Chapter 25: The Birthday Time Forgot
A/N: FF7 characters are owned by Squaresoft and LadyTifa26 owns Laura! If you own a character that you sent in, you know the hell who own them and I won't name them because I don't feel like naming like, twenty or so people! This is Aeris' birthday episode, just to say, soooo....eeeyeaaaah....Go on.
"OH MY FRIGGIN' GOD!" Aeris was enthusiastically writing in a book at the desk in the room she split with Rachel. "IT'S HERE! ANY MINUTE NOW! I'm extremely nervous, and. . .AND. . . GAH! You don't know what I'm writing about, do you?" Yeah, as you should know, this is her diary. YEP. ANOTHER one. But hey, it's probably better. In fact, PRAY it's better. "But it's my 23rd birthday (YAY!), and er, as you should know. . . I'M STILL A VIRGIN! OH MY GAAAWD! WHERE HAVE I BEEN?! Well, other than somebody else's bed. . . But, what brought this up is. . . Well, I'll start at the beginning of today. . ."
"Cloud, what is this place?" I was sitting in a bathing suit with a cloth tied to my waist and a tropical flower of some sort, and he was helping me stand while he was dressed in a tux. Very weird.
"Aeris. . .", he said. "Isn't this your dream?"
"Sure feels like it. . .", I mumbled. I looked up at a building sitting on a cliff. It was a clear evening on the shore, and there was. . .a puffin. Yeah, I don't know what I've been smoking (because I don't think I've ever smoked anything. . .), but this was weird. Too weird. But ANYWAY. . .He smiled down on with his radiant blue eyes glowing as it got darker. I love MAKO eyes. That should be like, something you get in plastic surgery because it's so COOL! I stood up, and he guided me with his arm to the building. Before I knew it, we were overlooking the beach from that place through a giant window, sitting at a table eating. Cloud, a romantic? Eww, that's totally a Zack thing. . . And neither of them have normal hair. . .
"Are you comfortable?", he asked, almost out of the blue.
"Yeah.", I said.
"It figures. . .", he said, his eyes growing distant. "Because of, your thoughts. . ."
"What about them?", I asked. "I'd be comfortable ANYWHERE if there were more chairs like this. . .", I said, looking at the leather chair I was in. TOO DAMN FREAKY.
"It's normal, in fact, a good thing to comfortable in anyone's own mind" He stepped behind me, and I continued to look out the window.
"Okay, Aeris?" I looked up. ZACK?!
I woke up still kinda early in the morning, which is really unusual for me because I like to sleep in a lot (which only hopelessly reminds me about the places I HAVEN'T slept, but at least it means I'm not a whore or something. . .), and I really didn't know it was my birthday. Honestly. I'm supposed to be dead somewhere in the Lifestream and decided then age was probably not important anymore, so I guess it stuck subconsciously. So, I moved downstairs, no knowing where the hell I was going (way too groggy; got up before I woke up), except to the smell of breakfast. DAMN, WHERE DID TIFA LEARN TO COOK?! A CULINARY SCHOOL?!
"HELLOOOOOO AERIIIIIIS!" Rachel was bobbing about like normal, pretty much happy as usual, or I don't know, on a sugar high or something. . . That child was dropped on the head, I SWEAR. . . She's nice when you get down to it, but she's way spacy and that can tire you out. "HAPPY DAY FOR YOOOOOUUUU!"
"What?", I thought. "It's morning?" See. No idea of where or when I was. "Oh yeah. . .I smell food. . ." The normal group was sitting at the table, you know, Vincent, Laura, Lucrecia, and then Tifa cooking Rachel doing whatever doesn't help, and then CLOUD! Ahem. I'll get to his importance in this BUUUUUT. . . He's so CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUTE! I wouldn't say he's hot because that might boost his ego, and it's FINE where it is now. . . (coughyeahrightcough!), but really. THE EYES, THE BICEPS, THE SKIN TIGHT SHIRT AND. . .the hair. Remind me to ask him about that again.
"Hello, Aeris. . .", he said in that silkily, velvety, sultry, yummy, delicious, TOTALLY. . .cute voice.
