Author's Note: WOW! Finally! Here it is.. The next chapter... Even I am
amazed. It's extra long so you'll all forgive me. Anyway, for those of you
who have forgotten what is going on, here are some trigger words to make
you remember: Big storm.. Fight with Wilona.. Common Room with
Marauder's... Lily tells James off.. James goes outside/gets sick.. Dark
side makes an appearance/people die.. James rethinks things... Lily=?
drumroll
Chapter 28
Classes resumed on Monday as usual, and Lily Evans found herself chewing on a crunchy piece of toast covered with a thin layer of creamy butter as she stared into the empty space across from her. She almost wanted the space to be filled up; it was taunting her, that little spot of stifling air, dancing it's little 'I'm a blank spot of air' dance. Lily would've hexed it, if it weren't just... air. She probably would've ended up hitting Severus Snape a couple tables down right across from her, which wouldn't have entirely been a bad thing, she figured. She took a sip of her pumpkin juice without moving her heavy lidded eyes from that spot.
"My, my... I think the Mudblood has a crush..." a silky voice drawled suddenly, causing her to knock her goblet into her lap, its sticky contents creating a large, dark pool on her robes. Lily gritted her teeth and looked up, taking a deep breath through her nose. She knew the voice, the drawl, and she did not want to deal with that this morning.
"What are you talking about, Black?" she said coolly, meeting the other girl's gaze evenly, taking in the haughty smirk, the dark eyes, the long black hair.
"I'm talking about who you've been staring the whole time you've been down here," Bellatrix Black replied coldly, managing to keep the smirk on her face at the same time. She stood before Lily with her arms crossed on her chest, her deep green robes hanging loosely around her tall figure. A quick glance behind the girl showed Lily that most of the Slytherin table was watching Bellatrix with faint interest. Several looked like they were desperately hoping for Black-Evans spar to break out.
Typical Slytherins, Lily thought with disgust. It's like they've never heard of magic.
As if she had heard what Lily was thinking, the dark haired girl shot her an especially hateful glare and Lily noticed that there were two other people behind her, both burly looking boys. Bellatrix's boyfriend, as well as his brother.
"Well?" Bellatrix asked contemptuously, lifting her head up to look further down at Lily, who was seated on a bench below her anyway.
"Well what? I've no clue what you're talking about," Lily answered angrily, the words spilling out of her mouth before she could really control herself. She stood up, flicking her hair out of her face and then tightening her fists by her side, her right hand delving into her pocket to hold onto her wand. Just incase, Lily thought sternly.
Bellatrix saw Lily grip her wand in her pocket and relished the fact that the Mudblood was scared.
"I think you do," she said, still smirking. "Let's see where you were staring, Miss Evans." She leaned over, robes fluttering around her, and stared in the direction Lily had been staring a few moments ago. Only instead of staring at that infernal blank space, she stared straight at Severus Snape, who was currently glowering at them from where he was sitting. Bellatrix grinned.
Lily tightened her hold on her wand, bristling at what the other girl was suggesting. She felt a blush creeping onto her cheeks, one that was not from embarrassment, and she cast a loathsome glance at the tall girl on the other side of her table.
Half the eyes in the Great Hall were now cast upon them, watching wearily or in anticipation, depending on what House one was in. The air prickled softly, tauntingly still, and Lily was wary of the anxious feelings she had been experiencing lately. The end of the raging storm had not ceased her worries, as the arrival of the Daily Prophet yesterday morning had made it worse. Sure, she had gotten answers to some of her questions, but she still felt the same. She bit her lip, remembering.
"Scared, Evans?" Bellatrix taunted arrogantly before leaning down, lowering her voice and saying, "You should be. We don't like Mudbloods like you."
Lily's eyes widened and she pulled her wand out of her pocket before she could stop herself. Bellatrix backed up in surprise and the two boys behind her fumbled about for their wands. She could feel the residents of the Gryffindor table shudder in surprise and indignation and a wave of whispers spread throughout the Great Hall like wildfire.
"What is going on here?" A shrill voice pierced through the murmuring and Professor McGonagall appeared suddenly at Lily's side, looking furious.
"Miss Evans!"
Lily stared at Bellatrix's cold, hard eyes for another second and then turned to face her Transfigurations teacher.
"Nothing, Professor."
"Nothing?" The professor paused, frowning, and cast a calculating eye on the scene. "Very well then. Ten points from Gryffindor and Slytherin for having wands out during Breakfast and disturbing our meal. Miss Black, back to your table." She nodded and walked away briskly.
Bellatrix waited a second and then muttered, "Mudblood," before sneering and flipping her hair back as she walked towards her table.
"Better watch out, little teacher's pet," Radolphus Lestrange growled menacingly before he and his brother headed after his girlfriend.
Lily exhaled the breath that she didn't realize she had been holding and then sat down. She smiled tentatively at the Gryffindors around her and desperately wished Alice would haul herself out of bed and come to breakfast. She vaguely wondered where James was... She had half-expected him to perform some heroic rescue.
"Wow, Lily, McGonagall just yelled at you," Mark Thomas commented thoughtfully.
"I noticed," Lily answered, her face blushing out of embarrassment this time. She picked up her fork and poked at the cold, yellow eggs on her plate. She hoped that McGonagall wouldn't think different of her now, as she had never really done anything wrong before. That Bellatrix girl had been pushing her over the edge lately. Taunting her in the hallways between classes, during Potions... now at breakfast. It was all too weird, but Lily was used to it now. She knew what it was like to be a Mugglebord. A Mudblood.
And she was damn proud of it.
Monday morning found James Potter uneager to resume his usual weekly activities, as he was dreading the moment when he would have to see that insufferable redhead once again. Insufferable, he kept telling himself. Cruel and coldhearted, he repeated. Absolutely annoying. Unpredictable. Quick-tempered. Feisty. Cunning, perhaps. And dreadfully intelligent. Not to mention that hair, those eyes...
"James," he said aloud to no one in particular as he buttoned his shirt, "You. Are. Whipped."
"Hear, hear," the large mirror near his dresser quipped loudly in response.
James grumbled and then foraged through his drawers for his necktie, or any one of his backups, but the search was proving to be completely pointless, not to mention absolutely aggravating. Madam Pomfrey had released him from her clutches earlier that morning, after feeding (...forcing was more like it, he thought) him a big breakfast and making him promise to check in with her later that evening. Now, he found himself in his room in a worse temper than before, struggling to get ready for classes and almost wishing that he would have just stayed in the hospital wing. He hurriedly tossed aside a few wrinkled shirts and pairs of boxers from his top drawer and began to mutter swears under his breath as he moved down to the next drawer.
A few scattered articles of clothing later, he sat back on his knees and scowled at his dresser. Sirius probably took them all, he thought in irritation. That bastard. He was probably stuffing his face that very moment, getting jelly and crumbs all over James's tie.
