I'm going under
Drowning in you
I'm falling forever
I've got to break through
I'm going under
Blurring and stirring the truth and the lies
So I don't know what's real and what's not
Always confusing the thoughts in my head
So I can't trust myself anymore
I'm dying again
I'm going under
Drowning in you
I'm falling forever
I've got to break through
So go on and scream
Scream at me I'm so far away
I won't be broken again
I've got to breathe, I can't keep going under
A hand suddenly waved in her vision and she blinked, craning her sight back enough to see behind.
The hand clutching her portable quickly clicked pause, as if getting caught with something bad.
That little episode nearly cost the player, though she still didn't know what possessed her to try and break it in the first place. The music wasn't the reason because she was still listening to it.
Miraculously, the cd wasn't damaged as it twisted enough to land flat against the wall. The main piece was still together, but the solar battery cover was gone and she had to get a new one for the one that fell out and cracked.
"Kalie? K...honey...why are you laying on the floor like this? You have your bed you know..."
She blinked, but stayed put. Even green watched as Sam slowly crossed the room and sat on her bed next to the calves that already rested there.
She had never seen Sam so visibly agitated before...except for that day she nearly killed herself. Worry was written everywhere, but not one clear way to express it.
Sam mildly freaked out and scolded her the day she nearly broke the player, but one look at her face quickly shut her up.
"Kalie...I'm worried about you, you know. I don't know what's gotten into you! You're not yourself – you have to tell me what's wrong!"
She kept staring, mouth not moving. Green went back to watching the ceiling.
It hadn't been a week since her doctor's visit. She had so long to wait and it was starting to build. The whole week was tense at home since her stunt and she knew Sam was waiting for another explosion. She hadn't given one since and it was like the intense anger there fizzled out and that was her only shot.
It was all getting to her, that's the only thing she could say. It was the only explanation she had that kept her from getting angry. Strangely enough, that seemed to fit, even if it never stopped the attacks...or the different smells...or the noises...
The breathing never returned, but at night when she was trying to sleep, she swore could hear the very faint sound of a heartbeat other than her own in her ears. It was another one of those creepy movie scenes where the heart rate accentuated to increase the suspense.
Her life was one big horror movie lately, but nothing really awful happened. No calls with someone dying, and no one tried to kidnap, rape, or hurt her. If something bad was going to happen, it was way past normal time limit.
A light, tentative touch on a calf gained her attention and green shot to her friend. She sent a quiet, inquiring glance, but still didn't say a word.
"K...I don't know if you'll talk to me or not... You have a problem with opening up to me about things. I accept that there're some things you won't tell me...so I called Inaki and asked him to come get you out of here for a while. You seem to be able to tell him anything, so I figure he might be able to help whatever is going on with you."
She merely stared after Sam finished. Was she supposed to be angry at that? Was she supposed to be embarrassed or guilty because she told Inaki things she wouldn't speak with a cattle prod nudging her to cooperation otherwise?
She hadn't seen Inaki all week and hadn't got to see him last weekend due to the appointment and the first few weeks of class were always the hardest.
"When does he get here?"
Sam fidgeted a little, unnerved by the lack of emotion in K's voice and eyes. "I called him a while ago. You've probably been listening to music the whole time so you wouldn't have heard. He should be here soon."
It wasn't like Sam to ramble on so – she must be creeping the girl out more than she thought.
Her head lightly thumped on carpet as she went back to the ceiling. "Okay. Have him come up when he gets here."
Sam's mouth opened to protest, to try and use this as an opportunity to talk some sense into her friend, but quiet music from the floor told her she was shut out.
Sam gave a small, tight nod and left, knowing she wouldn't get anything else in to say. She shut the door and leaned against it. Anger and frustration built as she sagged against the support. The energy seemed to be sapped by walking on eggshells with her friend.
The whole week saw a rapid degeneration and there seemed to be no cause for it. Sam could tell because she knew K – or liked to think she did...
It was noticeable in times like this when K skirted her studies to listen to whatever cd in the player now. She saw in the extreme paleness spotted in the morning when K stumbled in for breakfast...as though suffering from a batch of nightmares.
