It took a while for him to get over the little bit of unrest over the whole thing. Well...getting over it credited him too much. He spent the next ten days wondering about things dealing with drugs, prostitution, physical violence, or death when it concerned K. The more he thought and wondered - and WORRIED - the more he wondered about the past she kept hidden. It was like a whole different side, like a world she was trying to escape or something.

The whole time, he couldn't find anything to respond that DIDN'T deal with the situation at hand. It was the longest he'd ever taken to write her. He wondered if she thought he hated her.

His head shook as he gave the broom a final sweep of everything he collected out the dock opening, feeling cool air of winter sweep his bangs gently. He paused to enjoy it and the sun on his face as he leaned on the shop broom, still in contemplation.

He felt a little bit like an ass now that he stepped away long enough to keep from responding back. 'This seems to be a trend.' He mused, humorlessly snorting. It seemed whatever he did or said hurt K in some form, which was ironic seeing and hearing about such a strong person she was.

He still didn't think whatever happened in her past had to be so horrid that she couldn't share, but he resolved to do as she asked and drop it. For now. A lot of him wanted to know, but he was forcing himself to deal with work more and preoccupy his mind. There was also the side note of what his friends said about him wanting to know so badly.

He COULDN'T be interested in K that way though...could he? He only knew her not even five months, plus she lived forty miles south! He'd never had long distance relationships yet, but he had a feeling something like that wouldn't happen.

A hand quickly whipped out and slapped his forehead, the sting muffled by his bangs. 'Will you STOP thinking like that?!' He ordered, stepping into the storeroom. 'Mou...they got me into an introspective mode that has NOTHING to do with what's going on now!' All he wanted to know was what was going on with K - there was nothing else involved with it!

If he had to think about why he wanted to know so bad...it could be her reluctance to talk about it for one. He was so close to his family and loved to talk about them, both good and bad. Those two things were intertwined in life and if you didn't take the good with the bad, you ran away from life.

Also, he didn't understand her privacy, partly because he never really had that in his household. His family shared their problems and lives openly and rarely held much back. It was common for him to talk to his family about certain things in life, some more than others. Jayden knew almost everything about him and because of that he knew he could go to her with anything. Course, he knew he could go to ANY of his family if he wanted to talk and knew they'd listen, but Jayden understood him on a level that was deeper than just family. She understood him as a sibling, fellow sufferer to some unfair things in life, and roommate. Their ages were the closest out of the others and that also helped.

He often pondered about her reasons for not wanting to tell. Privacy didn't seem to be the only thing, though it was one of them. Did she have issues with her parents and that was why she refused to talk about her life as a child? No...couldn't be...how would someone as nice as K have problems like that? She didn't seem like the type to hate her parents. He couldn't understand how ANYONE could hate their parents actually. Even if he didn't spend as much time as he used to with his, he loved them more than life itself. If anything happened to them - or anyone else in the house - he didn't know WHAT he'd do.

It couldn't deal with sibling issues because he knew she was an only child. And he had no clue about any other family...

He sighed and grabbed a large box that needed to be stocked in the front. Right now it was sad to know how little he knew her. She didn't open herself up to let people see her and he had no clue why she didn't let anyone in that way. The hesitation and isolation was obvious. Was she afraid of something?

Five months almost. Nearly all of that was writing, a few visits and phone calls. Even through words, how was it that he couldn't figure out the girl he called friend?

Hands moved automatically as he priced the tops of the cans and set them in their proper place. He defended her honor to Cameron on more than one occasion, yet she didn't seem to trust him enough to let him in like this. Could he really call that friendship? Didn't friends tell each other things? Not just simple things...didn't they confide in each other when it counted? Right now, he felt as if he knew a stranger. But, he couldn't let that get him down!

I'd like to return to the way we are if you don't mind. I liked that before my life was brought up. We had so much fun then, didn't we? Couldn't we just go back to that and forget this ever came up?

Though he didn't know this girl in the end, they got along rather well regardless. Their personalities ran together for the most part and they had fun when they hung out together.

Shouldn't he comply with her wishes...truly? They had fun and he shouldn't let go of that just because he wanted to find out more about her. If she wanted to keep her life private, he shouldn't deny her that request. He should honor her wishes and not pry. After all...they hadn't known each other that long, had they?

Standing with the now empty box in hand, he walked through the storeroom and out the open door to the dumpster out back. He lifted the lid and a hand brought the box to the hole and stopped. Brown blinked and stared at the open cardboard box for what seemed forever until an idea came to him. The hand laxed and the box dropped in with a low thud before the lid was closed.

It was the seventeenth of December, a week away from the Christian Christmas. He didn't know if K celebrated the holidays, having a feeling she didn't if she didn't even celebrate her birthday. Somewhere in his mind, he had a small inkling that he should get her something.

Of course he didn't celebrate it, and neither did his family...at least not the way it was supposed to be celebrated. They celebrated it as a holiday like the remainder in the city did and closed the store, but took the time off to make a nice dinner and be lazy. They celebrated by being together and take more time to enjoy their meal than normal.

He wanted to do this for her, even without knowing. Just to celebrate friends being together for their first Christmas...and also to apologize for his behavior. He did feel like a heel whenever she came to mind - which was a lot - and felt the need to make it up to her. That most likely came from him always making it up to Cameron, but this was him ACTUALLY at fault this time. He didn't leave her alone when she asked and kept pressing. A good friend didn't do that, they let the other tell what was on their mind at their own time. A good friend let the other come when they felt the need to, not because of harassment.

