Hi! Did you guys miss me? (cricket chirps) Wow…. Ummmm… I guess not. You all will be glad to know that Darien has a bigger role in this chappie! Btw you guys kick ass! I was gonna wait a few days to post this chapter. And then I read the reviews and was undecided. It was either this or the movies. This is free and I didn't have a ride sooo……On with the da fic!

p.s for shame you guys I've forgotten the disclaimer! Oh well look for the first chapter. I'm too lazy.

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Down with Love

Chapter 4

Expect the Unexpected

----------------------------------------- (Darien's pov)

I landed on the top of the roof thanking the helicopter pilot and saying good-bye to the Pavona triplets. It didn't help settle the anger I felt at Andrew. I walked through the building till I got to his door. I was going to play it cool. Cool dammit! I opened the door and waited for the barrage of questions. 5..4..3..2..

"DARIEN! Where have you been? That story on Russian spies in America was supposed to be on the presses by now!" I just walked by him and sat down. "Andy, relax. The Pavona triplets and I went on a little trip to Hawaii to have some fun in the sun at a party there." I reached over and poured myself a drink. Andrew was still running around like a chicken with its head cut off.

 "I can't relax, Dare. That story was important and you wasted time playing with the triplets!" he was now pacing bak and forth. This was fun to watch. I think I'll drop the bomb now. I pull out the story and a pass from NASA. Andrew stopped dead in his tracks. "You…got the story. You bastard you got the story. Why didn't you tell me?" he grabbed my shirt and started shaking me around. "It turned out NASA was having a party a Hawaii and guess who happened to be there hiding out on that same island?" Andrew's eyes would have popped out of his head if they had gotten any bigger.

"The Russians! Darien you genius I could kiss you if I didn't go for the female persuasion." He skipped. Yes, skipped back to his desk." This ought to knock LGM out of the water." I froze. Out of all the times to remind me he chose now. My gaze hardened. Andrew shrunk waiting for the outburst but it never came. I got up and it was my turn to pace this time.

Shit! I was not going to yell I was not going to yell I was not going to yell I was not-Fuck it!

"Why the hell didn't you tell me?" I slammed my fists down on the desk. That was going to hurt the next day, but I'll be damned before I let anyone know it hurt!

Ow.

Andrew sat back in his chair and smirked at me. The little bastard knew all along how good Serena looked. It seems I'm the only one who didn't. "Hey Dare if you hadn't have stood her up all those times you would have found out on your own. By the way, those excuses…she didn't fall for 'em." You know what he did? He laughed. It's not funny. I need something to take my rage off him for now.

So I kicked his chair and sent him sprawling backwards.

What?

Tell me you haven't thought about doing that just once? "Andy, it's bad enough the girl-" "Woman." he interjected "And a mad one at that." I didn't give a damn if she was a gorilla she was going to pay!

"Ok. It's bad enough the WOMAN looks good, but now she has a whole world of women eating out of her hands! I haven't gotten laid in 2 weeks! 2 WEEKS, ANDY! DO YOU KNOW HOW LONG THAT IS?!" I had to stop for a second to catch my breath. This girl was trouble. I needed to think. "This Serena Stone had to have her heart broken by some man. I need to find out whom." I snatched out my cell phone and called the private investigator.

I'll find out just what Miss Serena Stone was hiding yet.

"That's it!" I stood up and began to pace around the room. Andrew lifted and eyebrow at this.

"What's it?"

"I'll get the scoop on little Miss Down with Love and expose her for the fraud she really is." It was brilliant. "And how the hell to you plan to get close enough to even breathe the same air she does without being dismembered?" By now he was standing also from his position on the ground. That's what he gets….

"Easy." I pulled out a pair of glasses and ruffled my hair. All I needed to finish the look was the country boy accent. "By going under cover as………..Catcher Block, NASA astronaut." (sorry guys the temptation was just too strong. Lol. )

-------------------------------------------------------------- (sere pov…again)

Finally.

A day where I can just sit back and relax. Do nothing but sit around and eat chocolate to my heart's desire.

Too bad that's the last thing I want to do. My doorbell rang. Great who was coming to harass me now? I padded quietly along the cool hardwood floor. Just to be safe I look out the peephole. What was Mina doing here? Didn't she have a date or something? I'll admit it took some time to open all 3 locks. What? I'm not paranoid.