There was nothing to be done if K didn't say a word. She never did it seemed and there was always this helplessness that wouldn't go away. Sam hated that feeling, but there was no getting around it. She had to get over it, and it was a skill she was getting rather good at.
Sam's jaw clenched at everything K was putting her through and a fist slammed against the door. She doubted K heard that through noise. Heaving a sigh, she strode for downstairs to find something to take her mind off all this.
I tried to kill the pain but only brought more
I lay dying and I'm pouring crimson regret and betrayal
I'm dying, praying, bleeding, and screaming
Am I too lost to be saved?
Am I too lost?
My God; my tourniquet
Return to me salvation
My God; my tourniquet
Return to me salvation
She shivered as the lyrics reminded her of her suicide attempt, but green never wavered its emotionless stare on stucco. She was content to shut out the real world and listen to these songs that kept playing.
Every song struck a chord over something in her life, whether it was years ago or yesterday. She could pick apart lyrics and find something if she got the mini-booklet containing the words and read them. She already did earlier and now could hear all clearly.
She was NOT in good shape and knew that...but when listening to this couldn't bring herself to care. She wasn't herself and knew that too.
She maintained a shell of her life – going to school and getting notes, working, studying with actual retention – but not much thought was put into it during quiet times. School and work were hard to act like this, as it seemed difficult to grasp emotions to get caught up in. It was like a mask she put on...like a persona she slipped into...but it wasn't easy without the right stimulus.
Like this music.
The occurrences were getting to her, coming almost normally now, and she was diving into the realm of madness to let them come. The only consolation was...by NOT being herself and obsessing over hearing or smelling them when they came, the spells stopped coming.
That was something she was glad for, but also wondered about.
The door suddenly swung open and nearly hit her in the head. Her vision whipped off the ceiling in surprise and blinked at something she forgot about.
Inaki's arrival.
Near dead green locked with stunned brown. He stared for what seemed eternity, the quiet enough to let him recognize the music she was listening to.
That was one of the more morbid cds he owned. To find her sitting like this, with that look in her eyes, while listening to that scared the shit out of him.
He stepped aside and shut the door, trying not to slam it in haste. She was a sight for sore eyes and he missed her greatly, but right now she was worrying him to no end.
"What the hell are you doing?!" He asked, hands going for the portable. He took it without waiting for anything and quickly shut it off.
It was like severing a limb. She blinked a few times at the buzzing in her ears from the effect of noise level before gradually sitting up. She stared at the bed, back to Inaki, before a hand slowly unhooked the buds.
He watched her idly set them on the bed and wondered if she was angry for shutting the music off like that. He didn't knock, but one peep to the level told him she wouldn't have heard.
He swallowed, mind furiously trying to figure out what the hell was going on here! The person sitting before him he recognized by physical features...the personality in those emerald eyes was all but gone.
What the hell happened in the time he was away?!
He inched forward and put a hand on a shoulder, startling a little when she turned. She stared with no hint of shyness or that she would look away at any second. She was meeting his eyes with no problem.
'How the hell did she do that so soon??' In all the time he spent with her, NOW she was doing this?! 'What the fuck??'
Now he understood Sam's frustration when she called. He couldn't imagine what the girl had to live through for the past month.
"K, what's going on?"
She blinked and leaned against the edge of the daybed. She regarded him as coolly as if dealing with someone she barely knew. He didn't know if she knew she had that look, but was getting REALLY uneasy seeing it.
Was she coming unglued from school?? Was this some kind of breakdown? He didn't have answers, but knew he had to do something to jog her from this.
He had no thoughts of how to go about this, but his body moved closer and seemed to know. He pulled her into his arms, a little shocked that she was initially stiff. She hadn't been such since before they started dating!
It was like a rush of ice water dumped on her senses. His move was as bold as it was unexpected, but she always felt comfortable and safe in his warmth. She belonged there and it was a main catalyst for the change in mindset.
Her body almost slunk against him as her face buried in his chest, breathing in cologne. She missed that smell - missed him. How had she not known that??
