A/N: Hi Hi everyone! This is the chapter in which I reveal Pippin's TRUE
IDENTITY! There will be some more appearances by the duck and the phone!
So keep on reading!
Disclaimer: I don't own LOTR or Jerry Springer. Or Matell. Or that demented kids' song that goes "John Jacob Jingleheimer Smith, his name is my name toooooooooo..." But now, I do own the fuzzy pink telephone. I bought it with my own money! I'm special!
So, after Aragorn's "sleepover" with Smeagol, he continued his boring search for Pippin. He was walking down the hall, when suddenly, he heard a creepy voice coming from above his head.
"Elessar... Elessar..." It was the voice of Satin. No, the ring. "Elessar... I know where you live... I know where you sleep at night... and I know what you did last summer!" it hissed. Aragorn looked up, preparing to meet his awful fate, sweat dripping from his face.
It was the duck.
Aragorn let out a terrible, shrieking scream.
"I come in peace!" said the duck. Aragorn doubted this. "I only mean to deliver you this message!" He pulled out an answering machine from under his wing. Apparently, he had only meant to deliver a message. Aragorn pressed a button and listened to it.
The message was from a man named "Jon Jacob Jingleheimer Smith" but it was obvious that it was Pippin trying to disguise his voice.
"Hellooo, zis ees Pip-erm-Jon Jacob Jingleheimer Smith, and I am eenviting you to come on Jerry Springer! Zumwun needs to reveal to you a zeecret zat I – I mean zey -have been hiding from you vor years. Please be in Ohio by tomorrow at zeven-thirty am, and you vill be picked up and driven to ze studio. Zank you, goodbye."
"Oooooooooooooookay..." said Aragorn. What secret could Pippin have been keeping? He was terrible at keeping secrets. Nevertheless, Aragorn booked a flight to Ohio and packed his bags (A/N: how is he doing all of this from a mental asylum? Please don't ask; I have no clue.)
The next morning, after saying goodbye to all of his friends, Aragorn went to the airport and boarded his plane. He had never been on a plane before, so he had brought his teddy with him in case he got scared. And if he got bored, he could amuse himself by lighting it on fire. And once the plane had left the airport, he decided that it was not scary at all. So he took out his lighter.
"Sir," said a passing flight attendant, with a completely fake Barbie smile. "Lighters are strictly prohibited on this flight. I'll have to take that. You may claim it after the flight." Aragorn handed over the lighter and took out his matches. "Sir," said the attendant. "Matches are strictly prohibited on this flight. I'll have to take them. You may claim them after the flight." After the attendant had repeated this many, many times, and Aragorn had handed over all means of lighting a fire, he was very bored. He reached into his carry-on bag, even though he knew there was nothing in there. Did I say knew? I meant thought. He thought there was nothing in there. Well, as you guessed it, he was wrong. Very, very wrong.
Inside was the fuzzy pink telephone.
So, he spent the whole time making prank calls.
Ok, let's just pretend he's at the studio now
Once at the studio, he was tackled by lots of girls that wanted to put his stage makeup on him. Once this was over, Jerry Himself came to talk to Aragorn.
"Hello, Aragorn. I am your conscience. Obey me at all times. Okay?" Aragorn, looking hypnotized, nodded.
"Good. Now, you will look and act surprised when the secret is revealed. Got it?" Nod.
"You can even act upset if you feel that you should," Suddenly, Aragorn came out of his trance.
"What if I don't?" he wondered aloud.
"Then you will eat this rotten egg!!! I named it Shnookums!!!" Aragorn snapped back into it.
So, the show started. Pippin came out and talked to Jerry for a while. Then a stage manager pushed Aragorn onto the stage.
"Aragorn, this is your friend Pippin. He has a secret to tell you. Don't you, Pippin?" Pippin nodded, obviously hypnotized as well.
"Hi! I have a secret to tell you. I've been lying to you for.....ummmmmm..... a lots of years!" Aragorn nodded.
"I'm not a Pippin." pippin breaks down into tears "I'm not even a mushroom or a kangaroo!" Aragorn nodded. "I'm a......." (a/n sorry to disappoint you deagolsmeagol) ".......PIPPIN!" Hahahahaha!" Pippin ran off stage laughing. Aragorn grunted.