I live in New York. (GoOoOoOoOoOo Boogie Down! Opps hee hee srry. I was born in NY)

"Hey Sere I just wanted to stop by and see how things were going." She turned around and inspected me. Uh oh. The jig was up. "Why the long face? Trouble in paradise?" she shrugged off her jacket and strode into the living room. It's scary how she knows the place a little better than I do sometimes. You know?...Okay maybe you don't (sigh)

"Do you have a date tonight?" So I was trying to change the subject…SUE ME! And I mean that in the nicest possible way. Really. "Of course! Now stop trying to change the subject. The question is do YOU have a date tonight?" she sat down beside me and looked me in the eyes.

I let a humorless laugh die on my lips. "That's the thing about writing a best-selling novel about women, men, equality and sex." I got up to get a drink from the fridge so she wouldn't see my eyes water. Stupid pollen. (sniff) Yeah…pollen.

I sat back down when I felt I had collected my self a bit. A warm hand touched mine. I looked up to see Mina signaling me to go on. "Men seem to blame it on you when their sex lives are compromised. No man wants anything to do with Serena Stone, Down with Love girl." I took a big gulp and put the cup on the table. "Oh Sere, it's not that bad. You'll land a man and I can feel it. They don't call me the love goddess for nothing." She winked at me and gave me a tissue to wipe my eyes.

"If only I can find a man who hasn't heard of me or my book." Good luck. I'd hate to brag but everyone has heard of my book! Mina gave me a sympathetic look. "You would need a man who's been off the earth the past 2 months." Mina chuckled. I agreed. The changes of meeting a man like that where 1 in 6 trillion. I hadn't had sex in 2 years, 4 months, and 23 days. But who was counting. (Sere/Mina/Lita/Raye/Amy=22yr Dare/Andy/Greg/Chad=25 srry I forgot to mention this.)

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Thank god I don't do my own laundry. I might have flooded my whole place. A while ago Mina told me of a laundry place where I could get me laundry done in record time. I've been going there ever since. Greg and Chad worked there part time. I had met Amy there when picking up laundry. Amy was a genius and she had just started Down with Love. She wanted to be a doctor more than anything else and had worked here to help pay her way through collage.

Now she was a surgeon over at St. Mary's. Chad was working on a music career, but secretly I wouldn't get his hopes up. He's been chasing after Raye for a while now. Poor boy. Greg's dad owned the place before he passed away and now it's his.

Today was no different. I went in to pick up my laundry. I wasn't surprised not to see Chad or Greg seeing as how they only worked part time. The old Petrovsky couple was working today. I was surprised to find Mrs. Petrovsky at the register.

"Hello Serena! Look! I have old Mr. Petrovsky ironing. No more ironing for me. From now on he iron I work register!" she smiled a triumphant smile and asked me to wait while she got my stuff. I love to see my book at work!

------------------------------------------------------- (Dare Pov)

I was standing by the hotdog stand when I saw her in person. Now was my changer. I had offered to pick up Andy's dry cleaning after cracking his desk and since it was on my way. I slip on the glasses and run my hand through my hair a little. Jogging across the street I open the door and step into the laundry place. There she was. And she was all his.

-------------------------------------------------------- (Sere dammit!)

I heard the bell ding as I waited for my clothes. Since Mrs. Petrovsky was MIA Mr. Petrovsky came to the register. I turned around to see the most gorgeous man I had ever seen. Ebony locks, deep blue eyes, tall solid and I mean solid frame, and a dazzling white smile. Please don't let my legs give out. I must be strong. So I pulled a Hershey kiss out of my bag. I could do this!

"Pick up." Aw he was country. He turned to look at me and smiled. Woo boy. Time for another piece of chocolate. "Nice weather we're having right Miss?" He picked up his clothes and turned to me. "Gorgeous." Was that my voice. Warning total system failure warning total system failure warning warning.

"My name is Catcher Block." He picked my hand and kissed the back of it. I thought men had murdered chivalry a long time ago. I demand a retrial! "You probably already now my name." I blushed and wished I could crawl into the sewers and die. "I'm…afraid I don't" he smiled the heart melting smile again. Wait what does he mean he doesn't know who I am? I'm every man's worst nightmare.

"You don't know who I am? Where have you been the past 2 months?" I knew it was rude but I gawked at him anyway. "I worked for NASA I'm an astronaut. In fact, I just came back today from a mission. Now may I know your name Miss?" I think my eyes must have shone like diamonds at this moment. This man had never heard of Down with Love or me. Thank God he was cute!