He hadn't been a very good friend in his eyes. Saying sorry didn't cover it because he had a feeling whatever involved K's past was something she held deep, and she wouldn't take his apology even if it came face to face. He also had a feeling she wouldn't be able to take it if he gave it face to face. She'd write it off as being no big deal and try to pretend it never happened. He didn't know K, but he knew people like that...people who ran instead of facing what they needed to. Shy to extremely shy people who didn't deal with others and therefore, didn't know how to handle simple things like that.

Perhaps a present could signify a small olive branch between them. A way that things could get back to normal and she didn't have to worry about his pestering anymore. It was worth a shot...

~*~*~

The rest of his time was spent in constant contemplation, but over a different topic this time. He didn't want to give something along the same thing like during her birthday. He wanted anything he gave to have special meaning, therefore being different...individualistic.

And how would he know that unless he wrote her and asked?

This would be the first letter in over a week, but - as he pulled the chair closer to the desk, trying not to tear tatami - he resolved to stick to what was on his mind THIS time. No more asking when she already made her answer glaringly clear.

K,

I bet you're surprised to get a letter from me in so long huh? Sorry about that, I've had a lot on my mind.

So are things still the same with you in ten days? My life is still as boring as ever, but you probably knew that with as stable as it is overall. Not even in ten days have I had something wild and crazy happen to me.

I wanted to ask you something that just occurred that I haven't asked you yet. I don't know anything about your taste in music. I know that's out of left field and totally unprepared, but I was thinking about music today and realized I don't know what you listen to. What DO you listen to? And what do you hate? You already know I hate pop music with a passion and love alternative. I also listen to some old-style rock, oldies type - though I bet you couldn't picture me and that together, Japanese music - which is a no-duh, and - JUST between you and me - I favor a few romance type songs. But there's no way I'm telling you what ones because I have a feeling you'll find the ones you don't know just to see what they are. Kidding.

Anyway...moving on. I also wondered if you celebrated Christmas. I know I did this last time and you'll probably figure it out because you're that clever...so I'll just be up front and say it. I wanted to get you something, but I didn't really know what, and I know the only way I get ideas is by asking.

You know I don't take that day much to heart - not in the religious way - but I do spend time with people and whatnot. Me and my family used to get each other a small something, but finally settled on a long, involved family dinner...which is still the same in the way. I wouldn't mind getting you something.

I hope you don't write me back and tell me not to bother because my mind is already made up. I intend on getting you something, now I just need a few details to make my choice clear. You know me...I'm stubborn-headed.

I hope you can reply to this rather fast, because I'm on a time limit. I have some surprises - which I hope I didn't give away - I intend to spring, and I'd like to be able to do them.

Waiting for your reply - hint hint,

Inaki

December 17, 2097

He hated dodging the most blatant issue by pretending to rewind time to where he hadn't asked and changed things. This unresolved - and purposely ignored - conflict was never going away unless a conversation could be had to end this. One could argue with him in saying that right now, there WAS no issue because it wasn't being discussed. Except it was being shoved into the dark without him understanding anything about it. K's secretiveness was not helping his stubbornness right now.

He sighed and put the addresses on the front, reaching for the stamps.

The issue, whatever the hell it was, would just have to wait until he could figure it out. Perhaps if he spent more time around her, he could find reasons on his own and not have to ask anymore.

Had his curiosity and concern lessened at all in ten days, and doing what Kalie asked?

Not one damn bit.

He stood and left the room, taking his time to get to the front door.

He snatched a windbreaker along with his shoes and board, as the weather had gotten to low fifties as a high. The cool afternoon air always felt nice, but the nights were cold and it didn't help.

There was no one in the immediate area to announce his leaving, as most were in different floors or outside puttering around, so he grabbed the keys and shut the door.

"Oi, Inaki...where are you off to?"

Brown jerked over, finding his father with a broom in his hands in front of the driveway. He held up the letter. "I'll be back soon otousan." He called, boarding to the concrete marker that made up their house. He stopped enough to push the gate open and latch it before heading down the walk.

He wondered what K was doing right now. It was nearly four...was she in school right now? He didn't have her exact schedule, only knew she was taking four classes this semester. He knew she wasn't at work, as she worked the late shift during the week. He hoped she would be warm enough during her rides home, since the weather down south couldn't be much warmer. The combination of gentle wind and cloudless sun made the day another perfect one to board into town. Even though he didn't like winter that much, he still liked these types. The days were as beautiful as they were in the fall.

Stopping before the mailbox, a foot landed on the concrete. One hand held open the lid to drop the letter in, his other holding it in eyesight.

This felt wrong to do, what they were doing, but he had no choice really. If he didn't want to lose K as a friend, he had to comply and bend. Even if he didn't like it.

Lithe fingers gripped the letter a little tighter as his jaw clenched. He didn't want to do this; a part of him was saying to not send the letter. At least not in its current form.

He heaved a sigh as brown closed. He could be a real prick and ass when he wanted to be, whether on purpose or not. Privacy was not a big thing with him, given everything in his life. To his family and the musketeers he'd known since past high school. He told them everything, well PRACTICALLY everything. He had nothing to hide except his only secret, and that might as well not exist with as old as it was. He should be forgiving of someone he didn't know, he honestly should. Perhaps give it another five months to see if he gained a little more of K's trust before trying again.

He didn't want to let go of this without ending it on a better note. He wasn't that type of person who let things go without a word.

When brown peeked open at the gap to blue metal, they had hardened with resolve. He wouldn't let this go forever, but he would for now. He didn't want to spend the rest of his friendship - for however long it would be - not knowing K. If he had to push her again, he would. He didn't want to know part of a person. If he gave of himself, it was only reasonable to give in return. He was taught that by his parents, by his grandparents.

Agreeing with his thoughts, his hand directed the letter over the blackness and let go. Brown watched it fall out of sight before the door creaked close and he headed home.