James stood up and let out a resigned sigh, pressing his hands to the sides of his head and then ruffling his hair nervously. He'd just have to go without it. Hopefully no one would notice. Taking a quick glance at the clock by his bed, he figured that if he dawdled about a little longer, then everyone would definitely notice if he walked into class late. Especially with advanced potions being the first class of the day. He groaned, dreading absolutely everything about this day except for dinner.
And Merlin, wasn't there a Prefect meeting scheduled for that night?
"Wonderful," he said to the mirror, who did not reply this time. He grabbed his book bag and was just about ready to leave. Now where was his cloak? He took a step forward towards his closet but then stumbled when he realized that his cloak was currently not in his possession. In fact, it was in the possession of the one person who he did not want to see most that day. And that person was not Severus Snape. Although, he sort of liked seeing Snape...
Oh bloody hell, he thought miserably.
He grabbed a thinner cloak out of his closet and shrugged into it easily, snatched his book bag off the floor once again, and then set off towards his first class. His eyes made full sweeps of the hallway as he sought out Remus or Sirius or more likely both so that he would be accompanied when he walked into the classroom, so as to avoid any awkward moments. There had only been a few times that he had ever walked into class alone, for various reasons, and he had not enjoyed the ensuing experience. The feeling of sitting alone at a desk in a partially filled classroom while his class and housemates glanced at him inquiringly was... simply put, awkward. He always felt naked without Sirius, Remus or Peter next to him. Did people notice? Perhaps I should re-assess my relationship with these fellows, he thought halfheartedly as he jostled past a group of third years hovering by a staircase.
The hallways were unusually crowded that morning. Students packed themselves into the main corridors around the Hogwarts castle and avoided taking lesser known side routes as a result of the impending threat from the Dark side, it seemed. It was almost silly, James thought. Hogwarts was invincible. Dumbledore was invincible. Good was invincible.
Good always triumphed in the end. That's just the way it was supposed to be, he figured.
As he made his was forward through the crowd, he scanned the tops of people's head for anyone with disheveled, almost black hair. Sirius was the tallest of the Marauders, so it was natural to always look for him first. For a second, James thought he spied his best friend up ahead, but the person soon turned and broke off into one of the less-crowded, side corridors, and when James hurried closer he noticed that this figure looked nothing like Sirius at all. THIS particular person had hair that was incredibly shiny, but not Katherine Etheridge type of shiny... more like Severus Snape type of shiny. Curiosity piqued, James jogged forward into the hallway, slipping behind a statue by the wall as the figure's footsteps began to slow down. A minute later, the figure turned and glanced over his shoulder uneasily.
And there it was, the key feature in identifying the figure:
The Hooked Nose.
James narrowed his eyes at Severus Snape's retreating back, curiosity and suspicion pumping through the blood in his veins. He vaguely remembered that he had a Potions class to get to, but the idea that Snape was skipping out on Potions was too much for him to just leave alone. Plus, he was a tricky, greasy git with no good up his pants.
Therefore, he deserved to be followed.
Seven minutes of intense stalking later, James Potter found himself in front of Headmaster Dumbledore's office, biting his bottom lip and staring intently at the gargoyle entrance in which Snape had just disappeared into.
Realizing that there was no point in standing there, as Snape would not be coming out anytime soon it seemed, James decided to head to his class. He walked through the halls in trepidation, dreading the moment he had to walk into that room, ten minutes late. The Potions Master did not pity the tardy, he discovered a long time ago.
Soon enough, stood in front of his Potions classroom, biting on his lip again and dreading the inevitable. So much for avoiding awkward moments. He still had no idea what Dumbledore would want with Snape, and he resigned himself to the fact that he would probably never find out. The sneaky git. And now he would get in trouble for it.
Now or never, he thought dimly.
He took a deep breath and tightened his grip on the cold, unforgiving door knob before slowly turning it to the right. Through the window of the door, he saw the professor freeze in mid-gesture, sliding his hawk-like eyes towards the direction of the door. James decided that this would be a good a time as any to enter the classroom, and he pushed the door inward slowly, wincing at the painfully loud screech emitted from the hinges.
"Mister Potter," the cool, silky voice greeted him as he slipped into the room as silently as possible. No sudden movements, he thought precariously.
"Er. Mister Lange, sir," he answered before he gulped. He was aware that every eye in the classroom was fixated on him, on his face, their owners probably waiting for him to crack a joke or ease the tension somehow. Taking care not to make eye contact with anyone, he cast through his brain unenthusiastically for something to say, drawing a blank. The potions master cleared his throat warningly and James quickly mumbled an uncharacteristic "I'm sorry" before attempting to slink casually to his seat. He managed to make it to his chair, which was next to Frank Longbottom, although his attempt was not casual in the least, with every neck in the room craned in his direction and watching his every move, his every shuffle and trip and bump. Ignoring the professor's declaration that twenty points had just been taken from Gryffindor, James slid down into his seat and sighed inaudibly, desperately wishing again that he was still in the Hospital wing.
In front of him, Remus and Sirius turned around and wiggled their eyebrows at him questioningly. Sirius mouthed "what happened?" but James only shrugged dismissively in response, his shoulders aching with the slightest movement. He fought the urge to yawn and wondered how he could possibly be tired when he had just slept for the past twenty or so hours of his life.
"Lupin. Black. Turn around. Five points." The professor quickly scolded, not missing a beat with his lesson, to the relief of James for once. He did not particularly want to deal with his friends that very second, knowing they would later pump him for information until he practically vomited up his breakfast just so they could see what he had eaten.
Rolling his eyes at the thought, he pulled out his textbook and parchment and pretended to listen to Professor Lange drone on about the dangers of experimenting with little know potion ingredients, such as dragon teardrops. At the moment, he couldn't care less about dragon teardrops. Honestly, the things they teach now, he thought tiredly.
Slowly, his eyes began to stray around the room, occasionally flicking back towards the professor so as not to be caught. Severus Snape was absent of course; his chair lay empty next to Evan Rosier's, who had apparently just noticed James was staring at him, or near him, at least. He grinned crookedly and made a crude gesture with his hand, one that James had seen many a time before. Behind him, Radolfus Lestrange let out a dark chuckle and Bellatrix Black, Sirius's seriously evil cousin, hissed menacingly, "What's the matter, Potty? Looking for your boyfriend?" Lestrange sniggered at James and shot an approving look at his girlfriend.
"You've got some competition, you know..." the dark-haired witch continued, eliciting a quiet gasp from behind him and making him sputter wordlessly in surprise and confusion until the professor calmly admonished Black without so much as a harsh word. James quickly picked up his quill and scribbled a few non-legible notes from the top of his head to make it look like he was actually paying attention. He soon snuck a glance at Black and Lestrange, who were sitting in their chairs almost serenely, hands poised above parchment so as to write down ever word their beloved Head of House uttered. A couple seconds later, Bellatrix flicked her eyes at James and sneered, Radolfus faithfully following suit.
