Naruto Primer Lost Chapter: Random Ninjas

The Magical Adventure

We brought you Genma and Hayate's magical adventure. Then we were going to bring you Kotetsu and Izumo's magical adventure. But that would be ludicrous because then we'd be leaving out Raido and Iwashi who are just SO important. So we are going to officially have a "RANDOM NINJA MAGICAL ADVENTURE!!!" How exciting!

I think it's imperative that first we introduce the team to you.

First, we have Genma. He's the NINJA of the group as well as the leader. He's got mad fighting skills and usually takes care of all the important ninja things required in the group.

Hayate is Genma's male lover and we neglected to mention that he's also a ninja. So I guess there's TWO ninjas of the group! Anyway, Hayate, like Genma, takes care of all the important fighting things that ninjas usually take care of. He's a JOUNIN, just like Genma!!

SILLY US! We also forgot that Kotetsu is the ninja of the group too. Kotetsu is also the CRAZY one too and makes sure that everyone in the group is having fun!!

Izumo…well, I guess he's the ninja too. Izumo is the HEART of the team and, while he does kill people on occasion, he can be viewed as the nice one. He and Kotetsu are both chuunins.

Iwashi is a chuunin as well, which means he's also a ninja, but that doesn't mean he can't pack a punch! He and his little pointy beard will conquer all that oppose him.

Then there's Raido. Even though his face is kind of melting off, don't let him frighten you away because he's also a nice guy. Mind you, not as nice as Izumo! And Raido's the ARCHER!! Every team needs and ARCHER! Wait…no, never mind. He's also a jounin ninja. I guess they're ALL ninjas! Hence the name "Random Ninjas" I guess.

So anyway, these six random ninjas composed of three chuunins and three jounins often perform good deeds and triumph over evil.

Hayate, Iwashi, Izumo, Kotetsu and Raido were all waiting outside one day for Genma to come out with their mission.

"What do you think we'll have to do today?" Iwashi asked his pals.

"I hope it's something exciting!" said Kotetsu.

"Oh, Kotetsu, you're so crazy!" said Izumo.

"I agree." Said Raido. "Our missions as of late have been really low key and rather boring."

"Hey, here comes Genma." Said Hayate as Genma came walking out of the Hokage building with a paper in his hand. He looked distressed. "Genma, what's wrong?"

"Well…I'm sure you've all come to realize that our missions have been progressively getting more appropriate for new genins…" Genma said. "Well… just look at this!"

He handed the paper to Hayate who took it and coughed.

"It's a statement declaring that from now on, all the important missions will be completed by important characters!" Hayate said.

"GASP!!!" gasped everyone else except for Genma who had already reacted a while ago and Hayate who had just said it.

"Now we're dealing with D-rank missions." Said Hayate sadly.

"This is an outrage!!" said Kotetsu. "I REFUSE to stand for this!"

"There's nothing we can do." Said Izumo. "We're not important enough to start an uprising."

"Yeah, especially me." Said Iwashi.

"You can't expect us to just roll over and admit defeat!" said Raido passionately.

"Raido and Kotetsu are right!" said Genma. "Something has to be done!"

"But what?" asked Hayate.

"Well…let's try to think of our random abilities and use them in the best way we can…" said Kotetsu, rubbing his chin. "For example, I use quite possibly more hair gel than anyone else in the entire village!"

"AND we can use our genjutsu to make ourselves look like genin." Said Izumo, looking at Kotetsu with an annoyed expression.

"Oh right." Said Kotetsu. "I guess that's more important."

"I'm the best at contracting the common cold." Said Hayate, coughing.

"I'm really good at tying knots, especially if it's for a handkerchief around my head!" said Genma, pointing his finger up in the air.

"I'm the Hokage's bodyguard so I know lots and lots of secrets about the Hokage and have access to all the missions and stuff." Said Raido with a shrug.

"My pointy beard sometimes has a mind of its own!" said Iwashi.

"Um…okay!" said Kotetsu. "This is a start."

"How can we use all these abilities to make ourselves known?" said Genma, rubbing his chin.

"Let's use our genjutsu to look like genin and then go into the Hokage's building where all the mission scrolls are." Said Izumo. "We can switch around the labels so the D-rank missions are actually the A-rank missions so we'll be given those instead of the important characters. Then we can tie up all the important characters with my mad knot tying skills and infect them all with the common cold!!"

They paused.

"And then…Iwashi's beard can…MAYBE do something…" Izumo finished.

"That's a great idea!!" said Raido.

"Wait right there." Came a voice behind them. They all turned around to see Aoba standing there.

"Aoba!!" gasped Kotetsu. "Did you hear our totally unprovoked plan?!"

"Yes." Aoba said.

"I suppose you're going to tell the Hokage then…" said Hayate.

"No, I'm not." Aoba said. "Though I am by far the coolest and best dressed ninja in the village, I am also a random ninja as well, just like the rest of you. So I would like 'in' on your plans."

"You got it!" said Genma as he put his hand out. Hayate put his hand on Genma's, then Aoba, then Raido, then Kotetsu, then Izumo, then Iwashi and then anyone else whom I may have forgotten.

"Ready?" said Iwashi.