She was in love with this man, yet suddenly acknowledged she called him only a few times in a month and sent no letters. The letters weren't that big a deal, as they were initially for pen pal reasons and a means of communication. It seemed pointless now that they used face-to-face or telephone.
Her brow furrowed as her head turned to stare at the far wall. What was she doing obsessing over those things recently? It took hold and she let it – whatever happened to that strength she thought she had?
He could tell when she was better by the way she held him back. He couldn't begin to describe the relief that came and gave a small sigh into her hair. The ever-present smell of vanilla rose and he used its familiarity to gain control.
A hand stroked her back and a smile tipped her lips. She missed his touch and a small emotion hit below the belt. Her skin tingled from the sensation, having missed it and what it brought when she was with him.
It brought chaos, but she had never felt such deep, physical need than when she was with him that way.
"Feeling better now?"
She didn't want to move to answer, but didn't want to make him think she passed out. She shifted far enough away to see him and smiled. "Hello you..." She gave a deep, gentle kiss. Another tingle ran over her body and she indulged a little, unable to help herself around him.
He clutched her, more relieved that she seemed to be back to normal. The feel of her in his arms brought back memories he relived on many a night in a solitary bed. His tongue ran over hers, the top of her mouth, and around teeth to map her mouth again.
He missed her so much it was rather scary...
When they pulled away, she wanted to bury her face, but he made to stand and helped her up. "Come on, I've been ordered to take you out of here and I'm doing so. Plus there's something I wanted to show you."
She was intrigued and his wink made her wonder exactly what he wanted to show her. She had to admit, her mind went gutter as he led the way out, keeping their hands clasped.
"We're heading out Sam – don't wait up!"
"Hey! She's got work tomorrow you know! Don't make her too tired!"
She stumbled over the bottom step and clutched Inaki to keep from hurting herself. Her face flamed a little, though she thought she was beyond that by now.
"You shut up Sam!" She shouted back, glaring in the direction of the kitchen.
There was no answer, but a quiet padding met her ears as she went for shoes. By the time they were on and she grabbed keys, she found Sam leaning against the wall next to the stairs with arms crossed and an unreadable expression.
Green and blue stared for a second as she tried to read her friend. A brow finally rose as she grew a little irritated. "What? You're not imagining us naked are you?"
At length, a slow smile appeared on Sam's face, relief in her eyes. "No... Nothing like that." She quietly answered. Slowly, Sam pushed off the wall and turned for the kitchen. Tears blurred in her eyes of thankfulness and more dissatisfaction. K seemed back to herself...but this was another confusion that would never get explained.
She blinked and made for the door. "What was that all about?"
Brown spied a glance, wondering if she knew she was contradicting herself. "You tell me." He replied, almost wanting to stay out of it. He held the screen door open as she locked the inside.
She stared at the wood as if trying to think of an answer before shaking her head and turning for his car. "So...are you going to tell me what you're going to show me, or do I have to wait?" She stopped, nearly making him run into her, and turned to put hands on his chest. She leaned against him, getting arms around her waist. "Because depending on what you want to show me and how long you intend on showing me, I don't think I can wait."
His grin was positively evil as he caught her innuendo and leaned to devour her lips. When he pulled away, leaving her breathless, arms squeezed. "A little sexually repressed are we?"
She gave a small pout. "You saw what happened after two years buddy...a month is going to be about the same after I got a taste of it again."
A raven brow rose as he fought arousal at that one. "Do tell... Does this mean I'm going to turn you into a little nympho now? Because I honestly don't have a problem with that so long as I'm with you at the time."
Green widened as a hand slapped a shoulder. "Perv! I don't do self-preservation! That's a guy thing."
He smirked. "Oh please. You think women don't do that as much as guys? It makes me wonder just how you were able to last two years."
She gave a dry look. "Dork. Think – at that time...was I in ANY kind of mood for physical gratification?"
He pulled from the finger tapping his forehead and shook her off. "Mayhap not, but how do I know you haven't done so in the past month?"
