Chapter 9

Julian sat sipping his tea in the green house, staring out into the bright sunlight as he remembered what had happened only a few days ago.

Hearing a scream from the room down the hall, Julian quickly put on his dressing gown and ran to see what was the matter. Opening the door to Harry's room he found Jonathan standing over his Daddy screaming that he was dead. Running to the wizard's side he checked for a pulse and found it beating rapidly but strong. Harry was clutching at his heart as if he were in pain. Julian picked him up and carried him over to lie on the bed, checking his head to see if he hit it. Glad that he was not bleeding and no bumps could be found he turned to reassure the little distraught boy.

"Its ok Jonathan, Daddy just fell asleep. He is ok no need to worry see feel this. He reached out and placed the little boy's hand on his father's heart. "See its beating fine. Now can you go watch your sister for a while until Daddy wakes up?"

"Ok," Jonathan said through his tears. "Are you sure my Daddy is ok?"

"Yes he is just sleeping, now you run along and keep Arianna out of trouble for me for a while. I will sit with your Daddy until he wakes up ok?"

"Ok." Jonathan said as he kissed his Daddy's cheek before running to the other room to entertain his sister.

Julian could feel his own heart racing a mile a minute as he stared down at the unconscious man. He didn't know if he could call a muggle doctor and he had no idea as to how to get in touch with a wizard doctor. He tried to remember the name of the lady Harry told him about. Poppy something or other but his frantic worry for the young wizard would not let his mind work at all. Instead he sat there stroking the soft black hair of his beautiful friend, hoping for all it's worth that he would wake up all right and soon. His wish was granted not more than twenty minutes later.

"Harry?"

"Oh I feel like someone just ripped out my heart." The young wizard moaned out.

"Oh my god Harry, are you all right, how do I call a wizard doctor?"

"I'm fine Julian, I don't know what that was all about but I'm fine now. My chest is a bit sore but other than that I'm fine." He said as he tried to sit up.

Julian just pulled the young man up and into his arms making sure for himself that he was ok. Kissing his head repeatedly saying, "Harry you scared the crap out of me. I need you to tell me a way to get your kind of doctor's here. I don't know what I'd do if something happened to you. What about the children, Jonathan was the one to find you. He thought you were dead, so did I until I felt your pulse."

"I'm sorry Julian, I will make a list of contacts for you that way you will know who to call in case of an emergency. I better go see how Jonathan is doing."

Julian finally let go of the young man, stopping to look into the green depths to make sure that he was not hiding anything from him. Seeing that Harry looked normal again he let him go, reluctantly albeit. "Yes I asked Jonathan to keep Arianna amused while you slept. I told him you just fell asleep at the wrong time."

"Thank you." Harry smiled and squeezed the hand on his shoulder before getting up to find his son and daughter.

The memory of that day still made the muggle man's heartbeat fast. He could not lose Harry like this, and was happy to have the knowledge now as to how to get a mediwitch there fast; should anything like that happen again.

He was brought out of his thoughts by laughing. Harry was now heading into the garden room with both children dangling over his shoulders. They were both screeching with delight, as he deposited one child on the chair and continued to zoom the other about over his head. Harry was such a wonderful man and father, Julian could only wish that he would stay with him forever. He smiled at this and continued to watch as the wizard put the other child down only to pick up and do the same again to the boy.

Finally they were all tired out enough to sit and enjoy a light breakfast together.

Two owls swooped down into the garden one was Freeze the other was a plain brown owl. Harry gave them a slice of bacon each as he removed the letters. Opening the one from the brown owl his face fell then blanked to an unemotional mask. Folding it back up he then picked up Hermione's letter hoping that it would cheer him up.

Dear Harry

I'm glad you and the kids are doing ok, this Julian fellow sounds like a really nice person. I'm glad you have someone like him to take care of you. As you requested I went to visit Severus, I found him in the livingroom where he had been looking through a pensive. In the pensive was the night he attacked you. I'm afraid that Severus does not remember what really happened that night. His conscious mind has blocked it out some how, in his attempt to find out the truth he placed the memory in there to view it. When I found Severus he was unconscious and bleeding from a large gash to the side of his temple. Don't worry Harry he is fine now, I called Madame Pomfrey and she fixed him up, there were a few complications though. His heart was beating erratically and then it stopped all together. I used muggle means to get it working again and it happened again the day you say you passed out. I don't know what that means, maybe there is a connection still between you both from the bond. I will do a bit of research and see what I can find out about it. Now you don't have to worry about Severus, I plan to stay here for a few weeks to make sure the stubborn man is fine again. When he can be his normal sarcastic self then I will know he is fine.

Keep in touch Harry, send Freeze anytime but send him to your old house, I'm saying in the guestroom there.

Your loving friend, Hermione.

