Naruto Primer Lost Chapter: All
Heated Competition
This chapter was suggested by one of our loyal reviewers; Rashaka, and I'm so glad that we found a good use for it! Enjoy! (And with this chapter, the Lost Chapters are officially LONGER than the Naruto Primer!! And still with 6 chapters to go! HURRAY!!)
"I hardly think that an art contest is going to help settle the dispute of who is the best ninja among us." Grumbled Neji as the teachers presented the group of twelve (yes, Shino and Naruto came back) to a room that had all the art supplies anyone would ever need or want.
"You have NO idea!" laughed Gai.
"Obviously I don't." Neji said, looking extremely evil.
"I get to be the unbiased median again!" Iruka said excitedly, pointing his finger up in the air.
"All right!" said Kurenai. "The rules are as follows! Make something artsy and whosever is the best is officially the greatest ninja here!"
"Next to Shikamaru of course." Asuma said. "He's automatically the best because…" Asuma trailed off and then chuckled warmly. "Well, I guess you all know why!"
Asuma received a few evil looks from his fellow teachers. Even from Iruka who was getting a little tired of hearing about it and getting absolutely no recognition as being another one of the Great Shikamaru's teachers who aided him in his quest to chuuninhood before everyone else.
"How long should we give them?" questioned Kakashi.
"An hour?" suggested Kurenai.
"I hardly think an hour is enough time to thoroughly complete a work of art that is to be judged!" exclaimed Sakura, knowing exactly what she was going to paint.
"TWO hours." Gai said.
"An hour and a half." Asuma said. "I am FAR to impatient to sit around and wait for these students of ours to paint a picture!"
"Well…we could go and…do something…" thought Kurenai out loud.
And then a bus drove by. An old man came out of the bus and started dancing around crazily like a fool to some insane music.
"LET'S GO TO SIX FLAGS!!!" cheered the teachers as they piled on the bus and then it drove away.
The students stood there and stared at where the bus used to be.
"Okay…so they force us to end our tournament early, do an art contest and now they're going to Six Flags?" said Sasuke, looking slightly baffled.
"Guys, Six Flags is not all that cool." Said Tenten. "We're too short for any of the rides anyway."
"How about we just forget about this art contest and finish our tournament?" Neji suggested, really only concerned about SASUKE'S consent.
"Oh that's all right," said Sasuke as he started looking at the little paint bottles. "We don't need to fight. Let's just assume that I won and leave it at that. That way, the outcome is the same except you don't have to be beat up."
Neji would have retorted with a witty reply, but the problem was that he couldn't think of one. He was just so in shock that anyone would even THINK of saying something like that to him, let alone say it out loud. So he could only stand there with his eyes wide and his mouth gaping open as everyone else cleared their throats and went over to their own little easels.
"Hey Kiba!" said Naruto, dipping his two index fingers in red paint and then smearing it on his face. "I'm YOU!"
"HA!" laughed Kiba. "You think just THAT will make you me?"
"Yeah." Said Naruto.
For some reason, that made Kiba fume. "Well I'll show you!!" he said as he dipped his hands in some black paint and making three lines on both his cheeks. "See? Now I'm YOU."
"I don't have red things on my face." Naruto pointed out.
"Fine." Said Kiba. "I'm you being me."
"You wish." mumbled Naruto.
"Kiba, you have paint on your face!" Hinata said.
"I know!" said Kiba, turning to Hinata. "I'm being Naruto being me!"
"What?" said Hinata, looking confused.
"Don't worry, Hinata." Said Kiba. "It's kind of a guy thing."
"Oh." Said Hinata with a nod. She turned back to her picture, which was currently a hill. She was just in the middle of drawing the house that would go on that hill when she had been distracted by the paint on Kiba's face and had to be sure that he knew it was there so he wouldn't be embarrassed when he got home, looked in the mirror and then realized that there had been paint on his face all day!! AHHH!!
So then she took a deep breath and turned to Shino who was on the other side of her. "What are you painting, Shino?" she asked.
Shino looked at Hinata and then angled his painting so that she could not see it.
"Oh." Said Hinata. "It's going to be a surprise?"
Shino only adjusted his sunglasses.
"Hey, Shino, that's a good idea!" said Tenten. Because Shino had angled it away from Hinata, he had accidentally given Tenten a clear and open view of what he was painting. "I was really stumped about what I should paint but your painting inspired me!"
Shino, once again, didn't say anything.
"What is it?" Lee asked Tenten.
"Oh, just a little something special!" Tenten said. "I don't want the spoil the surprise!"
"Well, I'M painting a life size portrait of GAI!!" said Lee, turning his easel around to show that he was, in fact, doing exactly what he had mentioned.
"That's a little excessive." Tenten said uneasily.
"It will look MARVELOUS!" said Lee.