There was nothing else for James to do but turn his head forward, place his cheek in his left palm with his arm propped up on his desk, and pretend to listen to the professor. His eyelids fluttered down blissfully ever so often, eyes welcoming the smooth blackness that resulted until he realized that he was still in class. Once in a while, his elbow would slip off the table and only through sheer experience was he able to upright himself without smashing his chin into the very hard desk below him. He ignored the worried looks of Remus and Sirius, who turned around every so often to check up on him like the good friends they were.
But it wasn't until Sirius raised his eyebrows suggestively and licked his lips did James remember that he was sitting in the same classroom as Lily Evans. Merlin! he thought, and sat upright in his seat out of pure dread. Cautiously, he slid his eyes around the room, searching for the brilliant shock of red hair or the icy glare of emerald eyes to greet him.
He saw neither.
Furrowing his eyebrows, he noticed that there were no empty seats except for Snape's, and the only seats that he couldn't see were... behind him, he realized in horror. No, she couldn't be... not right behind him... staring at the back of his head this whole time. His eyes widened at the prospect of her having seen him nod off and catch himself from falling into the table. But surely she hadn't watched him that closely? Why would she? Questions and worries raced through James's mind furiously, and his heart began to speed up. The back of his neck was getting perilously hot; he hoped it wasn't turning red. He hoped she wouldn't notice. He hoped that maybe she wasn't really sitting behind him; maybe she was right up front where he couldn't see her. That made a lot more sense, he reckoned. She and Alice always sat in front.
James shifted in his seat to the left and peered up at the front desk, where his eyes fell upon a long wisp of light blond hair. No, that was definitely not Lily Evans, he stated inwardly to himself. She was behind him. There was no denying it. Why was he so jittery about it? He had to calm down; she would certainly notice if he started to move around jerkily all of a sudden. No sudden movements, he told himself for the second time today.
So for the rest of that period he sat stiffly, upright, left arm resting on the desk, right arm clutching a quill and trying to take notes. By the time the lab period came around, his body was sore and his arms and legs tingled with the pins and needles feeling as they tried to wake up. James stood up and staggered forward into Remus, who gave him an odd look as he pushed James back into vertical position.
"You alright, James?" he asked quietly, his light brown eyes filled with concern as he clamped a hand on Sirius's mouth to prevent him from speaking.
"Yeah. I'm fine. Tired is all," James answered and then checked his list to see who he was paired up with today. Ah, Frank Longbottom, he read with relief before he shoved his textbook into his bag to make room for materials. He wouldn't have been able to deal with Lestrange or Sirius's cousin today.
"We'll talk later." He waved his hand dismissively to a still-worried Remus and slightly angry Sirius before he looked towards Frank, who had apparently turned around to have a chat with his girlfriend, Alice. Alice was of course sitting next to Lily, but James hadn't quite turned all the way around to look at her yet. Not that he was planning to any time soon. At the sight of Alice, he quickly averted his eyes to Frank's open textbook and began flipping through the pages for the potion that they were supposed to make. She had really turned the tides with this one; he had always been the one somewhere behind her, staring at the back of her head. It was quite unsettling for James. He reached a hand up to ruffle his hair self- consciously.
Seeing that his partner had already begun to work on their Potion, Frank quickly turned back and apologized for the delay, launching into that classic work-mode that James loved. "I'll do ingredients, you do the potion," the boy stated crisply and went to the back of the room to gather the ingredients that they did not already own.
James shook his head and grinned at his retreating back, not realizing until it was too late that he had almost completely turned around and that Lily Evans was directly in front of him. He unconsciously lowered his gaze right onto a pair of hazy, green eyes that were staring at him with... yes, that was definitely suspicion. His eyes widened when he saw her right eyebrow tilt upwards ever so slightly, questioningly, her face as unreadable. Usually her eyes gave her away; it was something he had always counted on. But he just couldn't tell anymore. They were too cloudy and too dark; he couldn't even see his reflection in them this time.
Her hair was still the same though. Still that magnificent red color, not orange as a carrot and almost auburn-ish at times, although it depended entirely on the season, he had noticed a long time ago. Winter made it darker, summer made it lighter, and the sun always made it different. So her hair was always the same because it was always different, although that makes no sense at all he thought dazedly while he stared at her face.
His throat had gone dry a couple of seconds ago, he had felt it, and he desperately swallowed in an attempt to lubricate his unfortunate esophagus. Lily's eyebrow rose a little bit higher at the sight of his bobbing Adam's apple, and he thought he saw the corner of her lip curve upwards just the tiniest bit.
"Er. Hello there," he said finally, his voice sounding better than he had feared it would. She blinked at him for a second, dropping her eyebrow, to his disappointment. He had liked the eyebrow effect.
"Hello," she said lightly, her own voice was marvelously cool and soft, matching her misty eyes in an inexplicable way. He also liked it when her voice was like this, not like when she was shrieking at something at the top of her lungs, which he had heard often enough, either towards him or at something else. Usually towards him.
He smiled and said conventionally, "How are you?"
He watched her continue to look at him suspiciously, and he fought the urge to point out how nice he was being, how normally he was treating her, how much he wanted her to just like him...
"Well, what do we have here?" Bellatrix Black's shrill voice interrupted them and James looked up to see her standing there, arms crossed, grinning snootily under nose. "It's Potty talking to his little girlfriend." She made a face of mock-horror. "But wait a minute? What about your boyfriend, Potty? And..."She glanced at Lily and then clapped a hand dramatically over her heart. "Oh my goodness! Look at this love triangle!"
Ignoring Radolfus Lestrange's loud sniggering, James snuck a look at Lily and saw that her jaw was clenched and her hand was wrapped around her quill so tightly that it looked like it was about to snap. It was odd seeing her angry at someone else for a change. It was almost sort of nice, he thought vaguely.
"What... are you talking about, Black?" she asked quietly, not moving from her seat although the other witch was looming above her. James opted not to speak for a second, mostly because he was still too confused by what the girl had said.
"Oh, come on, Evans. Don't you know?" she taunted and flipped her hair back, happily in her element.
"Know what?" James demanded, keeping his voice as low as Lily's had been. He didn't particularly want to get in trouble today, although if this continued, he probably would.
Bellatrix laughed a sharp barking laugh and said, "Your little girlfriend," she nodded towards a glaring Lily, "has a crush on Severus Snape."
James mouth dropped open in shock.
"I do not!" Lily hissed furiously and instantaneously, lifting her hand to pound it on the desk but catching herself before impact. Her green eyes came to life, violent sparks were visible in her irises and her anger was impossible to miss. Face flushing, she gritted her teeth and said "You're sick" to Bellatrix, who had delighted in Lily's anger.