"Yes, my impassioned lover. . .", I responded, not caring who the hell heard.
"Care for me to give you my. . ." He took my wrist and spun me to his lap and into his arms. "Present?" He picked me up and ran me upstairs, and we spent the day. . .doing STUFF. FIN! (Fin, yes, the French word for end. Don't ask me what French-land is, as far as I know, there's no country named THAT. . . Rachel must have gotten even weirder to make up countries. . .)
God, you know you don't buy that story. Even I don't buy that story. And at any rate, if that were the case I wouldn't be telling you my story. I sorta DO wish it were the story though. . . AHEM! You didn't hear that.
"Aeris?" He was still talking to me. "Are you okay?" I know he cares about me, no shock there, and as much as I wish I could've said something else. What did I say, you ask?
"Mmph. . .bacon. . .", I grumbled. Bacon. COME ON! EVERYBODY WOULD LOVE BACON IF EVERYONE TRIED BACON! BACON AND PIE! TWO UNIVERSALLY LOVED FOODS! Now, bacon-pie. . .Sounds a little nasty, but it could work, right? WHY AM I EVEN TALKING ABOUT BACON?!
"Yeah, here's your bacon. . .", said Vincent, sliding over a plate of some closer to my normal chair.
"Jesus, Aeris, it looks like you were run over by a chocobo.", said Laura. Christina, who had just turned around looked like she would spit out whatever was in her mouth. Wow, thanks you guys, rub it in I'm not a morning person.
"HOLY SHIT, AERIS!", shouted Tifa. "Uh. . .I mean. . . Hi."
"I get the point. . .", I grumbled, sitting down to my seat. Why was everybody pointing this out? Was it THAT important?
Everybody was acting a little suspicious at breakfast. They would just say how great a day it was probably going to be for me, and what I wanted to do, and to brush my damn hair because I look like a wookie. Meh. 2 out of 3 is okay.
"Why do you ask?", I said, feeling better.
"You know why.", said Tifa, finally sitting down to breakfast. "Of all people YOU should know." WHY DOESN'T ANYBODY TELL ME WHAT'S GOING ON?! WATCH CID RUN OFF AND GET MARRIED AND I WOULDN'T KNOW FOR FIFTEEN YEARS!
"Uh, sure. . .", I replied. "Of course. Wait, it's already Valentine's Day?" A couple snickers and shocked expressions came from everybody else. What? Was a holiday about love, chocolate, and fat naked babies with wings a crime?
"Not quite. . .", said Laura. Not quite what? NOT QUITE WHAT?!
"Indeed. . .", said Rachel. INDEED WHAT?!
"It's uh, not Valentine's Day, Aeris. . .", said Christina. NOT VALENTINE'S-oh. That's not quite what. Indeed.
"Uh, Aeris. . .", said Vincent. "Are you SURE you don't know what day it is?"
"Saturday?"
"I GOT THIS THING AND-
"NO.", said I. Lucrecia had pulled out this funny looking helmet that was strapped to your head and would fry your brain. At least that's what it looked like.
"Okay, Aeris. . .", said Cloud. "Today, what happens to you?"
"Uh. . ." I was drawing a blank. Cloud was asking what was happening to me? Either I was becoming a mutant, spreading wings and flying, doing the national Shinra dance in a chocobo suit, or he was. . .gonna decide to do. . .stuff. With me. ALONE.
". . .Mutant flying dancing chocobo doing stuff. . .", I mumbled, still a little dazed For some reason, Rachel was stifling laughter. What? Was something in my teeth?
"Uh, Aeris?", asked Tifa this time. "How old are you?"
"22.", I responded. What? Was she reveling being two years younger than me? What's wrong with being 22?!
"Thirteen plus ten, Aeris. . .", said Laura.
"23?"
"GOOD GIRL!", she said.
"Yeah? So I can add. Can't you?" Their jaws dropped. Seriously, I must have had something the size of a piano in my teeth.
"Aeris. . .", sighed Cloud. "Happy b-
"NO!", hissed Rachel. "Have some fun with this. . ." Have fun with what? I couldn't hear the rest of the conversation, but hey! Aeris likes to have fun, too! SEE?! NOBODY TELLS ME ANYTHING!