After reading the letter his worry and emotions stirred, he was torn between running back to see for himself and the fear of seeing the man again. He got up from the table, leaving the letters where they lay. He felt Julian's hand touch his forearm, he looked down and said. "I need a bit of time alone, could you watch the children for me?" Julian nodded; Harry gave him a small grateful smile before walking out of the house to sit in the sun by the lake.

Julian watched as the saddened man walked out side and without thinking he picked up the two letters and read them over. One was his divorce the other was a letter from Harry's friend telling him about what had happened to his now ex-husband. Laying the letters back where he found them, he turned to smile at the small children. Deciding that they needed some fresh air and fun he left a note for Harry telling him that he was taking the children to the park and for some ice-cream.

Harry came back in an hour later to find Julian and the children were no where to be found. He asked the servant who gave him the note telling him where they would be. Harry mentally thanked Julian and headed upstairs to his room, still lost in thoughts of what he was going to do now that he was no longer married to Severus Snape. The weight in his chest grew again as he thought of many times they were happy. Suddenly remembering the letter that Severus had sent with Hermione he went over to his dresser and retrieved it. Sitting on the bed he removed the seal and began to read.

My Only Love,

I am sorry, that is all I can think of to say right now. I've been told what happened and compared to what I remember the two do not mix. I don't know why I hurt you and I die each day thinking about it. You did the right thing in leaving me, I'm sorry again for making you have to make this choice, but it was for the best.

Besides my mother who died when I was eight years old you are the only other person I ever let into my heart. I cannot believe what I did to you, Merlin Harry I can't say I'm sorry enough. I know you won't except it but I offer it any ways.

The only plea I will make to you is that you do not let my children grow up without knowing me. I love them as much as I love you.

I have read the ministry orders and have accepted them, I will not bother you in the future, I only hope that we can work out some sort of arrangement for me to visit my children. I will accept any thing you wish.

I am so sorry Harry; I do love you and always will. You are the completion to my heart and it will suffer greatly now that you are gone.

Take care of yourself, live the life you were meant to live.

Forever Sorry, Severus.

Harry sat for a while thinking about what Severus had written, finding no answers he went to his desk to write his reply to Hermione.

Dear Hermione

I thank you for telling me what happened to Severus; are you sure he is ok?

I know you will take care of him for me, I wish I could go to him but I can't. Not yet at least. I received an owl along with your post; it was our divorce papers. It's over now and I am not sure how to feel about it all. I am to allow Severus to see the children in two weeks. The Auror and I will be there at all times; they set up a meeting for us at the Leaky Cauldron. Tom set up a room in the back for the children to play and visit with Severus. Please owl me anytime if something should happen to Severus, I know I am suppose to forget about him and go on with my life but I don't think I ever will. I will try though for the children's sake.

Take care of yourself Hermione, Love Harry.

That night Harry cried in his bed until he heard a knock on his door. Getting up wiping the tears away he answered it to find his friend Julian there.

"Are you all right, Harry?"

"Yes just a bit of news I wasn't expecting."

"I am sorry Harry but I read them. You left the letters on the table and I was curious to know why they upset you so much, will you forgive me?"

"Yes, it's all right Julian, I will be fine."

"Harry, let me stay with you tonight. Just to hold you and give you a bit of comfort I promise nothing more. You shouldn't be along tonight."

Harry stared at the gentle man for many minutes recalling what he had told Hermione about going on with his life. He could start now by letting Julian in to his heart, or he could try at least. Nodding he moved away from the front of the door to let Julian come in. Julian smiled and took hold of Harry's hand while he closed the door behind him.

As promised Julian did not try anything only lay down on the bed and pulled the upset wizard to his body for the much-needed comfort. Harry fell asleep after his sobbing subsided to the feel of Julian rubbing circles across his back.

Julian smiled as he heard the light snore come from the man sleeping next to him. Kissing his forehead he said, "I love you Harry, I hope this is a start to our relationship. I can give you so much love if only you will let me. Good night my emerald dream."

The two weeks that led up to the required visit with Severus made Harry a walking basket case. Julian stayed with his young wizard each night giving him support and comfort. Making sure Harry knew that he would be there for him no matter what. The most amount of intimacy they shared was when Julian would kiss Harry good night and pull him close to his warm body. He knew what troubled Harry and did not wish to add anything more to the mix. During the days he would hold Harry's hand, kiss his head or just hug him letting his friend know that he was there, always there and would forever be there if allowed.

Trying to get the young wizard to smile for him he thought up things to do. He took the 3 on a camping trip where he taught them the art of roasting hot dogs and marshmallows. Singing campfire songs and swimming. He could not believe that Harry had never experienced these type of things growing up as a muggle, and was sorely tempted to fire his Uncle on the spot just to make things right. He told this to Harry who just laughed it off and said, he was getting to experience it now and found it much more enjoyable with his family instead, along with Julian as their guide. This only swayed the muggle mans heart more toward his wizard love. The kindness that the young man could show to his own neglectful relatives showed the strength of heart and character of the green-eyed wizard. He was truly a remarkable man.

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