Naruto Primer Lost Chapter: All
Puppies
Kiba, Hinata and Shino were hanging out. They actually wanted to train but Akamaru was missing. "He didn't even tell me where he'd be!" Kiba said. "He's actually been dodging me for a little while! I wonder what's up with him!"
"I'm sure he'll turn up." Hinata assured him.
Just then, Akamaru came stampeding up to Kiba.
"THERE you are, Akamaru!" said Kiba but Akamaru was already barking. "What?" Kiba said, looking dumbfounded. "What?"
Akamaru only continued to bark.
"Akamaru, you're only THREE!" said Kiba.
More barking.
"Yes, I know that in dog years you're twenty-one but that's still too young for you to have CHILDREN!" Kiba said.
"What?" said Hinata and Shino.
"Do you even LOVE this girl?!" Kiba demanded. "Fine, fine. How many?"
Akamaru barked. Then Kiba fainted.
Later, everyone was gathered around in the same area near Kiba who had a cardboard box filled with eleven frolicking puppies that were just a month or so old.
"I don't know what to do with them all!" Kiba said to everyone. "So I want everyone to take a puppy!"
"What?" said everyone.
"Come on!" pleaded Kiba. "It's all Akamaru's fault and I can't take care of them all! I'm sure if you hang out with them for just a little while, you'll see that they're really nice!"
Everyone backed away from Kiba who started sulking.
"I'll try it." said Sasuke suddenly.
"Really?!" said Kiba happily. "That's so nice!"
The group was a little surprised as Sasuke approached the box and looked inside. Sasuke looked at all the puppies carefully and then pointed. "That one." He said.
"No, not that one." Said Kiba. "It has a dirty mouth."
"Oh." Said Sasuke. "Then this one…"
"No, go for a guy puppy. You'll want a guy puppy."
"This one then." Said Sasuke, picking up a black puppy.
"That's a good choice!" said Kiba. "But he needs a name."
"Uh…well…I'll just call him…um…Sasuke." Said Sasuke.
"Oh!" said Kiba. "Sasukemaru."
Sasuke looked a little confused at first, then like he was going to argue, but then he figured it was pointless. "Fine, whatever." He said.
"I'll take a puppy, Kiba!" said Hinata finally.
"You will Hinata?" said Kiba. "I can always count on you!"
"I want one too!" said Sakura. "Come on, Hinata! Let's pick out our puppies together!"
Sakura and Hinata ran up to the puppies and tried to find the two most adorable and precious puppies in the lot, while also trying to get female ones. Finally they chose Cuddles and Precious.
Chouji walked up to the box without saying anything. "Hey Shikamaru!" he said. "This puppy is sleeping. You should take this puppy."
Shikamaru raised an eyebrow. "No, that's all right." He said.
"Let's all get puppies!" said Ino, referring to herself and her team.
"That'll be fun!" said Chouji as he scooped up the sleeping puppy and two other frolicking puppies. "This one will be Shikamaru's. I'll have this one and Ino, you can have this one!"
"No, I'm allergic." Ino said.
"What?" said Shikamaru as Chouji dumped the sleeping puppy in his hands. "Whatever happened to 'let's all get one'?"
Ino shrugged.
"We can just put him back." Said Chouji.
"No you can't!!" said Kiba, jumping in front of the box. "You already picked him up so he's your responsibility!"
"We can both take care of him, Shikamaru!" said Chouji.
"This is so troublesome…" Shikamaru said with a sigh.
"Well, if I'm forced to take one of these puppies, I'm going to hurry and take one of the ones that Kiba said didn't have a dirty mouth!" Naruto said.
"That's a good idea!!" said Lee. Lee ran up to the cage and pulled out the happiest puppy of them all. "I'M NAMING HIM GAI!!" he announced.
"Then I'm going to name mine…uh…" said Naruto as he picked up a random puppy that wasn't the so-called evil one. "How about… Naruto! Yeah! I think this puppy would make a good Naruto Jr.!"
"All right!!" cheered Lee. "Let's all play with our puppies!!"
The only ones that remained were Tenten, Neji and Shino. Tenten shrugged and picked up a puppy from the box. "Neji, take a puppy." Said Tenten.
"No." said Neji.
"Come on!" said Tenten.
"Well fine." Said Neji as he bent down and took the one that didn't have the dirty mouth.
Tenten looked surprised but she wasn't about to say anything. "What are you going to name yours?" Tenten asked Neji. "I'm naming mine Ninenine!"
"Ninenine?" said Neji, raising his eyebrow. "Don't you think that's a little weird?"
"Then what are you naming YOURS?" Tenten asked.
"Biscuit." Neji answered.
"I was expecting something like…" Tenten started. "Well…actually, I just wasn't really expecting Biscuit."