The girl would not stop. "What? Potter likes him, too," she declared, lifting her head up to look further down at them through her nose. By this time, Frank had returned and was watching the scene, waiting for something serious to happen before he stepped in. Most of the class had not noticed what was going on, as even Bellatrix was taking care to keep her voice low, and thankfully the Professor was on the other side of the room, chastising another student.
"What? You're crazy," James affirmed, turning to Lily who was nodding in agreement. He was convinced that Bellatrix was just trying to annoy them. He certainly did not like Severus Snape, and there was no way Lily could either. That type of thing just wasn't allowed, he told himself.
"Sure, stick by your boyfriend," Bellatrix sneered at Lily, putting her hands on her hips and glancing at her Radolfus.
James was about to retort when Lily surprised them all by boredly saying, "Don't you have anything better to do?" and scoffing loudly before standing up. She made to join Alice at the back of the classroom, and just before she took a step forward she turned her head back at the open-mouthed Bellatrix to say cooly, "And he's not my boyfriend."
The she was gone.
James stared at her retreating back in utter amazement, jaw unhinged. A second later, Bellatrix sniffed and walked away, Radolfus following her like the puppy dog that he was, and Frank sat down in his chair beside James and brought the boy back down to earth.
"You're whipped, mate," he said neutrally while arranging the ingredients in front of him.
"Thanks, Frank," James sighed in resignation and then flicked his wand to light up their cauldron, the dark orange flames tantalizing him with their every flicker.
Potions class had not ended quickly enough, Lily thought as she chewed her dinner methodically while Alice tried to engage her in conversation. It had been such an embarrassing and awkward experience- curse Black for it- and she took extra care to avoid all Slytherins for the entire day. She usually did anyway, but now she actually had reason to. Risking a glance over at their table, she saw them, all of them, sitting and sneering at eachother, undoubtedly making crude jokes and laughing heartily at them. And there sat Bellatrix, the queen of them all.
She shook her head at their stupidity and focused back in on Alice, who had just broached a topic which she was reluctant to speak about.
"Frank told me about what happened in Potions."
Lily groaned. "I don't want to talk about that." She speared a lima bean off her plate and stuffed it in her mouth.
"Okay. But remember. He genuinely likes you," Alice said, raising her eyebrows at Lily. "They didn't seem to be lying about that." Lily knew she was right.
"And why does he annoy her so much? Can't he just leave her alone?" Alice asked.
"No, he can't. He doesn't mean to annoy her. He's just... a bit thick. He doesn't know what to do," Remus implored, his eyes wide and painfully desperate.
Even Sirius sat quietly, not eating, his face blank as a piece of clean parchment.
"Ugh. I just don't know what to do. I don't like him that way," Lily finally said as Alice watched her patiently.
"Well. Can you be friends with him at least?"
"But he's a prat, Alice! How can I?" she said helplessly, putting her fork down on the side of her plate. She sighed and then looked down the Gryffindor table, where she spotted all four of them, heads bent towards the middle of the table, whispering to each other. Planning. Plotting. She could tell.
His hair was messy as always, but it did not do anything to hinder his appearance. In a way, it complemented him, she decided. His messy hair, his flamboyant personality... they were different than that of Sirius's. Sirius was born to be that way. James had made himself that way. So it seemed now. He was different. Wasn't he?
Lily blinked, realizing what she had been thinking. She brought her gaze back to Alice, who was smiling at her knowingly and chewing on her biscuit.
"Don't look at me like that," Lily said tersely.
"Okay," Alice replied cheerfully, her face assuming a similar, more innocent expression.
"I hate you," Lily stated blandly.
The brunette chirped in response, "No, you don't,"
"You're right. I don't."
"I'm always right."
"Shut up," Lily said, giggling her seriousness away.
Half an hour later, she sat in a stiff backed chair in the Prefect meeting room, her head propped up on her hand while she attempted to poke her eye out with her sugarquill. She really had nothing better to. A fifth-year Ravenclaw prefect was droning on and on about tighter bathroom control, as they were becoming less of laboratories and more of hang-out spots, and she honestly had stopped listening the second he started, preferring to poke her eye out with her quill. She stifled a yawn and lifted her head slightly to relief the stress that her hand was going through in propping up her head, although that position only made her neck hurt. She sighed loudly, a little too loudly probably, and glanced over at James, who was sitting right next to her at the table, both of them being Head Girl and Head Boy and all.
She was reassured to see that he was in a similar state of being, although he looked much closer to falling asleep. He seemed to sense that she was looking at him, for at that moment he looked up and met her gaze, surprised for a second. Then he rolled his eyes and mouthed "kill me now." She smiled, almost shyly, and nodded her head in agreement before looking away, not knowing what else to do. She stared forward and listened to him make odd rustling noises beside her for a while, and then she heard a low scraping sound that sounded like a quill on parchment.
A second later, a scrap of parchment was pushed across the table into her view, and she placed a hand on it and drew it closer to her, slightly nervous. He hadn't bothered to fold it or anything, there wasn't any need to, and she began reading the words on the paper.
So, how is life?
She dipped her head forward and squinted her eyes at the question in amazement. So, how is life? What sort of question was that? She puzzled over how to answer. Finally, she decided on:
Life is alright. And yours?
She slid the paper back towards him, and so it continued.
That's good. Mine is okay. Could be better.
Yes. That's usually how it is.
True. And... how is school?
Hah. It's the usual.
Usual?
You know. Potions is dreary. Charms is fun. Same people, same places. The usual.
Same people, same places? Does that bother you?
Only sometimes... certain people and certain places.
Ah. I see. I know what you mean.
Do you? Perhaps. Though you never seem to run out of things to do though.
Trust me I do.
You have good friends.
Yes. I'm lucky. You have good friends, too.
Well. I thought I did. I have some good friends though, yes.
So that's good.
Magic never ceases to amaze me. You know. I can never get enough of it.
Same here. Its sort of different for you though, I guess.
Yeah...
Er... so what are you doing after Hogwarts?
I'm not positive yet. Looking into Auror training, as you know. Maybe the Ministry even.
You'd make a great Auror. Don't work for the Ministry. That's boring.
Well. Maybe I like boring...
But boring is for people like Severus Snape. He's a greasy git. You're not even close.
Don't get me started, James.
Okay. I'm trying. I've been trying, Lily. I'm sorry. I don't know what to do. It's so hard. Ah, listen to me babble in a note. Do you want me to stop? Now, that is.
No.
Okay.. Can't we be friends, Lily? Can't we just try? Do you hate me that much? I'll be nice to you. Just talk to me. Please?