"Hmph." Said Neji.
"HEY!!" yelled Lee, springing up and pointing dramatically at Neji. "Is there something you want to say?!"
"Lee, if you want to sway the judges then you should draw a life size portrait of Iruka." Neji answered.
"I'm not doing that!!" yelled Lee, insulted.
"Right, Lee." Said Neji, going back at his own painting, which was an angsty bird in a cage. Or at least, the makings of an angsty bird in a cage. Of course, no one was really going to say anything about Neji's angsty bird in a cage because not only were they not in the mood with him being offended, but they also didn't want to have to listen to an hour-long rant about the Main and Branch Houses.
"I am simply STUMPED as to what I'm going to paint, Shikamaru!" said Chouji who was, for an inexplicable reason, sitting next to Neji. He was probably sitting next to Neji because there was an empty seat next to him and Shikamaru had just so happened to put himself where he had. Chouji just had to sit next to Shikamaru. "What are you going to paint?"
"I'm not going to paint anything." Shikamaru answered.
"WHY?!" said Chouji, sounding shocked.
"Because Asuma said I've already won ANYWAY and it's too troublesome to paint a picture for no reason." Shikamaru replied honestly.
"I bet you wouldn't have painted a picture even if Asuma hadn't already said that you won!" said Ino.
"That might very well be true." Said Shikamaru with a shrug. "But we'll never know now."
"Shikamaru, you are so lazy!" said Ino with an exasperated sigh.
"I know." Said Shikamaru, sounding rather annoyed. "And even if I hadn't known it for myself, I would have you to repeatedly tell me over and over on an hourly basis."
"Maybe if you weren't so lazy then you would be able to produce a work of art that rivals that of the one I'm about to create!" Ino said, showing her makings of a beautiful portrait of Sasuke.
"You call THAT a beautiful portrait of Sasuke?!" demanded Sakura, leaning over and gaping. "That's hardly worthy of being in the same room as Sasuke!"
"Like you could do any better, Sakura!" said Ino.
"As a matter of fact, I COULD!" said Sakura, showing HER painting to Ino which was also the start of a portrait of Sasuke.
"THAT'S Sasuke?" laughed Ino. "It looks more like ROADKILL!"
Both of their paintings were hardly started and therefore it was impossible to distinguish at this early time whose was better among the two but now they were competing.
"Sasuke, you're on my side, aren't you?" said Sakura, leaning over to Sasuke who was trying to get the yellow paint open.
"What?" he said as he cap popped off.
"What are you painting?" Sakura asked.
"I don't know." Said Sasuke. "A sunflower maybe."
"A sunflower?" Sakura asked, looking slightly confused.
"I like sunflowers." Sasuke said, eyeing her.
"Oh, there's nothing wrong with that!" said Sakura.
"Got any witty remarks, Naruto?" Sasuke said, turning to Naruto. But then he decided against it and slowly scooted away from him. Naruto and Kiba were pretty much head to toe covered with paint, looking as though their main goal was to paint themselves and not their papers. Sasuke seriously had to evaluate his seating decision.
Neji figured now was a good time to take a break from his angsty bird painting. He had finally come up with a good retort to Sasuke's totally out of line comments concerning Neji's fighting ability.
He started walking around the circle to where Sasuke was seated but, on the way, he happened to pass by Hinata who, by this time, had a little house on a hill. Of course, it wasn't anything special, especially by Neji's thirteen-year-old standards, but for a twelve-year-old it was okay.
"Nice painting, Hinata." Said Neji, sounding creepy.
"Um…thanks?" said Hinata, sounding nervous.
"That's the MAIN House, isn't it?" Neji said.
"What is?" Hinata asked, trying to keep herself from stuttering.
"That house." Said Neji. "You drew it to portray the Main House, didn't you? And what's that right there? That smaller house that can hardly fit one person? That's the BRANCH House, isn't it?"
"Er…that's a dog house." Hinata said.
Neji gave a look of extreme dissatisfaction.
"That is SO like a member of the Main House to compare the Branch House to a place where DOGS live." Said Neji.
"You said that, not her." Shino said.
"She said it all right there in her painting." Neji commented.
Neji stood there and waited for Shino to respond to that, but when Shino didn't, he decided to leave. For some reason, because of Shino's lack of response, Neji didn't feel like he had won.
So Neji went over to where Sasuke was currently painting his sunflowers. He might have been happy, but one can never really tell with Sasuke. Neji leaned over, pretending to be interested in the painting and then, in a VERY petty fashion, tipped the entire can of yellow paint over…
RIGHT ON TO SASUKE'S PAINTING!!!
Neji immediately got all ready in his fighter's stance with his Byakugan and everything. Sasuke allowed the feelings of revenge to fester within him for a moment or two before exploding out of his seat, complete with his Sharinganed eyes and a half built up Chidori. And JUST when both contenders were about to go on the warpath, Sasuke suddenly stopped and allowed the Chidori to die out and his eyes to fizzle back to normal.