She stared for a second before a brow went up. She immediately stepped back. "Why ARE we having this conversation in the middle of the front lawn again??"
He looked around with a grin. "You started it, not me."
Green looked to the sky. "Then I'll end it thank you." She turned to the car, but didn't get far as arms pulled her back to a breathing wall. The air went out of her, but the familiar feel of him pressing against her got her low and heavy. Fingers spread over her stomach – rising a little too high to be descent – but her head dropped to his shoulder in bliss. "You're not going to grope me in public...are you?" She panted.
Lips met an ear. "I might...I haven't done anything that kinky yet. Why?"
Her lids fluttered at his ministrations. "Because, I don't know if I'll be able to...contain myself."
"Hm. We could just head off into the woods and never be seen again..."
"Don't tempt me." Hands snapped into motion and one snaked in between their bodies to run down the front of his fly, catching him right where it counted.
He wasn't prepared for that and teeth bit her lower lobe at the jerk his body gave. He licked the spot, trying to take the ache out, but ended up doing worse damage...if the faster motion of her hand was any indication.
"We have to stop." He rasped, pulling away.
"Mm...stopping is good." She mumbled, pressing against him. "But I missed you."
He tried to swallow, unable to do so. "And you have no clue how close I am to saying fuck my original goal and using that word for a different meaning...but I DID have something to show you."
She was almost disappointed. Her body was throbbing in anticipation, but there was mental cold water dumped when he stepped away.
She giggled a little as hands stuck in front pockets to disassociate the other bulge to his jeans and was glad to be a woman at that moment.
He could hear her quite well and was almost prepared to torment her to the point of pain that he was in. He only stopped because he knew the family wouldn't be gone ALL afternoon and wanted to show her while they were gone.
He didn't know what they'd think about K seeing that. Sure he knew they liked her and probably considered her family, but this was massive. No one outside the family knew about this – not even the guys who he knew for over a decade – and they might take offense if he did it without their permission.
Something inside said it was okay to show it to her. He found the one and in doing so, knew she would understand enough to not consider him a freak when he told the story that went along with the object in hiding.
So where is everyone?" She asked, setting her shoes neatly next to his. Her toes wiggled against the carpet to warm against the coolness of the genkan tiles.
"They went to a movie. It wasn't until after dinner, so they left about half an hour ago." He explained, striding past. He stopped in the kitchen and heard her follow. He stood in the center and faced her, face solemn.
"Inaki...what –"
"Kalie...you know I trust you right?"
Green blinked at the use of her name. "Of course I do. I – I trust you too." She looked to the tatami. "I've...trusted you for a while actually. I'm sorry I never told you."
He was glad to know that as it was a key component for making up his mind. He brought her here, but there were still a few doubts. As long as she trusted him, he could trust her to keep this quiet.
This was one aspect she would want to know if she wanted to know everything about him. He had to admit, the need to tell her was getting overpowering lately and he did some serious thinking about it. Now he knew and it was a weight off his shoulders.
He smiled. "That's okay, I can accept that. It is nice to know though...because I think you're going to need that for what I'm about to tell you."
She startled a little. "What is it?? Is something wrong??"
He was by her side in an instant. "No! I'm sorry, that came out wrong." He directed her to sit on the table and moved back to red. "I wanted to share things with you that I never told to my other girlfriends, but that was kind of hard. You know I'll talk about myself without compunctions, but there IS something not even my friends know." He turned and green met brown. "This's something you have to swear never to tell to anyone, to never take out of this house. The family knows about this, but that's it."
She sat up straight, heart racing. "I swear on my life I won't tell anyone." Worry pricked her veins. "You...didn't kill anyone right?"
He grinned and shook his head. "Wouldn't think of it – you know I'm not a fan of violence." He kneeled and met her eyes again. "This isn't that serious, but it IS odd enough that I could be labeled a medical miracle...or a freak by the general populous."
A brown brow rose. Inaki, a freak?? Something as delicious looking as him? Not possible. Whatever he was talking about had to be overreaction talking.