James watched as Lily stared at the paper, her hair falling over her face and obscuring her features from view. She stared at it for such a long time that James thought he had made a mistake. He wanted to melt away from view. But finally, she lifted her trembling hand and scratched something on the ink-stained parchment before pushing it ever so slowly back towards him, not meeting his eyes the whole time.
He looked down.
I'll try.
drumroll
Chapter 28
Classes resumed on Monday as usual, and Lily Evans found herself chewing on a crunchy piece of toast covered with a thin layer of creamy butter as she stared into the empty space across from her. She almost wanted the space to be filled up; it was taunting her, that little spot of stifling air, dancing it's little 'I'm a blank spot of air' dance. Lily would've hexed it, if it weren't just... air. She probably would've ended up hitting Severus Snape a couple tables down right across from her, which wouldn't have entirely been a bad thing, she figured. She took a sip of her pumpkin juice without moving her heavy lidded eyes from that spot.
"My, my... I think the Mudblood has a crush..." a silky voice drawled suddenly, causing her to knock her goblet into her lap, its sticky contents creating a large, dark pool on her robes. Lily gritted her teeth and looked up, taking a deep breath through her nose. She knew the voice, the drawl, and she did not want to deal with that this morning.
"What are you talking about, Black?" she said coolly, meeting the other girl's gaze evenly, taking in the haughty smirk, the dark eyes, the long black hair.
"I'm talking about who you've been staring the whole time you've been down here," Bellatrix Black replied coldly, managing to keep the smirk on her face at the same time. She stood before Lily with her arms crossed on her chest, her deep green robes hanging loosely around her tall figure. A quick glance behind the girl showed Lily that most of the Slytherin table was watching Bellatrix with faint interest. Several looked like they were desperately hoping for Black-Evans spar to break out.
Typical Slytherins, Lily thought with disgust. It's like they've never heard of magic.
As if she had heard what Lily was thinking, the dark haired girl shot her an especially hateful glare and Lily noticed that there were two other people behind her, both burly looking boys. Bellatrix's boyfriend, as well as his brother.
"Well?" Bellatrix asked contemptuously, lifting her head up to look further down at Lily, who was seated on a bench below her anyway.
"Well what? I've no clue what you're talking about," Lily answered angrily, the words spilling out of her mouth before she could really control herself. She stood up, flicking her hair out of her face and then tightening her fists by her side, her right hand delving into her pocket to hold onto her wand. Just incase, Lily thought sternly.
Bellatrix saw Lily grip her wand in her pocket and relished the fact that the Mudblood was scared.
"I think you do," she said, still smirking. "Let's see where you were staring, Miss Evans." She leaned over, robes fluttering around her, and stared in the direction Lily had been staring a few moments ago. Only instead of staring at that infernal blank space, she stared straight at Severus Snape, who was currently glowering at them from where he was sitting. Bellatrix grinned.
Lily tightened her hold on her wand, bristling at what the other girl was suggesting. She felt a blush creeping onto her cheeks, one that was not from embarrassment, and she cast a loathsome glance at the tall girl on the other side of her table.
Half the eyes in the Great Hall were now cast upon them, watching wearily or in anticipation, depending on what House one was in. The air prickled softly, tauntingly still, and Lily was wary of the anxious feelings she had been experiencing lately. The end of the raging storm had not ceased her worries, as the arrival of the Daily Prophet yesterday morning had made it worse. Sure, she had gotten answers to some of her questions, but she still felt the same. She bit her lip, remembering.
"Scared, Evans?" Bellatrix taunted arrogantly before leaning down, lowering her voice and saying, "You should be. We don't like Mudbloods like you."
Lily's eyes widened and she pulled her wand out of her pocket before she could stop herself. Bellatrix backed up in surprise and the two boys behind her fumbled about for their wands. She could feel the residents of the Gryffindor table shudder in surprise and indignation and a wave of whispers spread throughout the Great Hall like wildfire.
"What is going on here?" A shrill voice pierced through the murmuring and Professor McGonagall appeared suddenly at Lily's side, looking furious.
"Miss Evans!"
Lily stared at Bellatrix's cold, hard eyes for another second and then turned to face her Transfigurations teacher.
"Nothing, Professor."
"Nothing?" The professor paused, frowning, and cast a calculating eye on the scene. "Very well then. Ten points from Gryffindor and Slytherin for having wands out during Breakfast and disturbing our meal. Miss Black, back to your table." She nodded and walked away briskly.
Bellatrix waited a second and then muttered, "Mudblood," before sneering and flipping her hair back as she walked towards her table.
"Better watch out, little teacher's pet," Radolphus Lestrange growled menacingly before he and his brother headed after his girlfriend.
Lily exhaled the breath that she didn't realize she had been holding and then sat down. She smiled tentatively at the Gryffindors around her and desperately wished Alice would haul herself out of bed and come to breakfast. She vaguely wondered where James was... She had half-expected him to perform some heroic rescue.
"Wow, Lily, McGonagall just yelled at you," Mark Thomas commented thoughtfully.
"I noticed," Lily answered, her face blushing out of embarrassment this time. She picked up her fork and poked at the cold, yellow eggs on her plate. She hoped that McGonagall wouldn't think different of her now, as she had never really done anything wrong before. That Bellatrix girl had been pushing her over the edge lately. Taunting her in the hallways between classes, during Potions... now at breakfast. It was all too weird, but Lily was used to it now. She knew what it was like to be a Mugglebord. A Mudblood.
And she was damn proud of it.
Monday morning found James Potter uneager to resume his usual weekly activities, as he was dreading the moment when he would have to see that insufferable redhead once again. Insufferable, he kept telling himself. Cruel and coldhearted, he repeated. Absolutely annoying. Unpredictable. Quick-tempered. Feisty. Cunning, perhaps. And dreadfully intelligent. Not to mention that hair, those eyes...
"James," he said aloud to no one in particular as he buttoned his shirt, "You. Are. Whipped."
"Hear, hear," the large mirror near his dresser quipped loudly in response.
James grumbled and then foraged through his drawers for his necktie, or any one of his backups, but the search was proving to be completely pointless, not to mention absolutely aggravating. Madam Pomfrey had released him from her clutches earlier that morning, after feeding (...forcing was more like it, he thought) him a big breakfast and making him promise to check in with her later that evening. Now, he found himself in his room in a worse temper than before, struggling to get ready for classes and almost wishing that he would have just stayed in the hospital wing. He hurriedly tossed aside a few wrinkled shirts and pairs of boxers from his top drawer and began to mutter swears under his breath as he moved down to the next drawer.
A few scattered articles of clothing later, he sat back on his knees and scowled at his dresser. Sirius probably took them all, he thought in irritation. That bastard. He was probably stuffing his face that very moment, getting jelly and crumbs all over James's tie.