You see, he's pretty smart as long as he's not faced with Itachi. He realized that the one thing Neji wanted was to fight him and if he allowed his feelings of revenge to get the best of him, he'd only be PLEASING Neji as opposed to feeling satisfied after his defeat.
"What, don't you want to fight me?" said Neji, still all ready just in case. "I ruined your painting. There's not enough time left to start another one."
"No, no." said Sasuke, retrieving his chair that had been flung across the room when he had so enthusiastically risen from it. "It's quite all right. I'll start all over again."
"There's no way you'll win now." Neji said.
"I already have won." Sasuke said, sitting down in the chair.
Neji, once again, went into a state of shock. Sasuke cheered on the inside and pat himself on the back for having such a good comeback. Oh wait, that was Ino and Sakura patting him on the back. OH WELL!!
LATER!!!
"WE'RE BACK!!" said the teachers, barging through the door with their many souvenirs from Six Flags.
"You're hours late!!" said Naruto who, by this time, was covered in dry paint.
"Kakashi!" said Kurenai. "You said we were early!"
"We're early for me." Said Kakashi with a shrug.
"You know, I thought it was a bit strange that it had become dark out in a mere hour and a half we had been there." Asuma said cluelessly.
"OH WELL!!" said Gai.
"Not 'oh well'!!" said Naruto. "WE'VE BEEN HERE FOR SO LONG!!!"
"I'll just judge the paintings now!" said Iruka. "Everyone bring them forth so I may be the unbiased median!! But I'll start with Naruto because he's my favorite."
"OKAY!!" said Naruto since he has mood swings. "This is my painting right here."
Kiba stepped forward.
The teachers waited.
"I used Kiba as my canvas." Naruto explained.
"Oooohhhhh…" the teachers said with a nod.
"As you can see, I have painted him to look EXACTLY like Sakura!" said Naruto. "Notice the pink hair and the red outfit!"
"He tried to paint my eyes green but I had to wash the paint off because it hurt too much." Kiba explained.
The teachers didn't know exactly how to react to that.
"So tell them what I am!!" said Naruto to Kiba.
"Oh yeah!" said Kiba. "And I painted Naruto to look like Akamaru!!"
Akamaru barked at Kiba.
"Yeah." Said Kiba. "I agree."
"What did he say?" said Naruto.
"Nothing." Said Kiba.
"He said SOMETHING!" said Naruto.
"No he didn't." said Kiba as both he and Akamaru both stuck their tongues out at Naruto.
"OKAY!!" said Iruka. "That was weird. Let's move on. Um…Sasuke?"
"This was my…THIRD sunflower…" Sasuke said, throwing a look at Neji. "Thank you Neji, and because there was no more yellow paint… thank you AGAIN Neji, it is now an orange sunflower."
Neji didn't have anything to say to that.
"Oh, very interesting." Said Iruka, not even wanting to go to where this was headed. "Next?"
"LOOK AT MINE!!" Ino said, practically throwing her portrait of Sasuke at Iruka.
"NO!!" yelled Sakura. "MINE!!"
"Um…" Iruka said, looking to the other teachers for aid but the other teachers were currently doing assorted other activities that included nail filing, cigarette lighting, youthfully encouraging and reading. Try to guess who's doing what.
"Well?" said Ino.
"Whose is better?" Sakura said persistently.
"Um…I'm not judging right now!" Iruka said, secretly wishing he wasn't the unbiased median anymore. "I'm just looking at them!"
"Let's look at Shikamaru's wonderful painting now!" said Asuma.
"Wait!" said Gai. "None of my students have gotten the opportunity to show off their art!"
"You snooze, you lose!" said Asuma, grabbing the canvas of Shikamaru's easel, looking at it and then erupting into tears. "SHIKAMARU!! WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT?!"
"What did he paint?!" said Kurenai.
"Was it something naughty?" Kakashi asked, looking slightly interested.
"No!" said Asuma, turning it around. "It's BLANK!"
Shikamaru slapped his forehead. Maybe he should have done something after all.
"All right…" said Iruka, not wanting to dwell on that any longer.
"One of my students is next!!" said Gai, grabbing Tenten's painting since she was the closest to him at the time. "Look!! It's a portrait of our entire youthful team! I suppose you just did not have the time to complete ME seeings how I am nowhere to be found!"
"Um." Said Tenten.
"This is nice." Said Iruka with a nod but he was thinking about how off the proportions and stuff where but he wasn't about to SAY that!!
"Another one of my students is next!!" Gai announced. "I want to see Neji's extremely yellow painting."
"Extremely yellow?" Neji said with a raised eyebrow.
