New chapter and the weekend! Yay! Go me! Many thanks for the reviews! I love you all, honest. This isn't mine. Bummer.

A Little Less Conversation.

I woke up in the morning curled up on the sofa. I'd chosen not to sleep on the bed, as it smelt of Thingy. And quite frankly my waking world was enough of a nightmare – I didn't fancy disturbing my sleeping one with nightmares of him. I got up and took a quick bath. Today I was going to sort this mess out for once and all. After getting dressed in my own clothes I knocked on the door and heard the door unlocked by my elf guard.

"I wish to speak to the king." I informed him.

"Very well milady. This way if you please."

I nodded and we set off towards Thranduil's study.

***

"I have a problem." I stated as I walked into the room where Thranduil was meeting with his advisors.

Thranduil sighed. "Yes Fangirl?"

"Well you see…" I started.

"Only I am rather busy at the moment." Thranduil stated as he interrupted me. "Planning your wedding."

"Planning my wedding?" I asked startled, "Who the hell gave you the right to plan my wedding?" Thranduil raised an exasperated looking face at me. "Nevermind that anyway. I have something to tell you."

"Indeed?"

"I'm not engaged to the Prince of Mirkwood." I paused. "Vebby never asked me."

Thranduil looked stunned. He was obviously not expecting that.

***

"But you have the ring!"

"Yes." I answered, rather bored by this point.

"The betrothal ring!"

"Yes." I swung my leg back and fore trying to hide my impatience.

"The ring that is the family engagement ring!"

"Yes."

"Given only when betrothed!"

"Yes!"

"And you have it!"

"YES!" I cried sitting up in my chair, exasperated by his endless questions. "We've covered this point, rather extensively I might add, now can we finish with all this wedding nonsense and I can move on."

"Hmmm." Thranduil sank back in his chair. "I will need to discuss this with my advisors. Wait outside."

And with that I was escorted to a chair outside his study where I waited to find out what Thranduil had planned for me.

***

I waited most of the day, various elves rushed in and out of the study; whispering officiously and darting glances at me. Finally I was called back into the room.

"Bring the fangirl back in!"

I got up off my chair and strolled into the study.

"Ahh, Fangirl." Thranduil began. "I am sorry to keep you waiting." He finished without a hint of sincere feeling in his words.

"No problem." I answered; wondering where the hell this conversation was going.

"Thingaladion." Thranduil said turning his head slightly. I turned my head too, there standing in the shadows of the room stood Thingy.

"Marvellous." I muttered under my breath. "What the fuck's going on?"

***

"Youwanttomarryme?!" I blurted incredulously.

"Yes."

"YOUWANTTOMARRYME?!" My voice got higher.

"Yes." The response was slightly exasperated this time.

"YOUWANTTOMARRYME!!!!" I screamed hysterically.

"YES." This time it was forceful.

I took a deep breath. Hysteria would get me nowhere. "YOU." I pointed at him "WANT. TO. MARRY." I paused and then pointed at myself. "ME."

"Yes."

A million questions swirled around my brain. I chose the one that seemed most important. "Why?"

Thingaladion smiled. "I admired you from afar. The moment I lay eyes on you I knew I was lost. But you never saw me. Now I have this chance to ask for your hand…" He trailed off.

I looked at Thingaladion's face and said the only thing that I could.

"No."

***

Thranduil left us alone. He said we needed to 'sort this out'. Turns out that if you're wearing the ring I was wearing then you HAD to marry the heir to the throne. I'd argued that technically I was already married to Vebby (as I had once claimed for a laugh to wind up his then fiancée Sindy) then I'd be committing bigamy if I jumped into any other marriage. Unfortunately it seems that to marry a royal prince properly in Mirkwood you needed the King's consent. Which Vebby and I didn't have. Darn.

I looked at Thingy. "Tell me the truth. Why do you really want to marry me?"

He smirked. "I told you. I love you. Don't you believe me?"

"Honestly? No. The truth if you please."

And then it came out. Seems that Thingy only wanted to marry me to secure his place on the throne. With Thranduil's approval of the two of us there would be no chance of anyone coming back to upset the issue of the next King for example Vebby.

I glared at him. "Do you honestly believe that you can get me to marry you after you've said all that?" I asked.

"You will marry me. You have no choice."

"Don't bet on it." I huffed as I made my way to the door. He grabbed me by the arm and spun me to face him.

"You will marry me!" He hissed as he gripped my arm tighter.

I looked up at him, coldly. "I wouldn't bet on it if I was you." I paused and glanced down at where his hand was still gripping my arm. "And don't touch what you can't afford." I pulled my arm away and marched out of the room.

***

"Time for some action." I commented to myself as I stood in my room. The plans for the wedding where gathering speed. The sooner I got out of here the better. I looked around the room to see if I could find anything to help me in my escape attempt.

I saw nothing. I flounced down onto the bed. "Dammit!" I wailed. "Where the hell is Vebby and why can't he do the whole 'hero-rescuing-damsel-in-distress-thing' right about now? And bloody hell these sheets still stink! What kind of room service do you elves have anyway? What do you wash the sheets in?" I demanded to the empty room, my voice raised in my hysteria. "Essence of Thingy? It's disgusting! I'd rip them up and burn them!"

Then the thought occurred. Rip up the sheets? How about rip up the sheets, tie the ends together and get out the window? Brilliant!

I smirked. I had a plan! I was getting out of Mirkwood and off to find Vebby!

I grabbed my sword and started hacking and slashing the sheets, tearing them into long strips and tying the ends together. Finally my sheet rope was ready and I was climbing out the window, sword attached to my waist with a piece of leftover sheet. I was ready to take on Middle Earth again.

"Let them come." I declared silently to myself. "For I will be ready."

Ready for all that Middle earth could throw at me?

Idiot.

****************************************

Hmm. Jules asked to borrow Vebby's name as it's mine. It ain't I translated Orlando Bloom's name into elvish for it. Yep sad I know – but hey it seemed like a good idea at the time. Cheers individual who suggested it to me. There *phew* 'fessed up. R&R please!