James stood up and let out a resigned sigh, pressing his hands to the sides of his head and then ruffling his hair nervously. He'd just have to go without it. Hopefully no one would notice. Taking a quick glance at the clock by his bed, he figured that if he dawdled about a little longer, then everyone would definitely notice if he walked into class late. Especially with advanced potions being the first class of the day. He groaned, dreading absolutely everything about this day except for dinner.
And Merlin, wasn't there a Prefect meeting scheduled for that night?
"Wonderful," he said to the mirror, who did not reply this time. He grabbed his book bag and was just about ready to leave. Now where was his cloak? He took a step forward towards his closet but then stumbled when he realized that his cloak was currently not in his possession. In fact, it was in the possession of the one person who he did not want to see most that day. And that person was not Severus Snape. Although, he sort of liked seeing Snape...
Oh bloody hell, he thought miserably.
He grabbed a thinner cloak out of his closet and shrugged into it easily, snatched his book bag off the floor once again, and then set off towards his first class. His eyes made full sweeps of the hallway as he sought out Remus or Sirius or more likely both so that he would be accompanied when he walked into the classroom, so as to avoid any awkward moments. There had only been a few times that he had ever walked into class alone, for various reasons, and he had not enjoyed the ensuing experience. The feeling of sitting alone at a desk in a partially filled classroom while his class and housemates glanced at him inquiringly was... simply put, awkward. He always felt naked without Sirius, Remus or Peter next to him. Did people notice? Perhaps I should re-assess my relationship with these fellows, he thought halfheartedly as he jostled past a group of third years hovering by a staircase.
The hallways were unusually crowded that morning. Students packed themselves into the main corridors around the Hogwarts castle and avoided taking lesser known side routes as a result of the impending threat from the Dark side, it seemed. It was almost silly, James thought. Hogwarts was invincible. Dumbledore was invincible. Good was invincible.
Good always triumphed in the end. That's just the way it was supposed to be, he figured.
As he made his was forward through the crowd, he scanned the tops of people's head for anyone with disheveled, almost black hair. Sirius was the tallest of the Marauders, so it was natural to always look for him first. For a second, James thought he spied his best friend up ahead, but the person soon turned and broke off into one of the less-crowded, side corridors, and when James hurried closer he noticed that this figure looked nothing like Sirius at all. THIS particular person had hair that was incredibly shiny, but not Katherine Etheridge type of shiny... more like Severus Snape type of shiny. Curiosity piqued, James jogged forward into the hallway, slipping behind a statue by the wall as the figure's footsteps began to slow down. A minute later, the figure turned and glanced over his shoulder uneasily.
And there it was, the key feature in identifying the figure:
The Hooked Nose.
James narrowed his eyes at Severus Snape's retreating back, curiosity and suspicion pumping through the blood in his veins. He vaguely remembered that he had a Potions class to get to, but the idea that Snape was skipping out on Potions was too much for him to just leave alone. Plus, he was a tricky, greasy git with no good up his pants.
Therefore, he deserved to be followed.
Seven minutes of intense stalking later, James Potter found himself in front of Headmaster Dumbledore's office, biting his bottom lip and staring intently at the gargoyle entrance in which Snape had just disappeared into.
Realizing that there was no point in standing there, as Snape would not be coming out anytime soon it seemed, James decided to head to his class. He walked through the halls in trepidation, dreading the moment he had to walk into that room, ten minutes late. The Potions Master did not pity the tardy, he discovered a long time ago.
Soon enough, stood in front of his Potions classroom, biting on his lip again and dreading the inevitable. So much for avoiding awkward moments. He still had no idea what Dumbledore would want with Snape, and he resigned himself to the fact that he would probably never find out. The sneaky git. And now he would get in trouble for it.
Now or never, he thought dimly.
He took a deep breath and tightened his grip on the cold, unforgiving door knob before slowly turning it to the right. Through the window of the door, he saw the professor freeze in mid-gesture, sliding his hawk-like eyes towards the direction of the door. James decided that this would be a good a time as any to enter the classroom, and he pushed the door inward slowly, wincing at the painfully loud screech emitted from the hinges.
"Mister Potter," the cool, silky voice greeted him as he slipped into the room as silently as possible. No sudden movements, he thought precariously.
"Er. Mister Lange, sir," he answered before he gulped. He was aware that every eye in the classroom was fixated on him, on his face, their owners probably waiting for him to crack a joke or ease the tension somehow. Taking care not to make eye contact with anyone, he cast through his brain unenthusiastically for something to say, drawing a blank. The potions master cleared his throat warningly and James quickly mumbled an uncharacteristic "I'm sorry" before attempting to slink casually to his seat. He managed to make it to his chair, which was next to Frank Longbottom, although his attempt was not casual in the least, with every neck in the room craned in his direction and watching his every move, his every shuffle and trip and bump. Ignoring the professor's declaration that twenty points had just been taken from Gryffindor, James slid down into his seat and sighed inaudibly, desperately wishing again that he was still in the Hospital wing.
In front of him, Remus and Sirius turned around and wiggled their eyebrows at him questioningly. Sirius mouthed "what happened?" but James only shrugged dismissively in response, his shoulders aching with the slightest movement. He fought the urge to yawn and wondered how he could possibly be tired when he had just slept for the past twenty or so hours of his life.
"Lupin. Black. Turn around. Five points." The professor quickly scolded, not missing a beat with his lesson, to the relief of James for once. He did not particularly want to deal with his friends that very second, knowing they would later pump him for information until he practically vomited up his breakfast just so they could see what he had eaten.
Rolling his eyes at the thought, he pulled out his textbook and parchment and pretended to listen to Professor Lange drone on about the dangers of experimenting with little know potion ingredients, such as dragon teardrops. At the moment, he couldn't care less about dragon teardrops. Honestly, the things they teach now, he thought tiredly.
Slowly, his eyes began to stray around the room, occasionally flicking back towards the professor so as not to be caught. Severus Snape was absent of course; his chair lay empty next to Evan Rosier's, who had apparently just noticed James was staring at him, or near him, at least. He grinned crookedly and made a crude gesture with his hand, one that James had seen many a time before. Behind him, Radolfus Lestrange let out a dark chuckle and Bellatrix Black, Sirius's seriously evil cousin, hissed menacingly, "What's the matter, Potty? Looking for your boyfriend?" Lestrange sniggered at James and shot an approving look at his girlfriend.
"You've got some competition, you know..." the dark-haired witch continued, eliciting a quiet gasp from behind him and making him sputter wordlessly in surprise and confusion until the professor calmly admonished Black without so much as a harsh word. James quickly picked up his quill and scribbled a few non-legible notes from the top of his head to make it look like he was actually paying attention. He soon snuck a glance at Black and Lestrange, who were sitting in their chairs almost serenely, hands poised above parchment so as to write down ever word their beloved Head of House uttered. A couple seconds later, Bellatrix flicked her eyes at James and sneered, Radolfus faithfully following suit.