"Happy b. . .b. . .", he said nervously. "Happy boxing day?"
"ALL RIGHT! BOXING!", shouted Rachel. "I WANNA FIGHT FIRST!"
"FIRST. . .", said Laura. "Boxing day is a holiday where you pack up Christmas decorations."
"Yeah?" Rachel was pointing to a withered Christmas tree. "We still got that."
"AND, MOST IMPORTANTLY. . .", said Laura. "It's a CANADIAN holiday."
"AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!", shouted Rachel.
"Making up countries again?", I asked.
"Apparently. . .", said Tifa.
Canada? Ha, ha, ha! There is no Canada! Must be a tropical dystopia by the sound of it. . . ANYWAY, nothing really happened in the afternoon. UNLESS, you DO want to hear about how I got all the aphids out of my garden. MWAHAHAHAAAA! THEY DIDN'T STAND A CHANCE AGAINST LUCRECIA'S NUCLEAR-. . .Oh. YES! UHEH! RIGHT! ANYWAY, TO THE EVENING!
I heard stuff from downstairs. I dunno, but it was getting pretty loud. Curious, I was nearing the door, when all of a sudden. . .
"Aeris?" I could tell it was Cloud through the corner of my eye. I let him approach me, while I shuffled through a few things on the desk.
"Yeah?"
"Aeris. . .", he said. "It is time to declare my undying love!"
"Oh Cloud!"
"Yes, my snoogie ookums!", he said.
"Truly, my Mr. Stud muffin?", I asked.
"Of course. . .", he said, his voice growing as smooth as velvet, as I stared into his voluptuous lashes and into his googly royal blue eyes. Perty. "Let me tell you. . .In my OWN way. . ."
"Take me, Cloud!" And uh, we just sorta did. . .stuff. And then um, a little more stuff. It was. . .fun. . . Uh. . . That's the conclusion of my story! END!
Okay, fine. Yeah, you know, I know, we AAAALLLL know that wasn't the story. But hey, I gave it a shot, right? But, here's how it was.
"Aeris?" I could tell it was Cloud from the corner of my eye. I let him approach me while I shuffled through a few things on the desk.
"Yeah?"
"Aeris. . .", he said. "It is time for me to declare my undying love!"
"Cloud, what the hell are you say. . .ing?" Wow, how embarrassing. And odd. It WASN'T Cloud. It was. . . "ZACK?!"
"YES, MY SNOOGIE OOKUMS!", he shouted. "COME AWAY WITH ME!"
"ZACK, YOU PERVERTED JERK WITH THE MIND OF A TREE STUMP!", I yelled. "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING BACK HERE?! YOU SAID YOU'D LEAVE ME ALONE!"
"I NEVER SAID THAT!"
"MY MOM TOLD ME!"
"SHE ISN'T ME, IS SHE?!"
"GOD, I HOPE NOT!"
"WHAT'S THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?! YOU'RE MOM IS HOT! AM I NOT HOT ENOUGH FOR YOU, AERIS?!"
"YOU. . .YOU. . .EEW!", I shouted. "DID YOU JUST SAY MY MOM IS HOT?!"
"Yeah! But more importantly. . .AM I NOT A STUD?!" He posed a few macho shots.
"GET THE HELL OUTTA MY ROOM!"
"AAAWWWWW, AEEERRIIISSS!", he whined. "LLOOOOOVE MEEEEE!"
"NOOOOOOOO!", I screamed. What's his problem?! "GET OUUUUUUT!"
"AAAEEERRRIIIIIIS!" This time he grappled onto my leg, and I don't know whether he was desperate, or whether he was just trying to feel me up. I think it was the latter. I caved. AW, COME ON! SECOND CHANCE, RIGHT?! Or third. . .WHATEVER! And, the poor sad shell of the undead man he was just WON'T leave me alone, so I figured I'd take this to my advantage and show him TO LEAVE ME ALONE ALREADY!
". . .What do you want, Zack?", I sighed.
