Rating: PG-13

Disclaimer: I don't own and am not affiliated with The OC or Fox.

Author's Note: I hope you all enjoy this chapter, it was pretty hard to write for me. I hope you feel what I was trying to make the characters feel. The song that goes with this chapter is Down by Something Corporate. They are one of my favorite bands, and this is one of my favorite songs off their new album, North. If you haven't heard it, I suggest reading this song as you listen to it--because it makes it that more melancholy. I'm going to post another Something Corporate inspired song this weekend hopefully, called Me and the Moon, but it's gonna be about Julie Cooper-Nichol, so you've been warned. Please leave me feedback! And thanks to those who faithfully leave reviews. Enjoy…

Still Fighting It

Chapter 8: you can't change this loneliness

So here he was, at his desk, looking at the papers that Summer had just handed him a few hours ago. He wondered how long she had had them. It was so strange how things could change. Just yesterday, he had spent a whole day at the happiest place on earth with his family, and now his disposition was quite possibly the shittiest feeling ever. He looked over the list of songs that he was supposed to perform for his family and friends and fans at his homecoming concert. They were pretty much all about Summer. Everything was always about Summer. He wasn't giving up on her even if she wanted him too. He grabbed his keys and his computer and left his record label's building. He didn't want to be late for his date with his wife.

---

Summer was wearing a simple sundress and Seth was wearing a t-shirt, blazer, and jeans, and a baseball cap as some sort of disguise. They looked like the perfect couple to anyone who was looking. Danny had been so happy when they left the house, dressed up, in one car. He had been beaming the whole day. The two looked so casual, like they were on a date. But there was nothing casual about the night at all. Seth felt like throwing up every second of the drive, and he could not look at Summer. She sat, quietly, also feeling sick. It was hard to break up with someone that you loved. They both loved each other, it was just not meant to be.

Let's get drunk, you can drive us to the harbor

Wish upon a star, but do you know what stars are?

Balls of fire burning up the black space

Falling from the landscape

Exploding in the face of God…

The stars shone over them, stitches in a blanket of night. They had decided to eat at a restaurant that was not in Newport. Somewhere quiet, but with enough people to make it more comfortable. The restaurant, Bangkok 4, was in South Coast Plaza, where the mood was usually high and exciting. There was something about this place that made most people happy. Maybe it was the jewelry on display at Tiffany and Cartier, or the glamorous facades at Gucci and Dior. Maybe it was the kids riding on the carousel, or the business people who escaped the daily grind at Borders. He'd been there many times before, but he wasn't too happy this time around. Seth remembered when he and Summer used to hang out there when they were in high school. She would drag him to the lingerie stores, Victoria's Secret and La Perla, and he would protest, but secretly enjoy it at the same time. He remembered when they spent hours and hours at Williams Sonoma, Pottery Barn, and Crate & Barrel choosing their wedding registry. Then Pottery Barn kids to choose things for Danny's baby registry. There was no special, joyful occasion this time. Instead of choosing things to build up their life together, they were making steps to tear their life apart. After ordering a third drink, they sat in silence, but Summer had to get this over with.

"Seth, I need those papers signed. Trust me, the faster this goes, the easier it will be."

"The faster it goes? It's been seven years, Summer, I think a few more weeks won't make that much of a difference."

"They might make a difference to Danny."

"Or they might make a difference to Jared."

"Don't bring him into this, Seth."

"Why not, you're so into him, and he's such a big part of this, so why not?"

"Jared cares about me Seth, he wants me to be happy. He wants us to be happy, together. We have a lot of long term plans, Seth."

"So, does Danny know about any of these plans?"

"Not yet, I don't think it's such a good idea that I tell him while I'm still married to you."

"Right. Well, I'm not signing the papers now." She scowled at him, but he ignored it.

"Dammit Seth. Just do it so we can get this over with," her teeth were clenched and she hissed out the words with as much venom as she could muster. Why couldn't he just sign the damn papers? Each day that went by made it harder for her to be around him. Why couldn't he just let her go?

"Get what over with, us? There is no end to us Summer, we have way too much invested in one another. I'm doing a concert in three weeks, after that, I'll be going home. I'll be out of your hair for good except when I come to see our son. Until then, I will not sign the papers." She let out an exasperated sign, but didn't fight it. She knew his stubbornness well, and knew she couldn't win this time. Not when he spoke like that. There were many things Summer got away with, but when Seth spoke in that tone, she had to surrender. Seth ordered another drink. It was the only way he could cope with this. They sat and ate the rest of their meal in silence. Summer fumed silently, her cheeks red. She was seriously on the verge of a rage blackout. She was sexy when she was about to rip his eyes out. But he glared back at her from his side of the table, and slowly, their anger cancelled each other's out.

