Seth got outside on Saturday morning to find his father stationed proudly in front of Kirsten's car, waiting for the remainder of the family to join him.
"Oh, dear god," Seth stopped dead.
"Top of the morning, Seth! You all set to go?"
"Dad, take off the visor. I'm serious." Sandy grinned mischievously and straightened it on his head. "Dad. Not kidding. That visor is...a threat to humanity. That is the most horrible visor I have ever seen. And you might think that visors would be hard to gage, considering the fact that they're all so god awful, but this is by far the worst."
"Ready to hit the road?" Sandy smugly ignored him.
"It's literally glowing."
"I'm sorry, who's the parent here?"
"Dad..."
"Who is it? Answer me that."
"Dad, I—,"
"Who's the parent, Seth?" Seth sighed dejectedly.
"You."
"Why, yes! And as the parent...I'm choosing to wear this blinding orange visor. Got it?"
"Whatever, Dad."
"That's the spirit!"
"I'm seriously going blind, though. It's hurting my eyes." Kirsten exited the house and went straight over to Sandy.
"Hey, Sandy?" She wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him.
"Mm...yeah, hon?" She started to kiss his neck, and just as Seth was about to protest, she grabbed the visor and threw it to him like a Frisbee.
"There is no way that I'm letting you wear a day-glo visor on the Cohen family road trip," she replied cockily. "Seth, if you wouldn't mind disposing of that horrible, horrible visor...then we can be on our way!"
"Oh, man, Mom," Seth shook his head as he headed back inside. "Burn. That was a burn. That was the best burn I've seen in weeks. Dad, it has to be said. You got served."
"I did not!" Sandy called back. "I still have some Ray-Bans hidden in the glove compartment!" Kirsten, her arms still around him, diverted his attention back to her.
"Honey," she said pleasantly, kissing him again. "If the Ray-Bans come out...you are never getting 'served' again."
"You guys don't let me have any fun!"
"If wearing ugly sunglasses is more fun for you than sex, go forth and wear ugly sunglasses," she replied with a shrug.
"You're killing me, Kirsten," he whined, and she grinned. Seth emerged from the house and rubbed his hands together.
"That was more fun that you will ever know," he said. Sandy rolled his eyes.
"Are we ready?" Kirsten asked, and when all agreed they got into the car.
"Driver mans the radio!" Sandy called out.
"If I hear any Lyle Lovett, I'm demoting you to the trunk and taking over your position," Kirsten affirmed.
"Or the Thompson Twins," Seth chimed in.
"Soft Cell!" Kirsten added.
"Seger!"
"Janet Jackson!"
"Any other Jacksons...even Jacksons that have been rejected by the musical industry but managed to get albums out anyways!" Their list continued for a good two minutes while Sandy look on, unamused.
"Are you done?" he asked, and Kirsten and Seth exchanged a glance before shrugging.
"I guess we covered everything." Sandy nodded and played with the presets. When he settled on a station, Seth lunged from his seat in protest.
"50 Cent. You're kidding me."
"I like this," Sandy said, turning up the volume in protest. Kirsten rubbed her temples.
"Oh my god. You really are a pimp," Seth said.
"Sandy, please turn this off." He sighed and flipped around, impishly grinning as he settled on something highly synthesized. "No!" Kirsten protested.
"Wham didn't make the forbidden list, you music snobs. This is perfectly legal," Sandy said.
"It's June! Why is 'Last Christmas' on in June?" Seth whimpered.
"How did we forget Wham?" Kirsten asked miserably.
"You might want to get out your headphones, Seth," he said.
"Why?"
"This is one of those songs I just can't help but sing along to."
"Oh, dear god," Seth stopped dead.
"Top of the morning, Seth! You all set to go?"
"Dad, take off the visor. I'm serious." Sandy grinned mischievously and straightened it on his head. "Dad. Not kidding. That visor is...a threat to humanity. That is the most horrible visor I have ever seen. And you might think that visors would be hard to gage, considering the fact that they're all so god awful, but this is by far the worst."
"Ready to hit the road?" Sandy smugly ignored him.
"It's literally glowing."
"I'm sorry, who's the parent here?"
"Dad..."
"Who is it? Answer me that."
"Dad, I—,"
"Who's the parent, Seth?" Seth sighed dejectedly.
"You."
"Why, yes! And as the parent...I'm choosing to wear this blinding orange visor. Got it?"
"Whatever, Dad."
"That's the spirit!"
"I'm seriously going blind, though. It's hurting my eyes." Kirsten exited the house and went straight over to Sandy.
"Hey, Sandy?" She wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him.
"Mm...yeah, hon?" She started to kiss his neck, and just as Seth was about to protest, she grabbed the visor and threw it to him like a Frisbee.
"There is no way that I'm letting you wear a day-glo visor on the Cohen family road trip," she replied cockily. "Seth, if you wouldn't mind disposing of that horrible, horrible visor...then we can be on our way!"
"Oh, man, Mom," Seth shook his head as he headed back inside. "Burn. That was a burn. That was the best burn I've seen in weeks. Dad, it has to be said. You got served."
"I did not!" Sandy called back. "I still have some Ray-Bans hidden in the glove compartment!" Kirsten, her arms still around him, diverted his attention back to her.
"Honey," she said pleasantly, kissing him again. "If the Ray-Bans come out...you are never getting 'served' again."
"You guys don't let me have any fun!"
"If wearing ugly sunglasses is more fun for you than sex, go forth and wear ugly sunglasses," she replied with a shrug.
"You're killing me, Kirsten," he whined, and she grinned. Seth emerged from the house and rubbed his hands together.
"That was more fun that you will ever know," he said. Sandy rolled his eyes.
"Are we ready?" Kirsten asked, and when all agreed they got into the car.
"Driver mans the radio!" Sandy called out.
"If I hear any Lyle Lovett, I'm demoting you to the trunk and taking over your position," Kirsten affirmed.
"Or the Thompson Twins," Seth chimed in.
"Soft Cell!" Kirsten added.
"Seger!"
"Janet Jackson!"
"Any other Jacksons...even Jacksons that have been rejected by the musical industry but managed to get albums out anyways!" Their list continued for a good two minutes while Sandy look on, unamused.
"Are you done?" he asked, and Kirsten and Seth exchanged a glance before shrugging.
"I guess we covered everything." Sandy nodded and played with the presets. When he settled on a station, Seth lunged from his seat in protest.
"50 Cent. You're kidding me."
"I like this," Sandy said, turning up the volume in protest. Kirsten rubbed her temples.
"Oh my god. You really are a pimp," Seth said.
"Sandy, please turn this off." He sighed and flipped around, impishly grinning as he settled on something highly synthesized. "No!" Kirsten protested.
"Wham didn't make the forbidden list, you music snobs. This is perfectly legal," Sandy said.
"It's June! Why is 'Last Christmas' on in June?" Seth whimpered.
"How did we forget Wham?" Kirsten asked miserably.
"You might want to get out your headphones, Seth," he said.
"Why?"
"This is one of those songs I just can't help but sing along to."