There was nothing else for James to do but turn his head forward, place his cheek in his left palm with his arm propped up on his desk, and pretend to listen to the professor. His eyelids fluttered down blissfully ever so often, eyes welcoming the smooth blackness that resulted until he realized that he was still in class. Once in a while, his elbow would slip off the table and only through sheer experience was he able to upright himself without smashing his chin into the very hard desk below him. He ignored the worried looks of Remus and Sirius, who turned around every so often to check up on him like the good friends they were.
But it wasn't until Sirius raised his eyebrows suggestively and licked his lips did James remember that he was sitting in the same classroom as Lily Evans. Merlin! he thought, and sat upright in his seat out of pure dread. Cautiously, he slid his eyes around the room, searching for the brilliant shock of red hair or the icy glare of emerald eyes to greet him.
He saw neither.
Furrowing his eyebrows, he noticed that there were no empty seats except for Snape's, and the only seats that he couldn't see were... behind him, he realized in horror. No, she couldn't be... not right behind him... staring at the back of his head this whole time. His eyes widened at the prospect of her having seen him nod off and catch himself from falling into the table. But surely she hadn't watched him that closely? Why would she? Questions and worries raced through James's mind furiously, and his heart began to speed up. The back of his neck was getting perilously hot; he hoped it wasn't turning red. He hoped she wouldn't notice. He hoped that maybe she wasn't really sitting behind him; maybe she was right up front where he couldn't see her. That made a lot more sense, he reckoned. She and Alice always sat in front.
James shifted in his seat to the left and peered up at the front desk, where his eyes fell upon a long wisp of light blond hair. No, that was definitely not Lily Evans, he stated inwardly to himself. She was behind him. There was no denying it. Why was he so jittery about it? He had to calm down; she would certainly notice if he started to move around jerkily all of a sudden. No sudden movements, he told himself for the second time today.
So for the rest of that period he sat stiffly, upright, left arm resting on the desk, right arm clutching a quill and trying to take notes. By the time the lab period came around, his body was sore and his arms and legs tingled with the pins and needles feeling as they tried to wake up. James stood up and staggered forward into Remus, who gave him an odd look as he pushed James back into vertical position.
"You alright, James?" he asked quietly, his light brown eyes filled with concern as he clamped a hand on Sirius's mouth to prevent him from speaking.
"Yeah. I'm fine. Tired is all," James answered and then checked his list to see who he was paired up with today. Ah, Frank Longbottom, he read with relief before he shoved his textbook into his bag to make room for materials. He wouldn't have been able to deal with Lestrange or Sirius's cousin today.
"We'll talk later." He waved his hand dismissively to a still-worried Remus and slightly angry Sirius before he looked towards Frank, who had apparently turned around to have a chat with his girlfriend, Alice. Alice was of course sitting next to Lily, but James hadn't quite turned all the way around to look at her yet. Not that he was planning to any time soon. At the sight of Alice, he quickly averted his eyes to Frank's open textbook and began flipping through the pages for the potion that they were supposed to make. She had really turned the tides with this one; he had always been the one somewhere behind her, staring at the back of her head. It was quite unsettling for James. He reached a hand up to ruffle his hair self- consciously.
Seeing that his partner had already begun to work on their Potion, Frank quickly turned back and apologized for the delay, launching into that classic work-mode that James loved. "I'll do ingredients, you do the potion," the boy stated crisply and went to the back of the room to gather the ingredients that they did not already own.
James shook his head and grinned at his retreating back, not realizing until it was too late that he had almost completely turned around and that Lily Evans was directly in front of him. He unconsciously lowered his gaze right onto a pair of hazy, green eyes that were staring at him with... yes, that was definitely suspicion. His eyes widened when he saw her right eyebrow tilt upwards ever so slightly, questioningly, her face as unreadable. Usually her eyes gave her away; it was something he had always counted on. But he just couldn't tell anymore. They were too cloudy and too dark; he couldn't even see his reflection in them this time.
Her hair was still the same though. Still that magnificent red color, not orange as a carrot and almost auburn-ish at times, although it depended entirely on the season, he had noticed a long time ago. Winter made it darker, summer made it lighter, and the sun always made it different. So her hair was always the same because it was always different, although that makes no sense at all he thought dazedly while he stared at her face.
His throat had gone dry a couple of seconds ago, he had felt it, and he desperately swallowed in an attempt to lubricate his unfortunate esophagus. Lily's eyebrow rose a little bit higher at the sight of his bobbing Adam's apple, and he thought he saw the corner of her lip curve upwards just the tiniest bit.
"Er. Hello there," he said finally, his voice sounding better than he had feared it would. She blinked at him for a second, dropping her eyebrow, to his disappointment. He had liked the eyebrow effect.
"Hello," she said lightly, her own voice was marvelously cool and soft, matching her misty eyes in an inexplicable way. He also liked it when her voice was like this, not like when she was shrieking at something at the top of her lungs, which he had heard often enough, either towards him or at something else. Usually towards him.
He smiled and said conventionally, "How are you?"
He watched her continue to look at him suspiciously, and he fought the urge to point out how nice he was being, how normally he was treating her, how much he wanted her to just like him...
"Well, what do we have here?" Bellatrix Black's shrill voice interrupted them and James looked up to see her standing there, arms crossed, grinning snootily under nose. "It's Potty talking to his little girlfriend." She made a face of mock-horror. "But wait a minute? What about your boyfriend, Potty? And..."She glanced at Lily and then clapped a hand dramatically over her heart. "Oh my goodness! Look at this love triangle!"
Ignoring Radolfus Lestrange's loud sniggering, James snuck a look at Lily and saw that her jaw was clenched and her hand was wrapped around her quill so tightly that it looked like it was about to snap. It was odd seeing her angry at someone else for a change. It was almost sort of nice, he thought vaguely.
"What... are you talking about, Black?" she asked quietly, not moving from her seat although the other witch was looming above her. James opted not to speak for a second, mostly because he was still too confused by what the girl had said.
"Oh, come on, Evans. Don't you know?" she taunted and flipped her hair back, happily in her element.
"Know what?" James demanded, keeping his voice as low as Lily's had been. He didn't particularly want to get in trouble today, although if this continued, he probably would.
Bellatrix laughed a sharp barking laugh and said, "Your little girlfriend," she nodded towards a glaring Lily, "has a crush on Severus Snape."
James mouth dropped open in shock.
"I do not!" Lily hissed furiously and instantaneously, lifting her hand to pound it on the desk but catching herself before impact. Her green eyes came to life, violent sparks were visible in her irises and her anger was impossible to miss. Face flushing, she gritted her teeth and said "You're sick" to Bellatrix, who had delighted in Lily's anger.
