Summary: There is a room that contains so many horrors that it boggles the mind. There's only one person who could ever possibly love a room like this one: Lord Voldemort.
Rated PG for the ghastly room in itself and some content that may not be considered suitable for young children (and some that is, but it still remains horrifying nonetheless).
AN: Happy Belated Halloween! Here's a treat for you (or is it a trick? Ponder that). It's not my fault if you have nightmares. You've been warned.
A Most Horrifying Room
The room was a scary one. It was one of the most frightening rooms that many people would ever experience. The walls were covered with the most hideous things known to man. It was frightening how one sick, demented person could enjoy the terrible, terrifying room but one man did love this room with a frightening amount of passion. Amazingly, one man prized the strange and bone-chilling things showcased in this room.
That man's name was Tom Marvolo Riddle, respectively The Dark Lord Voldemort, also known as Lord Voldemort, also known as The Dark Lord, also known as just plain Voldemort, also known as He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named, also known as You-Know-Who, also known as Flight of Death in French, also known as Voldie on many fan fiction sites, and once he was even called Big Bad Voldie Daddy but that incident is one that he does not like to recount.
Voldemort is known to be one of the most crazed persons to ever walk the Earth's soil; rumor has it that his level of madness has even surpassed the insanity of the idea for The Spice Girls Movie. Some say that because of his extreme lunacy that is why only he could love such a terrifying room.
And now I bet you are wondering just how mad Big Bad Voldie Daddy is, aren't you? Perhaps you have been watching way too many Match Game reruns on Game Show Network or perhaps you have been sleeping through the whole Harry Potter series, I do not know, but I shall answer your question anyway.
Voldemort is crazier than the idea for a sequel to The Spice Girls' Movie.
But nothing in the land of insanity where gigantic bunnies play poker and rubber ducks take Hitler roles over lily pads could ever challenge a room like ... this.
The door of the horrifying room swung open and Voldemort clapped a delightful melody to turn the lights on. And there, in that room of petrifying horror, and the revulsion was revealed.
"I love you, you love me!" Lucius Malfoy began, beckoning his fellow evildoers to all join in.
"We're a great big family!" Bellatrix continued as she joined Lucius in his ghastly song ... of DEATH.
"With a great big hug!" –All the Death Eaters gave each other a great big hug ... a friendly, non-sexual hug, mind, this is the theme to Barney--- "And a kiss from me to you!" –The Death Eaters all gave a kiss to each other ... er ... still non-sexually, even though there are more males than females in that twisted cult ... ignore that – "Won't you say you love me too?!?"
"We love you, Voldeypoo!" everyone chorused as they all pumped their fists into the air.
"I love you too, everyone!" Voldemort said gleefully like a young schoolgirl. "But most importantly, I love myself!"
"Hurrah!" the Death Eaters cheered as they all continued to sing Barney's greatest hits all night long.
AN: And now I'll take the time to inform you that you have seven days to live. Thank you for your time. Have a happy belated Halloween and VOTE! Because you hold the power of the voting ballot! Shall we have a man who closely resembles some type of monkey or one who closely resembles Frankenstein? YOU DECIDE!