Chapter 18 p.2: A Cinderella Story, Rehearsals

AN3: This is the second chapter I've started today. Well, the more reviews I get, the faster I write this story! Okay! FF7 is owned by Squaresoft, and Laura is owned by LadyTifa 26! GOT IT?!

"GIMME BACK THE PAPER!", yelled Rachel. "But yeah, here are your parts! Cid, you are NOT the king. Reeve, you are.

"Fine with me.", said Reeve.

"And Tifa, you didn't quite make it as princess, so you are the court advisor."

"Whatever.", said Tifa.

"Um, Scarlet?"

"What?", asked Scarlet.

"Were you having a slapping rematch with Tifa? Forget it, she won back on the Sister Ray."

"I WILL HAVE MY REVENGE!", shouted Scarlet.

"Anyway, you are the evil step-mother, as well as Heideggar and Palmer. Don Corneo, you're the understudy for either of them. And yeah, this is gonna be great. YOU TWO ARE PLAYING WOMEN!"

"Shut up. . .", said Palmer. "Just no polyester in the dress. It chafes my skin. . ."

"Yeah. . .", said Rachel. "Anyway, Yuffie, let's see. . . Deciding your part was hard. . . Oh well, you can be the ninja/messenger who invites the people and maybe any other part."

"Right-o!", said Yuffie.

"Aeris, you are Cinderella."

"Hey! Cool!", said Aeris. "But Tifa was pretty good, too."

"Yeah, but I figured you would look more pitiful."

"Oh."

"YEAH! Moving on, Barret, you are the driver of the carriage. Which means. . ."

"What?"

"Since this is the Disney version, that means you are a mouse in the beginning. . ."

"A MOUSE?!"
"Sorry dude! That's all I got!"

"Grrr. . ."

"Lucrecia, as I understand, you are working on the set?"

"Yep!", said Lucrecia. "That's me! I'm already working on the lights and stuff."

"Okay then. Sadie, you'll be working with her. And you too, um. . .Konoshi?"

"Yeah, that's me.", said a girl in a black tank top with a pink heart in the middle, and silver hair with pink highlights.

"You are working on the set. You will be working with Holly. . ."

"Yo.", waved a girl in the back, who was drawing something.

"What are you doing?"

"Here." Holly handed over the piece of paper, and when Rachel saw it, her eyes widened, and hid it in her pocket.

"HEHEH! YES! WELL!", said Rachel loudly.

"What was that?", asked Cloud.

"NOTHING FOR YOU TO SEE!"

"GIVE ME IT!" Cloud wrestled her for it, and finally took it from her pocket. "WHOA! Um, that's supposed to be bigger.", said Cloud, pointing to a part of the paper.

"What was that?", asked Aeris in a whisper. Rachel whispered back.

"Nude Cloud pic. BUT ONCE AGAIN! MOVING ON! Holly, you are working with Selena and Konoshi, and maybe with Surka. Those are the stagehands. Back on to the characters in the story, Red, you are the step-sister's cat."

"DEMEANING!", said Red. "I'm smarter than most of you here!"

"TOO BAD! YOU LOOK A LOT LIKE A CAT, SO YOU ARE! And, drum roll please, the role of the prince! Now, I actually think both of you did an equal job.", said Rachel. "So, who looks more like a prince? Who thinks Vincent?" Five hands went up. "Why? Yuffie?"

"Well, it's the long black hair. Makes him look almost elegant, if not feminine.", said Yuffie.

"Feminine?! What do you mean?!", asked Vincent.

"It's sorta true.", said Laura. "He uses Pantene Pro-V."

"HOW DO YOU KNOW?!"

"I WENT THROUGH YOUR BATHROOM! NINJA!", she said, taking a ninja stance.

"Anybody else have an opinion? Konoshi?"

"Looks like Sephiroth, kinda."

"Okaaaaay. . . Anybody else? Anybody other than Laura, whom we all know loves?"

"Awww. . .", moaned Laura.

"Now, who votes Cloud?" Nine hands went up.

"Okay? Why, other than the obvious?", asked Rachel.

"HE LOOKS LIKE A GOD!", shouted Holly.

"Like I said, OTHER than the obvious."

"Well, the physique is nice.", said Aeris. "And you know the amount of gel he puts in his hair has to be expensive to keep it like that, so he'd have to be rich."

"Good, good! Anybody else?" Holly was jumping up and down. "Anybody? Come on! Fine. . .Holly."

"MOST OF THE GIRLS HERE LIKE CLOUD!"

"Actually, no. Most here like Sephiroth. Including me. But I DO love Cloud more. The hair makes him look less like a woman. So, since I guess I feel like it, CLOUD IS THE PRINCE! Vincent, you are the understudy."