Disclaimer: I don't own LOTR or Jerry Springer. Or Matell. Or that demented kids' song that goes "John Jacob Jingleheimer Smith, his name is my name toooooooooo..." But now, I do own the fuzzy pink telephone. I bought it with my own money! I'm special!
So, after Aragorn's "sleepover" with Smeagol, he continued his boring search for Pippin. He was walking down the hall, when suddenly, he heard a creepy voice coming from above his head.
"Elessar... Elessar..." It was the voice of Satin. No, the ring. "Elessar... I know where you live... I know where you sleep at night... and I know what you did last summer!" it hissed. Aragorn looked up, preparing to meet his awful fate, sweat dripping from his face.
It was the duck.
Aragorn let out a terrible, shrieking scream.
"I come in peace!" said the duck. Aragorn doubted this. "I only mean to deliver you this message!" He pulled out an answering machine from under his wing. Apparently, he had only meant to deliver a message. Aragorn pressed a button and listened to it.
The message was from a man named "Jon Jacob Jingleheimer Smith" but it was obvious that it was Pippin trying to disguise his voice.
"Hellooo, zis ees Pip-erm-Jon Jacob Jingleheimer Smith, and I am eenviting you to come on Jerry Springer! Zumwun needs to reveal to you a zeecret zat I – I mean zey -have been hiding from you vor years. Please be in Ohio by tomorrow at zeven-thirty am, and you vill be picked up and driven to ze studio. Zank you, goodbye."
"Oooooooooooooookay..." said Aragorn. What secret could Pippin have been keeping? He was terrible at keeping secrets. Nevertheless, Aragorn booked a flight to Ohio and packed his bags (A/N: how is he doing all of this from a mental asylum? Please don't ask; I have no clue.)
The next morning, after saying goodbye to all of his friends, Aragorn went to the airport and boarded his plane. He had never been on a plane before, so he had brought his teddy with him in case he got scared. And if he got bored, he could amuse himself by lighting it on fire. And once the plane had left the airport, he decided that it was not scary at all. So he took out his lighter.
"Sir," said a passing flight attendant, with a completely fake Barbie smile. "Lighters are strictly prohibited on this flight. I'll have to take that. You may claim it after the flight." Aragorn handed over the lighter and took out his matches. "Sir," said the attendant. "Matches are strictly prohibited on this flight. I'll have to take them. You may claim them after the flight." After the attendant had repeated this many, many times, and Aragorn had handed over all means of lighting a fire, he was very bored. He reached into his carry-on bag, even though he knew there was nothing in there. Did I say knew? I meant thought. He thought there was nothing in there. Well, as you guessed it, he was wrong. Very, very wrong.
Inside was the fuzzy pink telephone.
So, he spent the whole time making prank calls.
Ok, let's just pretend he's at the studio now
Once at the studio, he was tackled by lots of girls that wanted to put his stage makeup on him. Once this was over, Jerry Himself came to talk to Aragorn.
"Hello, Aragorn. I am your conscience. Obey me at all times. Okay?" Aragorn, looking hypnotized, nodded.
"Good. Now, you will look and act surprised when the secret is revealed. Got it?" Nod.
"You can even act upset if you feel that you should," Suddenly, Aragorn came out of his trance.
"What if I don't?" he wondered aloud.
"Then you will eat this rotten egg!!! I named it Shnookums!!!" Aragorn snapped back into it.
So, the show started. Pippin came out and talked to Jerry for a while. Then a stage manager pushed Aragorn onto the stage.
"Aragorn, this is your friend Pippin. He has a secret to tell you. Don't you, Pippin?" Pippin nodded, obviously hypnotized as well.
"Hi! I have a secret to tell you. I've been lying to you for.....ummmmmm..... a lots of years!" Aragorn nodded.
"I'm not a Pippin." pippin breaks down into tears "I'm not even a mushroom or a kangaroo!" Aragorn nodded. "I'm a......." (a/n sorry to disappoint you deagolsmeagol) ".......PIPPIN!" Hahahahaha!" Pippin ran off stage laughing. Aragorn grunted.