Disclaimer: Hey, guyz!!!! As always, sigh I don't own Harry Potter. Wish I did! Hehehe!!!!! Well, hope you enjoy reading my fic. And please review. Tell me all your comments. Promise, it won't hurt!!! wink
How can you see into my eyes like open doors
Leading down into my core
Where I've become so numb
Without a soul my spirit sleeping somewhere cold
Until you find it there and lead it back home
Ginny was standing by the window of her apartment, watching the setting of the sun. She looked around her room. Everything was messy. Empty bottles of alcoholic drinks, drugs, boxes of cigarettes and clothes scattered everywhere. But she doesn't care, why would she care about herself? Smoke surrounded her as she got hold of a lighted cigarette. Her stomach gave a loud lurch but she didn't care. She doesn't need food; all she needs is liquor. That's what she all needs. Liquor. Drugs. Gamble. Smoke. Almost all of the vices in the world she had tried. She had made her life miserable—No! It was everyone who made her life miserable. She hates her life. Before, she loves it, afraid of losing it. But now, everything and everyone means nothing to her. Well, maybe except for a certain guy.
Wake me up inside
Wake me up inside
Call my name and save me from the dark
Bid my blood to run
Before I come undone
Save me from the nothing I've become
She went to her refrigerator and picked a beer. Closing her eyes, she remembered her past. Days when her life was fun. Young. Her friends. They were probably enjoying their own lives now. She imagined what her family was doing now. Though she never admits it, she wants to go back to the burrow, see her family, hug them. But maybe she would just receive a mere scold or even a slap. No one cares for her. No one loves her. She shook her head and looked at the bottle she was holding. Harry. Harry. He was the only one she knew she had loved. But like everyone, he doesn't love her nor care for her. He didn't even care when there are times she was lonely. Is this what they call life? Hell! This isn't life. She wondered why she's there in this hell they called world. She wondered what's her purpose. They say that life is full of challenges and we wont get what we want all the times. But she's tired of those unbearable challenges. They say you that everyone was born to learn. But to her, she was born just to suffer.
Now that I know what I'm without
You can't just leave me
Breathe into me and make me real
Bring me to life
She recalled the days when she's still studying, having fun with her friends. "We're always here for you," That's what she always hears from them when she was depressed, frustrated, sad and everything. Yeah, they were. Everytime she falls. Everything she feels like hope is gone. Everytime she had tears in her face. But now, where are they? Are they still there? Ready to help her? No. She's just a fool, believing in those words. Now, she realized that those friends weren't for life. When the sun sets, they always sit and watch it under the tree, beside the lake. But they had forgotten her now. No friend left for her to lean on. No shoulder for her to cry on. Now, she sits alone to watch the sun's setting.
Wake me up inside
Wake me up inside
Call my name and save me from the dark
Bid my blood to run
Before I came undone
Save me from the nothing I've become
Bring me to life
Harry. Harry. Harry… That name kept ringing in her head. Even though, she's on the verge of breaking down, he's still on her heart. She doesn't know why—or maybe she does. She knew that he's always there for her. All those years, he was always by her side. But now, she doesn't know what he's up to. Whether he's worried why she's haven't come home yet. Or he's just enjoying there, playing games, not caring for her at all... Suddenly, she heard a knock on the door. Ginny rolled her eyes. She picked up a cigarette
Before she went to open the door. "Wait up, can you?!" she screamed as the rapping on the door continues. When she opened the door, her body stiffened. Those familiar eyeglasses placed before those tantalizing green eyes. His same unruly jet-black hair. Harry.
Frozen inside without your touch
Without your love, darling
Only you are the life among the dead
"What do you want?" she said insolently, spreading smoke all over the surroundings, which made Harry cough.
"Ignorant! Haven't tried smoking? Come on, have one," she said, letting out some puffs of smoke, offering him a box of cigarette. Harry snatched the cigarette, dropped it, and ground it to the floor.
"What the hell do you think you're doing?" he said and went inside her apartment. Ginny rolled her eyes and drank the beer she left.
"Killing myself. Slowly," she replied simply.
"Where's your room?" he said, standing up.
"Why—?" she asked but was stopped for Harry had already found the way to her room. When she arrived there, she saw Harry packing up her clothes.