"Fine with me.", said Vincent. "It'd be awkward kissing Aeris anyway. Besides, I know Cloud would try and kill me if I did."

"No doubts there. . .", said Cloud.

"And as for Brad and Mike, you take care of the hecklers and critics."

"My pleasure. . .", said Mike, cracking his knuckles and brandishing a gun.

"No prob.", said Brad, sharpening his shurikens.

"Am I forgetting anybody. . .Cid, you are the understudy for the king. . .Laura, you are the understudy for the court advisor. . ."
"Why not Cinderella?"

"Because you look more like Tifa than Aeris. ANYBODY ELSE?!"

"What about you?", asked Cloud.

"I'm the director, DUH. I have to run this thing."

"Then we're doomed. . .", sighed Vincent.

"Ha, ha, Mr. Funny man. Don't make me make you the Fairy Godmother."

"Who IS, the fairy godmother?", asked Aeris.

"Pffff! Okay, Laura! Fairy Godmother!"

"But I'm younger than Aeris! How can I be her godmother?!"

"Fairies work in mysterious ways. . . YOU! GODMOTHER! OKAY! LET'S REHEARSE!"

"Okay, we are rehearsing the entrance of the fairy godmother! RELEASE THE SMOKE!" Meagan pulls another rope, and a hose releases a blue fog, that sweeps over the stage.

"HACK!", coughed Laura. "WHAT IS THIS EVIL CLOUD OF. . .EVIL!?"

"FAIRY GODMOTHERS DO NOT CHOKE!", yelled Rachel. "REDO THIS!"

"OKAY! AGAIN! RELEASE THE SMOKE!", ordered Rachel. The smoke was released again, and this time, there was no coughing. "GOOD! Wait. TAKE THAT OFF!" Laura was onstage, wearing a gas mask. "FAIRY GODMOTHERS DO NOT NEED GAS MASKS!"

"I AM A SPECIAL FAIRY GODMOTHER!", yelled Laura.

"YEAH, THE GODMOTHER OF BIOLOGICAL WARFARE! TAKE IT OFF!"

"Mean. . ."

"AHEM! RELEASE THE SMOKE!", Rachel demanded again. "WE HAVE TO GET THIS RIGHT!" Instead of coughing, giggling was heard. "What now. . .?", sighed Rachel. "HEY! THAT IS NOT WHAT SMOKE IS FOR! IT IS NOT A PRIVACY VEIL!" Laura was pinning down Vincent to the back wall, and he had this look of terror on his face.

"Huh?", said Laura. "Oops. . ."

"NO MAKING OUT WITH UNDERSTUDIES! I need a Tylenol. . .", groaned Rachel, putting her head down on the desk. "Why. . .?"

"START THE BEGINNING! KAMI! YOU ARE THE NARRATOR!" Kami looked down from the catwalk, and ran to a microphone. "START THE INTRO!" The lights are dimmed, and a spotlight shines down on Aeris, who is quietly sweeping the floor in a tattered dress.

"AHEM!", coughed Kami. "There once was a- SCREEEEEEECH!" The microphone was busted. "Um, named Cinde-SCREEEEECH!-rella and-SCREEEEEEECH!"

"AGH!", yelled Rachel, clasping her ears. "IT BURNS! MAKE IT STOP!" Everybody else was holding their ears, except Konoshi, who was wearing ear muffs.

"HAHA! HEY!" Konoshi was laughing at Holly, who was standing right next to the microphone, and she took his ear muffs and ran off with them. "GIVE THOSE BACK!"

"FIX THAT MICROPHONE!"

"OKAY! LET'S DO THIS AGAIN!", shouted Rachel. Aeris was still onstage, and they began the scene again.

"There once was a neglected young girl named Cinderella.", said Kami. "who lived in the kingdom of Osterland, and-wha?" CREEEEK! The set behind Aeris was beginning to fall.

"What the-?", said Aeris. "AHHHHHH! OW!" Aeris made a run for it, but it was too far gone, and she was crushed. "Cure! Ah! Better!" She crawled out from underneath.

"Um, Sadie?", asked Rachel. "What was that?"

"GET BACK HERE!", yelled Kami, chasing after Holly with the ear muffs. "THOSE ARE MINE!"

"GOTTA CATCH ME! HAHA!", laughed Holly.

"GRRRR!"

"Okay, now that THAT has been fixed. . .",. said Rachel, watching Vincent tie both of them up with rope. "We will now do the scene where Laura ascends, and takes her leave after helping Cinderella! Laura! Do you have the cords on?"

"They're giving me a wedgie .", said Laura, tugging on them.

"Yeah, well nobody said they'd be comfortable! Start the scene!"

"Good luck, Cinderella!", said Laura. "And remember, be back by midnight!"