"AHEM!", he coughed. "Happy birthday!" He handed me a simple bouquet of those yellow roses I loved so much. Hey, not bad. . .WHAT?!
"BIRTHDAY?!", I shouted.
"Yeah!", he said, almost the same way he said it about my mom. Creepy.
"Duh. . Guh. . .Fuh. . .NOBODY TELLS ME THESE THINGS!", I screeched.
"HEY!", he said. "Calm down! You're gonna freak somebody out. . ."
"IT'S MY BIRTHDAY AND I CAN CRY IF I WANT TO, CRY IF I WANT TO, CRY IF I WANT TOOOOOO!" After that statement, it just felt a little weird. "Zack?"
"Yeah?"
"May I please retract that statement?"
"If you marry me or become my love slave.", he said. "GAK!" Hit over the head with my rod. Good for something.
"No way, Romeo."
"Aeris. . ." He looked more serious now, which was really a little awkward now because he was hardly the serious type. "Notice anything peculiar now?" Funny. He was right; there was definitely something odd about right now.
"Well, now that you mention it. . ." I took a few seconds, then spoke. "Nobody else said anything about my birthday. . ."
"RIIIIIGHT. . .", he said. "And, I'm the only one, you know?"
"True. . .", I said.
"So, don't you think I deserve something?"
"Well, I, uh. . ." Great. Another chance? ANOTHER?! How many chances was this again? Well, he came to me on Christmas and I denied him. . .He tried at New Year's. . .But, he never said it was a chance. . .So, this is either the third, or the first. . .Hmph. Maybe the second. God, I should've paid attention in math class. "Sure?"
"AERIS, YOU MADE ME THE HAPPIEST MAN ALIVE!" He paused after that. "Or, um. . .the happiest man on the Planet? I'm not alive, ya' know. . .Until you really, uh, love me and. . .stuff."
"So, what's this chance all about?", I said, cutting to the chase.
"WINNING YOU OVER, MY DEAR!", you said, swooping me over with an arm.
"Haven't you moved on yet?"
"Ah, but Aeris my dear, you are the only woman for me!"
"Why?"
"Because, most of the girls up there on the Planet are really old.", he said, and shuddered. "And don't think they didn't try asking me out. And ANYWAY. . .your mom is hot, but she's married and she's your MOM! Plus, you're more appealing because you're actually ALIVE, AND-
"Zack, let's go before I change my mind. . .", I grumbled. Not only was I hurt that nobody remembered my birthday (DAMN YOU EVIL SHORT TERM MEMORY! DAMN YOU I SAY! So, technically even if somebody DID, I wouldn't know anyway. But hey, nobody mentioned it all day, so I figured. . .), but if he kept ranting on, I swear, I'd either beat him to a pulp with my rod, or I'd run away sick. Really, would you want to go somewhere with a guy who called your mom hot?
"Zack?"
"YES NOW, MY HONEY OAT MUFFIN?!", he shouted.
"Stop that."
"So. . .", I said. It was a little odd from where I was because he had just transported me outside of the town. "Where are we going?"
"WHERE YOUR DREAMS DESIRE, MY LOVE!"
"I TOLD YOU, ENOUGH WITH THE NAMES."
"Yes, Aeris. . ."
"Anyway, where?"
"Like I said, anywhere your dreams desire."
"You're kidding."
"YEAH!", he said. I figured that. "Anywhere you HEART desires!"
"WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE!", I shouted.
"Easy.", said Zack. "Dreams. . ." He motioned to the left with his hand. "Heart. . ." He motioned to the right as he spoke slowly, and repeated.
"I get damn point.", I said, running out of patience.
"GOOD!", he said. "Oh, and here's the beauty of this scheme. . .", he said. "You can go ANYWHERE you want, until you find your true dream!"
"The catch. . .?"
"Once you find it and visit it, you can never return. . .", he said. "And you can't stay there, because as a wise man said, 'You can't live on dreams alone.'. So, your body would continue to starve to death and well. . .We wouldn't want that."
"Yeah. . .", I said. "Now, where ARE we going?"
"Must I keep explaining?", he sighed.
