room in Oregon. It's funny to work on this case because this was the first case that Scully and I did seven years ago. How time flies. If only I knew that we would be together so long. She came to spy on me and now I trust her more than anyone. She's my best friend. I love her so much. I mean I really love her. I don't now how to tell her. The FBI doesn't allow partners to have a romantic relationship. For that reason, the FBI sucks. Even if I did tell her, would she love me to? When she was holding that baby today. I couldn't not help but think that she would make a good mother. But I took that away from her. Because of me she can't have children. Scully would be the only one I would have children with. I would be so lucky, for her to be the mother of my child. Our child. But because of me we won't have that chance. Because of the FBI, we won't have a chance. I'm about to say screw the FBI, and tell her but I'm not sure how to tell her. I don't want to lose her. I wouldn't be able to live without her. She's everything to me. One day I will tell her. I will tell her my feelings that I've been hiding for so long. I will tell her that she's the only woman for me. I will tell her that she's the only one I want to spend my life with. And that day I hope she says the same.
I will pray for that day to come,
Mulder
If he was here I would tell him that he didn't need to pray and that he didn't take that chance away. He gave me that chance. I'm carrying his baby. I love him too. If he were here, I would tell him.
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