"I used to have a dog named Biscuit." Neji said. "But the Main House killed him."
Tenten looked shocked. "Really?" she said.
"Well, not purposely." Said Neji. "Well…I actually don't even know if it was someone in the Main House but I was taking Biscuit for a walk NEAR the Main House and he got hit by a car so I can only assume that they had something to do with it as some evil plot…well, I don't even think that the person in the car was part of the Hyuuga clan now that I think about it…"
Neji felt like it was his duty to shoot Hinata a dirty look. Hinata quickly looked away and pretended to be interested in Precious.
"Shino, you're the only one left!" said Kiba, grabbing the last puppy and imposing it on Shino.
Shino paused and looked at his puppy. "I have a girl puppy." He concluded. "I'll name her Ladybug."
"See?" said Kiba. "I told you all that you'd want puppies!"
Akamaru started whining a little bit.
"Oh stop whining, Akamaru!" said Kiba. "You know you're too young to have children. It's better this way. They'll get better homes!"
"Now what?" said Chouji as one of the puppies he was holding started to bark a little bit.
Shino looked at Chouji's puppy. "I think your puppy is looking at Ladybug weird." He said. "She doesn't like it. We have to split them up."
"How could you know something like that?" said Chouji.
"You have a mean puppy with a dirty mouth." Shino replied. "I bet he's saying all sorts of nasty things to poor Ladybug."
"You don't KNOW that!" said Chouji defensively.
"Chouji…I hang around with Kiba all day." Said Shino. "I know when a dog is looking at something else weird." Chouji frowned at Shino and put his two puppies on the ground where they could frolic with each other.
"I can already feel my allergies acting up!" Ino said, pulling a tissue out of her pocket. One of Chouji's puppies started running around her legs, wanting a playmate and it's a well known fact that puppies and other small animals are always attracted to the ones that either hate animals or are allergic. "Do you think you could all play with the puppies someplace else?"
"We don't know what to do with the puppies." Said Naruto.
"Shikamaru! Entertain this puppy so he'll leave me alone!"
"Fine…" said Shikamaru as he started snapping his fingers. "Come here, Puppy #2. Come here." Eventually, the puppy came over and Shikamaru starting petting him. "If you give him a calm atmosphere, he'll fall asleep easily."
"But what if he doesn't?" asked Tenten.
"Then it's a mutant puppy." Shikamaru replied.
"I know!" said Lee. "Let's play fetch with the puppies!!"
"I think they're a little young to play fetch." Said Kiba.
"Nonsense!" said Lee as he picked up a stick and hurled it as far as he could. "GET THE STICK, GAI!! GET IT!!"
"Gai doesn't look like he want to play fetch." Said Naruto since Gai was just staring at Lee with his mouth open and his tail wagging.
"Gai is a girl, I hope you know." Said Kiba.
"WHAT?!" yelled Lee. "It doesn't make sense for a girl puppy to be named Gai!" He moped for a bit and then thought up a solution. "Then I shall name her Gaiette!"
Chouji's puppy that wasn't being taken care of by Shikamaru had made its way over to Shino and Ladybug. Shino was tying a bow around Ladybug's ear and brushing her coat lovingly.
"Ladybug doesn't like that puppy." Shino said. "He makes her unhappy."
"You don't even know that for sure." Said Chouji.
"Oh I know it." said Shino.
"No you don't!" said Chouji.
"No, Ladybug genuinely does not like that puppy." Kiba said.
"What?!" said Chouji. "WHY?!"
Kiba shrugged.
"Geez…!" said Tenten as she almost dropped Ninenine. "This dog is evil! He's bitten me three times already!"
"Maybe he just doesn't want to be held." Said Neji.
"I don't want to hold him anyway!" said Tenten as she put Ninenine on the ground. "How's your puppy doing?"
"Um…he's…sitting here." Said Neji.
Tenten looked over at Ninenine who had started growling at the other puppy. "NO, Ninenine! Leave Biscuit alone!!"
"You'd never know that these puppies were all related!" laughed Kiba. Then Akamaru started whining again. "Be quiet Akamaru! You're not old enough to take care of eleven puppies! We've already been through this!"
Sasuke, meanwhile, had run off with his puppy. He was going to teach him tricks and show everyone that he had the best puppy of them all. "Sit!" Sasuke commanded Sasukemaru. "Sit!" Sasukemaru, strangely enough, sat down. "Good dog. Okay…now shake. Shake!" He put his hand out for Sasukemaru to shake. After a moment of waiting, Sasuke picked up the dog's hand and put it in his own. "That's shaking. Remember that."
The other group continued to play with their puppies. "Cuddles is so adorable…" swooned Sakura.
Chouji's puppy ran over to Chouji and wanted to picked up. "My puppy misses Ladybug!" Chouji called, holding his sad puppy.