Brown moved to the tiles, mentally counting from the wall. He shifted back as his count took him to the near center and started tapping on porcelain with his knuckles.
She blinked, head tilting in confusion. "Uh... What are you doing?"
"Shh...it's here somewhere."
Her head jerked back a little as she watched. There was the same pitch to all except one when he finally hit it and her eyes narrowed in wonder. How was it she walked over that spot and never noticed it was hollow? And hollow for WHAT??
"Gotcha." He muttered, prying the tile off. He gently set it aside to keep from scraping anything and grabbed a few strings and tugged. The box was a tight fit, but it wasn't supposed to be loose or the noise would attract attention.
Green avidly took in a plain, small wood box. It wasn't anything special, so what was he going on about?
Her brow deeply furrowed as it was shown in better lighting. She could see his eyes, but ignored them in favor of what was in his hand. For some reason, whatever was in there was badly enticing her to yank the lid off and see what it was.
Her skin was tingling and she didn't understand. It was like the feeling she got when her foot went asleep.
And the lightheadedness was returning with a vengeance.
"Before I show you this, I have to tell you about it or you won't understand what makes this such a big deal." He shifted to get comfortable and waited until he had her attention. That seemed rather difficult as it appeared fixated on the box.
Which was odd, as this was the first time she ever laid eyes on it.
"I was born a normal baby in weight and height. I had no physical problems and was brought home the normal time. My parents fed me well and kept me free of diseases and infections. But during my first checkup, the doctors found something odd that they've never seen before." He looked to the patio nervously, shifting a little, before finding courage to continue. "They did x-rays, which I still have, and found this. They're amazed it didn't kill me, or that it was there at all. My family considered it a sign that I was special, though for what reason or purpose I have no clue. I had surgery as soon as I was able to – seeing as it wasn't life threatening and in no need to remove immediately – and they gave it to us to keep. When I was old enough, my parents told me about it and showed me this."
The tingling sensation grew worse to the point of not being able to feel the tips of her fingers or toes as the box edged open. She blinked as the edges of her sight grayed, but didn't go away. The wooziness didn't gain a spell, but there was definitely something triggering all this.
She learned none of this was brought on by itself; everything had a reason...and right now it was coming from that box.
He pushed the simple lid up and tipped the box. With his palm carefully positioned to catch, he cradled it and set the box nearby.
Green stared in confusion and question at a small ball. It looked like one used in the game of marbles, but something told her this was too valuable for such a trivial thing.
It wasn't chipped or scratched in any way. She didn't know what a marble, a fleshy pink marble, was doing inside him like that. It was total sci-fi and she could only stare.
"They removed this from my right lung. They said it nestled against the side, right next to my heart. Baffled the experts for years."
She was barely conscious of a hand reaching out to try and touch it. She felt a near physical desire to hold it, to feel its mass. Before she knew it, she was on her feet and almost in touching distance.
"K? What..."
She couldn't take her eyes off the marble. "That's...so beautiful...it's amazing..."
She suddenly paused all movement, feeling the fine hairs on the back of her neck stand. It was like she was being watched and a cold finger went up her spine.
She blinked a few times, still trying to clear her vision, and stared at the marble with almost a hint of recollection. She - she knew this thing... Where had she seen it before? In a department store or something? Maybe someone handcrafted something out of glass like this?
No... She knew this already...knew it instinctively as she knew a part of her body.
How?
The hairs lowered as if a threat were removed and there was an instantaneous bright flash that blinded her. She cried out and stumbled back, hands going to her face.
Vertigo arrived and brought on nausea so bad she almost lost everything then and there. It made the room sway and even with legs spread for balance, she dropped heavily to her knees. Hands helped support her on the tatami.
"KALIE!?" He dropped the ball in shock when hands went to steady her. It rolled forward across the tile without skipping into the lines...almost with a will of its own. It headed straight for her and slowed to a stop almost unnaturally.
She stared, seeing a bright glow emanating from it. A hand shifted and slowly grasped it.
She gasped and felt the wind knocked from her when contact was made.
"I love you...you know that right?"
"You can't leave me!"
