All I know is he better have a damn good explanation for this. I can't believe he just left like that. What did that nasty woman say to him? What can be so important that he has to leave his own wedding? It's been six hours since he left the chapel and a half-hour since he called me, telling me to come to Mercy Hospital. At first I was worried something might have happened to him, but when he said her name. I knew—I just knew she was the reason he left the chapel today. And she's the reason he left that poor girl in tears on the chapel steps. Even if he left because of Faith, he's still got a lot of explaining to do.
I'm gonna be honest, I've always liked Faith. And the fact that she takes care of my Maurice makes me like her even more. She's been a constant in his life for 13 years now, and for that I'll be forever grateful to her. I remember the afternoon Maurice called and told me he'd be stopping by with his partner so they could have lunch with me. I hadn't expected her to be a woman at all. Maurice had always referred to her as 'my partner' and I had always assumed his partner was a man. Especially since he'd never have anything but good things to say about 'his partner'. I know the man my son used to be, though nothing to be proud of, but he was Mr. Flavor of the Week Boscorelli. Women were nothing but escapades for him. But when he brought Faith over that one day, I knew she was different. He kept her in such high regard, it was unlike him, but I think his unwavering respect for her made me like her from the start. And I figured the only reason he hadn't pursued her romantically was because of that ring around her left index finger. My son may have been a playboy but he'd never get involved with a married woman.
But Faith hasn't been married for a while now and when Maurice first told me she was pregnant, my first thought was that I was finally going to be a grandma. It was such a happy thought, to think, me, a grandma?—grandma Rose. But it was too good to be true. I just remember watching him that night while he tried the best he could not to cry. My poor baby, he's the only thing I have left in this world—I held him close that night and cried with him. Seeing him in any kind of pain, is more than I can bear. I've never liked seeing tears in his eyes, I've always wanted to see nothing but a smile on his beautiful face, I've wanted what every mother wants for her son—happiness. I thought Grace gave that to him, but as I watched the two of them standing together at the altar, I couldn't help but notice the way his eyes kept wondering to the door. And when that woman interrupted the ceremony, everyone else's eyes were turned to her, but mine remained on my son. Anyone else would've only seen the anger in his eyes, but for a split second, I saw something else. I saw relief. And it was then that I realized his happiness was with someone else.
When I arrive at Mercy, Mary directs me up to the sixth floor where she says Maurice is waiting for me. I don't know why, but I'm nervous and at the same time anxious to see him. I'm still not sure why I'm here. But when the elevator doors open revealing the sixth floor to be the Maternity Ward, I finally realize Faith gave birth. It has to be the only explanation. I hurry around the corner to see a crowd of people sitting down in the waiting area. Many familiar faces from the wedding. Sasha is there; she smiles when she sees me.
"He's just around the corner, Mrs. Boscorelli." She tells me, pointing down the hall. I nod a 'thanks' and continue on my way. So the baby finally came, that's incredible news, I'm glad Maurice is here with Faith. I'm sure he wouldn't want to be anywhere else, I just hope Grace'll understand that.
"Maurice?" I call out, turning the corner to see my son standing a few feet away, his back to me. He turns at the sound of my voice and my eyes instantly land on the tiny person in a pink blanket he's holding in his arms. I feel tears instantly fill my eyes at the sight before me. I've never seen Maurice smile like this before. He approaches slowly, making sure not to wake the sleeping baby in his arms. But it's what he says next that starts the tears flowing.
"Ma—meet your granddaughter."
Ma's speechless as she stares at me, her eyes wide. "My—my—granddaughter?"
I nod, and I can't wipe this silly smile off my face. Ma steps closer, wiping a few stray tears from her cheeks. She's just as shocked as I was not too long ago. But now I can tell she's happy, so happy, and I can't begin to explain how good it is to see her smile. She leans forward and gently places a kiss on my daughter's head.
"She's so beautiful." Ma's eyes return to mine and she steps closer to place a kiss on my cheek, "oh—Maurice, baby, she's so precious."
"I know—I know. I can't believe it." I admit. I'm unable to take my eyes off this miracle right here in my arms. Holding her, it brings me a sense of peace I've never experienced before. I've never been this relaxed—hell, I've never been this happy in all my life. I can stay here and hold her forever.
"Have you found a name for her?"
"No—not yet, when Faith wakes—."
"How is Faith?" Ma asks. I look down at her, the sadness in my eyes betraying me. I don't reply, instead I lead her into Faith's room right behind me. I enter and place our little angel on the small crib next to Faith's bed. Then I take a seat next to Faith's bed and take hold of Faith's hand. Ma just stands at the foot of the bed, looking from me to Faith's sleeping form.