"Ladybug doesn't care." Shino said, petting his.
"Why don't you let my puppy play with Ladybug?" said Chouji, walking over to Shino.
"I'm bonding with Ladybug." Shino replied.
"Don't be so mean, Shino!" said Chouji. "Ladybug doesn't REALLY hate my puppy! You're just using that as an excuse because you're anti-social and actually don't want to hang out with me!"
"You can say whatever you want, but it still won't change Ladybug's feelings about your puppy." Shino said as-a-matter-of-factly. "Really, Chouji, I have nothing against you or your puppy. I'm sure he's a lovely puppy."
"Tell Ladybug to give my puppy another chance!" pleaded Chouji.
"Ladybug wants nothing more to do with your puppy." Said Shino.
Chouji turned around and started crying on Shikamaru's shoulder. Shikamaru was holding two sleeping puppies and now Chouji was crying on his shoulder.
"Chouji, why are you crying?" Shikamaru asked.
"Because Shino is being mean!!" Chouji cried.
"You shouldn't care." Said Shikamaru. "It's just a puppy. It's not like you're looking to pursue Shino as a friend."
"You're right, Shikamaru!" said Chouji.
Tenten let out a loud groan. "My puppy keeps jumping up!" she complained. "Neji, how did you train your other puppy before he died?"
"It was the Main House's fault." Neji said immediately.
"I thought we already established that it WASN'T the Main House that killed your dog." Lee reminded him.
"Oh right." Said Neji. "Well…it might as well have been."
"You can't just blame the Main House for EVERYTHING!" said Tenten, finally at the end of her rope. Especially since Hinata was standing right there.
"And why not?" Neji asked.
"Because!" Tenten said. "It's just…well, when you really think about it, they're not actually responsible for…er…most of the unhappiness that you've sort of created all by yourself!"
Neji stared at Tenten with this betrayed look on his face. Then he backed away from her.
"Hey, where did Sasuke go?" Ino asked, trying to change the subject.
It was then that Sasuke returned looking smug.
"What are you all smug about?!" demanded Naruto.
"Sasukemaru is a very smart puppy." Sasuke replied. "Watch this. Sasukemaru… who is the best ninja out of everyone?"
Sasukemaru barked in response.
Sasuke looked at Kiba who sighed. "He said Sasuke is." He said.
"Talk about a smart puppy." Said Sakura.
"That puppy is WRONG!" said Naruto.
"Hey, what time is it?" Lee asked suddenly.
"Almost six." Said Sasuke, looking at his awesome ninja watch.
"WOW!!" exclaimed everyone. "NEAT-O WATCH!!"
"Wait, did you say almost six?!" Lee said, getting over his awe. "I was supposed to be home a half an hour ago!" Then he dropped Gaiette with Kiba. "Thanks for letting me play with the puppy! See you later!" Then Lee ran off faster than the speed of light.
"Hey!" said Kiba. "You're supposed to KEEP the puppy!"
"Yeah, I told my mom I'd be home in a minute." Sakura said, putting Cuddles in the cardboard box and leaving. "Bye!"
"You guys are keeping these puppies!" Kiba said.
"I'm not allowed to have pets." Said Chouji.
"Yeah, pets are troublesome." Shikamaru agreed as he put the two sleeping puppies in the cardboard box. Chouji picked up his sad puppy and put him in the box as well. Their entire team left together since they're best friends.
"Why'd you guys lead me into believing that you'd keep the puppies?" cried Kiba.
"I'm not NEARLY responsible enough to actually keep a puppy!" said Naruto dropping Naruto Jr. in the box.
"I'm more of a bug type of guy." Shino confessed. "But I enjoyed Ladybug's company."
"Sorry, Kiba!" said Hinata. "But my dad doesn't like animals."
"And I don't need to give the Main House another opportunity to ruin my life some more." Neji agreed.
Tenten frowned at Neji. "I wouldn't be able to take care of Ninenine."
Pretty soon, only Kiba and Sasuke remained.
Kiba let out a heavy sigh and looked at Sasuke. "I suppose you're going to give Sasukemaru back too!" he said.
"Yeah." Said Sasuke. "I don't have the resources to take care of a puppy."
"I see how it is." Said Kiba sadly as he dropped Sasukemaru back in the box.
"So…what will happen to all these puppies?" Sasuke asked.
Kiba lowered his voice. "Probably to the pound." He replied.
Akamaru barked.
"Akamaru, I can't take care of all these puppies and neither can you!" Kiba said. "It's our only option!" He looked back at Sasuke. "I was planning on putting them back in the same place that I got Akamaru! That way, they'll be bought for sure!"
With that, Sasuke turned around and went back home. Kiba picked up the cardboard box. He and the very sad Akamaru made their way to the nearest pound.