"Thank you fairy godmother!", said Aeris, waving.

"PULL THE CORD!", yelled Rachel.

"OKAY!", said Laura.

"NO! NOT YOU!"

"GAAAAAHHHH!" Laura yanked on the cord as hard as she could, pulling down Sadie who was the one who had to operate the machine to hoist her. "Ow! Huh?" The machine was tipping over the edge. "AAHHHHH! OUCH!" Laura, Sadie, and now the machine were piled in a heap on the stage. "Cure. . .3. . .", mumbled Laura from under the weight. "Ow. . ."

"PULL THE CORD, SADIE!", yelled Rachel, after they were healed. "Sadie?" Sadie was sitting by the machine, reading a magazine.

"What's going on?", asked Laura, who was just standing there.

"SADIE!", bellowed Rachel. "MOVE IT!"

"Huh! OH YEAH!", realized Sadie. "HOLD ON TO YOUR SHORTS!"

"What? BLAAAAAAAAGH!" Sadie had hoisted her up to fast, and Laura was sent flying. "AAGH! LET ME DOWN!"

"WORKING ON IT!", yelled Sadie. "OKAY!"

"DAH!" Laura landed flat on her face. "M-medic. . .PLEASE. . ."

"DO I HAVE TO!?"

"Yes Cloud, you do.", said Rachel, dragging him onto the set. "Laura is injured, and one more will put her out of commission. YOU ARE TESTING THIS! PUT ON THE CORDS!"

"Fine. . .", sighed Cloud. He put on the cords and waist-thingy that goes on there.

"SADIE! PULL!", yelled Rachel.

"GOT IT!" SHOOF!

"Why is it drafty in here?", asked Cloud. A few catcalls were heard, and Holly blew a whistle.

"Um, Cloud?", said Rachel. "I don't think you put the waist on right. Your pants. . ."

"Huh? AGH!" He looked down, and everybody could see his pink chocobo boxers.

"Let's do the scene with the prince, the king, and the advisor.", said Rachel. "BRING EM' OUT!" Reeve, Cloud, and Tifa walked on.

"HOLD ON!", yelled Yuffie, looking really distressed, and jumping down from the catwalk. "WHERE'S THE FIRE EXTINGUISHER?!"

"Er, if you don't my me asking, WHY?!", asked Rachel.

"You see, Laura was with Vincent in the back. . ."

"I can see where this is going. . .", mumbled Rachel.

"And Laura said something, and accidentally cast Fire. . .3", said Yuffie.

"I KNEW IT WAS BAD TO GIVE HER MASTERED MATERIA!", said Tifa.

"Um, Tifa?", said Cloud.

"What?" Cloud was pointing up, with a nervous expression. "The ceiling. . ."

"Huh? WAUGH! ICE3!" The ceiling was on fire, and was about to collapse. And it began. . .snowing.

"Tifa,", said Reeve. "Never point up and cast Ice. It causes snow."

"WHEEE!", squealed Rachel, running up to the stage. "SNOW!" She began making snow angels onstage.

"YAY!" Laura ran up, and began making a snowball. "THINK FAST, VINNIE!"

"What? AAH!" Laura hurled the snowball and hit him in the face. Directly.

"HEY MIKE!", yelled Sadie. "THIS IS FOR TRYING TO SHOOT ME! HIYAH!" Sadie jammed snow down Mike's pants.

"AHHHHHH! NOT THE FRONT! NOT THE FRONT! OH SWEET JESUS!", yelled Mike. "NOT COOL! NOT COOL!"

"Awww, no more snow. . .", said Rachel.

"And all this because our director is a child. . .", said Vincent, shaking his head.

"Shut up! Anyway, I think you all should know, that opening night is this Friday. Do we all have our lines memorized?" Everybody nodded. "Is everything fixed?"

"Well, there's still a hole in the ceiling.", said Sadie. "And the lifter machine is busted."

"Konoshi hit Holly over the head with the microphone, so that's not working.", said Kami. Konoshi and Holly were standing beside each other, glaring angrily.

"And the fog machine is wearing out.", said Megan. "And Surka is trying to unfreeze the floor with Selena."

"DAMN YOU EVIL FLOOR!", shouted Surka. "UNFREEZE, DAMMIT!" Selena was watching, with a sweat mark.

"Well Lucrecia?", asked Rachel. "What about the lights?"

"I think they're good to go!", called Lucrecia from the catwalk. "Here!"

"AGH!", yelled Rachel, the spotlight right on her. "WHAT KIND OF LIGHT IS THAT?!"

"Halogen", said Lucrecia. "Why?"

"TOO BRIGHT! IT BURNS!"

"Sorry." Lucrecia turned the light off.

"Blind. . .", said Rachel, rubbing her eyes. "Anyway, are all the costumes done?"