Let's get crazy, talk about our big plans

Places that you're going

Places that I haven't been

Build my walls up, concrete castle

Keep this kingdom free of hassle

---

Back in Newport, Ryan and Marissa were walking on the pier with Danny and Jenna. Sandy and Kirsten were watching the baby while Danny's aunt and uncle took him out for dinner. Everyone knew what was going down at that very moment in Costa Mesa, and they wanted to make sure that Danny had his fun before he found out that his parents were not going to be together for very much longer. They had just eaten at the Crab Shack and were now strolling in the cool summer breeze, enjoying the sights of a small fair that had been set up on the pier. Marissa shivered, and Ryan took that as a cue to go back to the car and get her coat. Danny ambled along with him, happily watching all of the families on the beach. Soon, his family would be like that again, going to the beach together and having barbecues. He would toss a Frisbee with his Dad, while his mom set up the picnic. His grandparents and Aunt and Uncle would be there too. Everything would be the way it was supposed to be.

Ryan walked back from the car, holding Danny's hand. "Hey, let's get an ice cream from your aunt and cousin, and for us." Danny smiled and anxiously waited with Ryan in line. Ryan looked down at his nephew, he was so happy, jubilant. He didn't know what Seth and Summer were going to do when they told him. Ryan reached the front of the line and ordered Marissa and Jenna's favorite flavors. He looked over at Danny, who was looking at something further down the beach.

"What flavor do you want, Danny?" He watched as Danny's eyes squinted to see something.

"Strawberry."

"And one strawberry please. Thanks," Ryan took the cones and handed one to Danny, who

was standing completely still.

"Hey, what'cha looking at?" Danny took his cone, but let the summer heat melt it. He pointed at two figures that were walking towards them. Ryan looked down the beach and saw him. Jared. With another woman. Looking very friendly with another woman. His heart rate quickened. Maybe they were making a false assumption, maybe the woman was his sister or something. Jared leaned down to kiss the woman.

Ryan was pretty sure that she was not his sister.

Jared took his arm and wrapped it around her, while nuzzling her neck. They were holding hands. Ryan felt nauseous. He covered Danny's eyes and shushed him.

They were getting very close to where Ryan and Danny were standing, so Ryan pushed himself and Danny behind the ice cream stand. Danny looked like he was about to cry, but he didn't know why he felt this way. All he knew was that he saw something that he wasn't supposed to see, since his uncle had reacted the way he did. Ryan's eyes were wide. Jared and friend walked by without seeing them and Ryan let out his breath that he had been holding for sometime. What was he going to do? He had to tell Summer and Seth.

"Danny, hey, look at me. I'm going to take care of this. Don't cry, it's okay. Nothing is your fault." It's that bastard Jared's fault. Ryan's phone started ringing, and he answered it. It was his wife, wondering where they were. He chattered on the phone like nothing had happened and led Danny back over to where Marissa was waiting.
---

"What am I going to do?" Ryan paced around his kitchen while Marissa looked on from a barstool.

"I don't know, Ry. I mean, she needs to know, but with everything going on right now with Seth, she's not going to take it well. Do we really even have proof that he's cheating?"

"Well, I don't know what your definition of cheating is, but he was certainly pulling a Luke and Holly," Marissa cringed at the thought and clenched her fists. What a dick.

"Do you think we should talk to Seth first? Maybe he'll know how to approach the subject with her, and since Danny knows, maybe you and Seth can talk to him and try to explain. It would be better coming from you two. I bet he's really confused right now."

"Hmm, that's not a bad idea, Seth is the brains, he'll have some sort of plan to work this out. At least we can wait until tomorrow though, and we don't have to deal with it tonight."

"What time are they coming over?"

"12, for lunch with us and Luke and Stacy. Jared will be there also."

"Great," Marissa said wryly. She did not want to see her best friend hurt again, but it didn't look too good. Hopefully things would turn out okay, and they would not have to suffer the wrath of the rage blackout.

---

Seth walked through the front door after Summer. He followed her upstairs, and went into his guest room while she went into hers. Well, technically, it was their bedroom, but the details were not important. He lay in bed, wide awake for many hours, as did she. They were only a few feet from one another, yet they were so far away. Seth didn't want to let her go. She didn't want him to let her go either, but at the same time, she needed him to let go so she could move on with her life. Have a new life with another man. She had so many new plans. Plans that didn't involve Seth. All he wanted was for things to go back to normal. The way things were. She couldn't do that. It was for the best.

But I hear sound echo in the emptiness

All around, but you can't change this loneliness

Look at what you've found

I'm falling down

---

Everyone plastered on their fake smiles for the casual lunch at Ryan and Marissa's. Ryan and Marissa and Danny knew of Jared infidelity and thus were trying their best to keep their composure. Ryan was trying hard to not kick the shit out of Jared right then and there. Marissa was also doing the same. After so many years of marriage to Ryan, his violent nature sort of rubbed off on her. She thought she could probably take most of the Newpsies on the PTA. Seth and Summer were going through their divorce drama and thus needed to keep face in front of Danny. And Jared just sat there and cracked jokes like nothing was wrong. Luke and Stacy did not know what exactly what was going on, but something had to be up. Ryan took Seth into his office and closed the door.