"Zack, you don't honestly expect me to believe that sh-ARE THERE PENGUINS IN NIBELHEIM?!"
"No. . .", he said. "But there is in a place called. . .the North pole. Heh, this world has funny names. Ever believe there's a place called FRANCE here?! AHAHAAAA!" Oh. So Rachel wasn't lying. . .WAAAAAAAIIIIT. FRANCE?!
"FRANCE?!", I shouted.
"YEAH, I KNOW!", he laughed. "AND CANADA!"
"This is. . .Laura and Rachel's world?" He seemed to check a map.
"When traveling through dimensions, always take a map! WOULDN'T WANT TO GET STUCK IN THE DIMENSION OF DISEASED RAT PEOPLE!"
"Can we. . .see this world?", I asked.
"You WHAT?! THIS WAS JUST A SAMPLE! Well. . .if this is what your heart desires. . .Or dreams. WHATEVER!" I took his hand, and he seemed shocked.
"Lead on.", I said. Anyway, wearing a dress is NOT a good idea to do in a place this cold! But the penguins are cute. "Huh?" This puffy bird thing walked up to me. "AWW!"
"AWAY!"
"ACK!" I took the bird with me. Oops.
"HERE WE ARE!"
"Where?"
"Uh. . .Wait, you didn't specify anything, did you?"
"No."
"We're in. . .Singapore." We were in a dank, tiny alleyway, full of hanging laundry.
"Uh. . .I know I didn't desire THIS. . .", I said.
"I HAVE A BETTER IDEA!", he shouted. Floosh! Off again. I still hope I had that puffy thing with me.
"OUCH!" I landed on my bum. "Where now?" It was much more pleasant looking, except for the wild stares they gave us. "Um, did they see-
"No.", he said. "I'm sure they didn't. . ."
"AERIS!", one said. "AERIS!" Suddenly, they began speaking in a frantic language I didn't understand.
"Where are we?", I asked.
"Ikebukuro.", he said. "I was aiming for Tokyo but it seems I was off and landed us here. . .Oh well, Ikebukuro will do!"
"No, it's not even that.", said somebody I understood. He spoke in that accent of the people here, though. "You're in Kyoto!"
"EVEN BETTER!", shouted Zack. "Do you know why-
"They're staring?", said the guy. "You look just like Aeris and Zack from Final Fantasy 7! DOWN TO THE LETTER! Except you.", he said to Zack. "You're mite bit shorter." I heard Zack grumble. "Are you cosplayers?"
"What?" He whispered the meaning in my ear, and I blushed. "Uh. . .no thanks."
"Ah, you'd make a great one. . .", he said. "Uh. . .why do you have a puffin?"
"Is that it's name?"
"It's the species. . ." He picked up the fluffy bird with long nose feathers. "BUT THEY ONLY LIVE AT THE NORTH POLE!"
"GOTTA GO!" I took the bird and ran.
"Man. . .", he said, or at least I could hear him as I ran. "She'd make a damn good cosplayer, hai?"
"HAI!", shouted the other guys there.
"AERIS! OVER HERE!", I heard Zack call. "JUMP!" I did, and landed. . .somewhere. We're not in Kalm anymore. . .
"Where's this? It's so. . .MESSY. . ." I picked up a random book off the floor, titled, "Love Hina." Freaky.
"We're in. . .Rachel's room. . .again."
"Again?"
"Is that you, Rach? Man, isn't Laura supposed to be home already and-!" Some guy came through the door, probably her brother.
"ACK!", I shouted. "MOVE ZACK, MOVE!"
"BURGLAR AND A HOT CHICK!", the guy shouted. But Zack had already taken us somewhere ELSE. "Uh, uh. . .", he picked up a bat off the floor. "I GOT DWIGHT! GET SOME!" We were already gone. "DAMMIT!"
"OW!", I shouted. "Woo. Swirly." We were in that time/space vortex thingy. Creepy when your ex controls stuff like this.
