Disclaimer: Everything belongs to the amazing J.K. Rowling. I own nothing but the plot.

A/N: OMG you guys!! 105 reviews! You ROCK!! Thank you to everyone who reviewed :) This chapter is extremely long, I think. It was 13 hand written pages and took me about 4 hours to write. Whew! And it's chapter 8!!! My favorite number!! Hehe. Enjoy.

Also, I just wanted to say that irregardless' isn't a word. I used it last chapter and then my mom informed me that it wasn't a word. And I didn't believe her, so I looked it up in the dictionary and two thesaurus's - and alas, it was not there. No wonder the spell checker highlighted it, but I just ignored it lol. Yea, whatever, just go read the chappy....



The Pain Within
Chapter 8: Explanations



Draco turned (painfully) back on to his left side to face his visitors.

Professor Dumbledore, Professor Snape!

They stared at him expectantly while he fiddled with the blankets.

I can - err, explain.

Good. Please do, Snape told him curtly. The teacher watched as a wave of apprehension and fear passed over the boy's face before the normal blank mask took over.

I was angry and I went to far, I suppose. It won't happen again.

Snape snapped at the statement. You suppose?!? If I hadn't found you when I did, Mr. Malfoy, you would already be dead.

I'm not suicidal, Professor, Draco told him firmly.

Well that's bloody reassuring after you slice your arm up like that.

Severus, calm yourself, the Headmaster intervened. Severus took a deep breath and sat down in one of the chairs near the bed. The Headmaster turned a calculating eye on Draco. What, Mr. Malfoy, could make you so angry that you felt it necessary to cut yourself?

Draco froze. He couldn't tell the truth. He needed a good lie, but his mind was empty. Where were his cunning Slytherin skills when he needed them? Staring at the floor, he put on his expressionless mask again and glanced up at them. And shrugged.

Dumbledore raised an eyebrow. You don't know?

Draco shook his head. Okay, so being inarticulate wasn't one of his best plans. Sue him. There was no way he would let that old man know the true reason.

I see. Dumbledore eyed him doubtfully for a moment before standing. Well, Mr. Malfoy, if there is anything you wish to talk about, I am sure you will be able to find me. I owled your parents earlier and they are on their way. I am going to wait for them in the front of the school. Feel better soon. Good day, Severus.

The Potions Master, who had been silent and motionless since his outburst, nodded mutely. The Headmaster slipped between the curtains, leaving the teacher and his student to their thoughts.

Draco softly sighed. Just what he needed - his parents seeing him in this condition. Lucius would be enraged while Narcissa would be worried. He closed his eyes, wishing he had never gotten himself involved in this mess.

Meanwhile, Severus remained passive, closely observing the teen. He had been watching him throughout the length of the conversation. The boy liked to believe he was ice personified but now and then little drops of emotion melted off. Such as the hesitation when he was asked to tell what happened, or the panic when asked why it had happened, and even the alarm at the mention of his parents. These small flickers of feeling would go unnoticed by most people, but to a perceptive person like Severus, were quite obvious. In his mind he mulled over what he knew about Draco's situation and added the briefly displayed emotions, trying to link things together. He stared at the boy as if willing him to explain everything. Of course he didn't; the battered teen continued to lie there with his eyes closed.

Something in the man's mind stirred as he stared at the bruises; he suddenly vividly remembered a former Potions class. Which there were a lot of, considering he instructed the class. Nevertheless, he recalled the day he had taught his sixth years how to brew a Concealment Potion. It had been a difficult task for all of them. Well, most of them...

That's why you knew how to brew the Concealment Potion.

Draco's eyes popped open in shock.

To hide all those bruises, I mean, Snape stated.

The blond said nothing and looked at the ground. What was there to say? He couldn't exactly deny the statement, for he didn't have another to counter against it.

Snape continued, the only question is, how did they get there?

was the mumbled reply.

Snape started, dropping his voice to an almost gentle tone, I find it hard to believe that Quidditch caused that amount of injuries without a single visit to Madam Pomfrey.

Draco fixed him with a steely gaze. Are you calling me a liar?

I was merely stating that I thought your answer to be very improbable.



Snape was not a patient man.

Well what?

Severus rolled his eyes. Draco, don't play stupid. Tell the truth.

About what?

He had seen the teen play this game when he was younger. the black haired man warned. Tell me where the bruises came from. Tell me why you deliberately cut your arm. Tell me what you're hiding. Just tell me something, dammit! He glared relentlessly at the boy, who just stared smugly back. Maybe you should tell me what goes on at home.

Some of Draco's confidence faltered but he still managed to raise a blond eyebrow. What are you suggesting? he asked, trying unsuccessfully to keep his voice even so that it trembled slightly.

Snape smiled inwardly at the nervousness. Maybe if he unnerved the boy enough, he would admit the truth.

I'm not suggesting anything, he answered placidly.

