Journey to Mordor (By SUV)
Disclaimer: I do not own anything to do with Lord of the Rings besides owning a copy of the DVDs and books. So do not even think about suing me! I'll sue you first! I only claim rights to the idea of this story and my plot lines. And I own Tess. Emily, Dolly, and Kate are all being used with permission. And I borrowed the Suburban from my Aunt Debbie.
Chapter Twenty-seven: Lost… Again!
"Why do we always have to get lost?" asked Dolly. "Why is it always us that gets lost? Why can't someone else ever get lost?"
"Well, Aragorn got us lost that one time…" offered Tess.
"But that's not the same thing as being lost!"
"Moo!" said Emily, happily.
"And now Emily's a ghost and Gollum's loose in same area as we are currently trapped in! And we have no map or food or anything at all!" yelled Tess, furious as she realized their situation.
"Chill out Tess!" said Dolly.
"I can't chill out! I feel the need to strangle someone!"
"Moo!" said Emily, smiling as she floated around with her flamethrower.
Suddenly something came out of the bushes and Tess grabbed it around the neck and squeezed it. The thing's eyes began to bulge out and it made strangled sounds as it tried to escape from Tess. But Tess didn't let go. She kept taking all of her anger out on it. Dolly finally realized what Tess was strangling and tried to get Tess to let go, but Tess ignored her friend's cries. So Dolly had to come over to Tess and pry her fingers off one by one from the neck to get her to let go. The thing then staggered back, gasping for breath. Tess went to reach for sword but came up empty handed. She reached for dagger too but it was also in Rohan with everything else.
"Why did you stop me from killing it?" growled Tess at Dolly while Emily went, "Moo!"
"Because that 'thing' is Samwise Gamgee, Frodo the pink frilly aproned gay short stack's little friend! He might be able to help us figure out where we are! And we could use some help like that!" said Dolly, trying to get her point across.
"Like he really knows this area any better than we do?"
"Well I for one would to see you try to figure it, Ranger's daughter!" spat Dolly.
"I can track a bit, not as well as my father, but well enough for me. And I have some knowledge of Middle-earth, even though it's fading fast. But even that can't help me figure out where we are!"
"Could you get us to Mordor? Instead of back-tracking to Rohan?"
"Maybe. Though I don't see the point in doing so. Everyone and everything is back in Rohan. So why go to Mordor? It'd be a waste of time."
"But the war will end at the Black Gate, which is the entrance to Mordor. I mean, what are the chances that Aragorn doesn't bring the fight to Mordor? If we can get there by the time the others do, we could probably get home!"
"I see your point! Let's drive!" cried Tess as she jumped into the SUV's driver's seat and started the engine.
"Come on, Sam, Emily," said Dolly as she opened the back door for Emily's ghost and the Hobbit. They climbed in and she shut door before climbing into the passenger seat.
Tess hit the gas and they were off, racing to find Mordor. If only they could get out of the damn trees, then they would be able to see Mount Doom. Finally, after an hour, Tess had guided them out of the trees and she found the fires of Mount Doom. She then floored the gas and the SUV zoomed off towards Mordor. Their journey to Mordor was coming to an end.
Author's Notes:
Short and the story will be winding down in the thirties I think. The chapters will get shorter and more frequent. The next chapter will back at Rohan then we'll jump to Siege of Gondor and then finally the journey to Mordor. Then all the paths will converge and the story will come to an end soon. Probably by October.
Next update due: Thursday, September 16th
Reviewers!
Ari Moon – The moos have come! Me too. Have her e-mail me the description so I can see it! Yes you did, you character smusher!
Jak – You should like it! It was based on your idea!
Laer4572 – Well, that's what she wanted. But she'll still be a menace! That's a promise!
Hanna M – No your review made me re-think the direction and change it before I lost everything that I had before. And keep reading cause it's just going to get better from here on out!
Dark Borg Drone – This one is the RotK part!
A Darker Side of Light – That battle promises to be a good one! And Gollum shrieks in my mind! And I'm glad you liked it!
TrekieGreenieShannaraElfofME – Character violence is fun! When I start doing weird things then you know I've been watching way too much CSI! Thanks and good luck on your own story!
musical geek – Glad you liked the chapter! I do love the extended editions! They are my favorites! I like them longer cause then there's more story and more to enjoy! It's random. Emily says "Moo", Dolly says "Ba" and I say "Neigh". But Emily's obsessed with her "Moo". Emily's there to keep the tension to a minimum.