"Making sure there are NO problems whatsoever, tell me. . .", he said, looking at me with MAKO eyes that. . .seemed appealing at the moment. What do you know? Crisis makes me horny. HEY! STOP READING THIS ALREADY! TURN OFF YOUR COMPUTER AND GO, GET SOME FRESH AIR AND MOVE ON WITH YOUR LIFE! "Exactly, where do you want to go?" Behind us seemed to materialize this beach with some structure on the cliff near the shore, with palm trees and a purple sunset sky, with stars just beginning to shine. Wow. Since when did he get so romantic? Oh yeah. He's Zack. That's what sets him apart from Cloud. Aside the HAIR. . .
"This looks fine. . .", I said. "What place is this?"
"A dream of yours.", he said. "Remember?" Oh. Right. This morning's freaky dream. . . HOW DID HE KNOW?!
"Uh, how do you know?", I asked. He was suddenly wearing a suit, and of course, I was in the bikini. Man, why do I always have to end up in this stuff?
"I visited.", he replied. Maybe that's why Zack turned up in it. "Sorry, if I had to invade. . ."
"Just don't do it again. . .", I sighed.
"Here." He helped me up, and began leading me to that building, that was like a huge beach house. "I'm sure you're familiar with this."
So there I was, sitting with a cute guy in a dream vacation spot wearing a bikini that I'm pretty damn sure attracted him, and you know, my body isn't THAT bad (I'm a girl, I'm not totally fine with the way I look, but I'm sure I don't look that bad. . .right?), drinking what I think was chardonnay in a fine crystal glass looking on a perfect white sandy beach with a beautiful starry sky, in a large, lavish beach cabana on a cliff with a view. Something isn't right.
"Why this?", I asked. "I have other dreams, you know?"
"This is the only one I saw. . .", he said with a weak smile. "Do you like it?"
". . .Thanks Zack.", I said. "It's been an okay birthday, I guess."
"An okay birthday?"
"I'm a little put down nobody remember it. I didn't even remember it." He still looked a bit disappointed. "HEY, HEY! I APPRECIATE EVERYTHING, I SWEAR! IT'S GREAT! I-
"I know, I gotcha Aeris.", he said, giving to me a reassuring smile. Why aren't I happy yet? I mean, damn, am I THAT picky?! I'd really hate to think so. . .
"Well. . . In that case, want to go onto the beach?"
"I think we'd have to.", he said.
"Why?", I asked.
"You left that puffin thing down there."
"Hey, this is nice.", I said, picking up the bird off the ground. "Water's good, fuzzy bird thing that's kinda cute, a guy with a six-pack, and this is a date."
"Something's up, isn't there?", he asked. I could only think of one problem, but I didn't want to admit it. There was something still missing, even after all of this. I couldn't tell him.
". . .Nothing!", I said, giving him a smile, which he returned. "What could be wrong?"
"Nothing, as long as you're here.", he said, giving a joking look. Yeah, even through all the perfection of the evening, I could tell, nothing serious was gonna happen. He's a joker, that won't change.
"Thank you very much, Mr. Suave.", I said. "Uh. . ."
"What?"
"What's your last name?"
"It's-
"SQUAWK!" The bird let off a noise, and jumped out of my arms, chasing a crab that was running away from him.
"That's. . .an uncommon one.", I said.
"Hey, I'm from Gongaga. Don't expect anything normal."
"The monsters there are mainly triceratops on tractor tracks.", I replied. "I wouldn'tve guessed anything to be normal after fighting one of those." He stopped walking with me. "What? Is that thing like a mascot for Gongaga or something?"
"I wanted to ask you.", he said. "I really did."
"Ask. . .?" Yeah, you're thinking I'm supremely and utterly dense, huh? Well, I guess I am.
"I remember. You never thought I was serious. I am."
"Serious? You can be but-
"Aeris, why do you think I'm still here for you?!"
"Uh. . ." I was really blank at this moment. "Because you couldn't get any on the Planet?" SEE?!
"I don't need to tell you anything.", he said. FREAKINGOUTFREAKINGOUTFREAKINGOUT. . . "You know my question." Yeah, he pulled out the ring. I got. . .REALLY NAUSEOUS. "Please?"
The waves roared beside me; everything was in order.