"Of course.", said Reeve. "We're wearing them."

"GRAVY THEN! So, all we have to do is fix this place up a bit, and we should be fine!"

"How many tickets have been sold?", asked Laura.

"ALL OF THEM!", said Rachel. "It seems people like this story. . . Oh, and the president is gonna be here, too. And yes, the Turks are his guards for him, so Reno and the others will be here, too."

"RENO!", squealed Selena, Surka, and Konoshi.

"Yeah. . .", said Rachel. "Pretty much all the bishonen will be present. SO DESPITE THAT, STAY FOCUSED!"

"But you said it!", said Selena. "All the bishies will be there! How will we focus with all the pretty men?!"

"Okay. You said 'pretty men'. That's a little odd.", said Rachel. "And just think that if they love your performance, they'll love you!"

"But we're stage crew.", said Sadie. "AND I LIKE SEPHIROTH! HOW IN HELL IS HE GONNA SEE ME?!"

"Fine. . .", said Rachel. "You can have the gi-normous banner of Sephiroth back there."

"SQUEE! SEPHY SAMA!", squealed Sadie.

"Yeah, and for the rest of you Sephy fans. . .", said Rachel, talking to all the girls wearing a "We love Sephiroth" tee shirt with him posing shirtless on it. "First of all, I knew I shouldn't have given you those shirts. Next of all, you can have a banner like that. JUST STAY FOCUSED!"

"GOTCHA BOSS!", they all said, saluting.

"Boss?", asked Laura. "Why boss?"

"I like boss! What's wrong with boss?!", asked Rachel.

"Sigh. . ."

"OKAY! TODAY'S THE LAST DAY!", said Rachel, two days later from the Fire3 incident. "Now that everything is fixed, and everybody knows their lines, is there anything that needs a run through?"

"We never did our part.", said Palmer. "Sadie kept locking us in the broom closet!"

"I'm surprised you FIT in the broom closet, you gelatinous oaf.", said Sadie. "Next of all, it was your fault! I bait you with cheesecake, and you follow! I can't believe you! HOW SUSPICIOUS IS CHEESECAKE IN A BROOM CLOSET?! I MEAN, COME ON?!"

"Well, madam meany-pants," said Palmer. "that was damn good cheesecake! And it looked good, too! I couldn't resist something like that!"

"I could.", said Rachel. "I don't like cheesecake."

"HEATHEN!", said Palmer, pointing a fat finger at her. "SHE DENIES THE CAKE OF CHEESINESS!"

"Shut up.", said Scarlet.

"GYAHAHAHA!", laughed Heideggar.

"Is it any wonder Rufus fired you?", asked Scarlet. "Other than the fact you and Palmer kept raiding the company fridge?"

"Why do you hurt my feelings. . .", said Heideggar. "IT'S NOT NICE!"

"Calm down, Heidi. . .", said Palmer. "She didn't mean it, did you Scarlet?"

"I meant it with every fiber of my being. . .", said Scarlet coldly.

"WAAHH!", cried Heideggar.

"I'm just gonna walk away. . .", said Rachel.

"I'm coming, too.", said Laura.

"Don't forget us!", said the rest.

"WAAAAAAAHHH!"

Keo: So that's it?

Rachel: YES INDEED!

AN3: Heh! I'm surprised anybody is even reading these author's notes. . . Anyway, opening night is the next chapter! What will happen. . .?

Sadie: And how much am I getting paid to be a stagehand?

AN3: Uh. . .

Meagan: Me, too?!

AN3: Well. . .

Brad: Are we even getting paid?

AN3: Well, you didn't demand any money! You just gave me a resume, and POOF! Here you are! And don't ask for money! I already have your permission!

Resume people: Awwww. . .

Tifa: So next time, we publicly humiliate ourselves, right?

AN3: YOU GOT IT!

Keo: And shouldn't my name in here be LadyTifa26? That IS my pen name. . .

AN3: Meh. It's just easier to call you Keo. And besides, what if I called myself Rachel, like my actual name? You wouldn't be able to tell me and the other one apart!

Keo: Nah. You're the one in the black shirt, and Rachel is wearing the white one.

AN3: I mean BESIDES that.

Keo: Oh. But Rachel's hair is up, and yours is down, PLUS, you're the one with the script in your hand.

AN3: Excuse me. leaves comes back in wearing a white shirt and hair up no script How about now?

Keo: It says your name right there. points to paper

AN3: I GIVE UP!

Keo: PLUS, Rachel has-

AN3: I ALREADY GAVE UP! SHEESH! DROP IT ALREADY! JOIN US NEXT TIME FOR ALTERNATE EARTH!

Cid: Pfff. . .as if THAT is gonna happen. . .

AN3: growls