"Why are you packing my things up?" she said angrily, taking her clothes out of her bag.
"I'm taking you home,"
"Home? You call the burrow a home?" she said and left. Knowing what she's thinking, Harry followed.
All this time I couldn't believe I can't see
Kept in the dark but you were there in front of me
I've been sleeping a thousand years it seems
"Ginny, don't do it!" he said. They were both on the rooftop, Ginny standing on the ledge. The rain was pouring down to them.
"Don't you dare take one step forward or else I'll jump!" she screamed.
"You can't do this, Ginny,"
"Yes, I can. Why are you meddling with my hell-like life?"
"I'm not meddling with your life! I just want you know what you're doing isn't right,"
"What do you think is right?! I don't want to live anymore. I don't want to stand in this bed of earth. No one cares for me anyway; no one loves me. Why would I live?" she shouted.
Got to open my eyes to everythingWithout a thought without a voice without a soul
Don't let me die here
There must be something more
Bring me to life
"You think no one cares for you? You think no one loves you?" Harry said, trying to calm down. "Ginny, somebody cares for you. Everyone cares for you. Only you didn't notice it because all you think of is about yourself. You didn't know we were always by your side,"
"Always? Why? Where were you when I was experiencing pain?"
"You don't understand—"
"Yeah, I don't understand. That's what you, all, always tell me. 'You don't understand.' Harry, I'm not the silly little girl you used to know anymore. I've grown already and know what's good and bad, right and wrong,"
"Yeah, you know what's good and bad, right and wrong. You think in doing you own will, which you think is good? And is right? You're the one who told me a while ago that you've grown up, so now tell me which will you pick? Good or right? I know that by now you should know what's the difference between the two," Ginny didn't answer. Those words hit her. She knew that tears were streaming down to her face now, but she didn't care coz it will not be obvious.
"Will you please leave me alone? You don't have the right to stop me—!"
"I have the right to stop you because I care for you and I love you!" he said in an angry tone. "Sorry to take that tone with you, but only if you understand, we'll not go this far. You want to jump? Kill yourself? Okay. I'm not going to stop you," he said but he knew it was against his will and almost choked as tears started to fill his eyes.
"Ginny, only if you saw how your family, especially your mum, reacted when you left. You should have seen it. Do you think they're happy at what you've done? Do you think they were still cheerful as they used to be? No. Fred and George left to look for you, while Ron and I searched the whole house to find the parchment you gave to Ron, where your address is,"
There was a moment of silence. Ginny just looked at her feet as heavy rain started to pour out. 'How come all those years I didn't realize that? Why'd I become like this? Is Harry telling the truth? Oh, god, why've I done this? How come I've gone so blinded all these years' those questions kept lingering in her head and regrets started to fill her head. The answer lies within your heart, said the little voice in her head as tears continued to run down her face.
Next thing she knew was Harry holding out his hand to her.
"Ginny, will you?" Harry pleaded; the light in his eyes almost went out as seeing what Ginny had become. He had always known her as an innocent and sweet girl.
Ginny hesitated for a while, but then kept her pride down, took Harry's hand, and climbed down. By the moment she was on the ground, she found herself in Harry's arms, where she felt she's being loved and cared for.
"Oh, Ginny, I didn't mean to make you feel that way," he said, still hugging Ginny tightly. Ginny couldn't help but hug him back and cried hardly as ever on his shoulder.
"Harry, I'm sorry. I've become selfish. All I wanted is to have everybody's attention. I'm so sorry," she said.
"Ginny, don't blame yourself. I'm here now. I wouldn't leave you," he said and she just sobbed. Memories kept flashing in her mind. "We're always here for you," that's what everyone told her and Harry had proven it was true. They never left her. All she did was just let her thoughts overrule her.
"Ginny, promise me, you'll never do this again," Harry said as they let go of each other.
"Never again, Harry, I promise," Ginny said, still feeling that heavy lump in her throat.
"I love you, Ginny,"
"I love you too, Harry," replied Ginny, and she found herself in Harry's arms, where she always belongs.
A/N: Well, guys, I hope you enjoy reading it as I enjoy writing it. This idea just popped into my head when I once felt like the world is against me. No one lean on, no to cry on, and everything. I just found out I was the one who turned my back on the world… hehehe Now I'm normal again…..
Please review……..