Yes, you are, Draco spoke icily, blue eyes glazing with anger. Or was it fear that someone may have discovered the truth. You're trying to imply that my -

He stopped abruptly when a flurry of footsteps and murmuring resounded through the infirmary, obviously coming closer to his bed. Forgetting Snape and his accusations Draco shot a panicked look at the curtain before it opened. Once it was pulled back and two figures stepped into the small area though, a passive look replaced it.

Draco sweetheart! Are you okay? We left as soon as we received Headmaster's owl.

Draco sat up and managed a small smile as his mother instantly attached herself to him. I'm fine now, Mum, he said into her hair. The fragrance was familiar and comforting - fresh peaches.

She pulled back, tears in her eyes, and held his hand. You had me so worried, I feared the worst. Thank goodness you're okay, I would have been beside myself! she said. Snape realized she said me' and I' instead of us' or we'. Interesting.

I'm so sorry, Draco whispered. He truly felt guilty for causing his mother to feel so distraught.

Oh, honey, it's okay. Whatever is wrong, I - we, she glanced at her husband, will help you through it, alright?

He nodded and she gently kissed him on the forehead. He didn't seem at all embarrassed by the coddling. Narcissa looked appreciatively at her former classmate before turning back towards her son and smiling somberly.

I don't even want to imagine what would have happened if Professor Snape hadn't found you in time.

Lucius cleared his throat. Yes, thank you Severus, he finally spoke. The Potions teacher nodded. Lucius glanced at his son. It was good you found him before something...tragic occurred.

Draco slowly lifted his eyes until he met his father's irate grey ones. They gleamed with nothing but cold fury and pure unadulterated hate. Draco was glad he wasn't home; he was positive he would have been ruthlessly murdered by now.

Snape noticed how the younger Malfoy visibly flinched under his father's intense gaze. He also noted the stiff formality and sadistic edge of the elder's voice. He needed no more evidence than this.

I would have been deeply troubled if a fatal tragedy struck one of my star pupils, Lucius. Especially my good friend's son, Severus told Lucius, watching as a flash of disdain passed over the blond man's face as the word son' was said. He was clearly disgusted by his son's situation.

However, along with the severe cuts on his arm and hands, Madam Pomfrey is worried about the fading bruises and how they got there.

I told you Professor, they're from Quidditch. It's a rough game and I tend to bruise easily, Draco jumped in hurriedly.

Yes, and you're terribly clumsy. You walk into objects like a bumbling drunk all the time, Lucius added.

Is that so? Snape questioned, knowing for a fact that Draco was a very coordinated person.

Yes, it is. Isn't it, dear? Lucius asked his wife pointedly.

Narcissa gave Severus a resigned look before reluctantly nodding. Lucius smiled thinly.

I see, Severus nodded, Even so, some bruises are questionable. For instance, his eye. It looks like someone punched him, he said in a low hostile voice while staring Lucius in the eye.

Draco's heart thumped in his chest. Snape had definitely gone too far. The worst thing was, he would get the brunt of his father's anger even though Snape was the one that pissed him off.

Lucius's eyes widened in rage. How dare you? he snarled. What are you implying?

Severus shrugged his shoulders as he stood his ground. I am not implying anything, Lucius. He looked at Draco and nodded at Narcissa before leveling his gaze with the man he once considered a friend. I am sure you and your wife would like to speak with Draco privately, Lucius, so I shall leave you to it.

As soon as the curtain stopped rustling signifying Snape's exit, Lucius turned a stony glare on Draco. What the hell did you tell him?

Draco's eyes widened. I didn't tell him anything. Maybe he just figured out what a bastard you are and put two and two together.

Then why does he suspect that I gave you that black eye?

I d-don't know.

You better not be lying, Lucius warned him.

I'm not! his son insisted.

Lucius frowned at him skeptically. His eyes roamed to Draco's bandaged arm and hands. He raised his eyes to meet a pair of defiant sky blue ones staring back.

You selfish, ungrateful little bastard, he spat.

Narcissa scolded only to be silenced with a scornful sneer.

After all I've done for you, and given to you, you try this. You go and try to kill yourself. Is that how you show gratitude to your father? Haven't I taught you better?

Lucius, that's enough! He's already hurt enough to attempt suicide, don't add to his problems, Narcissa pleaded.

It wasn't suicide, Draco stated. I was just-

Like hell it wasn't! You were planning to bleed to death. And tell me, why did you choose to rip open your left arm? Hmm? Lucius exploded.

Lucius, please, keep your voice down!

He glowered menacingly at his wife. Narcissa, shut the bloody hell up!

Draco watched angrily. Don't speak to her like that! She was risking a lot to talk back to Lucius like she was and Draco was not going to let him brush her off like a piece of flint.

Silence engulfed the room as Lucius stared down his son. His lip curled into a malicious sneer. I thought I told you not to tell me what to do, he growled, lifting his arm to slap his son. Draco squeezed his eyes shut waiting for the blow, but it never came. Narcissa grabbed Lucius's arm with both her hands.