I breathe in deeply before I start, "things got pretty—um—complicated, during labor. After our daughter was born, Faith started to hemorrhage. Pretty badly, actually—and as I stood there—Ma, I thought I was gonna lose her." My voice cracks as Ma walks over and wraps her arms around me. I let it out, everything I've been holding in since my daughter was born. Tears of both joy and sadness soak Ma's jacket as I find myself clinging to her. "She's the reason I left today. She's the reason I couldn't marry Grace." I tell her, willing her silently to understand.
"I know, baby. I know." Ma says, tenderly holding my face. She doesn't judge, she doesn't scold me, she just holds me. I can't ask for anything else right now, but a shoulder to cry on. Get a grip, Boscorelli. Gotta pull it together. "It's gonna be okay, Maurice. It's gonna be alright."
I pull away from Ma and find myself staring down at Faith's still form. She's so pale, but the warmth is still there as I lace my fingers through hers, that's always a good thing. She's been stabilized for only a few hours now, but the doctors say she's gonna make a full recovery. I was so scared; it was a kind of fear I hadn't felt in a long time. Not since that hotel room two years ago have I ever felt more scared in my life. Right after the Nurse let me hold my daughter for the first time, Faith's heart monitor flat lined. The sound's still ringing in my ears. I remember going numb, watching as the doctors and nurses scrambled to bring her back to life. I couldn't even think as my eyes fell on her still body. In that moment I knew I loved her. Real love, a love even deeper than what I thought I felt for Grace. What I felt for Grace couldn't have been real because I was already in love with someone else and I didn't even know it. I can't even begin to imagine what I would've done if Faith hadn't pulled through today.
The more I think about Faith, the more I try to figure out when my feelings for her evolved. She'd always been different, always held a special place in my heart, a place no other woman before or after her could touch. I know one thing for sure though, I hadn't ever thought much about actually being in a romantic relationship with Faith, well, because she's been married for as long as I've known her. And then when she got divorced, did my feelings change then? I'm not sure, all I know is, that one night we had together was probably the most meaningful thing I've ever been a part of. I think it was then that I knew I was in love, but still I hid my feelings, burying it once again, deep down. If I couldn't even admit it to myself, how the hell was I gonna admit it to Faith? Then I met Grace, and she completely blew me away, she even made me forget for a little while that I was actually in love with someone else.
"Maruice?" I look up at the sound of my name, not believing what I'm seeing.
"Grace." I hear her name escape my lips as I stare up at her. She stands in the doorway, looking rather uncomfortable. At least she's not in her wedding dress, that would've made the situation even more uncomfortable. It would've reminded me more of how much of a jagoff I really am. She greets Ma and then asks to speak with me. Of course I agree because I feel bad enough for leaving her on our wedding day. I glance one last time at Faith before I lead Grace down the hall to an empty waiting area and we take a seat on the couch.
She looks down at her hands and this is my chance to just look at her. It's now that I notice the red and puffiness of her eyes. And my heart aches because I'm the reason she's in pain. The last thing I wanted to do was cause her pain, even if I don't love her like I thought I did, I know I care about her. She's been a huge part of my life for months now, and I was the stupid one who lead her on for so long. If only I had realized sooner how much Faith really means to me, I wouldn't have hurt Grace in the process. I feel so bad for what I've put Grace through.
"Look, Grace—I'm sor—."
"I know you are." She cuts me off, looking up to meet my eyes, "I just—I wanted you to know that I understand." Wow, that's so not what I expected to here. I thought she came down here to kick my ass or something, not make me feel worse for what I did to her. "I'm happy for you—and Faith."
"I didn't know the baby was mine, Grace, okay?—I didn't know—"
"Until it was too late, right?" She smiles sadly, and I see tears start to fill her eyes, "I just—I love you so much, but I know, I know I'm not the one you wanna be with. And now you have a beautiful baby girl—you've got a family now, Maurice. I came down here, I wanted to scream at you, I wanted you to hurt the way I am. I wanted to hate you, but I can't. And then I realized all I want—all I've ever wanted was for you to be happy. And walking in there, seeing the way you were looking at her—I know you're happy—and it's not because of me." I tear my eyes from hers because her sadness is breaking my heart. But I know the reason she came down here, I know she wants closure. It's the least I can give her.