"Seth, I have to talk to you."

"Umm, okay, this is kind of freaking me out. You know I have a fear of closed spaces."

"My office is like bigger than the size of my old house in Chino."

"Still, can you like crack a window or something?" Seth smiled, but quickly lost his expression when he saw Ryan's grim face. "Yo, what's the matter?"

"Last night, when we were at the beach, Danny and I saw Jared."

"Oh yeah? What was he doing, being a huge douche bag?" he chuckled to himself.

"No, he was with another girl."

The color drained from Seth's face. "What?"

"He was kissing another woman. I tried to cover Danny's eyes, but he saw it."

"That motherfucker, I'll kill him. Summer doesn't deserve that!"

"Hey, keep your voice down. Only Marissa and Danny know about it. Marissa thought it would be a good idea if you and I talked to Danny first about what happened."

"That little prick, I'll kill him. He's going to hurt her and I'll kill him."

"Stop saying that. Calm down, Seth. I'll go get Danny, and we can talk to him." Ryan left and a little while later came back with Danny who looked extremely sullen.

"Hey, kiddo. I heard about what you saw yesterday. And it wasn't right, and I know you're confused, but we're here to talk to you about it." Danny did not say anything.

"Yeah, Danny. We're going to talk to Jared about what we saw him doing, and we'll see what he has to say, but for now, we're going to act the same way around him. I don't want you to do anything different than what you've done before, we'll clear this up and everything will be better, I promise."

"Is Jared going to go away?" Danny looked, with hopeful eyes at his father and uncle.

"Well, we don't know, but we'll see." Seth tousled Danny's hair and sighed. Everything just got more complicated.

---

"Summer, we need to talk." They were back at home in Summer's bedroom. She turned and looked at him with an expression of annoyance plastered all over her face.

"What is it Seth, I'm kind of busy right now."

"It's about Jared."

"What about him?"

"Well, the other night, when we were having dinner, Danny and Ryan saw him at the beach, with another woman."

She raised her head and looked at him. She shook her head and glared at him.

"Who do you think you are, Seth? You cannot just come back here and try to ruin my life. You've been gone for seven years, just because you aren't happy, doesn't mean I can't be too, or does it? You can't stand to see that I've moved on. What is wrong with you? Why can't you just leave me alone?"

"Summer, I'm not making this up. They saw him at the beach." His voice softened, but she still could not discern his sincerity.

"God, and how could you bring our son into this? How could you use him to get to me? Get it into you thick skull Seth, I don't love you anymore. I'm with Jared now. You can't just use some ploy to pull me away from him so that I will go running back into your arms. It doesn't work that way. When people love each other, they don't lie to each other."

"I'm not lying, Summer. You can ask Ryan, or better yet ask your son!" Seth was getting frustrated. This was not the way he had envisioned it in his mind. He thought, he could tell Summer, and she'd believe him, running back into his arms. He thought that everything could be okay now. But it was worse than before. Now she thought he was a liar.

"No, no I won't! Because I trust Jared. This is pathetic, Seth. I mean, stoop a little lower why don't you."

"You don't know what you're talking about," he snarled at her, and she was taken aback for a second, but she recovered quickly. No one, no one, could out-sneer Summer Roberts.

"I know exactly what I'm talking about. You're jealous that I am moving on. You want to ruin this relationship so that I will go to you for comfort. But I'm not going to, so give up."

"What are you talking about, Summer. I could get any girl I wanted, I could go out right now and find someone. That's not the problem. The problem is that I love you too much and I don't want you to get hurt by some guy who couldn't possibly care about you as much as I do. No one could ever love you like I love you."

"If you love me, then let me go. I don't feel anything for you anymore Seth." She looked into his eyes. Seth walked up to her, grabbed her and forced his lips on hers. He kissed her with as much passion as he could muster from his emotionally exhausted body. His hands roamed her back and pulled on her hair. He broke the kiss and saw her fiery eyes staring back at him.

"Tell me you don't feel anything for me now." He walked out of the house, slamming the door on the way out.

Danny stood up from his position, crouching at the top of the stairs. He couldn't see anything, but he heard the whole conversation. He had to make his mom believe his dad. Whatever he and Ryan had seen was bad. Both of his parents were angry, he had never heard his Daddy raise his voice. And now Mommy had her face in her hands and she was crying. She never cried. Danny crawled back into his room and got under the covers. He clutched Captain Oats close and fell into a fitful sleep.

Taste the saline, rolling from your cheekbone

Tell me that you're alone

Tell me on the telephone

Feel your heart, it breaks within your chest now

Try to get some rest now

Sleep's not coming easy for awhile, child

Child…

But I hear sound echo in the emptiness

All around, but you can't change this loneliness

Look at what you've found

I'm falling down

Down…

Down by Something Corporate