Journey to Mordor (By SUV)
Disclaimer: I have no claim to The Lord of the Rings. It was created by J.R.R. Tolkien, not me. I own only the ideas and plots for my story, not the places, events, and characters from The Lord of the Rings.
Chapter Six: Moria
"How is it bad?" questioned Emily.
"Because Gandalf knows about the Balrog of Morgoth," said Tess before covering her mouth with her hand.
"How did you know that? No one knows that!" said Gandalf staring at Tess.
"Same reason I know so much about Middle-earth?" said Tess weakly.
"And that reason would be?" asked Aragorn.
"Might as well just tell them!" exclaimed Kate and everyone turned their attention towards her. Tess included who was staring in disbelief at her best friend.
"Tell us what?" asked Aragorn.
"That where we're from there is a book trilogy written about Middle-earth and Tess has it memorized and has told us bits and pieces about it. But she's a know-it-all about Middle-earth! Which is very annoying!"
"That's how you knew who was who? Why didn't you say anything concerning this before?!" questioned Aragorn staring right at her. "This could have been helpful you know!"
"Yeah it would have been, except that I can't remember how anything ends or what the outcome is of anything. Only the facts are all that I can remember. People, places, things are all that remain. That's all that I know!"
"What can you tell us about what is going on right now?"
"Well, the Balrog is in Moria—"
"First off, what the hell is a Balrog?" asked Emily.
"A Balrog is a demon of the ancient world. He is all fire basically. Only Gandalf could beat him out of all of us."
"Oh…" said everyone.
"And I think that there's something in the water. But that's it."
"Okay, can we drive through Moria, Gandalf?" asked the Hobbits.
"I don't see why not," came Gandalf's reply.
Tess nodded her approval. Then she looked at the door. She thought for a minute before walking over to it and speaking a single word in Elvish.
"Mellon."
The door opened and everyone stared at her. She shrugged and headed back into the Suburban. Everyone else followed suit and climbed in. After a few minutes, Tess began to cautiously drive into Moria. After sometime, Merry and Pippin broke the silence.
"Are we there yet?"
"NO!!!!!" replied the rest of the SUV without looking at them.
"Just asking…"
"NO!!!!!"
"Don't bit our heads off!"
"SHUT UP!!!!!"
"Well, rarrr…" said Pippin.
The SUV fell back into silence as Tess continued driving. After the revelation that she knew all about Middle-earth, no one mentioned that she had gotten them lost before and were more than eager to let her drive. No one minded an experienced driver at the wheel, but one who had knowledge of where they were in addition to where they were was the pick for driver.
About a day later, the Fellowship was just about out of Moria. They had reached the Bridge of Khazad-Dum. But the problem they faced was getting the SUV across. So Gandalf said some kind of spell and it flew over to the other side. Now for everyone to make it to the SUV. And that was when the Balrog showed up.
"Run across the bridge!" instructed Gandalf. "Run now! You can make it to the SUV! I'll deal with our foe!"
"Come on! Gandalf will be fine!" Tess said as she headed across the bridge.
Everyone looked between Gandalf and Tess and decided to follow Tess. After all, she was the only one with the knowledge about what was going to happen. And no sooner than the group had reached the SUV, then Gandalf vanquished the Balrog, before falling in. Frodo freaked out.
"Gandalf! Gandalf!" he cried.
"Good riddance to the pot smoker," said several members of the Fellowship.
"Frodo, if you don't calm down, you may be joining Gandalf," said Aragorn calmly and Tess agreed.
"It's a shame we lost the Balrog though," said Merry.
"Yeah, it would have been so cool to have the Balrog help us set marshmallows on fire!" said Pippin cheerfully.
That's when Merry and Pippin got their marshmallow bag out. And they proceed to throw them at people. Everyone joked around and pretended to be afraid of the marshmallows for a few wonderful minutes before climbing back into the SUV.
"It would have been cooler with flaming marshmallows!" said Pippin, pouting.
"It's okay Pippin, I'm sure you'll get a chance to set marshmallows on fire sometime," said Dolly.
"How about next time we stop?" questioned Emily, relieving her secret weapon, a flame-thrower.
"Ya!!!!!" cried Merry and Pippin, jumping up and down with joy.
"Oh no!!!!!" groaned the rest of the Fellowship as several began to bang their heads against the side of the car, dreading the next stop.
[Author's Notes:
Short but that's okay. Yes, I know I left things out but chill! This isn't supposed to be exactly like LotR! Anyways, the next chapter should be up on Thursday, August 5th. Please review!
Reviewers!
Ari Moon – I HATE the Penguin Blizzard River! I cursed really bad the whole time I was on that ride! And yes, you got to insult Legolas. I put that in just for you! Well, here's an update!
Krista123 – Well drugs do that to me. This chapter isn't really funny, it's just here. The next one should be pretty crazy! I mean, marshmallows, crazy people and a flame-thrower? Not the best combo for normal people! You sound like one of my best friends! She's very obsessed over Orlando Bloom! If anyone insults him, she acts like she'll kill them! And I tried hiding her binder of pics of him one time and she threatened to destroy my Aragorn and Arwen bookmark! She had it in her hands too! So I gave up the hiding place and got my bookmark back, in one piece!
musical geek – That's okay that you didn't review the last chapter. Yeah, the SUV's part of the fun of writing this story! I try to update every day, but if something happens to delay it, I have it noted on my author's page.
A Darker Side of Light – That's fine with me! Don't know if can add what you say, but it's definitely a good idea. Maybe you can have an appearance in a chapter that takes place in Gondor? As a protester? Just a thought…
TrekieGreenieShannaraElfOfME – The violence is one of the main appeals for me! The battles are like the best part! I'm so not a Legolas fan girl anyways, that's one of my best friends. I'm an Aragorn fan, but I'm not obsessed. But there is defiantly more to it than hot guys! I agree with you on that!
Jak – How I could I put you in without your necklace? Yes, the flame-thrower is mentioned now, I completely forgot about it! And it works well in the next chapter! Running over stuff, that may happen soon in the future.]