"My name is Serena. Serena Stone."

"Well, Serena, would you mind showing a country boy around the big city sometime?" he grabbed my stuff and held the door open for me as we left. "I would love to." Did I just gush? I had forgotten the last time a gushed for anyone.  "How about dinner on the town?" I was hoping he would say yes. "Sounds great! Can I have your number to get in touch with-" I had shoved the paper in his hand before he could even get the rest of the sentence out. But I was desperate dammit!

"I will see you later Serena." He walked away and I watched. And watched And watched. Nice. Ass.

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As I walked into LGM I saw a man standing in front of Molly's desk. He didn't look bad from the back. Catcher looked better. Molly looked around the desk and waved me over. The man saw this and turned around obviously to see too. When he did 3 things occurred at once. My nose started bleeding at the sheer horror of looking him in the face. I fainted. Molly would later tell me when he ran to help me he slipped on some water next to a CAUTION: wet surface sign and skid right over me tripped and passed out at seeing my blood so close up. My. Hero.

Why me?

----------------------------------------- (mina yay)

Bored.

The only thing that comes to mind is bored. The guy is hot and we have nothing in common. We can't even talk about how good we both look because we've done that already. Now he is saying every boring thing known to man. How can such a dim bulb know so many useless facts? Who cares if an elephant can jump or not? I want sex dammit! Wild, sweaty, earth shattering, hot monkey sex!

"Look…" I had to look at my hand to find his name. "Jared, It's obvious we're not on the same page so if you could just leave your half of the bill I can end this date from hell." There I had said it.

I.

AM.

WOMAN!

The poor boy looked confused but did as I said and was only his way. Hallelujah!

-------------------------------------------------- (Andy yea!)

Look at her. Over there with that-that MEATHEAD! That's it! As soon as she's alone I'm going to give her a piece of my mind. Here's my chance. I strode over to Mina looking, if I do so say myself, as if I own the joint!

"Mina, I refuse to let you date these men that only want you for your body. It is a disgrace and I demand that you cease and desist!" Yeah. I was on a roll now. Any moment she was going to tell me how right I was and I was the only man for her.

SLAP!

Mina's head was down and by the looks of it I had pissed her off.

"How dare you?" she was shaking with fury. This was not good…"You stupid prick! What I do with my body is none I repeat NONE of your business! How dare you come up to me like you own me and demand something like that? I have half the nerve to slap you again. Do something like that again and I will not be able to control my actions!" She tossed her champaign in my face. Ouch. I would not be deterred.

I held her close to me and whispered in her ear. "Are you as turned on as I am?" I could feel her shiver through my wet shirt. I heard her whispered something under her breath. "What? I didn't hear that?" I leaned down further just as she tilted her head up.

"Your place or mine?"

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Well (fans herself) I think this is as good a place as any to stop. And I think its my longest chapter yet. Do ya think I'm getting betta?

Reviewer make the world go round!

Thanx

serena79- Here's the chapter you asked for! Come bak soon! Thnx for the review

bootyBitch- Love the name. lol. Good to see ya girl. Holla

MoonGirl5657- Thank you I am trying to make them a little better. If it weren't for some of my fave authors I would have no clue what so ever what I was doing. I love apple pie. Ur review made me smile. Im glad you think this is betta than the movie. This story is my baby! Come back soon. Luv ya!

Archangel Rhapsody- thnx hope you enjoy this chappie. And come bak soon. Luv da name!

Bradybunch4529- I glad you like the revenge. I got the idea from SnowShadowUser's Story Get a Life. I loved writing the revenge. I hate dto do it to mina tho….I needed darien to think sere was ugly or old like in the movie. The reaction was fun to write. Come bak soon plz!

Rose aka Shinimegami (they do need to stop denying it) - lol I get a big kick out of your review. It gets a laugh out of me every time. Here's ur update. Wait! Don't kill the men. Store them in torture chambers. We need them for reproduction. SAVE THE SPERM! Come bak soon! Enjoy!

Forever Tranquility- Thanx.  He had a bigger part in this chappie. Afraid his ego just got bigger tho. Lol srry.  Come bak soon

Thank you guys so much!

Next time on DWL: Mina got her world rocked! Now what? Serena gets to kno catcher! Melvin is still passed out so no action there. Bad news….I'm still single! Lol keep all hands and feet inside the ride for the next shocking thriller of

DoWn WiTh LoVe!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Holla at ur girl! KaK