"I'm...sorry, but...I have to..."
"Damn it! Don't do this to me! You CAN'T leave!"
"Please...don't forget me..."
She crunched into a ball at the onslaught, fist tight around the marble. The sheer force of emotion evoked created tears and they fell unheeded as two echoing voices were accompanied by flashes of sight. There were one second shots of color, faces she knew she could remember if they lasted long enough.
A rainbow of emotions surged and she felt every one as if they were her own. She didn't understand how or what was happening, but it all seemed to fit...like a key component to the life she always wanted and missed out on.
In that split second, she felt more than her entire life; adventure, the knowledge of a loving family, deep friendship, and a purpose.
He was hoping she would understand, but he didn't expect an asthmatic seizure! Her body was trembling as if incredibly frightened and she was panting as if unable to catch her breath. He was scared out of his mind and couldn't figure out what to do this time. She was nearly pressed into herself and one arm was clutching her head, the other holding the marble in a death grip.
"KALIE!" He shouted, hearing her whimper. Hands whipped out and shook her, trying to jog her attention from whatever the hell was going on. "Shi - shikkari sh - shimasu yo!"
Her crying neared hysterical, sobbing proportions and she had no clue why. There were more pictures, these a lot slower than the first time this happened, and the noises were much easier to pick out. She didn't know if that was a good thing or not.
The memories stopped on one person, one she seemed to know clearly...yet had never met before. She only had a facial shot with a frame of long, thick, oddly-colored bangs brushing into very unique eyes. There was something she remembered seeing about those eyes...
Indifference.
Pride.
Intensity.
Anger.
Love.
She cried out as another bright flash got through the slits of tightly closed eyes and they shot open as she felt something definite in her mind. She stared at the tendrils of light shining from holes in her fist in amaze and fear.
:The wish is complete...you two are now together.:
She blinked, eyes widening to pain at the clear female voice as she ignored Inaki above and slowly unhinged to sit up. She saw him pull away, but it seemed like his voice didn't exist. It was very faint, though he was only inches away.
'Wish?' She pondered. 'I didn't wish for anything...'
:It will be remembered with time.:
She immensely startled and nearly dropped the marble. The shining slowly fluttered out until it died completely, going back to a beautiful, pink color. She held it up to the mid afternoon sun and looked through it, but it was too thick to do so.
He took in her appearance and the way she seemed entranced by the object in her hand. He was fearful to touch her in case she came unglued again, but had to know she was okay.
"Kalie? Are you...alright?"
Her head jerked his way. She felt ashamed of what happened; being the only person who had experience in that kind of supernatural...WHATEVER it was...and wished the ground would swallow her up.
She nodded. "Ee." She muttered, a fierce blush heating her face.
Brown widened in shock. "WHAT did you say??" He breathed, mouth agape.
She looked up in confusion. "I said I'm fine." How could he not hear??
He mentally shook himself, wondering where to ask first. Before he could, she looked away and slowly held her palm out. He dumbly took the ball, staring at it as if it would do the same to him – although it had never been anything other than a simple marble despite its origins.
Slowly, he made for the box and gently set it inside. He replaced everything exactly and pushed the tile to keep from getting pulled up easily by a wandering foot.
Finally, he sat back and stared...only to find she was already doing that.
She was staring life a child of blatant curiosity to comprehend something she was looking at. He would understand it if she was pointing that gaze at the ball, but green was directed right at him.
He blinked, brow furrowing. "K...what is it??"
She startled and rapidly blinked, shifting back. "Ah...nothing... It's – it's nothing...I -" She gasped as vertigo came hard and fast. A hand went to her head, eyes squeezing shut. It lasted and twirled her perceptions longer than it ever had. Nausea arrived as bad as it did when the light flashed and she felt sick.
She feebly twisted and scrambled to her feet, eyes on the stairs. She wouldn't be able to scale up, but down was no problem.
Somehow, she made it to the lower level bathroom in time to lose her lunch without further embarrassment.