"I. . ." ACCEPT! ACCEPT DAMMIT, WHY WON'T YOU RESPOND?! "Can't." NOOOOOOO! WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME?!
"I thought. . .this was your dream.", he said. For some reason, he was seriously crushed. Yeah. I said "for some reason". I didn't think it was me putting him down, because I think he wanted to live, rather than be with me.
"It's not.", I said.
"Then what is?"
"You said you were serious. You weren't.", I replied. "If you were, a ring wouldn't matter."
"But I-
"What matters, is how we feel.", I said. "But, I don't feel this at all. This isn't my dream."
"I saw it myself!", he said.
"My dream. . .", I said. "was with Cloud." It hung in the air. AW FUTZ, NOW WHAT DID I DO WRONG?! AAAAAAAGH!
"It's. . .good.", he said. "Because you can still be here, now that I know it's not your true dream. You could always come back."
"Zack." Time to bash him again. . . "I can always see my true dream, because I eat with him every morning at breakfast." Man, I think I said that skeptically.
"So. . .see your dream." AND FADE! Really, it faded, like in a freaky dream sequence or something. But the next thing I knew, I woke up on my bed.
"Aeris?" Laura walked in. "Dinner!" I grumbled. Watch this be another dream sequence. I'll be forced to waked up every time it gets strange.
"SQUAWK!"
"AAAAAAH!" It was that bird. . .WAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIT. WHY IS IT HERE?!
"PUFFIN!" Rachel immediately bolted in a hugged it. "IT'S SOOOO CUUUUUUUUTE! Oh. WHOOPS!" She set it down. "COME ON!" Grabbing my hand, she pulled me, all the way down the stairs.
"I'm not hungry. . .", I groaned.
"YES, YOU ARE!", she shouted.
"BUT, I'M NOT-
"HAPPY BIRTHDAY!"
"ULTIMA!"
"AAAAAAAAHHHHHH!" I thought they were gonna jump me! SO WHAT IF I TEND TO BE PARANOID?! I COULD'VE SWORN THEY WERE BURGLARS!
"Ouch. . ." Everyone just sorta surprised me for my birthday. . . As much as the plot of this story was WAY predictable, at least I got my thoughts out. And ya' know, I had a good time, blah, blah, blah. . . But here's why I'm telling you all this crap.
"Aeris?" Cloud walked up to me, and if I could've guessed, he was really nervous. "I uh, don't have your present right now, but I uh. . .could give it to you LATER. And I uh. . .sure it will. . .please and satisfy you?"
". . .Fine?"
"GOOD!", he said, looking relieved for whatever reason it was. But wait. Excuse me but. . .I'M GONNA DO IT! I'M GONNA DO IT! AHEM! Thank you.
So, here I am, finishing this up. I'm waiting for him up here right now, and if he doesn't get here soon. . .HE'S DEAD!
"Aeris?" She dropped the pen and slammed the diary shut. 12 pages, full of whatever she was writing. "Your present?"
"Uh, uh. . ."
"Just sit down, while I get it." She sat down, looking pale on her bed. "Close your eyes. . ."
"OH MY GOD, OH MY GOD, OH MY GAAAWWWD!", she thought. He neared, and she almost began to perspire, but didn't because hey, would you wanna do it with a sweaty person? Or, is that the goal? Hey, I'm a virgin, I wouldn't know!
"OPEN YOUR EYES!" She did. And. . .huh? "A BRAND NEW WEAPON ROD! DO YA' LIKE IT?! OW!" She grabbed it, and began hitting him with it. "OW, OW, OW, OW!"
"YOU IDIOT!", she screeched. "DO YOU KNOW WHAT I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR?!"
"A PRACTICE TARGET?!"
"CLOSE ENOUGH!"
"OW!"
"Aeris, have you seen my rod?" Laura walked in, and saw Cloud mashed into a bloody pulp on the ground. "HEY! YOU FOUND IT! But why is it bloody?"
"Ow. . ."
AN3: ::sulking::
Aeris: What's up with her?
Tifa: Her laptop was taken away, so she won't be able to write this story as much.
Aeris: Then why are we even having this conversation?