"READY!!" yelled everyone, including Iwashi. They all jumped into the air and cheered.

Almost immediately, Mission Impossible music started playing as they morphed themselves with genjutsu to look like genin. It was so precious!

"All right, everyone follow me!" said Raido.

The group of seven sneaked into the Hokage's building, going mostly undetected. Not only did they look like helpless little genin who couldn't possibly be plotting anything, but they were RANDOM helpless little genin who couldn't possibly be plotting anything. So all the important characters that might have crossed their paths were completely unsuspecting.

They made it into the secret mission storing room. Raido pulled the missions out of a drawer and opened them up.

"Here are the D-ranks, and here are the A-ranks." He said.

"Wait, let's think this through first." Said Hayate. "This could potentially be really dangerous if we get assigned these important missions, especially a few of you who are only chuunins."

"Are you saying that being a chuunin is a bad thing?" said Kotetsu, getting all in Hayate's face.

"On an A-rank mission, yes." Hayate said.

"We chuunins don't have to take this sort of abuse!" said Kotetsu, grabbing Izumo and Iwashi.

"Hey, we don't want any trouble." Said Iwashi quickly.

"We jounins outnumber you chuunins!" said Aoba. "Not to mention we're jounins and you're only chuunins."

"See?" said Kotetsu. "I told you this would happen eventually! They couldn't keep it inside them anymore! All you jounins are alike! All you want to do is put us chuunins down just because we're chuunins and not jounins!"

"Hey, hey, let's not fight." Said Genma in that Sonic the Hedgehog tone. "We all have to get along and work together."

"I didn't mean to start anything." Hayate said.

"Are we switching these are not?" Raido asked.

"Yes!" said everyone else. "Switch them!!"

They weren't interrupted because the only people that would potentially interrupt them would be random unimportant ninjas. And, since all the random unimportant ninjas were currently performing evil deeds, there were no random unimportant ninjas to interrupt them.

They could hardly withhold their childish giggling as they crept out of the mission storage room after switching the labels.

Suddenly, they bumped into someone who was just glowing with importantness.

"Why, hello there." Said Kakashi, looking down at the seven disguised random ninjas.

"Hello, Kakashi!" said Genma, stepping in front. "We're just seven random genins frolicking about and we're most certainly not up to no good and you're crazy to think we are!"

"Okay." Said Kakashi. He walked past them on his way to the mission storage room.

"He knows…" whispered Izumo.

"How could he?!" said Raido. "There's no cameras or anything in that room so there's no way he'd be able to know!"

"What are we going to do?!" said Kotetsu. "He recognized us!!"

"I never should have agreed to this!!" said Aoba, fretting.

"Everyone, you need to calm down." Said Hayate. "He didn't recognize us and he doesn't know."

"You're right, lover." Said Genma. "Let's just get out of here before he starts to suspect anything."

Then Kakashi came out of the mission storage room holding a bunch of scrolls.

"Er…" said Kotetsu as Kakashi walked by them. "Where are you going with those scrolls?"

"To the Hokage." Said Kakashi. "It's time to hand out missions." Then he walked away.

"You hear that?" said Iwashi after Kakashi was out of earshot. "It's time to hand out missions so that means they have no idea what we did!"

"Let's turn back to our regular selves and receive missions like we USED to!" said Raido enthusiastically. They all dispelled their genjutsu and turned back to normal. Then they sprinted off to the Hokage's room where he was looking through the scrolls.

"Oh!" said the Hokage. "Just the seven men I was looking for. I have a very important A-rank mission that needs a team composed of four jounins and three chuunins."

"Wow!" said Aoba. "That MUST be an important mission!"

"Let's have a look-see." Said the Hokage, opening up the A-rank scroll. "Oh and by the way. I have heard that there have been some reports of a few troublesome children posing as me and handing out missions to people that were incorrect so if you have received any D-rank missions lately, then that's why. Anyway, let's look at these A-rank missions…"

He peered at them as the random ninjas looked at each other anxiously.

"Hm…" said the Hokage. "This sure is strange. I guess there wasn't a mission that required your assistance. All these missions appear as though they're genin work…"

"Uh…" said Genma quickly as he approached the Hokage. "Oh! Mr. Hokage sir! Look at this! They're labeled incorrectly!"

The Hokage looked at the two scrolls and laughed. "So they are!" he said. "That would have been disastrous! Ah, here we go. Here's your correct mission."

He handed the seven a paper with the details of the mission scribed down on it. Then the seven ninjas thanked the Hokage and left the building as quickly as their legs could carry them.

"I guess we all learned a valuable lesson from all this." Said Izumo.

"What's that?" Kotetsu asked.

"Um…" Izumo said. "Well…I don't exactly know how to phrase it in a fancy proverb so that it makes sense, so I'll just state is clearly. If something happens that makes you feel a little sad or skeptical, it's important that you talk it over with the person who is the cause of your unhappiness instead of blindly doing something that might inevitably cause MORE unhappiness!!"

"That is a mouthful." Said Raido with a nod.

"How about we just say that the lesson of today is just, 'Don't judge a book by it's cover' again?" suggested Iwashi.

"That too!" said Izumo.

Then they all winked and put their thumbs up.