He tried to shut out the sounds of retching, but it was impossible. The emotion he had for her and the helplessness of not knowing what she was going through clenched his heart and he stood, making his way for the door. He slid the patio glass open and stepped onto the engawa without shoes. In a few steps, he went to the railing and heavily leaned on it, tears lining his eyes.
It was minutes before she gained the strength to lift her head, let alone stand and clean up. She quickly washed her mouth a few times and tried to be presentable. The fear of what happened in the kitchen, and the mortification of what it must've seemed like, made her want to hide the rest of her life in here. But she couldn't – she had to deal with this and TRY to start explaining her way through.
Taking a deep breath for courage, she ambled out and up the steps, only to find her host shifted position. Feet scuffled on the carpet before she mentally ordered herself to move.
He tracked her movements with hearing, feeling worse instead of better when hands timidly rested over his back. He felt almost as horrible as he did that day on the boat and couldn't explain the reason for it. He did nothing wrong this time.
But he had the distinct feeling that with that touch, K was hiding something and trying to make up for it. He just knew it. He knew because he knew her.
"Inaki...I...that was...I'm..."
He took a deep breath and turned to face her. Whatever she did or did not tell him, he couldn't help the need to comfort her whenever she adopted that lost tone. His chin rested on her head as he blankly stared at the sky. She clutched him tightly and he took comfort in the fact that she wasn't turning away at least.
At length, he sighed. "Whatever happened in that room...stays in that room." He felt her head shift to look at him, but he wasn't done. "My family wouldn't be very pleased with me showing you that because not only have I done so without consulting them, but we're a family – this is something very touchy with us. I showed it to you in confidence...and I won't tell a soul of whatever happened to you."
She blinked and pulled away enough to pin him with a confused gaze. "You...didn't see?? How could you NOT? It was so bright!"
He was just as confused. "I don't know what you're talking about. One minute I had the ball in my hand, the next you cried out and dropped to the floor." Hands rose and wiped her face of any remaining tears that hadn't dried by now. "I don't know what happened...but you seem to be taking it better than I think you should."
She looked away when his eyes turned skeptical and suspicious.
"I've...been getting dizzy spells recently." She timidly supplied. "They've gotten rather bad lately, so I went to the doctor last Sunday, but they won't give me my results for a few weeks."
Worry fingered his veins. "It's nothing serious though right?? It's just simple dizziness?"
She wasn't going to tell him of the noises or sounds until she had truth first. Waiting was easier than changing minds. "I don't know...that's why I went. I wish I could find out sooner, but it's not possible."
"You call me the second you get results. I don't care if I'm in the middle of moping the back room – I want to know!" He ordered. A hand moved and forced her to look at him. "You never told me about this...and you never told Sam."
"I didn't want you two freaking out. I've been doing enough of that for the three of us. It wouldn't have gotten us anywhere you know..."
Brown hardened a little. "No excuse. She's your best friend and I'm your boyfriend! You say you trust me - that means with anything. I accept that you trust me, but you have to find out what that word means. How long are you going to keep holding off telling me things until they do this to you??"
Properly chastised. Sam would've been proud.
Her head ducked and hid in his chest again. "I know...I know... I'll tell you the results when I get them back."
"AND Sam."
Her head shot up. "But -"
"Sam has been putting up with a lot of frustration of not knowing how to deal with you. I could tell when she called and all but ordered me to get you out of the house. If you didn't notice before we left, she was rather timid around you. I've never seen her like that. You can at least tell her as a way of apologizing."
She nodded. "You're right... I just hope she doesn't hold it against me..."
Arms went to their snug positions again. "She's your best friend. I don't because I know you've got issues with it. It just takes time."
But time was not something he was going to easily wait for, not when it concerned the girl in his arms, and not something so serious with her physical or mental health.
I am a BEGINNER Japanese learner...so if these are not 100% correct...please let me know if you care to do so. I only have a web page to learn from, a dictionary, and a few months experience to work with.
Translations: Shikkari shimasu yo!-Get a hold of yourself! Ee-Like hai in agreement (For females only, female is Aa)
Singer: Evanescence Titles: Going Under and Tourniquet (in that order)