The girl would not stop. "What? Potter likes him, too," she declared, lifting her head up to look further down at them through her nose. By this time, Frank had returned and was watching the scene, waiting for something serious to happen before he stepped in. Most of the class had not noticed what was going on, as even Bellatrix was taking care to keep her voice low, and thankfully the Professor was on the other side of the room, chastising another student.
"What? You're crazy," James affirmed, turning to Lily who was nodding in agreement. He was convinced that Bellatrix was just trying to annoy them. He certainly did not like Severus Snape, and there was no way Lily could either. That type of thing just wasn't allowed, he told himself.
"Sure, stick by your boyfriend," Bellatrix sneered at Lily, putting her hands on her hips and glancing at her Radolfus.
James was about to retort when Lily surprised them all by boredly saying, "Don't you have anything better to do?" and scoffing loudly before standing up. She made to join Alice at the back of the classroom, and just before she took a step forward she turned her head back at the open-mouthed Bellatrix to say cooly, "And he's not my boyfriend."
The she was gone.
James stared at her retreating back in utter amazement, jaw unhinged. A second later, Bellatrix sniffed and walked away, Radolfus following her like the puppy dog that he was, and Frank sat down in his chair beside James and brought the boy back down to earth.
"You're whipped, mate," he said neutrally while arranging the ingredients in front of him.
"Thanks, Frank," James sighed in resignation and then flicked his wand to light up their cauldron, the dark orange flames tantalizing him with their every flicker.
Potions class had not ended quickly enough, Lily thought as she chewed her dinner methodically while Alice tried to engage her in conversation. It had been such an embarrassing and awkward experience- curse Black for it- and she took extra care to avoid all Slytherins for the entire day. She usually did anyway, but now she actually had reason to. Risking a glance over at their table, she saw them, all of them, sitting and sneering at eachother, undoubtedly making crude jokes and laughing heartily at them. And there sat Bellatrix, the queen of them all.
She shook her head at their stupidity and focused back in on Alice, who had just broached a topic which she was reluctant to speak about.
"Frank told me about what happened in Potions."
Lily groaned. "I don't want to talk about that." She speared a lima bean off her plate and stuffed it in her mouth.
"Okay. But remember. He genuinely likes you," Alice said, raising her eyebrows at Lily. "They didn't seem to be lying about that." Lily knew she was right.
"And why does he annoy her so much? Can't he just leave her alone?" Alice asked.
"No, he can't. He doesn't mean to annoy her. He's just... a bit thick. He doesn't know what to do," Remus implored, his eyes wide and painfully desperate.
Even Sirius sat quietly, not eating, his face blank as a piece of clean parchment.
"Ugh. I just don't know what to do. I don't like him that way," Lily finally said as Alice watched her patiently.
"Well. Can you be friends with him at least?"
"But he's a prat, Alice! How can I?" she said helplessly, putting her fork down on the side of her plate. She sighed and then looked down the Gryffindor table, where she spotted all four of them, heads bent towards the middle of the table, whispering to each other. Planning. Plotting. She could tell.
His hair was messy as always, but it did not do anything to hinder his appearance. In a way, it complemented him, she decided. His messy hair, his flamboyant personality... they were different than that of Sirius's. Sirius was born to be that way. James had made himself that way. So it seemed now. He was different. Wasn't he?
Lily blinked, realizing what she had been thinking. She brought her gaze back to Alice, who was smiling at her knowingly and chewing on her biscuit.
"Don't look at me like that," Lily said tersely.
"Okay," Alice replied cheerfully, her face assuming a similar, more innocent expression.
"I hate you," Lily stated blandly.
The brunette chirped in response, "No, you don't,"
"You're right. I don't."
"I'm always right."
"Shut up," Lily said, giggling her seriousness away.
Half an hour later, she sat in a stiff backed chair in the Prefect meeting room, her head propped up on her hand while she attempted to poke her eye out with her sugarquill. She really had nothing better to. A fifth-year Ravenclaw prefect was droning on and on about tighter bathroom control, as they were becoming less of laboratories and more of hang-out spots, and she honestly had stopped listening the second he started, preferring to poke her eye out with her quill. She stifled a yawn and lifted her head slightly to relief the stress that her hand was going through in propping up her head, although that position only made her neck hurt. She sighed loudly, a little too loudly probably, and glanced over at James, who was sitting right next to her at the table, both of them being Head Girl and Head Boy and all.
She was reassured to see that he was in a similar state of being, although he looked much closer to falling asleep. He seemed to sense that she was looking at him, for at that moment he looked up and met her gaze, surprised for a second. Then he rolled his eyes and mouthed "kill me now." She smiled, almost shyly, and nodded her head in agreement before looking away, not knowing what else to do. She stared forward and listened to him make odd rustling noises beside her for a while, and then she heard a low scraping sound that sounded like a quill on parchment.
A second later, a scrap of parchment was pushed across the table into her view, and she placed a hand on it and drew it closer to her, slightly nervous. He hadn't bothered to fold it or anything, there wasn't any need to, and she began reading the words on the paper.
So, how is life?
She dipped her head forward and squinted her eyes at the question in amazement. So, how is life? What sort of question was that? She puzzled over how to answer. Finally, she decided on:
Life is alright. And yours?
She slid the paper back towards him, and so it continued.
That's good. Mine is okay. Could be better.
Yes. That's usually how it is.
True. And... how is school?
Hah. It's the usual.
Usual?
You know. Potions is dreary. Charms is fun. Same people, same places. The usual.
Same people, same places? Does that bother you?
Only sometimes... certain people and certain places.
Ah. I see. I know what you mean.
Do you? Perhaps. Though you never seem to run out of things to do though.
Trust me I do.
You have good friends.
Yes. I'm lucky. You have good friends, too.
Well. I thought I did. I have some good friends though, yes.
So that's good.
Magic never ceases to amaze me. You know. I can never get enough of it.
Same here. Its sort of different for you though, I guess.
Yeah...
Er... so what are you doing after Hogwarts?
I'm not positive yet. Looking into Auror training, as you know. Maybe the Ministry even.
You'd make a great Auror. Don't work for the Ministry. That's boring.
Well. Maybe I like boring...
But boring is for people like Severus Snape. He's a greasy git. You're not even close.
Don't get me started, James.
Okay. I'm trying. I've been trying, Lily. I'm sorry. I don't know what to do. It's so hard. Ah, listen to me babble in a note. Do you want me to stop? Now, that is.
No.
Okay.. Can't we be friends, Lily? Can't we just try? Do you hate me that much? I'll be nice to you. Just talk to me. Please?
James watched as Lily stared at the paper, her hair falling over her face and obscuring her features from view. She stared at it for such a long time that James thought he had made a mistake. He wanted to melt away from view. But finally, she lifted her trembling hand and scratched something on the ink-stained parchment before pushing it ever so slowly back towards him, not meeting his eyes the whole time.
He looked down.
I'll try.