"Sasuke said you used all the yellow paint." Gai said.
"He wasn't NEARLY as constructive as that." Sasuke said with a glare.
"Oh!" said Iruka. "It's a birdie!"
"It's not a 'birdie'." Said Neji, doing quotes. "It's a caged bird. That bird is quite unhappy and therefore cannot be referred to as a 'birdie'."
"Why would you make an unhappy bird?" Iruka asked, looking confused.
"Don't ask!" Gai mouthed to Iruka from behind Neji who looked like he was about to start his famous ranting.
"OH!" said Iruka, catching on AT LAST. "Then let's quickly move on. Uh… how about Chouji?"
"Shikamaru and I played Tic-Tac-Toe and Hang Man on my canvas!" said Chouji, showing his picture to everyone. It looks like he had STARTED to paint something but had given up. Oh well. We can't ALL be artists.
"HEY!" said Gai. "LEE IS NEXT!!"
"No, Hinata is next!" said Kurenai. "Come on, Hinata, let's see your picture!"
"Um…I drew a house on a hill…" Hinata started, trying to ignore Neji's coughs that sounded remarkably like, 'Main House on a hill'.
"And a lovely house it is!" said Kurenai, ALSO trying to ignore Neji.
"YES!!" exclaimed Gai. "VERY WONDERFUL!! NOW LET'S LOOK AT LEE'S PICTURE BECAUSE WE SAVED THE BEST FOR LAST!!"
"YES GAI!!" said Lee, spinning his enormous canvas around… which was actually about eight canvases sitting on top of each other… to reveal this huge portrait of Gai, complete from head to toe.
"WOW!!" Gai said, tears streaming down his face. He was unable to express his happiness.
"Um…okay…" Iruka said uneasily. "I guess all that's left is to judge…"
"Wait a second!" said Kiba. "What about Shino's picture?!"
Everyone looked at Shino.
"Sorry about that Shino!" laughed Iruka. "I forgot all about you!"
"NOOOOOOOOO!!" Gai yelled. "LEE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE LAST!!"
"It's okay, Gai!!" said Lee as the two of them hugged.
"Well, let's see it." said Iruka, fully expecting to see some kind of BUG.
But then Shino spun it around to show a picture of his team, even Kurenai, all hanging out and being like… extremely realistic! They looked like a photo!!
"Awww…" said all the teachers in admiration.
"I think I can easily say that SHINO is the winner!" said Iruka.
"AFTER Shikamaru of course!!" protested Asuma.
"The winner of the art contest." Said Kurenai.
"Well, Shikamaru WOULD have won!" Asuma said, crossing his arms.
"Congratulations Shino!" said Hinata. "This is a really good painting! Did you do it without a reference?"
Shino raised an eyebrow. "I did Kurenai without a reference." He answered. "You two were here. And I know what I look like."
"You know what?" said Sasuke randomly. "I WOULD have won if I had some yellow paint. But it's kind of like that Charlie-in-the-Box. Nobody wants a Charlie-in-the-Box. Just like no one wants an orange sunflower."
"You have a Charlie-in-the-Box, don't you?" said Naruto.
"I don't want it." Sasuke said.
"You know, it's my fault that you didn't win, Sasuke." Said Neji.
"I know." Said Sasuke.
Neji waited. "You should fight me." He said finally when he realized that Sasuke was not processing the idea himself.
"No, that's all right." Sasuke said. "I don't care about an art contest. I don't try to excel in an art contest. I don't mind if Shino wins. Let Shino win his little art contest for all I care."
Shino turned around and glared at Sasuke.
Sasuke came very close to wincing at the intensity of Shino's glare but he quickly turned away so he could save face. Shino may have won the art contest, but that didn't mean he was better.
"What about second and third place?" asked Kiba. "I worked so hard."
"Sorry, no such thing." Said Kakashi.
Everyone was silent for a little while.
"All right." Said Gai. "You guys can go home now if you want.
"Except you, Shikamaru." Said Asuma. "You have to paint a picture."
Shikamaru gave Asuma a look. "In order to paint, I'll have to take off my chuunin vest." He said. "And, even though Kiba has paint on his hands, I'm going to have to ask him to hold it for me."
"What?!" said Asuma. "NO!! YOU MUSN'T!!"
"Just don't let Akamaru play in my chuunin vest, okay Kiba?" said Shikamaru.
"Wait…what?" said Kiba.
"Fine, fine, he can play in it if he WANTS to." Shikamaru sighed. Akamaru barked to show that he did, in fact, want to play in the chuunin vest.
"Okay!!" said Asuma. "I surrender!! You can go home if you wish."
"And I do wish to do so." Shikamaru said with a satisfied nod.
Everyone else, but mostly the teachers, rolled their eyes at Asuma's stupidity and then dispersed. Hoo-rah!!