A.N. Things are starting to live up the rating, will be full PG-13 by next chapter (Mags "moment"). By the way the italics are flashbacks. Wow this is long, my humble apologies. I couldn't end it and I couldn't fit all that I wanted to into this chapter so, yes there is more to come. Lol.

We sat on the bed. It was an awkward moment, I didn't know how to ask my question and she didn't know what I wanted and so she sat looking expectantly at me. Finally I got out a few words somewhere along the lines of "What makes you happy?" She looked at me in a way I've never seen before. It was a mixture of fear, thought, bewilderment and sadness. She considered my question and then she answered

"Lots of stuff, why?" She was puzzled.

I wasn't sure how to answer her. Whatever Riff had me on had suddenly made me want to discuss pleasant things instead of my usual dark thoughts. Whatever "stuff" made her happy was not what I cared about; I wanted to know what the happiest moment of her life was. So I asked her. She once again disappeared into her thoughts, and when she came back to earth she had an answer.

"Before I got here, I was a performer. I worked with a company called Live On Saturday. I used to be kind of in the background for the bigger names, the headliners. I was a good dancer, and I could sing. One day the manager of the company, his name was Robert, told me that he had entered me of all people in the annual Talent Performance Night. This was a huge event for the company, we could usually count on our top dancers to win something and bring a little extra money to the company. You can imagine how I felt, I'd never even been the star of one performance and all of a sudden I was supposed to compete with the top in the state. At first I thought he was kidding, but he showed me the entry form, approved by whoever approved those things that made it official that I was competing only a short month from that date. I worked so hard every day; I couldn't let my company down. It was so classic too, our star girl landed funny on her ankle in practice and she couldn't compete, that left it all up to me. The day of the show I didn't eat anything and Robert had to practically force-feed me so I'd have the energy to dance that evening. Things would have been fine if I could get the ending right....

I stood facing the mirrors in the studio and once again hit the play button on my record player. The music began and I danced almost flawlessly until the last sequence. I spun out of it again and fell on my ass. I heard small applause from the doorway. I turned to see Robert there. He came over and helped me up. Then he hugged me, something he never did to any of the other dancers.
"Hey, stop worrying about it. Think of tonight as the chance you have to show everyone that you really belong on center stage. Be cocky if you have to, don't worry about the outcome, you're a performer so do just that. Perform for the audience, play with them, flirt with them, and bring them into your world. Stop looking at me like I've got three horns on my head. You can do that; I've seen it happen. If anyone you'll suck me in, you always do. You're beautiful to watch, everyone will notice that. Stop practicing before you hurt yourself and you'd better eat something. It begins in an hour."

I was numb, I doubted myself so much the thought of me blowing the whole thing was fully present in my mind. The hour passed so quickly, I don't remember it at all. I was standing in the wings, but Robert wouldn't let me watch. My makeup was done and my costume was on, I looked ready, but I felt totally mixed up. Suddenly the announcer was speaking: "And now, please welcome to the stage our second last performer in the State Dance Talent Search and Competition, I give you Columbia Adan Mckay."

People started clapping and the lights went down. There I was center stage for the first time. The lights came up, Robert gave me a nod but I was frozen. I couldn't think. Numbly I took my beginning pose and waited. I couldn't see the audience but they could see me. The music began and so did I. I wasn't thinking, I don't think I could. Twice I nearly stumbled, but I managed to hang on. The end was coming, step step shuffle step turn spin jump, pose. And it was over, just like a moment dissolved in time I was finished and I hadn't fallen. But it wasn't a perfect performance and I walked off stage disappointed. I looked at the judges' panel to see my score come up as a 9.4. I shrugged and turned around. Robert wasn't there so I watched the last performance. She was good, but she wasn't as clean as the music needed her to be. Her score was a 9.3. At that moment, the wings erupted in cheers. I was soon mobbed by several other dancers from my company along with Robert and the stage manager. I didn't know why, until Robert lifted me off the ground. He set me down and was nearly jumping up and down from excitement. He was yelling, "you won you won, my god you've won!!" I had won, by one tenth of a point.

"So I guess that was it then?" I said.

"No, I mean I was so excited and I was happy, but the really big moment was after the ceremony and the awards presentation. I got to perform again. My happiest moment was when the music ended for the final time and I stood there breathless, in the ending pose that had won me a state prize. I was so proud, it was such an unbelievable and unforgettable experience." She grinned and floated back to that moment. I could see the light in her eyes grow brighter as she imagined her finest moment again.

"What about your family, I guess they were pretty proud too." I was testing the water with that one, I knew she had come here alone and had stayed without regret. I was curious to find out what had happened. The moment the words were out of my mouth the light vanished from her eyes and was replaced by the same cold hard anger she had shown me recently. Then she laughed, but not her usual cartoonish giggle, this was a cold, devoid of emotion laugh.

"You know what Mags", she was looking at me in that mixed emotion way again, "I haven't seen my goddamn family for almost 11 years? I hate them, I ran away when I was 10. I lived with my aunt on my father's side; she raised me. When I was 18 she died, some sort of heart trouble. That's when I came here. I've only ever had to see my parents once after I left and that was to testify against them in court after my aunt filed a case." I shook her head and blew her hair out of her face. She was trying not to cry I could see her struggling to keep her face strait. I changed the subject.

"Umm, what happened after you won, where did you go from there?"

"To be honest, nowhere. That night Robby and I spent this wonderfully romantic time out on the beach and back at his place. You can imagine what happened next." She giggled a little. She had forgotten the previous subject in a hurry. Not that I blamed her. "Anyways", she continued sighing and rolling her eyes, "turns out Robby wanted to "sell" me and my dancing to bring in extra revenue for the company. That wasn't what I was there for and all the terms really did require a lawyer to sort them out. Anyways, I quit. Robby was quite mad, but so was I, I mean he was just gonna use me for money. I'm not a whore, even if this was for dancing. I thought he had feelings for me, but he had set me up. At least I still won that contest fairly. That's why I hum that song", she pointed to her record player, "It's the song I used that night. I've had nearly everything else taken away from me, but no matter what they do, they can't take away my pride, my moment. I was the star, facing the crowd as they all cheered for me."

It was then that she did cry. It was awkward to comfort her; I tried my best. We fell asleep piled erratically on the bed. My last thoughts were of how I was going to tell her my "darkest" secret. I was also very keen on knowing what had possessed her aunt to file a court case against her own brother. I guess not everyone has close family relationships.