Not here, Lucius Malfoy! she told him vehemently. Draco stared at her; she never stood up to him like that. The consequence was usually too harsh. Besides what would they think if they saw a fresh bruise moments after we leave? Severus would be even more suspicious, she said trying to reason with the angry blond man.

Lucius lowered his arm while glaring begrudgingly at his wife. Unfortunately you are right, Narcissa, he admitted before leaning in close to Draco. But just wait until Christmas when you come home. I will show you no mercy, you nasty son of a bitch, he hissed viciously. He stood up and smoothed his robes.

Don't try any more funny business. Or else, he threatened as he walked towards the curtain. Come Narcissa. I have to pack for my business trip tomorrow.

One moment. I want to say good-bye.

Lucius rolled his eyes. Fine, but I can't stand the sight of the evil shit anymore so I will wait for you in the Entrance Hall.

With a swish of his cloak, Lucius Malfoy exited the little area and mother and son listened as his footsteps retreated and they heard a door shut. Narcissa looked back at her son.

You shouldn't have done that. He's going to be brutal later, Draco told her.

It's okay, I'm used to it, she said sitting down on the side of the bed and pulling him in for a hug. I'm so sorry Draco, she whispered.

It's okay Mum. It's not your fault, he told her.

She looked down at him, shaking her head. She raised his fully bandaged left arm and asked, What happened, honey?

Draco lifted his head and shrugged. I was just mad, that's all. I don't want to die, honest. I was going to clean everything up but I passed out before I found my wand.

Narcissa frowned in concern. You were angry enough to injure yourself? That worries me.

The blond teen hung his head and mumbled something incoherent.

What was that?

I wanted it gone, he whispered. I wanted it off; it to just vanish. It repulsed me. It's a revolting symbol really. And now I can't see it anymore because there are too many cuts and that's the way I want it.

But no matter what you do, no matter how many times you cut your arm, the Dark Mark will never cease to exist, Mr. Malfoy. It is branded into your skin. It cannot disappear.

Narcissa and Draco looked up to see Severus Snape standing at the foot of the bed. Draco turned his head away in shame while Narcissa hugged him more tightly.

I have to go, baby. Your father will be in even rarer form if I keep him waiting too long.

was the barely audible reply.

I love you, and please don't do anything like this again. You scared me to death.

I won't, Draco promised.

She stood and gave him a bright smile. Good-bye sweetheart. Owl me if you need me.

I will. Bye Mum, be careful. Love you.

Narcissa, I will escort you to the Entrance Hall. Draco, I suggest you get some rest.

He obeyed and settled himself under the blankets as he watched his teacher and mother leave. Once they were gone, he rolled over and silently cried himself to sleep.


Narcissa and Snape walked side by side towards the front hall. It reminded them of their school days when they and their group of friends roamed the castle or thought up Slytherinly evil pranks to play on the Marauders. Those were the days.

He's still a terror as I heard tonight, Severus sighed.

Yes, unfortunately, Narcissa said. I thought it was just a childhood temper that he would lose once we were out of school. But we've been married for over sixteen years and he hasn't changed yet. In fact, he's gotten worse.

Snape stared at the floor. I didn't realize he was so cruel.

Narcissa chuckled sardonically. Welcome to my world. She stopped. Oh Severus, what am I supposed to do? He's destroyed me and my life; I'm used to it by now. There's nothing I can do. But he's destroying my son! I can't stand for that; he constantly hurts him, and now has forced him to become a Death Eater. It breaks my heart to see him abuse Draco and I'm completely useless in stopping him. I feel helpless, she said in a small voice.

Severus closed his eyes. We'll figure something out, I promise Narcissa. We're Slytherins after all.

She smiled a bit.

They continued walking. One more corner and they would be face to face with Lucius Malfoy.

I think you'd better walk the rest of the way yourself, he said quietly.

She nodded.

Owl me if you need anything. In the meantime, I'll try to work something out, okay?

Narcissa smiled sadly. Thank you.

No problem. And I mean anything. Just owl me.

I will, she said as she disappeared around the corner.

Severus Snape watched her go. He remembered her from their Hogwarts days; a carefree, fun-loving girl. Her eyes used to always sparkle with a mischievous Slytherin glint. Now they emitted defeat and loneliness. He was going to do whatever he could to help her and Draco; neither deserved what they put up with. Lucius Malfoy would get what was coming to him.





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Heh heh. Watch your back Lucius Malfoy!! Mwa hahahaha. Ahem. Okay, I don't know why, but this chapter irks me for some reason. There were so many different ways I could have written this chapter, and it was difficult to choose. I also used a lot of words over and over because I couldn't think of any other way to write them. Ehh, oh well. Now it's your turn. Work your reviewer magic! Go!! Go!! Please?