Naruto Primer Lost Chapter: Iruka
Day Spa
"I had this a dream a few nights back where Neji was saving a pack of dolphins from certain doom. Then he was eaten by a shark. I think my dream is trying to tell me that there's a secret vicious love triangle between Iruka, Neji and Kisame. But what do I know?" quoth Link
Iruka is random.
He kind of fizzled out after the first two or three episodes, popping up every once and a while to do some foolish only to disappear a moment later. While he's an amusing character to have fun with and force to frolic and play the Eskimo way, I think he should be able to enjoy his retirement in a more relaxed fashion. So we're sending him to a day spa.
"A day spa?" said Iruka. "Golly gee! No one's ever done something so nice for me before!"
With that, Iruka was sent off to the day spa. Beautiful women whisked him away to be massaged and help him with his relaxation. Iruka could literally ask for no more.
Now, while we COULD go into detail about how relaxing Iruka's day spa adventure was, we will, instead, interrupt his day spa adventure.
Kakashi, Asuma, Kurenai and Gai all crashed through the window while Iruka was right in the middle of getting his facial with the cucumbers on his eyes and everything! The women screamed in terror and ran away as fast as they could like roaches under the light.
"Iruka, watch out!" said Asuma. "This day spa is a secret base for all sorts of evil ninjas just WAITING to catch you off guard!"
"What are you talking about?!" demanded Iruka, taking the cucumbers off his eyes so he could see the perpetrators. "I'm trying to relax! Can't you leave me alone?"
"Iruka, he's right." Kakashi said.
"Why do you think all those women ran away like that?" Kurenai said.
"Because you four just crashed through the window and there are shards of glass everywhere?" Iruka suggested.
"That can't possibly be the reason." Gai said ignorantly.
"All right, that's enough of this." Said Iruka, trying to shoo the four of them back through the window. "Why don't you all head home? If there's any evil ninjas around, I'll make sure to call you."
"But Iruka, you're only a chuunin and couldn't possibly take care of yourself!" said Asuma.
Iruka was about to go crazy with rage when, suddenly, a bunch of evil ninjas dropped from the ceiling.
"HA!" laughed Gai. "How about them apples, Iruka?!"
"Okay, fine!" said Iruka as he jumped behind his four jounin friends. When it came to training piñatas, it offended him to be rescued but when it came to a gang of evil ninjas, he didn't mind having a few protectors.
"Don't worry, Iruka, we're here to protect you." Said Kurenai as she spread her arms out in front of Iruka.
The jounin teachers then engaged themselves in the fight of the century as Iruka only sat by and watched. He started to wonder why someone would send him to a day spa that was run by evil ninjas.
"I thought you guys were just being nice!" whined Iruka. "But you were aiming only to humiliate me!"
Be silent Iruka!