Tifa: She found where her mom hid it, and now types on it whenever her mom is out. Which is pretty damn often because of work.
Aeris: So. . .?
Tifa: Yeah, okay, we all know writing won't really be slowed as long as her dad keeps his promise of not telling her.
Aeris: Gotta love the man. But uh. . .
AN3: What?
Aeris: Why don't you just kill this god awful story if it sucks so much?
AN3: . . .People seem to like it.
Everyone: large eyes
AN3: WEIRD, ISN'T IT?! HOW COULD SOMETHING SO BAD BE LIKED SO MUCH?!
Rachel: 'CAUSE I'M IN THE STORY!
AN3: No, I'm pretty sure that's not the case.
Laura: It's so bad it's good?
Keo: I endorse it?
Tifa: Men are naturally attracted to me?
Selena: Men are naturally attracted to ME?
Tifa: glares
Selena: smiles
Brad: Uh. . .pass?
Mike: I'm just so kick ass, people MUST love it?
Christina: I'm smart, and even I don't have an answer.
Rachel: mutters Maybe 'cause you're NOT.
Christina: What now?
Rachel: NOTHING!
Cid: Who the hell knows?!
Shera: Want me to check in on it?
Lucrecia: Should I threaten everybody with this death ray and-
Everyone: NO!
Reno: shirtless Isn't it obvious?
Konoshi: looks in mirror EVERYONE LOVES SILVER HAIR AND PINK HIGHLIGHTS WITH RED EYES! AND YAOI!
Set people: stare
Konoshi: What?
Kami: Beats me.
Omega Dragon: What was the question?
Kirokaki: Uh. . .It has chocobos?
Nyow: ALL FF has them. poof!
Mia: changes from Nyow Really? How come I haven't found any so far in FF8? poof!
Nyow: changes from Mia BECAUSE YOU'RE BLIND!
Holly: DUH! CLOUD'S IN IT, AND HE BELONGS WITH ME!
Cloud: backs away
Sadie: shrugs
Sephiroth: shoves Reno aside takes off cloak NOW, isn't it obvious?
Sephy lovers: SWOON!
Surka: HEY! BACK OFF!
Kristi: We have nothing better to do?
Hacker: Easy. We all love stealing stuff off the set. makes off with random prop
Sky: I'm too pretty to be ignored!
Hacker: You STILL look like a hooker.
Cid: hands Sky a 100 gil
Sky: beats him to a pulp
Meagan: I'm not even a character. Why am I here?
Lucrecia: I KNOW! THIS TRACTOR BEAM I MADE! NOBODY CAN RESIST!
Kyoko: Because I'm AN3's friend. PAY ME BACK MY MONEY, DAMMIT!
AN3: sweats
Eternal: eyeing Seph's bum (yes, he's a man.) I know it's evident.
Sephiroth: backs away
Korus: flexes muscle THE LADIES LOVE ME!
Ladies: back away with Sephiroth
Keily: RUUUUUFFFUUUUUUUS! glomps
Rufus: mobbed I'M NOT YOUR BROTHER, DAMMIT!
Keily: HUGS FOR BROTHER! squeezes
Rufus: CAN'T. . .BREATHE. . .
AN3: STOP TRYING TO FIND OUT! IT'S LIKE A TWILIGHT ZONE THING! NOBODY KNOWS, AND NOBODY CARES! But anyway. . .Don't worry, since I have more than one place to write my story, AE will continue. Yes, I know you're all sad and disappointed that it will, but you know, you can always do something else. LIKE, GIVE MORE VOTES, DAMMIT! Really, it matters, and YES, FINE, VOTE FOR YOURSELF! I DON'T CARE! I'M RUNNING OUT OF ENERGY, SO GIVE ME SOMETHING TO DO BEFORE I PASS OUT! THREE MORE VALENTINE'S DAY EPISODES, THEN, WE DO SOMETHING FUN! It involves a tropical island, tribal ideals, desperation, and being stuck. BUT FIRST, YOU VOTE! shakes fist threateningly GO! CHAPTER. . .37 I THINK! NOW!
Rachel: BYE BYE!
Selena: I still think it's me. . .