I take hold of her hands, surprised a little that she doesn't pull away. We just gaze at one another for a time before she slowly brings her hands to my face, leans forward, and ever so lightly brushes her lips against mine. She knows how sorry I am by just looking into my eyes. She knows I never meant to hurt her, she knows. She pulls away slowly and smiles softly. And in that moment I know that's the closure she needed.
"Bye." She whispers and as quickly as she appeared, she leaves. I sigh heavily as I walk back toward Faith's room. That actually went better than I thought it would. Boy, do I feel like shit right now. Ah, man. This is harsh, Grace just made me feel even more guilty than I already was. I look up just as Ma's coming out of Faith's room; her eyes immediately lock with mine.
"She's awake, Maurice. She's asking for you."
Thank God for hospital drugs. I really don't feel any pain, except for this slight headache. I take a moment to try and process everything's that happened. The last thing I really remember is—my baby! My eyes search frantically around the room until they land on a small crib next to my bed. Oh, my God. Is that her? Is that my daughter? I want to reach out and hold her, but I feel so weak. At least Rose helped me into a near sitting position, but I still can't reach my baby. Where did Rose go? I thought she went to call Bosco. Oh, Bosco. He'll never forgive me for lying to him for so long. I can't even forgive myself, it was such a horrible thing to do to him.
"Faith?" That can't be him. His voice is so gentle, so caring. He should be angry with me. He should hate me right now. I turn my eyes to see Bosco making his way into the room, looking quite eager to see me. When his eyes finally find mine, a warmth and relief seems to fill him as he smiles at me. "Hey."
I smile back, still unsure if his is genuine. "Hey," I reply as he sits next to me on the bed, immediately taking hold of my hand and kissing me on the cheek. What's going on?
"How you feeling?" He asks.
"Like I just had a baby." I say, getting a small chuckle out of him. He walks over and delicately lifts my daughter out of the crib.
"Well, here she is." He tells me, and I feel a tear slip from my eye as I gently take her from him. My beautiful baby girl. Our beautiful baby girl. I lean forward to softly place a kiss on her head. Bosco reaches out to wipe the tear from my cheek, and when I meet his gentle gaze, he smiles again. I still don't understand this sudden affection I'm getting from him. "What do you want to name her?"
Geez, I really didn't even think about that. But then again, I remember wanting to name her after a woman I knew, not too well, but I knew her well enough to consider her a friend. I never did have time to mourn her because I was too busy trying to regain the use of my legs. I just remember feeling very sad at the news of her passing. I was too weak to attend her funeral, I couldn't even honor her death. And I think maybe, naming my daughter after her would help me honor her memory. She was one of the 55, one of our fallen heros. She deserves to be remembered. And this way, I'll always remember.
"How about—Alex."
"Alex?" He looks down lovingly at our daughter. After a few seconds, he looks back at me and smiles, "it's perfect—Alex it is." I know he understands my reasons, and I know he respects them. I couldn't ask for a better man to be the father of my baby. I realize that now. "And maybe Rose for her middle name?"
"Alex Rose Boscorelli." I add, watching him, waiting to see his reaction. I smile, when I notice the tears that suddenly come to his eyes as he looks back at me. He doesn't have to say it out loud, but I can tell he's grateful. How could he expect her not to have his last name?
"What's wrong, Faith?" Bosco asks, noticing the sudden change in my expression. I hadn't even noticed I stopped smiling. Maybe it's too late for him to ever forgive me, but I have to at least apologize for lying to him.
"Bosco, about me keeping this from you—I—um—."
Bosco shakes his head, silencing me with a finger pressed gently against my lips. He takes carefully takes Alex from my arms and returns her to her crib. He's at my side a second later, "It's finished. We don't have to talk about it—I don't care anymore."
"But, Bosco—I lied to you, I—."
"And I'm telling you—I forgive you, okay? It doesn't matter, it's the past. My future is with you—and with our daughter."
"What are you saying?"
"I'm saying, Faith—that—I love you. And I'm gonna love you for the rest of my life."
I know now without a doubt, that I love him too. More than I could ever imagine myself loving a man. He's my heart and soul. I know that without a doubt he's never gonna hurt me, he's never gonna leave me, he'd do anything for me because I feel the same way. I realized now why I kept that secret in the first place. I was afraid he wouldn't love me the way I've loved him for so long. I didn't even realize the intensity of my feelings until it was too late, he was already with Grace. But now he's not, now he wants to be with me. How'd I get so lucky?
My eyes never leave Bosco's as he leans forward, his fingers lightly touching my cheek. I close my eyes as his lips meet mine. And for the first time in my life I'm not afraid. No matter how bad, there is no complication we cannot overcome, as long as we're together.
The End